If you’ve ever found yourself being accused of things you didn’t do, or being labelled with traits that clearly belong to the narcissist themselves, chances are you’ve experienced this toxic psychological trick firsthand. In this powerful episode, we explore one of the most insidious tactics narcissists use to manipulate and emotionally destabilise their victims – projection

Projection is a defence mechanism that allows narcissists to avoid taking accountability for their actions. Instead of owning up to their own flaws, behaviours, or toxic attitudes, they shift the blame onto you. Suddenly, you’re the one who’s "too sensitive," "selfish," "lying," or "manipulative." It’s a calculated move designed not only to confuse and disarm you, but to make you question your own reality and integrity.

We break down exactly how and why narcissists project, with real-world examples drawn from counselling sessions, survivor stories, and lived experiences. You’ll learn how this tactic often shows up in narcissistic relationships – from romantic partners and parents to workplace bullies and toxic friends – and the emotional toll it takes on victims.

This episode also highlights the emotional confusion and cognitive dissonance that projection creates. Narcissists are masters at using it to gaslight and distort the truth, making it incredibly difficult for victims to identify what’s real. We’ll talk about the circular arguments, the deflection, and the rage that often accompanies projection when you dare to stand up for yourself or question their narrative.

We also unpack why narcissists rely so heavily on projection. Whether it’s to preserve their fragile ego, avoid guilt, or maintain their false self-image, projection serves as a smokescreen that keeps the narcissist in control while leaving you doubting yourself.

If you’ve ever felt like you were being punished for someone else’s behaviour, made to feel responsible for the narcissist’s emotions, or gaslit into silence by relentless accusations, this episode is a must-listen. Understanding projection is a crucial step in unravelling the narcissist’s manipulation and reclaiming your voice, clarity, and confidence.

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Nova xx

Why do narcissists seem to lash out when you're at your happiest? Why do they ruin birthdays, holidays, family events, or moments of personal success? If you've ever found yourself asking “Why can’t they just let me enjoy this?”, this episode is for you.

In this deep-dive episode, we unpack the disturbing reality behind why narcissists can’t stand your joy. Whether it’s your graduation, a promotion, a peaceful family gathering, or simply a quiet moment of contentment, narcissists have a way of inserting chaos, guilt, or drama—ensuring that the spotlight shifts back to them.

We’ll explore:

• The narcissist’s pathological envy and need to undermine you
• How they weaponise special moments to create emotional confusion
• The psychological reason your joy feels threatening to them
• The difference between support and sabotage in toxic dynamics
• Common tactics: disappearing acts, passive-aggressive comments, arguments out of nowhere

“They see your joy as a reminder they can’t feel theirs.”

Narcissistic sabotage isn’t random—it’s a patterned behaviour used to reassert control and destabilise you emotionally. These moments of sabotage are often followed by gaslighting, blame-shifting, or false apologies that keep you questioning yourself and walking on eggshells.

You’ll also hear real-world examples from my counselling practice, helping you identify red flags and understand the deeper emotional manipulation at play.

“They won’t let you have the moment—unless it serves them.”

This episode is a must-listen for anyone who has ever felt emotionally ambushed during what should’ve been their happiest moments. I’ll help you see through the manipulation and take the first steps toward emotional freedom.

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If Fake Love has helped you, using this Apple Podcasts link is a simple way to support the show! 🙏

Disclaimer: This post contains affiliate links. If you make a purchase, I may receive a commission at no extra cost to you.

Need Support, Extra Resources? Resources and Online Counseling (worldwide) information Here

Order my book Fake Love – Understanding and Healing from Narcissistic Abuse here

You can leave a Rating and a Review here

You Can Share this Podcast here

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Thank you for listening!
Please remember the information in this episode is not intended to substitute for therapy is general and strictly the opinions of the host.

Nova xx

They live right next door—but your life feels like a psychological battleground. In this episode of Fake Love and Flying Monkeys, we're diving into one of the most overlooked forms of narcissistic abuse: the narcissistic neighbour from hell.

If you’ve ever had your boundaries trampled, your privacy violated, or your daily peace destroyed by a toxic neighbour, you’re not imagining it—this is real, and you’re not alone.

"It’s not just petty disputes about fences or noise. A narcissistic neighbour plays a much bigger game—the long game of power, control, and psychological warfare."

As a specialist narcissistic abuse counsellor, I sharethe red flags, manipulation tactics, and deeply distressing psychological games these neighbours play—from covert sabotage to blatant intimidation. Whether it’s smear campaigns in the street, passive-aggressive “niceness,” or constant efforts to provoke you, this episode gives you both validation and strategy.

We’ll explore:

Why narcissistic neighbours target certain people

How they use neighbourhood dynamics to isolate and smear you

The emotional toll of living next to narcissistic chaos

What NOT to do (and why reacting fuels them)

Boundaries, grey rocking, and legal strategies that protect your peace

"You don’t have to justify your need for peace, safety, or space—especially not to someone who thrives on taking it away."

Whether you’re dealing with noise complaints used as weapons, creepy surveillance, or subtle community manipulation, this episode will help you reclaim your power and sanity.

Need Support, Extra Resources? Resources and Online Counseling (worldwide) information Here

Order my book Fake Love – Understanding and Healing from Narcissistic Abuse here

You can leave a Rating and a Review here

You Can Share this Podcast here

Join me on FB here
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Please Buy me a coffee ❤️

Thank you for listening!
Please remember the information in this episode is not intended to substitute for therapy is general and strictly the opinions of the host.

Nova xx

They poke the bear—then cry victim when the bear roars.

In this episode of Fake Love and Flying Monkeys, I’m pulling back the curtain on one of the most manipulative narcissistic abuse tactics out there—narcissist baiting and bashing. If you’ve ever been provoked, poked, or pushed to your emotional limit by a narcissist only to have your reaction twisted against you, this episode is for you.

We’re diving deep into how narcissists bait you, why they do it, and how it connects to their larger smear campaign strategy. I’ll walk you through the red flags of baiting—those sly jabs, passive-aggressive comments, and guilt-tripping setups that are meant to elicit a strong emotional reaction. Once you take the bait, the narcissist flips the script, painting you as unstable, aggressive, or even abusive—this is what I call the narcissist’s bash phase.

“They want you to break—so they can blame you.”

In this episode, you’ll learn:

What narcissistic baiting looks like in romantic, family, workplace, and co-parenting dynamics

The emotional and reputational damage that occurs when you react

How baiting is often the first step in a calculated smear campaign

Why staying silent, not stooping, and emotionally detaching is your greatest defence

Grounded strategies to protect your peace and reputation

How to reframe your mindset so you stop reacting and start reclaiming power

Whether you're co-parenting with a narcissist, working with one, or trying to disengage from a toxic ex, knowing how to spot narcissist baiting before you take the hook is essential for your healing and safety.

Need Support, Extra Resources? Resources and Online Counseling (worldwide) information Here

Order my book Fake Love – Understanding and Healing from Narcissistic Abuse here

You can leave a Rating and a Review here

You Can Share this Podcast here

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Please Buy me a coffee ❤️

Thank you for listening!
Please remember the information in this episode is not intended to substitute for therapy is general and strictly the opinions of the host.

Nova xx

Are you constantly second-guessing yourself, walking on eggshells, or feeling like you're going crazy in a relationship? 

You may be experiencing narcissistic victim syndrome—a deeply damaging psychological response to ongoing emotional and psychological manipulation by a narcissist.

In this eye-opening episode of Fake Love and Flying Monkeys, I break down exactly what narcissistic Victim syndrome is, how it develops, and the red flags you should never ignore. As a trauma-informed counsellor who specialises in narcissistic abuse recovery, I’ll guide you through the real signs of narcissistic abuse and Narcissistic  Victim Syndrome, and help you understand the emotional rollercoaster that victims often experience—confusion, anxiety, hypervigilance, low self-worth, and trauma bonding.

Whether it's a narcissistic partner, parent, friend, or boss, this episode will help you identify the manipulative tactics narcissists use—like gaslighting, love bombing, intermittent reinforcement, and devaluation—that leave you emotionally drained and psychologically trapped.

In this episode, we’ll cover:

What narcissistic Victim syndrome really is

Common signs you're being emotionally abused by a narcissist

How narcissistic abuse affects your mental health and identity

Why victims stay and how trauma bonding forms

Steps to begin healing and reclaiming your sense of self

Narcissistic abuse isn’t always obvious—but its effects are long-lasting and real. If you've ever been made to feel like you're the problem, this episode will validate your experience and give you the clarity and language to understand what’s really happening.

Support the Show on Apple Podcasts
If Fake Love has helped you, using this Apple Podcasts link is a simple way to support the show! 🙏

Disclaimer: This post contains affiliate links. If you make a purchase, I may receive a commission at no extra cost to you.

Need Support, Extra Resources? Resources and Online Counseling (worldwide) information Here

Order my book Fake Love – Understanding and Healing from Narcissistic Abuse here

You can leave a Rating and a Review here

You Can Share this Podcast here

Join me on FB here
Join the private FB group here
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Thank you for listening!
Please remember the information in this episode is not intended to substitute for therapy is general and strictly the opinions of the host.

Nova xx

By the time you realise what’s happening, you’re no longer you.

In this eye-opening episode I dive deep into how covert narcissists slowly chip away at, and dismantle your personality, piece by piece.

We’re talking about the subtle manipulation tactics that don’t leave bruises but completely rewrite who you are:

Why covert narcissists target your self-esteem and independence

How they use gaslighting, guilt, and fake concern to erode your confidence

What it feels like when your values, beliefs, and even your sense of humour no longer feel like your own

How survivors often don’t recognise themselves anymore

“You’re not ‘too sensitive’—you’re being conditioned to question your reality.”

Whether the narcissist is a partner, parent, colleague, or friend, the long-term psychological effects of narcissistic abuse are real—and they’re devastating. This episode explores how your core identity is gradually overwritten by a covert narcissist’s control.

“Their goal isn’t to love you—it’s to control who you become.”

If you’ve ever felt like a shell of your former self, or like your personality has been “trained out” of you, this episode will help you make sense of the confusion, reclaim your identity, and start the healing process.

Need Support, Extra Resources? Resources and Online Counseling (worldwide) information Here

Order my book Fake Love – Understanding and Healing from Narcissistic Abuse here

You can leave a Rating and a Review here

You Can Share this Podcast here

Join me on FB here
Join the private FB group here
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Please Buy me a coffee ❤️

Thank you for listening!
Please remember the information in this episode is not intended to substitute for therapy is general and strictly the opinions of the host.

Nova xx

What if everything you thought you knew about narcissists was just the tip of the iceberg?

In this eye-opening episode of Fake Love and Flying Monkeys, I’m revealing 10 of the darkest, most tightly kept secrets narcissists don’t want you to uncover—because once you know, their power starts to crumble.

"A narcissist’s greatest fear is exposure. The moment you see through their mask, the game changes."

These are the secrets they use to:

Manipulate your perception of reality

Keep you hooked through cycles of idealisation and devaluation

Pretend to be the victim while destroying your reputation

And maintain control long after you’ve walked away

Whether you're dealing with a narcissistic partner, parent, co-worker, or friend, this episode will equip you with the insights you need to see their behaviour for what it really is.

"They don’t want you to heal. They want you to doubt yourself forever."

Expect to hear the truth behind:

Why they seem so confident (but are actually deeply insecure)

How they mirror you to win your trust

The real reason they never take responsibility

Why their charm is a calculated act

And how their ‘love’ is just another form of control

"The moment you stop playing their game, they panic."

It’s time to take your power back. The more you understand these dark narcissist secrets, the less influence they’ll have over your mind, emotions, and future.

Support the Show on Apple Podcasts
If Fake Love has helped you, using this Apple Podcasts link is a simple way to support the show! 🙏

Disclaimer: This post contains affiliate links. If you make a purchase, I may receive a commission at no extra cost to you.

Need Support, Extra Resources? Resources and Online Counseling (worldwide) information Here

Order my book Fake Love – Understanding and Healing from Narcissistic Abuse here

You can leave a Rating and a Review here

You Can Share this Podcast here

Join me on FB here
Join the private FB group here
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Thank you for listening!
Please remember the information in this episode is not intended to substitute for therapy is general and strictly the opinions of the host.

Nova xx

Why can’t anyone seem to understand narcissistic abuse — no matter how hard you try to explain it? In this validating episode of Fake Love and Flying Monkeys,  I break down why victims struggle to put their experience into words and why outsiders often dismiss, minimise, or misunderstand what’s really happening.

I unpack powerful tactics like gaslighting, love bombing, and covert emotional abuse — all designed by the narcissist to stay hidden from others while destroying you behind closed doors. You’ll learn why survivors are left feeling isolated, disbelieved, and even blamed, and how this adds to the trauma.

If you’ve ever felt crazy, exhausted, or alone trying to explain your abuse — this episode will give you clarity, validation, and support. Your pain is real, and it matters.

Need Support, Extra Resources? Resources and Online Counseling (worldwide) information Here

Order my book Fake Love – Understanding and Healing from Narcissistic Abuse here

You can leave a Rating and a Review here

You Can Share this Podcast here

Join me on FB here
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Thank you for listening!
Please remember the information in this episode is not intended to substitute for therapy is general and strictly the opinions of the host.

Nova xx

In this powerful episode of Fake Love and Flying Monkeys, I’m joined by none other than Dr. Sam Vaknin, the world-renowned expert on narcissistic personality disorder and author of the groundbreaking book Malignant Self-Love: Narcissism Revisited. With over 300,000 YouTube subscribers and millions of views, Dr. Vaknin has become one of the most recognised voices globally on narcissism, drawing from decades of research, clinical observation, and personal experience.

Together, we take a deep dive into the narcissist’s destructive cycle of idealisation, devaluation, and discard — the pattern that leaves victims confused, traumatised, and trapped. Dr. Vaknin explains why narcissists go from love bombing you with intense idealisation, to cruelly tearing you down during the devaluation phase, before abruptly discarding you when they’ve extracted everything they need. You’ll learn the psychology behind this cycle, why it repeats, and most importantly, how to recognise it early and protect yourself from further harm.

Dr. Vaknin brings his signature no-nonsense insight, blending clinical knowledge with raw truth that resonates with survivors around the world. Whether you’re dealing with a narcissistic partner, parent, boss, or friend, this conversation will validate your experience and empower you with practical understanding.

Please follow Dr Sam Vaknin on his YouTube channel at https://youtube.com/@samvaknin?si=9L6UYK8vr63gfIEg

Support the Show on Apple Podcasts
If Fake Love has helped you, using this Apple Podcasts link is a simple way to support the show! 🙏

Disclaimer: This post contains affiliate links. If you make a purchase, I may receive a commission at no extra cost to you.

Need Support, Extra Resources? Resources and Online Counseling (worldwide) information Here

Order my book Fake Love – Understanding and Healing from Narcissistic Abuse here

You can leave a Rating and a Review here

You Can Share this Podcast here

Join me on FB here
Join the private FB group here
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Join me on YouTube here

Please Buy me a coffee ❤️

Thank you for listening!
Please remember the information in this episode is not intended to substitute for therapy is general and strictly the opinions of the host.

Nova xx

Ever wondered how a narcissist loves — or if they’re even capable of real love at all? In this episode of Fake Love and Flying Monkeys  I break down the hard truths about what narcissistic love really looks like in romantic relationships, families, and friendships.

You’ll learn why narcissists appear so loving and affectionate at first with intense love bombing, only to later devalue and discard you. I explain the difference between real love and narcissistic love, and why narcissists make you feel like you're walking on eggshells, doubting yourself, and constantly trying to win back their affection.

We explore how narcissistic parents show conditional love through the golden child and scapegoat dynamic, and why narcissistic partners shift from idealising you to tearing you down with silent treatments, manufactured conflict, and emotional manipulation. I also cover the key signs that you’re dealing with narcissistic love — and how to protect your self-worth and reclaim your peace.

If you’ve ever been stuck in the cycle of confusion, asking yourself, Did they ever really love me? this episode will give you the validation and clarity you need to start healing

Support the Show on Apple Podcasts
If Fake Love has helped you, using this Apple Podcasts link is a simple way to support the show! 🙏

Disclaimer: This post contains affiliate links. If you make a purchase, I may receive a commission at no extra cost to you.

Need Support, Extra Resources? Resources and Online Counseling (worldwide) information Here

Order my book Fake Love – Understanding and Healing from Narcissistic Abuse here

You can leave a Rating and a Review here

You Can Share this Podcast here

Join me on FB here
Join the private FB group here
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Join me on YouTube here

Please Buy me a coffee ❤️

Thank you for listening!
Please remember the information in this episode is not intended to substitute for therapy is general and strictly the opinions of the host.

Nova xx