Have you ever heard the story of the cows and the buffalos? To sum it up for you- animals have a sense of when a storm is coming, and cows and buffalos have two very different ways that they react. Cows sort of panic and run the opposite direction. The storm eventually catches up to them, and since they're still running in the same direction, it prolongs the amount of time they're in it. But buffalos do pretty much the opposite. They band together, put their heads down and charge the storm! That way, they get through it quickly and can go on living their normal lives.

In this episode, I want to talk about why reacting to negative emotions like buffalos react to storms is in your best interest. If we run from our negative emotions we miss out on valuable experiences, we stay stuck in our "storm," and we don't learn the valuable lessons that our pain teaches us. Listen for the examples I give- can you relate to any? Are you running from your negative emotions? I can help.

Elder Worthlin's talk: Come What May, and Love It

Related episode: This What It's Like to be Human

Chances are you've probably heard of Gary Chapman's five love languages. But rather than thinking of them in a romantic sense, today I want to put those love languages in the context of strengthening our relationships with our children and, even more importantly, ourselves.

Words of affirmation, acts of service, physical touch, gifts, quality time, and I would add food ;) all have a place in helping our teens feel loved, whether they choose to accept it or not. It's also important to make sure our love language need are being met. And luckily we don't have to rely on anyone else to do that for us- we can do it for ourselves! Tune in to today's episode to see what I mean and get some good examples.

For the month of February I'm focusing on love- for our families, ourselves, our lives! Having a hard time loving something or someone? Schedule a free 30-minute session with me here!

See you next week!

Nobody likes listening to fighting at home. In fact, the Book of Mormon even tells us that we should be teaching our children not to fight and quarrel(Mosiah 4:14-15). I don't know about you, but my knee-jerk reaction when I hear my kids fighting is to jump right in the middle of it. I used to think that in order for everyone to love each other, I had to get them to stop fighting.

But what if that's backwards? What if, in order to get my family to stop fighting, I have to create an atmosphere of love in my home? I'm talking about how to do just that in detail in today's episode. Having patience and compassion and love for yourself first, loving people exactly how they are right now, and loving the process can all make such a difference in your home, your life, and the lives of those you love.

Elder Eyring's talk: A Home Where the Spirit of the Lord Dwells

Related Episode: Contention in the Home

Good news- I've opened up a couple spots for one-on-one coaching in February! Schedule a free consultation with me here  for more information. Thanks for listening and have a great week!

I want you to think about your first reaction when you feel a negative emotion. Do you shove it down and try to ignore it? Do you think about it nonstop to the point of wallowing it? We all have moments where we do these. But today, I'm here to tell you that emotional pain does not mean that something has gone wrong.

Part of being a human is that we get to experience this wild ride of emotions- good and bad. Now I'm not talking about mental illness or trauma response or other situations that require the help of a trained professional. But believe it or not, clean emotional pain can help us grow and develop into the person we want to be! The problem is when we let ourselves get stuck in that state of mind or we let our emotions morph into something unhelpful, aka dirty pain.

Here's the quote I used from Eve.

If you feel like you're having a hard time discerning your clean pain versus your dirty pain, sign up for a free 30-minute consultation with me by clicking here.

Have yourself a great week!

"We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal..." Those are arguably some of the most powerful words in history that previously, and even at that time, weren't actually believed by most. But when they were written down, all of a sudden, it set a new standard for mankind. What are some of the most powerful words you've heard in your life?

Our words create our reality. The words we speak to those around us and especially to ourselves have a profound impact on our thoughts and our actions as well as that of those around us. Today I want to take some time to give some examples of powerful words that have shaped my life, why that's important, and what you can do to shape your own reality with your words.

Here's that quote by Lawrence G. Lovasik.

P.S. If you have been loving the tools this podcast gives you, or you feel that it has been helpful in some way, I would love for you to leave a review! This is one of the best ways to can spread the word and help other parents who may be struggling.

Now have yourself a great week!

Picture this: Your teenager is on a rampage this afternoon. Huffing and puffing, slamming doors, snapping at siblings, rolling their eyes at you and demanding to know how you think they're supposed to get everything they're supposed to done in time. Sound familiar?

First of all, remain calm. Easier said than done, I know. After all, you told them to work on their school project instead of hanging out with friend last night! But remember- giving in and matching their emotionally heightened, illogical state of mind won't do anyone any good.

Instead, your teen needs connection. They need to be seen and heard and validated. They also probably need some support-"That sounds tough, I'm sorry you're struggling today. How can I help you?"

Tune in to today's episode for some more in-depth examples and suggestions of how you can reduce conflict with your teenager!

And don't forget- this is the last week to register for my small group coaching program for moms who's teens have left or are questioning the church. Click here to schedule a free call with me for more info!

One thing that a lot of my clients are struggling with or have struggled with in the past is one or more of their children questioning and/or leaving the church. It's so easy to let our fears take over in this situation- What if they live a life full of misery? What if we don't get to be together forever as a family? While we can't predict the outcome, we do know that Heavenly Father has a perfect plan for each one of us. And in the meantime, I have a few tips that can significantly ease the burden you may feel you are carrying.

1. Instead of panicking and believing that everything has gone wrong, trust in Heavenly Father and His perfect plan. He's got this! Choose faith of fear.

2. You may be tempted to make this about you. 'What did I do wrong?', etc. But it doesn't have to be about you! Try taking this time to focus on your child. Make a real effort to understand them and strengthen your connection with them.

3. Rather than constantly trying to teach and voice your opinion (*cough* lecturing *cough*), focus on your testimony. This is a great opportunity to grow your own faith, and then model it for your child!

Just remember that nothing has gone wrong here. And if you're going through this particular trial, come join me and a few others in my first ever small coaching group! You'll have a tribe of women who are going through it right alongside you. You'll learn valuable tools to help you throughout your life and receive personalized coaching! Click here and choose "small group info" to schedule a free call with me for more information. But act fast, because registration closes next week!

Special treat today on the podcast! 

I have a guided meditation to help you slow down this Christmas season and focus yourself on Jesus Christ, the light of the world.

Here are the scriptures I used:

D&C 93:8-9   

Mosiah 16:9

John 8:12

Ether 4:12

D&C 84:45

D&C 93:2

Find a quiet, comfy spot and enjoy meditating on the Light of the World!

We all know that the Christmas season is supposed to be the most wonderful time of the year, right? I know it is for me! But what about that mother-in-law that always criticizes your parenting or the sister that tries to guilt you into staying longer than you have the energy for? Family get-togethers, work parties, or gatherings in general are such a huge part of the holidays for most people, and for many of those people they can be a source stress, anxiety, or maybe even dread.

Well to those of you feeling this way- have no fear! I've got a couple of tips that, if applied, will make this year's festivities the best yet!

Tip 1- Choose a reason for going that you love.

Tip 2- Know your boundaries and be in charge of sticking to them.

Tip 3- When having a conversation you may not typically enjoy, go into it with the intention of finding something you love about that person... and then tell them!

As you listen to today's episode, think of which situations (or people) you can apply these tools with. Maybe even write it down and practice before the big event. I think you'll be surprised at what a difference it can make!

For more info on how to set boundaries, take a listen to Episode 18- Setting Boundaries with Adults.

Do you have a teen or young adult that is questioning or has left the church? I'm coaching my first small group! For more information, schedule a FREE short info call here. 

'Tis the season for gathering!

Gather is a word that is often on my mind. It also hangs on my wall as a reminder of the work I am committed to.

In today's episode I'm talking about the importance of gathering. I'll share a few tips on how to make your holiday gatherings more joyful.

I'm also talking about how my own gathering efforts will be changing next year.

Click  here to talk to me personally about joining our coaching group!

Quote by Stephen W. Owen