The holidays are often portrayed as the “happiest time of year,” but for many living with grief and depression, they can be especially painful. In this episode, grief expert Krista St-Germain joins hosts Terry and Dr. Anita Sanz to discuss the overlap between grief and depression, how loss changes holiday traditions, and strategies for navigating family expectations while honoring your own needs.

Listeners will gain practical tools for setting boundaries, managing difficult emotions, and giving themselves permission to rewrite traditions that no longer feel supportive. This is an honest and compassionate conversation for anyone struggling during the holiday season.

Primary Topics Covered:

• The difference and overlap between grief and depression
• How holiday traditions can trigger feelings of loss, sadness, and anxiety
• Why grief is about more than bereavement—loss of dreams, opportunities, health, or identity count too
• Practical communication strategies for setting boundaries with loved ones
• How to deal with conflicting family needs and expectations
• Managing internal pressure, “should thinking,” and anticipatory dread
• Krista’s NOW method (Name, Open, Witness) for processing emotions
• The role of self-compassion and boundaries in coping with holiday grief

Timestamps:

• 00:00 - Introduction to the podcast and today’s topic
• 01:44 - Why holidays can intensify grief and depression
• 04:10 - The overlap and differences between grief and depression
• 06:26 - Grief beyond bereavement: lost dreams, health, opportunities
• 08:50 - The unrealistic pressure of “the happiest season of all”
• 09:16 - Rewriting holiday traditions and giving yourself permission
• 10:20 - Communicating your needs to family and friends
• 12:18 - Balancing different needs within a household
• 13:05 - “Should thinking” and the trap of self-imposed expectations
• 13:36 - Anticipatory grief and dreading upcoming events
• 15:20 - The NOW method (Name, Open, Witness) for feeling emotions
• 17:46 - Handling resistance from others and setting boundaries
• 18:02 - Choosing whose disappointment matters most (self vs. others)
• 19:35 - Boundaries and the discomfort of breaking people-pleasing habits
• 20:40 - Grieving lost dreams, hopes, and opportunities
• 21:51 - Naming and witnessing emotions as a mindful practice
• 22:47 - Learning that it’s okay if others are disappointed
• 23:38 - Giving others permission to feel disappointment without conflict
• 25:24 - Why grief and depression are misunderstood and stigmatized
• 26:19 - EFT tapping and other tools for emotional regulation
• 27:17 - Closing thoughts and holiday encouragement

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