In this weekly Sex and Intimacy Q&A, Tami and Erin Snow answer participant questions about sex, intimacy, addiction, betrayal, and more. They consider timelines in recovery, what full disclosure entails, and how to know if your partner is an addict or just a full-blown jerk, or both. 

TAKEAWAYS:

[:30] Is this seminar only for partners experiencing betrayal? 

[3:55] How do I know if my partner is an addict or just an a**hole? 

[7:25] How should I define my inner circle behaviors after chem sex recovery? 

[12:09] My wife can’t get over my affair, it’s already been 10 months. 

[19:50] Can I trust that my husband suddenly has no urges to act out? 

[27:10] My husband says he’ll tell me anything that I ask him about. Was his disclosure incomplete? 

[31:52] Do you suggest a 12-Step program for the betrayed partner? It’s not my fault! 

[35:55] Can you clarify between a porn addict and a sex/love addict? 

[44:10 How long does recovery take on average? 

[49:19] Can recovery happen without a formal 12-Step program?

RESOURCES:

Seekingintegrity.com

Email Tami: [email protected]

Sexandrelationshiphealing.com

Intherooms.com

Out of the Doghouse: A Step-by-Step Relationship-Saving Guide for Men Caught Cheating, by Robert Weiss

Prodependence: Moving Beyond Codependency, by Robert Weiss

Sex Addiction 101: A Basic Guide to Healing from Sex, Porn, and Love Addiction, by Robert Weiss

Cruise Control: Understanding Sex Addiction in Gay Men, by Robert Weiss

Seeking Integrity Podcasts are produced in partnership with Podfly Productions. 

QUOTES

“She’s not going to believe that you’re not sexually attracted to them when she doesn’t believe anything you say right now.” 

“The action that it takes to rebuild trust takes time.” 

“You may not be enmeshed in your partner’s behavior, but you are deeply involved.” 

“What matters most is the quality of the time that you are spending on your own individual work to heal and to rebuild trust.”