Your Anxiety Toolkit - Practical Skills for Anxiety, Panic & Depression

Ep. 88: The Flow of Recovery


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The Flow of Recovery

In today’s episode of Your Anxiety Toolkit, we are talking all about Recovery.  Yes, we know! This can be a controversial conversation, especially when talking about recovery for Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD), Eating Disorders, Anxiety Disorders and Body Focused Repetitive Behaviors (BFRB’s).  

The truth is, achieving this thing called “recovery” depends mostly on your definition of recovery.  There can be a very big difference of opinion when it comes to what is considered “recovery.”  

In today’s podcast, we talk all about recovery and what I like to call, “The FLOW of recovery.”  Finding your own Flow of Recovery is what I think will help you so much with the speed and ease of your recovery, not matter what your definition is.  I have seen this idea of FLOW of recovery to be a huge part of OCD and Anxiety recovery for many.   

As you may know, last week we had the amazing Kristin Neff on the podcast (Ep. 87) where she shared her brilliant research and practice of Mindful Self-Compassion.   She shared about the importance of including self-compassion in our everyday lives and different compiments of self-compassion that can help us live a better life.   Some people have the faulty belief that self-compassion is for sissys.  Some hold onto the huge misconception that the practice of self-compassion will make us weak or lazy or fat or a loser.  Many of my clients have told me that they are too afraid to practice (or even consider) practicing self-compassion because it might make them snap and turn lazy and never get out of bed again.  So typical of anxiety, isn’t it?  Kristin Neff talked about the Yin and Yang of self-compassion (go to that episode to hear more).  She believes that self-compassion must include both the Yin of self-compassion, which is like a mother tenderly comforting her crying child and the Yang of self-compassion, which is the mother bear that shows up for ourselves, ferociously protecting her cubs (and us) from harm. 

As we mentioned before, many of us struggle with fearing becoming too Yin, and some people do the opposite and are afraid to step into the Yang of self-compassion.  As a result, they avoid getting their needs met.  They avoid everything.  So, when we talk about “The Flow of Recovery” we are talking about using both the Yin and the Yang of self-compassion to help you FLOW.  The Flow of Recovery is moving from action to gentleness and rest.   The Flow of Recovery involves slowing down sometimes and other times the flow of recovery involves speeding up.  Sometimes, the flow of recovery involves moving back and forth between the Yin and Yang quite quickly.  

 Today, in this podcast, I want to inspire you to begin using both the Yin and YANG of self-compassion.  My use of the term the flow of recovery is all about doing the hard things (YANG) and then slowing down to be gentle (YIN).  You are going to use these tools, not once, but over and over again.  And you are going to find a flow where you swing back and forth and back and forth between action and rest, action and rest.  

The action could be ERP, setting a boundary with someone, starting therapy, sharing your struggles with a friend, and the rest is where you get really quiet and ask yourself what it is that you need and make sure you find a way to give that to yourself.  

The Flow of Recovery is also the gentle swing of saying really gentle and kind things to yourself and then speaking almost as a coach.  “I can do this hard thing!” And “I will get through this” and “I have my own back, unconditionally.” 

So, to sum it all up, the principle of Yin and Yang is that all things exist as inseparable and contradictory opposites, and this is so true for recovery.  

I urge you to check in and see if you have a Yin and a Yang.  How can you add more Yang if you rely too much on Yin?  How can you add some Yin if you are stuck in a cycle of all action and no self-care?

And lastly, please note that ERP School is open until February 18th!  Shhh…we kept the cart open a few more days.  

ERP School is our online course that teaches you all the most important components of ERP for Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.

Exposure and Response Prevention School (ERP School)  is an online course that teaches you the tools and skills I teach my clients in my office.  Let me tell you a little bit about it.   

The course is a video based course that includes modules on 

  1. The science behind ERP 
  2. Identifying YOUR obsessions and your compulsions 
  3. The different approaches and types of ERP, including gradual exposure, writing scripts, interoceptive exposures and how to get creative with ERP 
  4. Mindfulness tools to help you manage anxiety, panic and uncertainty 
  5. Troubleshoot common questions and concerns 
  6. BONUS 6 videos of the most common subtypes of OCD

The course also includes many downloadable PDF’s and activities to help you navigate how to best apply ERP to your specific obsessions and compulsions.  

We are so excited to share ERP with you and would love to have you join us and the CBT School Community.  It’s a beautiful day to do hard things! 

If you are worried about doing it alone, please don’t fear.  We meet bi-monthly on the Facebook group and on Instagram to talk about questions you may have. 

Click HERE to sign up.   

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Your Anxiety Toolkit - Practical Skills for Anxiety, Panic & DepressionBy Kimberley Quinlan, LMFT | Anxiety & OCD Specialist

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