Hey everyone—We’re diving into a topic that gets tossed around a lot but rarely unpacked in a way that actually matters: self-care. If you’ve ever felt confused or overwhelmed by what self-care really is (and isn’t), this is for you. In this episode, we unpack the myths, call out the cultural noise, and get real about what it truly means to care for yourself, especially during midlife.

We talk about the difference between real self-care and the performative kind, and how embodying your values, setting boundaries, and nurturing self-compassion can actually refill your tank. We’re sharing personal practices, therapeutic insights, and a whole lot of laughter as we redefine what it means to be replenished. It’s not spa days and wine nights (though, we won’t judge if you enjoy those too!). Get ready to reframe self-care in a way that truly supports the life you’re trying to build.

 

Episode Highlights:

[0:02] - Welcome back + intro to real self-care vs. cultural hype.
 [1:13] - Why “self-care” can feel like a loaded or empty word.
 [2:06] - Breaking down faux self-care and the influence of marketing.
 [4:28] - The truth about performing femininity and hustle culture.
 [7:45] - Defining escapism vs. true replenishment.
 [10:40] - Tuning into your inner needs and building self-awareness.
 [12:44] - Real self-care is simple: boundaries, balance, connection.
 [14:59] - The power of self-compassion and Kristen Neff’s work.
 [18:41] - Our own self-care routines and mindsets.
 [24:17] - The role of creativity and play in replenishment.
 [29:22] - Why unstructured time is essential.
 [30:27] - Struggles with attention and learning to do one thing at a time.
 [31:06] - Rediscovering the joy and nourishment of reading.
 [32:24] - Final reflections + practical takeaways.

 

Resources:

Midlife Master Class Waitlist: insightsfromthecouch.org

Kristen Neff’s Self-Compassion Work: self-compassion.org

 

Make sure to visit the “Resources” page on our website www.insightsfromthecouch.org to download the worksheet and take ways that accompany each episode. This is hugely important as we are now creating a download that is unique to each episode and working hard to create an email list to support our programming offerings moving forward. 

Pre-order The Cost of Quiet now! Colette’s new book, The Cost of Quiet: How to Have the Hard Conversations that Create Secure, Lasting Love, launches February 3rd. Secure your copy today and get VIP bonuses available only before launch day. https://www.colettejanefehr.com/new-book

🎙️ Love the podcast? Come talk about episodes with us inside The Midlife Chat. It’s a free, private community just for women at midlife who want to keep these conversations going. We’ve created this space for real talk, fresh resources, and honest connection—where you can share ideas and resources, ask questions, and get support from women navigating the same season. Come join us—we’d love to have you!

👉 Join The Midlife Chat here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/795863256460970/

Pre-order The Cost of Quiet now! Colette’s new book, The Cost of Quiet: How to Have the Hard Conversations that Create Secure, Lasting Love, launches February 3rd. Secure your copy today and get VIP bonuses available only before launch day.