Ask the Unfaithful

Episode 16: How Do the Unfaithful Invalidate the Betrayed's Feelings?


Listen Later

Maybe you've said this before or had it said to you, but it's a common yet problematic statement for couples trying to heal from the devastation of infidelity or addiction: "I feel like I'm never heard OR that my feelings are always minimized or just plain invalidated." We unfaithful have this masterful ability to quite often minimize or completely invalidate our partner's feelings, leaving them feeling both hopeless and helpless for a better future or healed relationship. The truth is, sometimes we don't even know that we're doing it. If you grew up like myself, 'fighting was a form of communication' but I had to learn that not all families communicate the way mine did.

Perhaps you too grew up the same way? Or maybe you grew up in a family where no one talked about their feelings and just found a way to move forward, keeping their feelings and emotions to themselves, only to feel unseen and unheard wondering why now, their partners emotions and feelings are scary if not terrifying? Sometimes as unfaithful we just don't get it and quite honestly, some times we don't want to get it. Emotions, feelings, pain, anger and the like can be scary to us unfaithful and we have no clue how our actions not only alienate the betrayed but further traumatize them.

The good news is, today we share practical ways to identify not only when we are invalidating our betrayed's feelings but also just how we are doing this invalidating. We'll go a step further and actually translate some very statements we all have used as unfaithful and what they really mean to the betrayed.

Today's conversation is like always, a very direct, no nonsense yet compassionate discussion that's sure to help both the unfaithful and the betrayed.

------

Our Website: www.AskTheUnfaithful.com

Contact us: [email protected]

Find James & Sharon at the CORE Relationship Recovery website: www.HopeForUs.com

Find more from Sam at Sam's Healing Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/@samshealingp...

Follow James at LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/james-annear-lmhc-704551157

Follow CORE Relationship Recovery (James & Sharon) on Facebook: www.facebook.com/CORERelationshipRecovery

...more
View all episodesView all episodes
Download on the App Store

Ask the UnfaithfulBy James & Sam

  • 5
  • 5
  • 5
  • 5
  • 5

5

11 ratings


More shows like Ask the Unfaithful

View all
The Save The Marriage Podcast by Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D.

The Save The Marriage Podcast

407 Listeners

Betrayal Trauma Recovery by Anne Blythe, M.Ed.

Betrayal Trauma Recovery

1,406 Listeners

Healing Broken Trust In Your Marriage After Infidelity by Brad and Morgan Robinson

Healing Broken Trust In Your Marriage After Infidelity

736 Listeners

Relationship Revival Podcast: Expert Advice on Relationships, Marriage, Dating by Nicola Beer

Relationship Revival Podcast: Expert Advice on Relationships, Marriage, Dating

379 Listeners

The Addicted Mind Podcast by Duane Osterlind, LMFT

The Addicted Mind Podcast

621 Listeners

The Couples Therapist Couch by Shane Birkel

The Couples Therapist Couch

265 Listeners

From Crisis to Connection - with Geoff & Jody Steurer by Geoff & Jody Steurer

From Crisis to Connection - with Geoff & Jody Steurer

201 Listeners

Helping Couples Heal Podcast by Marnie Breecker

Helping Couples Heal Podcast

427 Listeners

Heal from Infidelity by Andrea Giles

Heal from Infidelity

320 Listeners

Redemptive Living Radio by Redemptive Living Radio

Redemptive Living Radio

198 Listeners

Tell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating by Tracy Schorn, Sarah Gorrell

Tell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating

134 Listeners