We're diving deep into Francis Weller's third gate of grief: the sorrows of the world. This gate reminds us that collective losses like wars, violence, injustice, and environmental destruction impact us whether we acknowledge them or not. We are interdependent beings, wired for connection, and when we try to shut down our caring to protect ourselves, we sacrifice our capacity for joy, flexibility, and resilience. The challenge is to trust our intuitive drive to care and connect, even when it feels uncomfortable. We'll offer some practical strategies to meet that challenge and to help you stay open to collective grief without being overwhelmed by it.

CONTENT WARNING: This episode discusses gun violence.

About: The Joy Lab Podcast blends science and soul to help you cope better with stress, ease anxiety, and uplift mood. Join Dr. Henry Emmons and Dr. Aimee Prasek for practical, mindfulness-based tools and positive psychology strategies to build resilience and create lasting joy.

If you enjoyed this episode, please rate and review us wherever you listen to your favorite podcasts!

And... if you want to spread some joy and keep this podcast ad-free, then please join our mission by donating (Joy Lab is powered by the nonprofit Pathways North and your donations are tax-deductible).

Like and follow Joy Lab on Socials:

Instagram

TikTok

Linkedin

Watch on YouTube

Full transcript here

Sources and Notes for this full grief series:

• Joy Lab Program: Take the next leap in your wellbeing journey with step-by-step practices to help you build and maintain the elements of joy in your life.
• Grief Series:
  • Why We're Doing a 10-Part Series on Grief (And Why You Need It) [part 1, ep 248]
  • Everything We Love, We Will Lose: Navigating the First Gate of Grief [part 2, ep 249]
  • Welcoming Back the Parts of You That Have Not Known Love [part 3, ep 250]
• Other related Joy Lab episodes:
  • The Power of Gathering: Science-Backed Ways to Combat Loneliness Through Group Connection [ep. 240]
  • Sympathetic Fear vs. Sympathetic Joy: What Are You Tuning Into? [ep. 238]
  • Where's Your Third Place? [ep. 171]
  • Learning to Love Well: Creating a House of Belonging [ep. 25]
  • Common Humanity vs Isolation (ep. 28)
  • Lonely in crowded places (this isn't a country music song) (ep. 73)
• Wild Edge of Sorrow by Francis Weller
• Skye Cielita Flor & Miraz Indira, The Joyful Lament: On Pain for the World. 2023 Access here
• Learn more about Joanna Macy's work from the Commons Library.
• "Interdependency is not a contract but a condition, even a precondition." — Dr. María Puig de la Bellacasa
• "Let me keep my distance always from those who think they have the answers. Let me keep company, always, with those who say, look and laugh in astonishment and bow their heads." — Mary Oliver
• "The mind pays for its deadening to the state of our world by giving up its capacity for joy and flexibility." — Joanna Macy
• "Don't be afraid of your sorrow or grief or rage. Treasure them. They come from your caring." — Joanna Macy
• "Joy is the practice of our entanglements." — Ross Gay
• "Grief is brought forth by the safety and holding capacity of the communal nervous system. We cannot and should not do it alone. We have evolved to open together and carry each other into the places that scare us just as we have evolved to sing and praise and dance and grow together." — Skye Cielita Flor and Miraz Indira
• Beckes & Sbarra, Social baseline theory: State of the science and new directions. Access here
• Beckes, et al. (2011). Social Baseline Theory: The Role of Social Proximity in Emotion and Economy of Action. Access here
• Bunea et al. (2017). Early-life adversity and cortisol response to social stress: a meta-analysis. Access here.
• Eisma, et al. (2019). No pain, no gain: cross-lagged analyses of posttraumatic growth and anxiety, depression, posttraumatic stress and prolonged grief symptoms after loss. Access here
• Kamis, et al. (2024). Childhood maltreatment associated with adolescent peer networks: Withdrawal, avoidance, and fragmentation. Access here
• Lehrner, et al. (2014). Maternal PTSD associates with greater glucocorticoid sensitivity in offspring of Holocaust survivors. Access here
• Hirschberger G. (2018). Collective Trauma an d the Social Construction of Meaning. Frontiers in psychology, 9, 1441. Access here
• Sheehy, et al. (2019). An examination of the relationship between shame, guilt and self-harm: A systematic review and meta-analysis. Access here
• Strathearn, et al. (2020). Long-term Cognitive, Psychological, and Health Outcomes Associated With Child Abuse and Neglect. Access here
• Yehuda et al. (1998). Vulnerability to posttraumatic stress disorder in adult offspring of Holocaust survivors. Access here.
• Yehuda, et al. (2018). Intergenerational transmission of trauma effects: putative role of epigenetic mechanisms. Access here

Please remember that this content is for informational and educational purposes only. It is not intended to provide medical advice and is not a replacement for advice and treatment from a medical professional. Please consult your doctor or other qualified health professional before beginning any diet change, supplement, or lifestyle program.

Please see our terms for more information.

If you or someone you know is struggling or in crisis, help is available. Call the NAMI HelpLine: 1-800-950-6264 available Monday through Friday, 10 a.m. – 10 p.m., ET. OR text "HelpLine" to 62640 or email NAMI at [email protected]. Visit NAMI for more. You can also call or text SAMHSA at 988 or chat 988lifeline.org.

We're exploring the second gate of grief from Francis Weller's framework: The Places That Have Not Known Love. Unlike the first gate (episode #249)—which dealt with more of the external losses—this gate turns inward to examine the parts of ourselves we've rejected, hidden, or banished in our need to belong. And this isn't about toxic positivity or pretending everything is fine. It's about integrating the messy, uncomfortable, angry, scared, "too much" parts of yourself—and discovering that when you love what you've rejected, it loses its grip over you.

p.s. Find your Simple Joy practice for this episode right here at our blog.

About: The Joy Lab Podcast blends science and soul to help you cope better with stress, ease anxiety, and uplift mood. Join Dr. Henry Emmons and Dr. Aimee Prasek for practical, mindfulness-based tools and positive psychology strategies to build resilience and create lasting joy.

If you enjoyed this episode, please rate and review us wherever you listen to your favorite podcasts!

And... if you want to spread some joy and keep this podcast ad-free, then please join our mission by donating (Joy Lab is powered by the nonprofit Pathways North and your donations are tax-deductible).

Like and follow Joy Lab on Socials:

Instagram

TikTok

Linkedin

Watch on YouTube

Sources and notes:

• Joy Lab Program: Take the next leap in your wellbeing journey with step-by-step practices to help you build and maintain the elements of joy in your life.
• Imposter phenomenon series:
  • Imposter Syndrome is a Myth (ep. 175)
  • What Imposter Syndrome Really Is (ep. 176)
• Self-connection series:
  • Making Self-Connection Your Superpower in 2026 [ep. 243]
  • The Practice of Self-Awareness: Why You're Worth Knowing [ep. 244]
  • Stop Waiting to Accept Yourself: The Truth About Unconditional Self-Acceptance [ep. 245]
  • The Power of Self-Alignment & Reclaiming Your True Self [ep. 246]
• Self-acceptance episodes:
  • No Need to Hurry, No Need to Sparkle, No Need to Be Anybody But Yourself [ep. 160]
  • Accept Yourself Just As You Are & Then You Can Change [ep. 150]
  • How to Change: External vs Internal Motivators [ep. 145]
• Authenticity series:
  • Unmasking Your True Self: Exploring Authenticity and Awe [ep. 216]
  • Embrace Your True Self: Accepted, Connected, & In The Game [ep. 217]
  • The Road Most Travelled: Awakening Through Suffering [ep. 218]
  • Follow Your Bliss: Awakening to Joy [ep. 219]
  • The Still Small Voice: Awakening with Soulfulness [ep. 220]
• Wild Edge of Sorrow by Francis Weller

Full notes, sources, and full transcript available here.

Please remember that this content is for informational and educational purposes only. It is not intended to provide medical advice and is not a replacement for advice and treatment from a medical professional. Please consult your doctor or other qualified health professional before beginning any diet change, supplement, or lifestyle program. Please see our terms for more information.

If you or someone you know is struggling or in crisis, help is available. Call the NAMI HelpLine: 1-800-950-6264 available Monday through Friday, 10 a.m. – 10 p.m., ET. OR text "HelpLine" to 62640 or email NAMI at [email protected]. Visit NAMI for more. You can also call or text SAMHSA at 988 or chat 988lifeline.org.

In this episode, we're exploring the first of Francis Weller's Five Gates of Grief: "Everything we love, we will lose." This isn't just another depressing truth about life—it's a surprisingly liberating gateway to deeper love, presence, and joy. We'll share some stories and practical wisdom about how savoring practices can help us hold both love and loss simultaneously. Most importantly, we'll highlight why grief is a skill, not just a feeling, and you'll learn a simple five-minute micro-ritual for tending to loss before it accumulates. This conversation weaves together Buddhist teachings on impermanence, neuroscience research on grief and savoring, and the vital reminder that grief is absolutely a team sport.

p.s. Find your Simple Joy practice for this episode right here at our blog.

About: The Joy Lab Podcast blends science and soul to help you cope better with stress, ease anxiety, and uplift mood. Join Dr. Henry Emmons and Dr. Aimee Prasek for practical, mindfulness-based tools and positive psychology strategies to build resilience and create lasting joy.

If you enjoyed this episode, please rate and review us wherever you listen to your favorite podcasts!

And... if you want to spread some joy and keep this podcast ad-free, then please join our mission by donating (Joy Lab is powered by the nonprofit Pathways North and your donations are tax-deductible).

Like and follow Joy Lab on Socials:

Instagram

TikTok

Linkedin

Watch on YouTube

Sources and Notes for this full grief series:

• Joy Lab Program: Take the next leap in your wellbeing journey with step-by-step practices to help you build and maintain the elements of joy in your life.
• Wild Edge of Sorrow by Francis Weller
• "Grief is not a feeling, grief is a skill." — Francis Weller
• "Ritual is a maintenance practice that offers us the means of tending wounds and sorrows, for offering gratitude, allowing our psyches regular periods of release and renewal." — Francis Weller
• "Half of any person is wrong and weak and off the beaten path. Half the other half is dancing and laughing and swimming in the invisible joy." — Rumi
• "We are all the walking wounded in a world that is a war zone. Everything we love will be taken from us. Everything. Last of all life itself. Yet this reality does not diminish love. It shows us that loving is the most important business." -Christina Pinkola Estés' Website
• Skye Cielita Flor & Miraz Indira, The Joyful Lament: On Pain for the World. 2023 Access here
• Learn more about Joanna Macy's work from the Commons Library.
• Beckes & Sbarra, Social baseline theory: State of the science and new directions. Access here
• Beckes, et al. (2011). Social Baseline Theory: The Role of Social Proximity in Emotion and Economy of Action. Access here
• Bunea et al. (2017). Early-life adversity and cortisol response to social stress: a meta-analysis. Access here.
• Eisma, et al. (2019). No pain, no gain: cross-lagged analyses of posttraumatic growth and anxiety, depression, posttraumatic stress and prolonged grief symptoms after loss. Access here
• Lehrner, et al. (2014). Maternal PTSD associates with greater glucocorticoid sensitivity in offspring of Holocaust survivors. Access here
• Kamis, et al. (2024). Childhood maltreatment associated with adolescent peer networks: Withdrawal, avoidance, and fragmentation. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.chiabu.2024.107125
• Sheehy, et al. (2019). An examination of the relationship between shame, guilt and self-harm: A systematic review and meta-analysis. Access here
• Strathearn, et al. (2020). Long-term Cognitive, Psychological, and Health Outcomes Associated With Child Abuse and Neglect. Access here
• Yehuda et al. (1998). Vulnerability to posttraumatic stress disorder in adult offspring of Holocaust survivors. Access here.
• Yehuda, et al. (2018). Intergenerational transmission of trauma effects: putative role of epigenetic mechanisms. Access here

Full transcript available here

Please remember that this content is for informational and educational purposes only. It is not intended to provide medical advice and is not a replacement for advice and treatment from a medical professional. Please consult your doctor or other qualified health professional before beginning any diet change, supplement, or lifestyle program.

Please see our terms for more information.

If you or someone you know is struggling or in crisis, help is available. Call the NAMI HelpLine: 1-800-950-6264 available Monday through Friday, 10 a.m. – 10 p.m., ET. OR text "HelpLine" to 62640 or email NAMI at [email protected]. Visit NAMI for more. You can also call or text SAMHSA at 988 or chat 988lifeline.org.

In this introduction to our 10-part grief series, we'll explain why a podcast about joy is diving deep into grief—and why you can't truly have joy without grief. During this series, we'll mainly lean on Francis Weller's "gates of grief." And importantly, as we move through these gates, the goal is not to help you "get over it" or rush through some prescribed grief stages so you can dismiss "bad" feelings. Instead, we'll explore more about the healing power of grief, how you can see and accept loss with less resistance, and we'll share some practices and realistic ways you can build skills to navigate grief in more nourishing ways.

p.s. Find your Simple Joy practice for this episode right here at our blog.

About: The Joy Lab Podcast blends science and soul to help you cope better with stress, ease anxiety, and uplift mood. Join Dr. Henry Emmons and Dr. Aimee Prasek for practical, mindfulness-based tools and positive psychology strategies to build resilience and create lasting joy.

If you enjoyed this episode, please rate and review us wherever you listen to your favorite podcasts!

And... if you want to spread some joy and keep this podcast ad-free, then please join our mission by donating (Joy Lab is powered by the nonprofit Pathways North and your donations are tax-deductible).

Like and follow Joy Lab on Socials:

Instagram

TikTok

Linkedin

Watch on YouTube

Sources and Notes for this full grief series:

• Joy Lab Program: Take the next leap in your wellbeing journey with step-by-step practices to help you build and maintain the elements of joy in your life.
• Wild Edge of Sorrow by Francis Weller
• Skye Cielita Flor & Miraz Indira, The Joyful Lament: On Pain for the World. 2023 Access here
• Learn more about Joanna Macy's work from the Commons Library.
• Beckes & Sbarra, Social baseline theory: State of the science and new directions. Access here
• Beckes, et al. (2011). Social Baseline Theory: The Role of Social Proximity in Emotion and Economy of Action. Access here
• Bunea et al. (2017). Early-life adversity and cortisol response to social stress: a meta-analysis. Access here.
• Eisma, et al. (2019). No pain, no gain: cross-lagged analyses of posttraumatic growth and anxiety, depression, posttraumatic stress and prolonged grief symptoms after loss. Access here
• Lehrner, et al. (2014). Maternal PTSD associates with greater glucocorticoid sensitivity in offspring of Holocaust survivors. Access here
• Kamis, et al. (2024). Childhood maltreatment associated with adolescent peer networks: Withdrawal, avoidance, and fragmentation.https://doi.org/10.1016/j.chiabu.2024.107125
• Sheehy, et al. (2019). An examination of the relationship between shame, guilt and self-harm: A systematic review and meta-analysis. Access here
• Strathearn, et al. (2020). Long-term Cognitive, Psychological, and Health Outcomes Associated With Child Abuse and Neglect. Access here
• Yehuda et al. (1998). Vulnerability to posttraumatic stress disorder in adult offspring of Holocaust survivors. Access here.
• Yehuda, et al. (2018). Intergenerational transmission of trauma effects: putative role of epigenetic mechanisms. Access here

Full transcript here

Please remember that this content is for informational and educational purposes only. It is not intended to provide medical advice and is not a replacement for advice and treatment from a medical professional. Please consult your doctor or other qualified health professional before beginning any diet change, supplement, or lifestyle program.

Please see our terms for more information.

If you or someone you know is struggling or in crisis, help is available. Call the NAMI HelpLine: 1-800-950-6264 available Monday through Friday, 10 a.m. – 10 p.m., ET. OR text "HelpLine" to 62640 or email NAMI at [email protected]. Visit NAMI for more. You can also call or text SAMHSA at 988 or chat 988lifeline.org.

Why do most New Year's resolutions fail by week three? Often because we don't really connect with those resolutions. In this episode, we'll build on our self-connection series to see how that work of connecting with our true self can inform goals that we're more likely to achieve. We'll focus on a two-step framework for goal achievement: fit (goals that match your authentic values) and grit (sustained effort that doesn't lead to burnout). If you haven't caught the rest of this series, head back to episode 243 for the first part.

p.s., Find your Simple Joy practice for this episode right here at our blog.

About: The Joy Lab Podcast blends science and soul to help you cope better with stress, ease anxiety, and uplift mood. Join Dr. Henry Emmons and Dr. Aimee Prasek for practical, mindfulness-based tools and positive psychology strategies to build resilience and create lasting joy.

If you enjoyed this episode, please rate and review us wherever you listen to your favorite podcasts!

Like and follow Joy Lab on Socials:

Instagram

TikTok

Linkedin

Watch on YouTube

Sources and Notes:

• Joy Lab Program: Take the next leap in your wellbeing journey with step-by-step practices to help you build and maintain the elements of joy in your life.
• Self-connection series:
• Making Self-Connection Your Superpower in 2026 [ep. 243]
• The Practice of Self-Awareness: Why You're Worth Knowing [ep. 244]
• Stop Waiting to Accept Yourself: The Truth About Unconditional Self-Acceptance [ep. 245]
• The Power of Self-Alignment & Reclaiming Your True Self [ep. 246]
• Self-acceptance episodes:
• No Need to Hurry, No Need to Sparkle, No Need to Be Anybody But Yourself [ep. 160]
• Accept Yourself Just As You Are & Then You Can Change [ep. 150]
• How to Change: External vs Internal Motivators [ep. 145]
• Authenticity series:
• Unmasking Your True Self: Exploring Authenticity and Awe [ep. 216]
• Embrace Your True Self: Accepted, Connected, & In The Game [ep. 217]
• The Road Most Travelled: Awakening Through Suffering [ep. 218]
• Follow Your Bliss: Awakening to Joy [ep. 219]
• The Still Small Voice: Awakening with Soulfulness [ep. 220]
• More on inspiration and goal-setting:
• Inspiration: The Engine of Joy" ... gives some great basics for this element of inspiration) [ep. 10]
• Resolution #1: You Don't Need to Be Fixed [ep. 40]
• The Myths of Change [ep. 41]
• Five Principles for Inspired Change (or something that looks remarkably like it) [ep. 42]
• Harmonious vs. Obsessive Passions [ep. 43]
• Dr. Angela Duckworth's website.
• "You may encounter many defeats, but you must not be defeated. In fact, it may be necessary to encounter the defeats so you can know who you are, what you can rise from, and how you can still come out of it." — Maya Angelou

Full transcript here

Coming Next Month on Joy Lab

Next month starts our series on grief. If you're wondering what that has to do with joy, well, it has everything to do with joy. The truth is we can't have one without the other. In the series, we'll explore how to move with and through grief more skillfully so that your joy can grow too. The Science of Goal Setting: Fit (with self-connection) and Grit (with harmonious passion)

Please remember that this content is for informational and educational purposes only. It is not intended to provide medical advice and is not a replacement for advice and treatment from a medical professional. Please consult your doctor or other qualified health professional before beginning any diet change, supplement, or lifestyle program.

Please see our terms for more information.

If you or someone you know is struggling or in crisis, help is available. Call the NAMI HelpLine: 1-800-950-6264 available Monday through Friday, 10 a.m. – 10 p.m., ET. OR text "HelpLine" to 62640 or email NAMI at [email protected]. Visit NAMI for more. You can also call or text SAMHSA at 988 or chat 988lifeline.org.

We're talking about self-alignment today—the final piece of our self-connection series and perhaps the most challenging. What does it really mean to be "comfortable in your own skin"? More than just knowing yourself (self-awareness) or accepting yourself (self-acceptance), self-alignment is about acting in ways consistent with your authentic values, preferences, and internal states. We'll dig into the obstacles of self-alignment and strategies to overcome them, including designing a "values tattoo" that visually captures what matters most to you.

p.s., Find your Simple Joy practice for this episode right here at our blog.

About: The Joy Lab Podcast blends science and soul to help you cope better with stress, ease anxiety, and uplift mood. Join Dr. Henry Emmons and Dr. Aimee Prasek for practical, mindfulness-based tools and positive psychology strategies to build resilience and create lasting joy.

If you enjoyed this episode, please rate and review us wherever you listen to your favorite podcasts!

Like and follow Joy Lab on Socials:

• Instagram
• TikTok
• Linkedin
• YouTube

Watch this episode on YouTube

Sources and Notes:

• Joy Lab Program: Take the next leap in your wellbeing journey with step-by-step practices to help you build and maintain the elements of joy in your life.
• Self-connection series:
• Making Self-Connection Your Superpower in 2026 [ep. 243]
• The Practice of Self-Awareness: Why You're Worth Knowing [ep. 244]
• Stop Waiting to Accept Yourself: The Truth About Unconditional Self-Acceptance [ep. 245]
• The Power of Self-Alignment & Reclaiming Your True Self [ep. 246]
• Self-acceptance episodes:
• No Need to Hurry, No Need to Sparkle, No Need to Be Anybody But Yourself [ep. 160]
• Accept Yourself Just As You Are & Then You Can Change [ep. 150]
• How to Change: External vs Internal Motivators [ep. 145]
• Authenticity series:
• Unmasking Your True Self: Exploring Authenticity and Awe [ep. 216]
• Embrace Your True Self: Accepted, Connected, & In The Game [ep. 217]
• The Road Most Travelled: Awakening Through Suffering [ep. 218]
• Follow Your Bliss: Awakening to Joy [ep. 219]
• The Still Small Voice: Awakening with Soulfulness [ep. 220]
• More on inspiration and goal-setting:
• Inspiration: The Engine of Joy" ... gives some great basics for this element of inspiration) [ep. 10]
• Resolution #1: You Don't Need to Be Fixed [ep. 40]
• The Myths of Change [ep. 41]
• Five Principles for Inspired Change (or something that looks remarkably like it) [ep. 42]
• Harmonious vs. Obsessive Passions [ep. 43]
• May Sarton: "Now I become myself. It's taken time, many years, and places I have been dissolved and shaken, worn other people's faces."
• Parker Palmer: "What a long time it can take to become the person one has always been. How often in the process we mask ourselves in faces that are not our own."
• Mahatma Gandhi: "Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony."

Full transcript available here

Please remember that this content is for informational and educational purposes only. It is not intended to provide medical advice and is not a replacement for advice and treatment from a medical professional. Please consult your doctor or other qualified health professional before beginning any diet change, supplement, or lifestyle program.

Please see our terms for more information.

If you or someone you know is struggling or in crisis, help is available. Call the NAMI HelpLine: 1-800-950-6264 available Monday through Friday, 10 a.m. – 10 p.m., ET. OR text "HelpLine" to 62640 or email NAMI at [email protected]. Visit NAMI for more. You can also call or text SAMHSA at 988 or chat 988lifeline.org.

Most of us are wait to accept ourselves after we achieve our goals—after we get that award, land the job, or fix that flaw. But this approach keeps us trapped in an endless cycle of unworthiness. In this episode, we'll dig into why self-acceptance is actually the most powerful fuel for growth and healing. We'll also spend some extra time on the difference between conditional and unconditional self-acceptance, why our minds constantly judge us, and practical ways to break free from self-criticism. If you've ever felt stuck in patterns of negative self-talk or believed you need to be "fixed" before you deserve acceptance, this episode offers a compassionate, scientifically-grounded path forward.

About: The Joy Lab Podcast blends science and soul to help you cope better with stress, ease anxiety, and uplift mood. Join Dr. Henry Emmons and Dr. Aimee Prasek for practical, mindfulness-based tools and positive psychology strategies to build resilience and create lasting joy.

If you enjoyed this episode, please rate and review us wherever you listen to your favorite podcasts!

Like and follow Joy Lab on Socials:

Instagram

TikTok

Linkedin

Watch on YouTube

Sources and Notes:

• Joy Lab Program: Take the next leap in your wellbeing journey with step-by-step practices to help you build and maintain the elements of joy in your life.
• Related Joy Lab Podcast Episodes
• Self-connection series:
• Making Self-Connection Your Superpower in 2026 [ep. 243]
• The Practice of Self-Awareness: Why You're Worth Knowing [ep. 244]
• Self-acceptance episodes:
• No Need to Hurry, No Need to Sparkle, No Need to Be Anybody But Yourself [ep. 160]
• Accept Yourself Just As You Are & Then You Can Change [ep. 150]
• How to Change: External vs Internal Motivators [ep. 145]
• Authenticity series:
• Unmasking Your True Self: Exploring Authenticity and Awe [ep. 216]
• Embrace Your True Self: Accepted, Connected, & In The Game [ep. 217]
• The Road Most Travelled: Awakening Through Suffering [ep. 218]
• Follow Your Bliss: Awakening to Joy [ep. 219]
• The Still Small Voice: Awakening with Soulfulness [ep. 220]
• Reducing Negative Self-Talk with Illeism [ep. 235]
• "The truth is belonging starts with self-acceptance. Your level of belonging, in fact, can never be greater than your level of self-acceptance." —Brené Brown
• Simple Joy exercise for this episode: https://www.joylab.coach/blog/the-self-acceptance-trap-why-i-ll-love-myself-after-never-works

Full transcript here.

The Illeism Affirmation Practice

1. Create an affirmation using third-person perspective (you, they, or your name)
2. Example: "You are a person worth knowing and you are worthy of acceptance"
3. Pair with supportive touch—place gentle pressure on chest, legs, stomach, or wherever feels comforting
4. Use when self-judgment rises, repeating several times
5. This isn't a magic pill, but it helps the brain take a different road

Many Selves List (from previous episode)

• Review your list with the "you" perspective
• Add more items using psychological distance
• Notice how this third-person view allows you to see yourself more compassionately

Coming This Month on Joy Lab

January's series on Self-Connection will explore:

• Self-Awareness practices and principles
• Self-Acceptance techniques for compassionate inner dialogue
• Self-Alignment strategies for living in integrity with your values
• Self-Concordant Goals: a powerful alternative to traditional goal-setting
• Applied mindfulness practices to deepen each component

Please remember that this content is for informational and educational purposes only. It is not intended to provide medical advice and is not a replacement for advice and treatment from a medical professional. Please consult your doctor or other qualified health professional before beginning any diet change, supplement, or lifestyle program.

Please see our terms for more information.

If you or someone you know is struggling or in crisis, help is available. Call the NAMI HelpLine: 1-800-950-6264 available Monday through Friday, 10 a.m. – 10 p.m., ET. OR text "HelpLine" to 62640 or email NAMI at [email protected]. Visit NAMI for more. You can also call or text SAMHSA at 988 or chat 988lifeline.org.

Are you self-aware? Thankfully, it's not a yes or no question. Self-awareness is the practice of knowing yourself without judgment and it isn't a one-and-done achievement. It's a lifelong practice that exists on a spectrum, varies across different domains of your life, and requires us to embrace all our multitudes—even the parts we'd rather push away. The truth is that you are worth knowing. All of you. We'll dig into some of the obstacles and superpowers that self-awareness brings, including its foundation for psychological health, wellbeing, and ultimately, living a more inspired life.

About: The Joy Lab Podcast blends science and soul to help you cope better with stress, ease anxiety, and uplift mood. Join Dr. Henry Emmons and Dr. Aimee Prasek for practical, mindfulness-based tools and positive psychology strategies to build resilience and create lasting joy.

If you enjoyed this episode, please rate and review us wherever you listen to your favorite podcasts!

Like and follow Joy Lab on Socials:

Instagram

TikTok

Linkedin

Watch on YouTube

Sources and Notes:

• Joy Lab Program: Take the next leap in your wellbeing journey with step-by-step practices to help you build and maintain the elements of joy in your life.
• Related Joy Lab Podcast Episodes
  • Unmasking Your True Self: Exploring Authenticity and Awe [ep. 216]
  • Embrace Your True Self: Accepted, Connected, & In The Game [ep. 217]
  • The Road Most Travelled: Awakening Through Suffering [ep. 218]
  • Follow Your Bliss: Awakening to Joy [ep. 219]
  • The Still Small Voice: Awakening with Soulfulness [ep. 220]
  • Equanimity: A Tool for Emotional Reactivity & the Power of Grounding [ep. 48]
  • Equanimity: When an Emotional Storm Hits & Thoughts Start Spiraling [ep. 49]
  • Equanimity: Seeing our Storylines and Changing Course [ep. 50]
  • Equanimity: Emotional Reactivity and Damage Control [ep. 51]
  • Equanimity: Cleaning Up After the Storm with Self-Compassion [ep. 52]
• Self love is not narcissism [ep. 227]
• Authenticity series:
• Weathering emotional storms series:
• "They who have not looked on sorrow will never see joy." - Khalil Gibran
• "Once the storm is over, you won't remember how you made it through, how you managed to survive. You won't even be sure whether the storm is really over. But one thing is certain. When you come out of the storm, you won't be the same person who walked in. That's what the storm's all about." - Haruki Murakami
• "We are not nouns. We are verbs. I am not a thing, an actor or writer. I am a person who does things. I write, I act, and I never know what I'm gonna do next. I think you can be imprisoned if you think of yourself as a noun." - Stephen Fry
• "The universe is not outside of you. Look inside yourself. Everything that you want, you already are." - Rumi

Full transcript and show notes here

Coming This Month on Joy Lab

January's series on Self-Connection will explore:

• Self-Awareness practices and principles
• Self-Acceptance techniques for compassionate inner dialogue
• Self-Alignment strategies for living in integrity with your values
• Self-Concordant Goals: a powerful alternative to traditional goal-setting
• Applied mindfulness practices to deepen each component

Please remember that this content is for informational and educational purposes only. It is not intended to provide medical advice and is not a replacement for advice and treatment from a medical professional. Please consult your doctor or other qualified health professional before beginning any diet change, supplement, or lifestyle program.

Please see our terms for more information.

If you or someone you know is struggling or in crisis, help is available. Call the NAMI HelpLine: 1-800-950-6264 available Monday through Friday, 10 a.m. – 10 p.m., ET. OR text "HelpLine" to 62640 or email NAMI at [email protected]. Visit NAMI for more. You can also call or text SAMHSA at 988 or chat 988lifeline.org.

Happy New Year! Welcome to a special Thursday episode of Joy Lab as we kick off 2026 with our Element of Inspiration. We'll explore why inspiration is so much more powerful than willpower-driven resolutions with some extra attention to the good news that inspiration is absolutely a skill you can cultivate. This is also the first episode of our series on self-connection. We'll start by highlighting the three components that create fertile ground for inspiration: self-awareness, self-acceptance, and self-alignment. If you've ever felt disconnected from yourself or struggled to move from dreaming to doing, this episode offers both the research and a roadmap.

About: The Joy Lab Podcast blends science and soul to help you cope better with stress, ease anxiety, and uplift mood. Join Dr. Henry Emmons and Dr. Aimee Prasek for practical, mindfulness-based tools and positive psychology strategies to build resilience and create lasting joy.

If you enjoyed this episode, please rate and review us wherever you listen to your favorite podcasts!

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Sources and Notes:

• Joy Lab Program: Take the next leap in your wellbeing journey with step-by-step practices to help you build and maintain the elements of joy in your life.
• Related Joy Lab Podcast Episodes:
• Inspiration: The Engine of Joy" ... gives some great basics for this element of inspiration) [ep. 10]
• Resolution #1: You Don't Need to Be Fixed [ep. 40]
• The Myths of Change [ep. 41]
• Five Principles for Inspired Change (or something that looks remarkably like it) [ep. 42]
• Harmonious vs. Obsessive Passions [ep. 43]

Please remember that this content is for informational and educational purposes only. It is not intended to provide medical advice and is not a replacement for advice and treatment from a medical professional. Please consult your doctor or other qualified health professional before beginning any diet change, supplement, or lifestyle program.

Please see our terms for more information.

If you or someone you know is struggling or in crisis, help is available. Call the NAMI HelpLine: 1-800-950-6264 available Monday through Friday, 10 a.m. – 10 p.m., ET. OR text "HelpLine" to 62640 or email NAMI at [email protected]. Visit NAMI for more. You can also call or text SAMHSA at 988 or chat 988lifeline.org.

It's been an interesting year (and honestly, we're still searching for the right adjective). But one thing is crystal clear: we desperately need to prioritize joy—our own and others'. And no, that's not toxic positivity talking. In this special episode, we'll talk about what joy actually means at Joy Lab. Spoiler alert: it's not just happiness, and it's definitely not dependent on your life circumstances being perfect. The truth is that joy is an unbreakable undercurrent that exists within each of us—even the self-proclaimed pessimists among us.

This episode is also a heartfelt call to action. As a nonprofit committed to keeping mental health resources accessible and ad-free, Joy Lab needs your support to continue spreading evidence-based, soul-filled tools for resilience and wellbeing. Whether you have $5 to spare or a yacht full of cash, there are meaningful ways to give.

Ways You Can Spread Joy

Financial Support

• Donate: https://www.joylab.coach/donate
• Even $5-10 makes a real difference
• Monthly donations help us sustain this work long-term

Share the Joy

• Tell someone about the Joy Lab Podcast
• Share an episode that resonated with you
• Help someone discover us when they need us most

Create Ripples

• Practice what you learn
• Become your own island of light
• Let your light spread to others

About: The Joy Lab Podcast blends science and soul to help you cope better with stress, ease anxiety, and uplift mood. Join Dr. Henry Emmons and Dr. Aimee Prasek for practical, mindfulness-based tools and positive psychology strategies to build resilience and create lasting joy.

If you enjoyed this episode, please rate and review us wherever you listen to your favorite podcasts!

Full transcript here.

Please remember that this content is for informational and educational purposes only. It is not intended to provide medical advice and is not a replacement for advice and treatment from a medical professional. Please consult your doctor or other qualified health professional before beginning any diet change, supplement, or lifestyle program.

Please see our terms for more information.

If you or someone you know is struggling or in crisis, help is available. Call the NAMI HelpLine: 1-800-950-6264 available Monday through Friday, 10 a.m. – 10 p.m., ET. OR text "HelpLine" to 62640 or email NAMI at [email protected]. Visit NAMI for more. You can also call or text SAMHSA at 988 or chat 988lifeline.org.