Language of Love with Dr. Laura Berman

Is It Still Love If Touch Feels Like a Risk?


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Love after trauma isn’t just about passion—it’s about patience. The quiet moments between kisses, the hesitation in a held hand, the unspoken fear that lingers in intimacy… These are the places where love is tested—and where it can be rebuilt.

In this Language of Love Session, we return to Brian and Stacey’s raw, unfolding story. If you’ve been with us, you know: this isn’t just about sex. It’s about two hearts trying to find safety in each other—while wrestling with the ghosts of their pasts.

(If you’re new here, make sure to listen to my past sessions with Brian and Stacy to learn about the heartache, the fights, the small victories that brought them here.)

So what happens when healing almost feels within reach? When the arguments soften, the warmth returns… and then—out of nowhere—the old pain rushes back in?

Here’s What You’ll Take Away:

  • “I want to, but I can’t”—why this conflict is more common than we admit (and how to move through it)

  • How childhood wounds whisper in adult intimacy—and how to quiet them

  • When even loving touch feels like pressure—and how to rewrite that story

  • Why watching porn together became a bridge, not a wall

  • The moment a simple kiss became the bravest act of all

  • How couples accidentally retraumatize each other—and how to stop

  • The shift that helped Stacey reclaim her body—and her voice

  • Why Brian is learning that patience isn’t passive—it’s love in action

    Want to feel safe in your own skin—and in your partner’s arms? Start with my free quiz and then delve into 7 Days to Better Sex. If you're navigating deeper wounds, explore EMDR therapy or dive into the Drama Triangle—because real love shouldn’t reopen old scars. Your story isn’t over. In fact, the most healing chapters may be just ahead.

    Questions or thoughts? I’d love to hear from you: [email protected]

    And if this episode moved you, share it. Healing is contagious when we do it together.


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    Language of Love with Dr. Laura BermanBy The Language of Love

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