September 27, 2024

Episode 23: The Scapegoat Child with Dr. Sherrie

47 minutes

“Toxic family systems are run like a cult,” says Dr. Sherrie Campbell, a licensed clinical psychologist specializing in family estrangement and toxic relationships. She joins Dr. Z this week to talk about the lasting damage narcissistic family members can inflict—not just on the immediate family but also on extended relatives and friends. Sharing insights from her own experience with toxic parenting, Dr. Campbell explains the roles of the golden child and the scapegoat, pointing out the often overlooked pressure on the golden child as well as the emotional burden carried by the scapegoat.

Dr. Campbell also addresses the stigma surrounding family estrangement and how guilt and shame often follow the decision to cut ties with toxic relatives. This episode touches on the emotional uncertainty that comes with estrangement and shows the importance of self-acceptance and rewriting one’s personal story to move from victimhood into empowerment.

Tune into this episode as Dr. Campbell and Dr. Z share practical tips for healing and navigating these complex relationships, leaving listeners with the hope that a more authentic, fulfilling life is possible beyond the toxic family dynamics.

Quotes

“When you have two grotesquely self-centered parents, they’re already competing with each other before the children are born for power. And then when the children are born, they then compete for power in that aspect as well… The most toxic person in the family dynamic is the least confronted. So you would think that it would be the most confronted, but they’re the least confronted because everybody else is in fear. So without fear, there cannot be any control. Toxic family systems are run like a cult.” (03:11 | Dr. Sherrie Campbell)

“Sick families need a scapegoat to externalize their issues onto, so they never have to confront or look at themselves.” (15:08 | Dr. Sherrie Campbell)

“I always say to people, when you’re talking about patterns of family dynamics, there’s a ‘dance.’ And when one person in that dance goes left instead of right, it throws the entire system off balance. When you have the healthy person in the family, whether it’s an aunt, uncle, sister, brother, it doesn’t matter—when they go left instead of right, the whole system gets thrown off balance.” (15:17 | Dr. Z)

Links

Connect with Dr. Sherrie Campbell:

www.facebook.com/sherriecamobellphd

https://www.instagram.com/dr.sherrie/

https://www.tiktok.com/@dr.sherrie

Dr. Sherrie's Tedx Talk: https://youtu.be/deyHwDkG7oc?si=CkgnoNZ05dBS6y4G

Sherapy Sessions podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/ph/podcast/sherapy-sessions-cutting-toxic-family-ties/id1591691842

Adult Survivors of Emotionally Abusive Parents: How to Heal, Cultivate Emotional Resilience, and Build the Life and Love You Deserve: https://amzn.to/3XEnfCD

https://www.drjaimezuckerman.com/

https://www.zgrouptherapy.com/

https://www.instagram.com/dr.z_psychologist/

https://www.tiktok.com/@dr.z_psychologist

Shop my new Mindfully Messy hoodie here: http://www.drjaimezuckerman.com/apparel

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By Dr. Jaime Zuckerman

4.9

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