Freedom from Attachment

Wanting something from someone in attachment at a deeper level and it never happens—perhaps for a few minutes, but it is never consistent.

Waiting for a train that never shows up. Like a secret hope or believing this person has some sort of gift to give you. It never comes. Even if it does come it doesn't fix it. The emptiness is still there and usually, because we choose what will not fill us, we feel worse—we feel invalidated. We have that idea that we are not enough or good enough—some limiting belief, which we are trying to prove true…a belief that invalidates us as a person.

We cause all of our own grief, but believe it is the outside circumstances which make us feel invalidated. Only you can do that for yourself.

None of this has nothing to do with logic. It is wanting either what I can't have or it's having a situation in which there is little progress—you count breadcrumbs as progress and you believe its the other person holding back, you don’t think you’re part of what is creating the feeling inside.

Leading to the feeling of wanting to grab onto them and bring them closer, when deep down you would freak if they did get closer….its much easier to find validation that you are not okay, that something is wrong with you and just by having this relationship it satisfies the case you’ve built against yourself.

Wanting something from someone in attachment at a deeper level and it never happens—perhaps for a few minutes, but it is never consistent.

Waiting for a train that never shows up. Like a secret hope or believing this person has some sort of gift to give you. It never comes. Even if it does come it doesn't fix it. The emptiness is still there and usually, because we choose what will not fill us, we feel worse—we feel invalidated. We have that idea that we are not enough or good enough—some limiting belief, which we are trying to prove true…a belief that invalidates us as a person.

We cause all of our own grief, but believe it is the outside circumstances which make us feel invalidated. Only you can do that for yourself.

None of this has nothing to do with logic. It is wanting either what I can't have or it's having a situation in which there is little progress—you count breadcrumbs as progress and you believe its the other person holding back, you don’t think you’re part of what is creating the feeling inside.

Leading to the feeling of wanting to grab onto them and bring them closer, when deep down you would freak if they did get closer….its much easier to find validation that you are not okay, that something is wrong with you and just by having this relationship it satisfies the case you’ve built against yourself.

Wanting something from someone in attachment at a deeper level and it never happens—perhaps for a few minutes, but it is never consistent.

Waiting for a train that never shows up. Like a secret hope or believing this person has some sort of gift to give you. It never comes. Even if it does come it doesn't fix it. The emptiness is still there and usually, because we choose what will not fill us, we feel worse—we feel invalidated. We have that idea that we are not enough or good enough—some limiting belief, which we are trying to prove true…a belief that invalidates us as a person.

We cause all of our own grief, but believe it is the outside circumstances which make us feel invalidated. Only you can do that for yourself.

None of this has nothing to do with logic. It is wanting either what I can't have or it's having a situation in which there is little progress—you count breadcrumbs as progress and you believe its the other person holding back, you don’t think you’re part of what is creating the feeling inside.

Leading to the feeling of wanting to grab onto them and bring them closer, when deep down you would freak if they did get closer….its much easier to find validation that you are not okay, that something is wrong with you and just by having this relationship it satisfies the case you’ve built against yourself.

Wanting something from someone in attachment at a deeper level and it never happens—perhaps for a few minutes, but it is never consistent.

Waiting for a train that never shows up. Like a secret hope or believing this person has some sort of gift to give you. It never comes. Even if it does come it doesn't fix it. The emptiness is still there and usually, because we choose what will not fill us, we feel worse—we feel invalidated. We have that idea that we are not enough or good enough—some limiting belief, which we are trying to prove true…a belief that invalidates us as a person.

We cause all of our own grief, but believe it is the outside circumstances which make us feel invalidated. Only you can do that for yourself.

None of this has nothing to do with logic. It is wanting either what I can't have or it's having a situation in which there is little progress—you count breadcrumbs as progress and you believe its the other person holding back, you don’t think you’re part of what is creating the feeling inside.

Leading to the feeling of wanting to grab onto them and bring them closer, when deep down you would freak if they did get closer….its much easier to find validation that you are not okay, that something is wrong with you and just by having this relationship it satisfies the case you’ve built against yourself.

Most of us have a picture in our head of what we want our lives to be, and we judge our reality (good or bad) according to that picture. We want the universe—or someone or something—to fix what we consider “bad,” not realizing it’s our perception that makes it so. When life doesn’t match our picture, we feel crappy and unfulfilled, so we implore the universe to give us what we want. That’s the law of attraction, right? Perhaps you want to be married, but get angry when none of your online matches check your boxes. Being so fixated on how you think that person will look or where they will show up may result in you looking right past them.

If you want the law of attraction to work, stop asking for what you need exactly how you need it, and try surrendering. Toss out the picture you’ve used to compare and judge yourself. It doesn’t serve you. Instead of blaming the universe for not delivering what you ask for, trust that it will bring you what you need. It may not come the way you expect, but you’ll end up with more of what you TRULY want. Go all in and start by surrendering to love. Ditch the checklist and you’ll find that your life and your happiness are readily available to you. Just trust and let go…

Most of us have a picture in our head of what we want our lives to be, and we judge our reality (good or bad) according to that picture. We want the universe—or someone or something—to fix what we consider “bad,” not realizing it’s our perception that makes it so. When life doesn’t match our picture, we feel crappy and unfulfilled, so we implore the universe to give us what we want. That’s the law of attraction, right? Perhaps you want to be married, but get angry when none of your online matches check your boxes. Being so fixated on how you think that person will look or where they will show up may result in you looking right past them.

If you want the law of attraction to work, stop asking for what you need exactly how you need it, and try surrendering. Toss out the picture you’ve used to compare and judge yourself. It doesn’t serve you. Instead of blaming the universe for not delivering what you ask for, trust that it will bring you what you need. It may not come the way you expect, but you’ll end up with more of what you TRULY want. Go all in and start by surrendering to love. Ditch the checklist and you’ll find that your life and your happiness are readily available to you. Just trust and let go…

Most of us have a picture in our head of what we want our lives to be, and we judge our reality (good or bad) according to that picture. We want the universe—or someone or something—to fix what we consider “bad,” not realizing it’s our perception that makes it so. When life doesn’t match our picture, we feel crappy and unfulfilled, so we implore the universe to give us what we want. That’s the law of attraction, right? Perhaps you want to be married, but get angry when none of your online matches check your boxes. Being so fixated on how you think that person will look or where they will show up may result in you looking right past them.

If you want the law of attraction to work, stop asking for what you need exactly how you need it, and try surrendering. Toss out the picture you’ve used to compare and judge yourself. It doesn’t serve you. Instead of blaming the universe for not delivering what you ask for, trust that it will bring you what you need. It may not come the way you expect, but you’ll end up with more of what you TRULY want. Go all in and start by surrendering to love. Ditch the checklist and you’ll find that your life and your happiness are readily available to you. Just trust and let go…

Most of us have a picture in our head of what we want our lives to be, and we judge our reality (good or bad) according to that picture. We want the universe—or someone or something—to fix what we consider “bad,” not realizing it’s our perception that makes it so. When life doesn’t match our picture, we feel crappy and unfulfilled, so we implore the universe to give us what we want. That’s the law of attraction, right? Perhaps you want to be married, but get angry when none of your online matches check your boxes. Being so fixated on how you think that person will look or where they will show up may result in you looking right past them.

If you want the law of attraction to work, stop asking for what you need exactly how you need it, and try surrendering. Toss out the picture you’ve used to compare and judge yourself. It doesn’t serve you. Instead of blaming the universe for not delivering what you ask for, trust that it will bring you what you need. It may not come the way you expect, but you’ll end up with more of what you TRULY want. Go all in and start by surrendering to love. Ditch the checklist and you’ll find that your life and your happiness are readily available to you. Just trust and let go…

To be in the present moment we need to accept what is. Not what we want the situation to be or how we would prefer to feel, but what is ACTUALLY going on right now. That’s very hard to do when attached to someone because we tend to live in a fantasy where things are the way we want them to be, and we act from that place, instead of how we actually feel according to reality. Non-acceptance keeps us stuck because we’re focused on the perceived problem (usually created by our thoughts) about the other person rather than the solution. Then we put ourselves down when we can’t move past it, which pushes us even further away from acceptance. It’s exhausting when what we want and what we have are two different things, but through accepting reality, we’re able to let go and focus on creating more of what we say we want.

What is an example of non-acceptance? Attaching to the idea that the person you’re with is a match because there are some really amazing things, even though red flags to the contrary abound. We avoid reality because we want to avoid the truth and all the feelings associated (disappointment, abandonment, loneliness, judgment, etc.). When we DO accept and allow those uncomfortable emotions, it enables us to move through it rather than staying stuck in denial. Fantasizing and wanting more where there clearly is no more keeps us stuck, while allowing us to dabble in reality. If things are ever going to change, it must begin with acceptance.

To be in the present moment we need to accept what is. Not what we want the situation to be or how we would prefer to feel, but what is ACTUALLY going on right now. That’s very hard to do when attached to someone because we tend to live in a fantasy where things are the way we want them to be, and we act from that place, instead of how we actually feel according to reality. Non-acceptance keeps us stuck because we’re focused on the perceived problem (usually created by our thoughts) about the other person rather than the solution. Then we put ourselves down when we can’t move past it, which pushes us even further away from acceptance. It’s exhausting when what we want and what we have are two different things, but through accepting reality, we’re able to let go and focus on creating more of what we say we want.

What is an example of non-acceptance? Attaching to the idea that the person you’re with is a match because there are some really amazing things, even though red flags to the contrary abound. We avoid reality because we want to avoid the truth and all the feelings associated (disappointment, abandonment, loneliness, judgment, etc.). When we DO accept and allow those uncomfortable emotions, it enables us to move through it rather than staying stuck in denial. Fantasizing and wanting more where there clearly is no more keeps us stuck, while allowing us to dabble in reality. If things are ever going to change, it must begin with acceptance.