Hopestream: Parenting Kids Through Addiction & Mental Health

ABOUT THE EPISODE:
At the time Julie’s teenage son began misusing drugs, she had been a clinical psychologist specializing in addiction for more than 15 years. In her own words:

“I know most of what there is to know, and we’re still here anyway. How did that happen?”

After working with families in the area of addiction for years, Julie was now one of “those parents.” This personal experience layered onto her academic expertise gives her a unique, holistic perspective that can benefit us all. 

Join us for this incredibly vulnerable and enlightening conversation, where we discuss:

• the difference between an intellectual understanding of substance misuse and the emotional, first-person experience
• why Julie was resistant to wilderness therapy – and why she’s glad she tried it
• and how to react when it seems like C.R.A.F.T. tools “aren’t working”

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Watch the podcast on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

ABOUT THE EPISODE:
Having a child who misuses drugs or alcohol can look very different for all of us – especially for children of different ages.  For parents of kids who are still living at home, the responsibilities and realities are simply not the same as parents whose children are young adults, living on their own outside the home.

In today’s coaching episode, my guest Tracey tells us how her 26-year-old son finally accepted treatment just a few months ago, after more than a decade of alcohol misuse.  Tracey is still learning how to strike that balance between support and control, and how to let go of the downward spiral of anxiety about her son’s relapse that, I’m sure, so many of us can relate to.

In this episode we discuss:

• how Tracey finally came to understand why her son began drinking so many years ago
• how she has made so much progress toward her goal of relinquishing control of her son’s life, and what she might still do to improve
• and a few tips and tricks to staying grounded – from a “letter of resignation” to ice cube handling

EPISODE RESOURCES:

• Aware RecoveryCare (in-home detox services)

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Watch the podcast on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

ABOUT THE EPISODE:
I’m always happy to share testimony from individuals in recovery. Their stories can give hope and perspective to families of young people currently working through substance misuse and treatment.

The stories I’ve previously shared have almost always been from people in recovery for a decade or more. Those interviews are, of course, valuable, but they’ve also been conducted in distant hindsight of the experiences that many families listening to this podcast are going through today.

In this episode, I’m speaking with Spencer, a 22-year-old who is now one year in recovery, has a full-time job, and maintains a healthy relationship with his family. Spencer began experimenting with alcohol and marijuana at age 14, eventually moving on to regular doses of hallucinogens that began to disconnect him from reality. His journey includes adolescent treatment, multiple relapses, homelessness, drug-induced psychosis and now, a new life.

His experiences with drugs, alcohol and treatment are not only fresh in his memory but also unfiltered and, at times, raw.

Join us as Spencer bravely offers a fresh perspective that may illuminate important aspects of your own child’s struggles and successes.

EPISODE RESOURCES:

• Benchmark Transitions
• Find an AA or NA meeting

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Watch the podcast on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

ABOUT THE EPISODE:
In this episode, I share the reason behind my passion for helping parents navigate this stressful season of life and share eight important, free, and available ways of being that will help your child become more motivated to change their relationship with substances.

I spend a lot of time talking with professional experts and parent-experts - those of you living with and parenting young people who misuse substances. I recently took some time to reverse-engineer the things I've heard consistently that helped make the experience better and that have helped kids move faster through this period in life.

What I found in the process were eight nuggets of wisdom and insight that you can start implementing today - and we need to act quickly because our young people are dying at an unprecedented rate. 

As a precursor to the eight insights, I share recent statistics about teenage overdose deaths in the U.S. to emphasize why I'm so passionate about bringing parents more tools, skills, and knowledge when their child misuses substances.

EPISODE RESOURCES:

• Teen overdose statistics
• Hopestream podcast episodes mentioned: #3, #136, #151, #17
• Center for Motivation and Change
• Beyond Addiction, How Science and Kindness Help People Change

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Watch the podcast on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

ABOUT THE EPISODE:
For many parents, having their teen or young adult child undergo psychological evaluation can feel incredibly stressful. They worry that even talking to their son or daughter about the process can make it seem like they think their child is broken, or maybe even that they're crazy.

When my son entered wilderness therapy, I'd never even heard of psychological evaluations - so I never knew it could have been a tool to provide insight into his challenges and strengths. 

And for parents taking a “wait-and-see” approach to addressing their child’s behavior, these evaluations can be beneficial to get a thorough and professional assessment of your child’s psychological strengths, weaknesses, and specific needs. This information can be critical and directive when you're making treatment decisions.

My guest today is Dr. Alison LaFollette, a psychologist based in Salt Lake City with over a decade of experience conducting psychological and neuropsychological assessments. The last seven years of her career have involved working with young people in residential treatment programs, therapeutic boarding schools, and wilderness therapy programs. Given her extensive education and experience, she has a lot to share with us about how evaluations can benefit families with young people who struggle with substances and mental health.

In this episode, Alison and I discuss:

• Myths and misperceptions about psychological assessment
• Who’s qualified to conduct these assessments, and who isn’t 
• Ideas for approaching your child about doing an evaluation
• How test results can be used to direct treatment options

EPISODE RESOURCES:

• Alison LaFollette's website: lifeelevatedpsychological.com 
• Hopestream podcast episode 79 with Virginia Holleman on insurance for behavioral healthcare coverage

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Watch the podcast on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

ABOUT THE EPISODE:
The experience of parenting a child in, or transitioning out of, treatment almost always feels like uncharted territory. And for each of us as individuals, it usually is.

But what if there was a way to zoom out and find patterns within thousands of family experiences? With that insight, we might even be able to predict situations we find ourselves in and prepare appropriately.  

My guests today have done just that.  Hillary Moses and Jen Murphy have a combined 40 years of experience working with kids in treatment and their families.  They are co-owners of Solutions Parenting Support, and authors of the new book H.O.M.E.: Strategies for making home a SUCCESS, during and after treatment.

H.O.M.E. is not just a guidebook to chart the territory you’re in or heading toward. It’s also an thoughtful model to sustain personal growth during an incredibly difficult time.

In this conversation we cover:

• behavior patterns of kids in recovery
• a simple model to apply when you're faced with a situation you don't know how to handle
• navigating boundaries and self-ownership for kids 18+
• and how the self-assessment questions provided by the H.O.M.E. model can keep us grounded and in control.

EPISODE RESOURCES:

• Solutions Parenting Support

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Watch the podcast on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

ABOUT THE EPISODE:
A common feeling parents express when they have a child struggling with substance misuse or addiction is helplessness. It feels as though day-to-day events whiplash you around, and there's nothing you can do to help create stability or calm - let alone encourage your child to accept help. 

The good news is there are ways to wield great influence in your home, with your child who struggles, and in your relationships in general. In this candid conversation with my business partner Cathy, we talk about how parents can begin to take back some control and positively influence what's happening. It's empowering and uplifting, and we go on a tangent or two, as usual when we're talking to each other.

You'll hear:

• why we shouldn't wait till everything is "right" to enjoy our kids and life in general
• why it's totally normal to feel knocked over when your child is misusing substances
• when is the worst time to engage with your child
• our point of view on rock bottom
• a spolier alert if you're using the yell, blame, punish, restrict approach
• thoughts on kids who "just" use marijuana and harm reduction
• why Cathy wants you to go to a marijuana dispensary
• what you're 100% in control of

EPISODE RESOURCES:

• Huberman Labs Podcast on the effects of cannabis and marijuana on the brain and body
• The Marijuana episode on Hopestream with Dr. Nzinga Harrison
• Stages of Change podcast episode on Hopestream
• Two Sparrows in a Hurricane - Tanya Tucker

Research on parent’s influence: According to Marlowe et al. (1996), substance abusers reported that family members exerted substantially more influence over their decision to enter treatment than other sources of influence, including legal pressures exerted by court-mandated treatment. Research has also shown that family members and significant others can be important resources in treating drug abuse (Azrin, 1976; Garrett et al., 1997; McGillicuddy, Rychtarik, Duquette, & Morsheimer, 2001; O'Farrell & Fals-Stewart, 2003; Sisson & Azrin, 1986; Szapocznik, Kurtines, Foote, Perez-Vidal, & Hervis, 1983; Thomas & Santa, 1982).  

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Watch the podcast on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

ABOUT THE EPISODE:
Sometimes, parents seeking guidance and comfort during difficult times are told to “choose happiness”.  My guest today believes instead, we should be choosing joy.

Alex Stavros is the CEO of Embark Behavioral Health, a leading network of premiere youth outpatient centers and residential programs.  Their “big hairy audacious goal” is driving down youth anxiety, depression, and suicide from the all-time highs of today to all-time lows by 2028.

In addition to his decade of work with Embark, Alex brings some unique personal experiences to the conversation.  As a child, his family uprooted their lives in Minnesota to serve people living in abject poverty in the slums of Peru.  This upbringing has given him some much-needed perspective on happiness, joy, and how each applies to the lives of families struggling with substance misuse issues.

In this episode, we discuss:

• the difference between happiness and joy - and why it matters to parents in particular
• how Embark is using this concept to change lives
• and the three major challenges to fixing the nation’s mental health crisis

EPISODE RESOURCES:

• Embark Behavioral Health

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Watch the podcast on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

ABOUT THE EPISODE:
If you’re here listening to Hopestream, you probably know that working through substance misuse can take a heavy toll on family relationships.  Even after a child achieves sobriety, family dynamics are sometimes still disrupted by  the intensely  emotional process everyone has been through.

In this coaching episode, I’ll meet Alana, a Stream Community parent whose oldest daughter is now 11 months sober.  Alana has watched her struggle — especially during the first two years of COVID — with devastating  bouts of depression and anxiety, which have twice been made worse by personal traumas.

Alana is optimistic about her daughter’s sobriety, but she’s  still navigating those mental health issues. She wants her to be stable and independent but can’t seem to stop trying to “fix” her daughter’s life with a never-ending to-do list and nagging. In this episode, Alana and I work through:

• How she can encourage  good, sober choices by her daughter - without nagging her
• Recognizing progress and the importance of positive reinforcement
  how self-care changes the way our children see us
• and what I did wrong that pushed my son to continue his substance use 

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Watch the podcast on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

ABOUT THE EPISODE:
Numerous studies show that adopted children are significantly more likely to develop substance use disorders. Is this true? If so, why? And how can parents of adopted children support and guide them through those tendencies?

Today I’m speaking with Eric Fawson. Eric has been practicing therapy for more than 15 years, focusing on attachment, trauma, and the substance misuse that often accompanies these issues. He has served as a Clinical Director and is currently a therapist at Elements Wilderness. Eric was also adopted at birth and has worked with countless adoptees, making him particularly qualified to talk about the unique challenges facing adoptive parents.

In this discussion, we’ll be exploring:

• why adopted children may struggle with addiction
• how parents’ state of mind can affect discussions about substance use
• and why it’s so important to be part of a community that understands what you’re going through as a parent with a child experimenting with or misusing substances

EPISODE RESOURCES:

• TCA - Therapeutic Consulting Assoc. 
• IECA - Independent Educational Consultants Assoc. 
• Allkindsoftherapy.com

Books:

• 20 Things Adopted Kids Wish Their Adoptive Parents Knew (Sherrie Eldridge )
• The Primal Wound (Nancy Newton Verrier)
• Being Adopted (Amy Wilkerson Lcsw)
• The Family of Adoption (Joyce Maguire Pavao)

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Watch the podcast on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.