Why is story work absolutely essential for men outgrowing porn? In part 2 of this 4 part series, Chris Inman shares his story: "The Lonely Walk."

If you love story work, you'd love Husband Material Groups.

Apply to join a group at husbandmaterial.com/group

Drew Boa (MA, PSAP) is a Certified Unwanted Guide and Inner Child Recovery Specialist. Drew is the founder of Husband Material, where he helps men outgrow porn. Learn more at husbandmaterial.com

Wendell Moss (MA, LMHC) is a therapist, lead instructor, and facilitator at The Allender Center. Wendell serves as adjunct faculty at The Seattle School Of Theology & Psychology. Email Wendell at [email protected]

Marcus Spaur is a Certified Husband Material Coach, Inner Child Recovery Specialist, and CCAR Coach. Marcus is the founder of Between The Covers Coaching. Learn more at betweenthecoverscoaching.com

Chris Inman (M.Div, PSAP) is a Certified Unwanted Guide and Certified Professional Recovery Coach. Chris is the founder of Porn-Free Masculinity. Email Chris at [email protected]

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Take the Husband Material Journey...

• Step 1: Listen to this podcast or watch on YouTube
• Step 2: Join the private Husband Material Community
• Step 3: Take the free mini-course: How To Outgrow Porn
• Step 4: Try the all-in-one program: Husband Material Academy

Thanks for listening!

What is story work? Where did it come from? What does it look like? In part 1 of this 4-part series, Drew shares his story: "The Day I Got Braces."

If you love this series, you'd love Husband Material Groups.

Apply to join a group at husbandmaterial.com/group

Drew Boa (MA, PSAP) is a Certified Unwanted Guide and Inner Child Recovery Specialist. Drew is the founder of Husband Material, where he helps men outgrow porn. Learn more at husbandmaterial.com

Wendell Moss (MA, LMHC) is a therapist, lead instructor, and facilitator at The Allender Center. Wendell serves as adjunct faculty at The Seattle School Of Theology & Psychology. Email Wendell at [email protected]

Marcus Spaur is a Certified Husband Material Coach, Inner Child Recovery Specialist, and CCAR Coach. Marcus is the founder of Between The Covers Coaching. Learn more at betweenthecoverscoaching.com

Chris Inman (M.Div, PSAP) is a Certified Unwanted Guide and Certified Professional Recovery Coach. Chris is the founder of Porn-Free Masculinity. Email Chris at [email protected]

Resources for Story Work:

• The Allender Center and Allender Theory (organization, podcast, courses)
• Unwanted: How Sexual Brokenness Reveals Our Way To Healing, by Jay Stringer (book)
• Redeeming Heartache, with Cathy Loerzel (video)
• The Place We Find Ourselves, by Adam Young (podcast)
• The ReStory Course, by Restory Counseling (video course)

Support the show

Take the Husband Material Journey...

• Step 1: Listen to this podcast or watch on YouTube
• Step 2: Join the private Husband Material Community
• Step 3: Take the free mini-course: How To Outgrow Porn
• Step 4: Try the all-in-one program: Husband Material Academy

Thanks for listening!

What is inner healing prayer, and how can it help men outgrow porn?

This episode is a preview of our new online course, "10 Ways To Heal Your Trauma: Resolving The Roots Of Porn And Sex Addiction." Get free access at healyourtrauma.com

Resources for Inner Healing Prayer:

• Streams of Healing: Finding Your Way to Wholeness with Key Leaders in the Inner Healing Movement, by Cathy Little and Melinda Wilson (book & paid link)
• Introduction To Healing Prayer, with Leslie Weinzettel (podcast)
• Experience Healing Through The Immanuel Approach (podcast)
• Transformation Prayer Ministry (book & organization)
• Listening To Immanuel (PDF worksheet for journaling)

Support the show

Take the Husband Material Journey...

• Step 1: Listen to this podcast or watch on YouTube
• Step 2: Join the private Husband Material Community
• Step 3: Take the free mini-course: How To Outgrow Porn
• Step 4: Try the all-in-one program: Husband Material Academy

Thanks for listening!

What is Polyvagal Theory? How can it help men outgrow porn? John Kilmer skillfully describes the autonomic nervous system and how to (re)shape it in order to experience regulation without unwanted sexual behavior.

John Kilmer is a Mental Health Life Coach, Occupational Therapist, and Certified Husband Material Coach. John has completed the Foundations of Polyvagal Informed Practice Clinical Training Series with Deb Dana. He's a grateful follower of Jesus who is passionate about men's inner healing work. Learn more about John at relaxedcaregiver.com.

This episode is a preview of our new online course, "10 Ways To Heal Your Trauma: Resolving The Roots Of Porn And Sex Addiction." Get free access at healyourtrauma.com

Books on Polyvagal Theory (these are paid links):

• Anchored, by Deb Dana
• Polyvagal Theory in Therapy, by Deb Dana
• The Pocket Guide To The Polyvagal Theory, by Dr. Stephen Porges

Support the show

Take the Husband Material Journey...

• Step 1: Listen to this podcast or watch on YouTube
• Step 2: Join the private Husband Material Community
• Step 3: Take the free mini-course: How To Outgrow Porn
• Step 4: Try the all-in-one program: Husband Material Academy

Thanks for listening!

We need a theology of trauma. In this episode, Matt Wenger powerfully invites us to view our trauma through the lens of Jesus's life, death, and resurrection. This episode is a preview of our new online course at healyourtrauma.com

Matt Wenger is the clinical director of Boulder Recovery, a 14-day intensive for Christian men struggling with sex, porn, and relationship issues. Boulder Recovery uses the TINSA treatment model (Trauma-Induced Sexual Addiction) to heal the traumatic experiences and attachment wounds driving addictive behaviors and problematic thinking around sex and intimacy.

EXCITING ANNOUNCEMENT: Today, Matt Wenger and Drew Boa are releasing a new free online course called "10 Ways To Heal Your Trauma: Resolving The Roots Of Porn And Sex Addiction." Get free access at healyourtrauma.com

Support the show

Take the Husband Material Journey...

• Step 1: Listen to this podcast or watch on YouTube
• Step 2: Join the private Husband Material Community
• Step 3: Take the free mini-course: How To Outgrow Porn
• Step 4: Try the all-in-one program: Husband Material Academy

Thanks for listening!

Do you long for connection, but it feels impossible? In this episode, you'll learn extremely simple tools and techniques to create connection in any conversation—using your eyes, face, voice, and words.

Helpful phrases:

• Tell me more…
• What’s it like for you...
• How does that affect you?
• That makes sense (because)...
• It sounds like / I hear you saying…
• It seems like something shifted…
• That stood out to me…

Resources mentioned (including paid links):

• Attunement: The Key To Connection, podcast by Drew Boa
• The Polyvagal Theory in Therapy, book by Deb Dana
• Man Cards: Conversation Starters For Men
• Dear Young Married Couple Card Decks

Support the show

Take the Husband Material Journey...

• Step 1: Listen to this podcast or watch on YouTube
• Step 2: Join the private Husband Material Community
• Step 3: Take the free mini-course: How To Outgrow Porn
• Step 4: Try the all-in-one program: Husband Material Academy

Thanks for listening!

There are over 40 reasons why men don't talk about their sexual abuse. Let's break the silence. In this episode hosted by Mike Chapman and Doug Carpenter, survivors of sexual abuse share vulnerable stories of harm and healing.

Mike Chapman is a Certified Husband Material Coach and the leader of the HM fellowship for survivors of sexual abuse. Contact Mike at polarlifeconsulting.com/contact

Check out Mike's new podcast: Healing For Male Survivors

• Listen on Apple
• Listen on Spotify

Dr. Doug Carpenter is a Licensed Clinical Psychologist, Certified Husband Material Coach, and the author of Secret Shame: A Survivor's Guide To Understanding Male Sexual Abuse And Male Sexual Development. Learn more at douglascarpenter.com

Husband Material episodes about sexual abuse:

• Was I Sexually Abused? (with Dr. Doug Carpenter)
• Sexual Arousal vs. Sexual Desire (with Dr. Doug Carpenter)
• Healing From Sexual Abuse, Part 1 (with Mike Chapman)
• Healing From Sexual Abuse, Part 2 (with Mike Chapman)
• Porn As Re-Enactment Of Sexual Abuse (with Wendell Moss)
• Rags To Riches To Ruin To Redemption (with Dr. Joe Martin)
• Male Survivors of Sexual Abuse (with Dr. Doug Carpenter and Mike Chapman)

Resources mentioned (including paid links):

• 1in6.org - helpful website
• MenHealing.org - helpful website
• MaleSurvivor.org - helpful website
• Secret Shame: A Survivor's Guide To Understanding Male Sexual Abuse And Male Sexual Development - book by Dr. Doug Carpenter
• Bent On Men: A Memoir On Taboo Feelings, Fraternal Curiosity, And Faith - book by Harrison Bly
• Unchained Memories: True Stories Of Traumatic Memories Lost And Found - book by Lenore Terr
• Scouts Honor - documentary

Support the show

Take the Husband Material Journey...

• Step 1: Listen to this podcast or watch on YouTube
• Step 2: Join the private Husband Material Community
• Step 3: Take the free mini-course: How To Outgrow Porn
• Step 4: Try the all-in-one program: Husband Material Academy

Thanks for listening!

What is full disclosure? When, why, and how should I reveal sexual secrets to my wife? In this episode, disclosure experts Dan Drake and Janice Caudill walk us through the process of full therapeutic disclosure from beginning to end. You'll learn how to restore truth in your relationship in a way that is healing rather than harmful.

Dan Drake and Dr. Janice Caudill co-founded Kintsugi Recovery Partners and co-authored 5 books in the Full Disclosure Series. They developed the first full disclosure training and certification course, and they provide the highest level of support for professionals using their Restoring Truth Model. Learn more at kintsugirecoverypartners.com

Dan Drake is the Founder and Clinical Director of Banyan Therapy Group in Los Angeles, California. He is a Certified Clinical Partner Specialist Supervisor and a Certified Sex Addiction Therapist Supervisor. Dan is a Christian, a husband, and a father.

Dr. Janice Caudill is an APSATS supervisor, CSAT supervisor, Certified Partner Trauma Therapist supervisor, Certified Partner Betrayal Trauma Therapist, Certified Intimacy Anorexia Therapist, and Somatic Experiencing Practitioner. She is the Founder of Intensive Recovery Healing and Intensive Recovery Coaching. Learn more at intensivehope.com

Buy Dan and Janice's books! (these are paid links)

For you (the blue books):

• Full Disclosure: How To Share The Truth After Sexual Betrayal
• Your Disclosure Document: A 10-Step Guide

For your partner (the green books):

• Full Disclosure: How Disclosure Can Help You Heal (part 1)
• Full Disclosure: Preparing For Disclosure On Your Terms (part 2)
• Full Disclosure: Post Disclosure Healing (part 3)

Support the show

Take the Husband Material Journey...

• Step 1: Listen to this podcast or watch on YouTube
• Step 2: Join the private Husband Material Community
• Step 3: Take the free mini-course: How To Outgrow Porn
• Step 4: Try the all-in-one program: Husband Material Academy

Thanks for listening!

Your imagination is not bad. Learn the 4 main types of fantasies, how to evaluate the healthiness of a fantasy, and what to do with your healthy/unhealthy fantasies!

Related episodes:

• Sexual Arousal vs. Sexual Desire
• How To Interpret Sexual Fantasies
• How To Analyze A Sexual Fantasy
• Introduction To Sexual Symbolism
• How My Sexual Fetish Shifted Over Time

Support the show

Take the Husband Material Journey...

• Step 1: Listen to this podcast or watch on YouTube
• Step 2: Join the private Husband Material Community
• Step 3: Take the free mini-course: How To Outgrow Porn
• Step 4: Try the all-in-one program: Husband Material Academy

Thanks for listening!

What is grace, and how does it apply to sexual recovery? Jonathan Daugherty inspiringly explains how grace is not "soft" but the most powerful force for transformation and freedom from porn. Pride, shame, and comparison all melt away under the core truth that you are worth the life of God's son, and that can never change.

Jonathan Daugherty is the founder and president of Be Broken, and founder of the Gateway to Freedom 3-day workshop for men. He also hosts the weekly radio program, Pure Sex Radio. Jonathan lives with his wife and family in San Antonio, Texas.​

Buy Jonathan's books (these are paid links):

• Grace-Based Recovery: A Safe Place to Heal and Grow
• Grace-Based Transformation: The 3-Stage Journey to Wholeness in Christ
• Secrets: A True Story of Addiction, Infidelity and Second Chances

Meet Jonathan, Drew, and other sexual integrity leaders at the 2024 Sexual Integrity Leadership Summit in Colorado Springs, CO!

Support the show

Take the Husband Material Journey...

• Step 1: Listen to this podcast or watch on YouTube
• Step 2: Join the private Husband Material Community
• Step 3: Take the free mini-course: How To Outgrow Porn
• Step 4: Try the all-in-one program: Husband Material Academy

Thanks for listening!