In this episode, we talk empathic and effective alternatives to punishments and rewards.

We discuss the cultural background of punishments and rewards.

We share about compliance and the impact on children of punishments and shaming, and the ‘good girl and good boy’ syndrome.

We offer how we can help our children want to cooperate, contribute, apologise and repair because they feel those things from the inside.

We also explore the long term effects of punishments, and how punishment in childhood leads to inner punishment in adulthood - the harsh thoughts, the shame, the guilt and the judgment.

We ask, "How would you like your child’s inner dialogue to be?"

Books:

Cooperative and Connected by Aletha Solter

Punished by Rewards by Alfie Kohn