The VBAC Homebirth Stories Podcast

EP84 | My past is affecting my ability to find the support that I crave this pregnancy


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In this episode, I am answering a question that a listener sent in recently. 

Thanks so much for sending in your question. It's an important topic that I wanted to speak to as I have been in this position before - and it can feel quite powerless being in a position of vulnerability and not feeling safe to trust people.

I'd like to know how you can find trust again in your instincts. I had a lot of failed support that I paid for last year. Every single person let me down. I'm pregnant now and I don't trust anyone.

My past is affecting my ability to find the support that I crave during this pregnancy.

  1. Look at the past times and try and understand why those people let you down.
  2. Quite often it feels personal because it is personal. It's happening to us and people let us down - but often it isn't about us at all.  People are often focused on their own chaos and lives.

    I discuss the different groups of support people and what can be stopping them from showing up in a way  you need & deserve:

    • The System - Doctors, Midwives & medical staff 
    • Doulas & birthworkers
    • Homebirth Midwives 
    • Family & friends 
    • How we can call in the right support:

      1. Set brave intentions and send out the calling - the energy into the world that you want
      2. Make sure the person you choose is someone you align with and feels right - listen to your intuition and don't silence that voice when it speaks to you
      3. Set reasonable expectations for people
      4. Call in your support circle - a lot of the time you need a circle of support - not one person can support you - you need a safe circle of support
      5. See if you can see testimonials or speak to others who have worked with that person - find out what you liked about working with that person.
      6. Hire someone like me to work on being your support person who doesn't have a registration or other fear factor working with you - who can help you set up the right team and help you navigate those tricky conversations and boundaries etc
      7. Enjoy this episode! 

        Ashley x 

        If you want to ask a question I would love to hear from you please send me an email at:  [email protected]

        More from Ashley

        Join our VBAC Homebirth Support Group here 

        Insta: @ashleylwinning


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        The VBAC Homebirth Stories PodcastBy Ashley Winning

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