Curveball – The Club you didn't want to be part of

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You're in a committed relationship or marriage built on love and trust, and you may have a family. What happens when you discover the man you thought you knew- your husband- is gay?

We hear perspectives from people who've "come out of the closet" later in life and their journey to self-acceptance and alignment—less about the collateral damage to their blindsided partners. How do you navigate bewilderment and betrayal while searching for missed clues, protecting your children, maintaining their connection with their father, and avoiding being part of the secrecy? Three women share their stories. 

(The children’s perspectives require another episode.) 

Please find resources below, including those mentioned during the podcast. 

I'm also sorry to say this is our FINAL episode, UNLESS we can find a benefactor willing to fund this podcast of women speaking anonymously about the greatest challenges of their lives. 

If you know a philanthropist invested in sharing women's wisdom, please direct them to contact [email protected]. We're entirely independent, with no advertising, self-funded and without earnings from the podcast- simply dedication and a labour of love. 

My profound thanks to the many women who've bravely shared their most challenging experiences with brutal honesty, camaraderie and humour, and thank you to our listeners and supporters. 

THANK YOU to my incredible partners: the award-winning, exceptional sound studio team at Unison Sound, and the talented graphic designers at Wise Brown Fox. From the bottom of my heart, thank you for your immense generosity and commitment to sharing women's voices about taboo topics. I'm so proud of what we've achieved: Gold for Australia’s Best Well Being Podcast when we launched with our first five episodes during COVID. Through word of mouth, we've had 109,160 downloads across 123 countries as of today, and we will likely never know the incredible impact the women sharing their stories have had on others' lives - they're not alone. 

New members join the Club You Didn’t Want To Be Part Of every day, so the stories and wisdom remain relevant. With marketing, our audience could be millions. 

Resources

https://www.womenpartners.org.au

Women Partners is an NSW-based service that offers individual counselling, support groups and Sexual Health information for all women whose male partners are Men who have Sex with Men, or have come out as gay or bisexual. If you are left wondering, "Is my husband gay? or "Is he bisexual?", you have come to the right place. You are not alone.

Telephone: 9560 3011 or free phone 1800 787887

Email: [email protected]

For Women Partners peer support, please visit https://ourpath.org/ or https://straightpartnersanonymous.com/

https://www.facebook.com/straightspousesupport/photos/

A recent ABC podcast featuring specialist counsellor Karen Bieman. 

https://www.abc.net.au/listen/programs/ladies-we-need-to-talk/gay-husband/107144112?utm_content=link&utm_medium=content_shared

Share women's wisdom worldwide  -  for everyone. 

To help, please write a review on your platform and share episodes. And please donate to help us record accessible and advert-free episodes via PayPal using this link.

https://www.paypal.com/donate/?hosted_button_id=7KGVGCLPX45K8

We appreciate your feedback and suggestions.
Contact Beth at:  [email protected]

Sound production: Unison Sound.
Producer: Luke Mynott, Beth Armstrong
Host: Beth Armstrong
Editor: Tom Herdman, Mija Healey.
Sound Engineer: Micayla Laurence, Cihan Siral.
Composer: Biddy Connor
Artwork: wisebrownfox

https://www.instagram.com/curveball_media/

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This is Part 2! Please listen to Part 1 first. Touch and sexual expression are a fundamental part of our humanity, a powerful way to connect with others and ourselves. Sex as a means of making a living - an ancient art - is rarely encouraged by career counsellors; so, what leads someone to become a sex worker, what’s it like and how does it impact them?

This episode is a departure. For the first time, I’ve invited men into this space. Inspired by the last Sex Workers - Life Lessons episodes, a listener suggested a conversation with mid-life straight male sex workers. To succeed in this work, I imagine it requires an ability to listen to and connect with women in an intensely personal way, so I was intrigued to hear about their experiences, views, and feelings. 

Share women's wisdom worldwide  -  for everyone. 

To help, please write a review on your platform and share episodes. And please donate to help us record accessible and advert-free episodes via PayPal using this link.

https://www.paypal.com/donate/?hosted_button_id=7KGVGCLPX45K8

We appreciate your feedback and suggestions.
Contact Beth at:  [email protected]

Sound production: Unison Sound.
Producer: Luke Mynott, Beth Armstrong
Host: Beth Armstrong
Editor: Tom Herdman, Mija Healey.
Sound Engineer: Micayla Laurence, Cihan Siral.
Composer: Biddy Connor
Artwork: wisebrownfox

https://www.instagram.com/curveball_media/

Send us Fan Mail

Touch and sexual expression are a fundamental part of our humanity, a powerful way to connect with others and ourselves. Sex as a means of making a living - an ancient art - is rarely encouraged by career counsellors; so, what leads someone to become a sex worker, what’s it like and how does it impact them?

This episode is a departure. For the first time, I’ve invited men into this space. Inspired by the last Sex Workers - Life Lessons episodes, a listener suggested a conversation with mid-life straight male sex workers. To succeed in this work, I imagine it requires an ability to listen to and connect with women in an intensely personal way, so I was intrigued to hear about their experiences, views, and feelings. 

Share women's wisdom worldwide  -  for everyone. 

To help, please write a review on your platform and share episodes. And please donate to help us record accessible and advert-free episodes via PayPal using this link.

https://www.paypal.com/donate/?hosted_button_id=7KGVGCLPX45K8

We appreciate your feedback and suggestions.
Contact Beth at:  [email protected]

Sound production: Unison Sound.
Producer: Luke Mynott, Beth Armstrong
Host: Beth Armstrong
Editor: Tom Herdman, Mija Healey.
Sound Engineer: Micayla Laurence, Cihan Siral.
Composer: Biddy Connor
Artwork: wisebrownfox

https://www.instagram.com/curveball_media/

Send us Fan Mail

We all have a different understanding of our sexuality. Depending on our circumstances and upbringing, many of us are left to discover it on our own. If there's any education, sex is generally taught as something precious and private between two people in a relationship, with an emphasis on baby-making, not pleasure. Touch and sexual expression are a fundamental part of our humanity, a powerful way to connect with others and ourselves, experience pleasure and express desire. Sex as a commodity, as a means of making a living - an ancient art - is rarely encouraged by career counsellors; so, what leads one to become a sex worker, what's it like and how does it impact you? 

Guided by host Beth Armstrong, the guests share their stories of how they came to sex work, their experiences and revelations. Three women of different generations, one in their thirties, seventies and eighties, share their intimate stories and life lessons. It's a revolutionary and revelationary discussion, including advice for those considering the profession.

Please note: * Content warning for discussion of sexual assault, rape, suicide and child abuse that some viewers may find distressing—intended for an adult audience. If you need help, please call Lifeline or Beyond Blue. 

Sex Worker's Outreach Project (SWOP)
https://swop.org.au/what-we-do/swopconnect

Scarlett's alliance - https://scarletalliance.org.au/
Australian Sex Workers Association. 

Share women's wisdom worldwide  -  for everyone. 

To help, please write a review on your platform and share episodes. And please donate to help us record accessible and advert-free episodes via PayPal using this link.

https://www.paypal.com/donate/?hosted_button_id=7KGVGCLPX45K8

We appreciate your feedback and suggestions.
Contact Beth at:  [email protected]

Sound production: Unison Sound.
Producer: Luke Mynott, Beth Armstrong
Host: Beth Armstrong
Editor: Tom Herdman, Mija Healey.
Sound Engineer: Micayla Laurence, Cihan Siral.
Composer: Biddy Connor
Artwork: wisebrownfox

https://www.instagram.com/curveball_media/

Send us Fan Mail

We all have a different understanding of our sexuality. Depending on our circumstances and upbringing, many of us are left to discover it on our own. If there's any education, sex is generally taught as something precious and private between two people in a relationship, with an emphasis on baby-making, not pleasure. Touch and sexual expression are a fundamental part of our humanity, a powerful way to connect with others and ourselves, experience pleasure and express desire. Sex as a commodity, as a means of making a living - an ancient art - is rarely encouraged by career counsellors; so, what leads one to become a sex worker, what's it like and how does it impact you? 

Guided by host Beth Armstrong, the guests share their stories of how they came to sex work, their experiences and revelations. Three women of different generations, one in their thirties, seventies and eighties, share their intimate stories and life lessons. It's a revolutionary and revelationary discussion, including advice for those considering the profession.

Please note: * Content warning for discussion of sexual assault, rape, suicide and child abuse that some viewers may find distressing—intended for an adult audience. If you need help, please call Lifeline or Beyond Blue. 

Sex Worker's Outreach Project (SWOP)
https://swop.org.au/what-we-do/swopconnect

Scarlett's alliance - https://scarletalliance.org.au/
Australian Sex Workers Association. 

Share women's wisdom worldwide  -  for everyone. 

To help, please write a review on your platform and share episodes. And please donate to help us record accessible and advert-free episodes via PayPal using this link.

https://www.paypal.com/donate/?hosted_button_id=7KGVGCLPX45K8

We appreciate your feedback and suggestions.
Contact Beth at:  [email protected]

Sound production: Unison Sound.
Producer: Luke Mynott, Beth Armstrong
Host: Beth Armstrong
Editor: Tom Herdman, Mija Healey.
Sound Engineer: Micayla Laurence, Cihan Siral.
Composer: Biddy Connor
Artwork: wisebrownfox

https://www.instagram.com/curveball_media/

Send us Fan Mail

What happens when you can't pay the rent or find anywhere cheaper? Perhaps you or your dependents are ill, divorce or loss has left you short, or you're unemployed or retired with minimal savings, or you've left a bad situation. No one imagines they will one day become homeless. Women over 55 are the largest growing cohort in Australia. What's it like to face homelessness?   

Guided by the host, Beth Armstrong, the guests share their stories of hardship, how they came to the point of homelessness and the subsequent impact on their lives. 
In the first episode, they share their life stories and the process they went through to find a home; in this second episode, they share personal triumphs and trials, discuss their views on what needs to change and offer advice for others who may find themselves facing homelessness or want to advocate for others. 
Please note:  * Content warning for discussion of child sexual abuse and sexual violence that some may find distressing. If you need help, please call Lifeline or Beyond Blue.

• TA = temporary accommodation
• HAAG = Housing for the Aged Action Group                https://www.oldertenants.org.au/haag/about
• CHIA = Community Housing Industry Association https://www.communityhousing.com.au/
• Wesley Edward Eagar Lodge                                                                                                             Crisis and emergency accommodation in Sydney, NSW.
• Homeless Persons hotline
• CBT = Cognitive Behaviour Therapy 
• Departing of Community Housing                                             https://www.service.nsw.gov.au/nswgovdirectory/dcj-housing

COPD = Chronic obstructive pulmonary disease

Share women's wisdom worldwide  -  for everyone. 

To help, please write a review on your platform and share episodes. And please donate to help us record accessible and advert-free episodes via PayPal using this link.

https://www.paypal.com/donate/?hosted_button_id=7KGVGCLPX45K8

We appreciate your feedback and suggestions.
Contact Beth at:  [email protected]

Sound production: Unison Sound.
Producer: Luke Mynott, Beth Armstrong
Host: Beth Armstrong
Editor: Tom Herdman, Mija Healey.
Sound Engineer: Micayla Laurence, Cihan Siral.
Composer: Biddy Connor
Artwork: wisebrownfox

https://www.instagram.com/curveball_media/

Send us Fan Mail

What happens when you can't pay the rent or find anywhere cheaper? Perhaps you or your dependents are ill, divorce or loss has left you short, or you're unemployed or retired with minimal savings, or you've left a bad situation. No one imagines they will one day become homeless. Women over 55 are the largest growing cohort in Australia. What's it like to face homelessness?   

Guided by the host, Beth Armstrong, the guests share their stories of hardship, how they came to the point of homelessness and the subsequent impact on their lives. In this first episode, they share their life stories and the process they went through to find a home; in the second episode, they discuss their views on what needs to change, share personal triumphs and trials and offer advice for others embarking on the process.
 * Content warning for content covering child sexual abuse and sexual violence that some listeners may find distressing. If you need help, please call Lifeline or Beyond Blue.

• TA = temporary accommodation
• HAAG = Housing for the Aged Action Group                https://www.oldertenants.org.au/haag/about
• CHIA = Community Housing Industry Association https://www.communityhousing.com.au/
• Wesley Edward Eagar Lodge                                                                                                             Crisis and emergency accommodation in Sydney, NSW.
• Homeless Persons hotline
• CBT = Cognitive Behaviour Therapy 
• Departing of Community Housing                                             https://www.service.nsw.gov.au/nswgovdirectory/dcj-housing

COPD = Chronic obstructive pulmonary disease

Share women's wisdom worldwide  -  for everyone. 

To help, please write a review on your platform and share episodes. And please donate to help us record accessible and advert-free episodes via PayPal using this link.

https://www.paypal.com/donate/?hosted_button_id=7KGVGCLPX45K8

We appreciate your feedback and suggestions.
Contact Beth at:  [email protected]

Sound production: Unison Sound.
Producer: Luke Mynott, Beth Armstrong
Host: Beth Armstrong
Editor: Tom Herdman, Mija Healey.
Sound Engineer: Micayla Laurence, Cihan Siral.
Composer: Biddy Connor
Artwork: wisebrownfox

https://www.instagram.com/curveball_media/

Send us Fan Mail

Part Two - we highly recommend listening to Part 1 first!

In Australia, drinking alcohol is invariably a rite of passage into adulthood, an intrinsic part of our culture for better or worse. It’s fun, relaxing and a social lubricant; sometimes, it becomes a coping mechanism to deal with stress, anxiety or unpleasant emotions. What happens when you’re compelled to drink even though you know it’s causing you problems? 

Guided by the host, Beth Armstrong, the guests share their stories of how drinking alcohol became problematic and the steps they took to get help, recover and grow from the experience. Speaking anonymously, they share the misconceptions, silver linings and pitfalls and offer advice for others embarking on the process. 

* Content warning - adult themes. If you need help, please call Lifeline or Beyond Blue.

Share women's wisdom worldwide  -  for everyone. 

To help, please write a review on your platform and share episodes. And please donate to help us record accessible and advert-free episodes via PayPal using this link.

https://www.paypal.com/donate/?hosted_button_id=7KGVGCLPX45K8

We appreciate your feedback and suggestions.
Contact Beth at:  [email protected]

Sound production: Unison Sound.
Producer: Luke Mynott, Beth Armstrong
Host: Beth Armstrong
Editor: Tom Herdman, Mija Healey.
Sound Engineer: Micayla Laurence, Cihan Siral.
Composer: Biddy Connor
Artwork: wisebrownfox

https://www.instagram.com/curveball_media/

Send us Fan Mail

In Australia, drinking alcohol is invariably a rite of passage into adulthood, an intrinsic part of our culture for better or worse. It’s fun, relaxing and a social lubricant; sometimes, it becomes a coping mechanism to deal with stress, anxiety or unpleasant emotions. What happens when you’re compelled to drink even though you know it’s causing you problems? 

Guided by the host, Beth Armstrong, three articulate women share their stories of how drinking alcohol became problematic and the steps they took to get help, recover and grow from the experience. Speaking anonymously, they share misconceptions, silver linings and pitfalls and offer advice for others embarking on the process. 

* Content warning - adult themes. If you need help, please call Lifeline or Beyond Blue.

Share women's wisdom worldwide  -  for everyone. 

To help, please write a review on your platform and share episodes. And please donate to help us record accessible and advert-free episodes via PayPal using this link.

https://www.paypal.com/donate/?hosted_button_id=7KGVGCLPX45K8

We appreciate your feedback and suggestions.
Contact Beth at:  [email protected]

Sound production: Unison Sound.
Producer: Luke Mynott, Beth Armstrong
Host: Beth Armstrong
Editor: Tom Herdman, Mija Healey.
Sound Engineer: Micayla Laurence, Cihan Siral.
Composer: Biddy Connor
Artwork: wisebrownfox

https://www.instagram.com/curveball_media/

Send us Fan Mail

We leave school with plans to study or work and an idea of how life might unfold, but as the saying goes: "Life is what happens when we're busy making other plans." Some people want to change course or expand, returning to study at a later age. Is it ever too late to start again? Tonight's club is Mature Age Students. 

Beth Armstrong guides a conversation between three generous, articulate and thoughtful women who speak anonymously about how and why they came to study in mid-life and beyond,  their fears, experiences,  and discoveries. 

Share women's wisdom worldwide  -  for everyone. 

To help, please write a review on your platform and share episodes. And please donate to help us record accessible and advert-free episodes via PayPal using this link.

https://www.paypal.com/donate/?hosted_button_id=7KGVGCLPX45K8

We appreciate your feedback and suggestions.
Contact Beth at:  [email protected]

Sound production: Unison Sound.
Producer: Luke Mynott, Beth Armstrong
Host: Beth Armstrong
Editor: Tom Herdman, Mija Healey.
Sound Engineer: Micayla Laurence, Cihan Siral.
Composer: Biddy Connor
Artwork: wisebrownfox

https://www.instagram.com/curveball_media/