Reigniting Desire in Midlife with Dr. Diane Mueller: Stress, Hormones & Real-World Intimacy Fixes

Desire doesn’t vanish in midlife—it evolves. In this episode of Asking for a Friend, certified sexologist Dr. Diane Mueller joins host Michele Folan to unpack what really happens to libido, intimacy, and connection as hormones shift, stress piles up, and long-term relationships get comfortable.

We explore the science of midlife desire, from how oxytocin calms cortisol and improves sleep to how vibration therapy and pelvic floor health can ease pain and increase pleasure. You’ll learn the difference between “wanting to want” and true arousal, how testosterone fits into the libido puzzle, and why body image and tissue health deserve as much attention as hormones.

Dr. Mueller introduces her concept of “erotic repair”—a framework that moves intimacy beyond penetration and toward curiosity, communication, and play. Together, we tackle mismatched desire, dopamine boredom, and the single most important habit separating happy couples from disconnected ones: talking specifically about what feels good.

Expect evidence-based tools and real-world scripts you can try tonight—like the Yes/No/Maybe exercise that makes awkward conversations easier. Whether you’re navigating menopause, rebuilding intimacy after stress, or simply craving more connection, this episode delivers honest, science-backed guidance with zero fluff.

 Dr. Dian Mueller's book: https://WantToWantIt.com

Free Libido Quiz to get to the root causes of low libido: https://LibidoQuiz.com

Free - Yes, No, Maybe Checklist to bring in novelty: https://MySexDoc.com

Recommended Lubes and products: https://MyLibidoDoc.com/Products 

IG: https://instagram.com/myromancedoc

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If you’re doing “all the right things” and still feel stuck, it may be time to look deeper. I’ve partnered with EllieMD, a trusted telehealth platform offering modern solutions for women in midlife—including micro-dosed GLP-1 peptide therapy—to support metabolic health and longevity.

https://elliemd.com/michelefolan - Create a free account to view all products.

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🎤 In addition to coaching, I speak to women’s groups, moderate health panel discussions, and bring experts together for real, evidence-based conversations about midlife health.

Transcripts are created with AI and may not be perfectly accurate.

Disclaimer: This podcast is for general informational purposes only and does not constitute the practice of medicine, nursing, or other professional healthcare services. It is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your qualified healthcare provider with any questions regarding a medical condition.