Raising Boys & Girls

Episode 333: Finding Your Peace as a Parent (and Finding Your No, too) with Enneagram 9’s, Hillary Rector & Andy Gullahorn


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Hillary Rector and Andy Gullahorn share an honest, thoughtful look at what it’s like to move through the world—and parent—as Enneagram Nines. They discuss the genuine ease, adaptability, and steady presence that come naturally to them, along with the quieter struggles: delayed emotions, difficulty voicing desires, and the instinct to “smooth the ice” for everyone around them. Their stories highlight both the gentleness and complexity of this peaceful number.

Hillary and Andy reflect on how their nine-ness shapes their parenting—helping them create a calm, grounded environment, while also challenging them to build clearer boundaries, name their needs, and show their kids a more defined sense of self. They offer practical insight for supporting nine children, encouraging parents to give them time, space, and gentle opportunities to speak up and step in. It’s a compassionate, warm conversation for anyone who loves a nine or is raising one.

If you liked this episode, we think you’ll probably like:

  • Episode 121: Storing Up Good Memories for Your Kids with Hillary and Ben Rector

  • Episode 18: Using the Enneagram to Understand and Parent Kids and Adolescents

    . . . . . . 

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