Raising Elite Competitors

Don't Try This At Home...Confidence Quick Fixes That Don't Work


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Are you trying to lift up your daughter’s confidence through quick fixes? 

Picture this: your daughter comes up to you and says, “I don’t think I’m good enough to win this competition or even make it to the official team lineup.” Your athlete is starting to deal with confidence and esteem issues. Now, you want to come up with something that can help her, a quick fix, if you will. 

What are these quick fixes? 

Quick Fix #1: Praise

This one is tough! We want to praise our athletes and make them feel good. However, if athletes are relying on praise and external validation to build their internal confidence, they will always be at the mercy of other people rather than themselves.

Real confidence comes from athletes being internally validated. When athletes know their value, worth, and measure of success isn't outside of them, it's within them.

Quick Fix #2: Focusing On Outcomes

“Outcomes” - wins/losses, stats, and performance - are a part of an athlete’s experience and can provide data to adjust moving forward. However, if athletes are placing all the emphasis on outcomes as the measure of how confident they feel, they will always be up and down with the score.

Quick Fix #3: Fake It Till You Make It

We’ve all heard the phrase… “fake it ‘till you make it!” It sounds good, and that it actually might work. Not feeling confident? Just fake it and eventually, it will come!

But, “fake it ‘till you make it” is the perfect example of the superficial confidence we want to avoid.

We can’t fake...

  • Proper preparation
  • Intentional self-talk
  • The ability to come back from mistakes (if we don’t have the skills to do so).

Real confidence comes when athletes have systems in place. They have routines, rituals, and habits that lead to their success so they don't have to "fake it."

Quick Fix #4: Google University

You can probably go searching the interweb for advice, tips, tricks, or a youtube video that will help solve a problem.

Here's are the needed keys to cultivating the mindset skills that lead to lasting confidence:

  • Proven skills that build on one another
  • Intentional practice
  • Accountability
  • Just like any other skill that your daughter practices in her sport!

For athletes to develop this long-term confidence, they need to incorporate mindset work just like they incorporate the physical part of the game.

It doesn't take long - but "quick fixes" can only go so far.

Don't wait until your athlete is struggling to try to teach mindset skills.

Don't wait until you need a "quick fix" to realize how important the mental side of the game is.

She needs these skills front-loaded! Which is exactly what we teach in The Elite Competitor Program.

**********

Helpful Links:

  • Join the Elite Competitor Program waitlist to be the first to know when doors open!
  • Visit our podcast website for more on this episode
  • Download the free resources we've created for you
  • Join us inside our FREE Facebook Group - The Elite Competitor Society - for weekly Q&A, periodic training and challenges, and the support of an amazing community of moms, coaches, and the men who partner with us!

The BEST way to help us spread the word and get this information into the hands of millions of parents, coaches, and female athletes is by leaving a rating and review on Apple Podcasts. Thank you in advance for joining us on our mission!

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Raising Elite CompetitorsBy Coach Bre

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