Susan Gelles was a lawyer in her 30s who was too busy to find love. But after finally admitting that she was lonely, Susan did something that went against all her best instincts. She started attending singles mixers.

On this episode, Susan shares her disastrous mismatches, awkward flirtations and the story of how she almost missed her chance to meet the love of her life.

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Khalid Abdulqaadir reads his Modern Love essay, “The Polygraph Test That Saved My Marriage." 

To hear our conversation with Khalid, listen to the episode: “Have You Ever Kept a Secret From Your Wife?”

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Khalid Abdulqaadir’s life was full of secrets. He started keeping them when he was a teenager, after his father was accused of an unimaginable crime. He didn’t want to explain his family history every time he started a new relationship. So his secrets followed him, even as he got married.

Many years later, Khalid was interviewing for a job in the U.S. government, and he was required to take a polygraph test. The examiner asked him a question he could not avoid: “Have you ever kept a secret from your wife?”

Khalid knew that it was time to tell his wife everything.

This is the first episode of our new season! We’ll be back every Wednesday with a new story.

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Samantha Joseph’s childhood was scattered with golden trips to California to visit her Aunt Gail. Aunt Gail was the cool aunt. She worked in Hollywood and befriended actors like Robin Williams, Mayim Bialik and the cast of “Friends.” And yet she was still relatable (she’d get on the floor and play like a kid).

One day, those trips to California stopped: Aunt Gail no longer wanted to see Samantha’s family. Samantha was devastated, and several years later, she was devastated again by the news that Aunt Gail had died by suicide.

Today, Samantha shares her search for answers following her aunt’s death and how a conversation with David Schwimmer helped her to heal.

Today’s Story:

• “I Had to Stop Asking Why” by Samantha Joseph

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Samantha Joseph reads her Modern Love essay, “I Had to Stop Asking Why.” You can listen to Anna’s interview with Samantha in the “Modern Love” podcast feed - the episode is called “I Needed David Schwimmer’s Help:. 

You can also read Samantha’s essay on the New York Times website here.

Unlock full access to New York Times podcasts and explore everything from politics to pop culture. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify.

Nell Stephens reads her Modern Love essay, “How I Lost the Financé but Won the Honeymoon.” You can listen to Anna’s interview with Nell in the “Modern Love” podcast feed. 

You can also read Nell’s  essay on the New York Times website here.

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Bored and in love, Nell Stevens found a hobby combing the internet and entering her name into online contests. But, when she actually wins a prize — a luxury honeymoon in India — her world falls apart: The man she thought she was going to marry breaks up with her.

She decides to go on the trip anyway.

On today’s show, the host Anna Martin talks with Nell about her fiancé-less honeymoon — and what she had discovered about herself by the time she returned home.

Today’s story

• “How I Lost the Fiancé but Won the Honeymoon ,” By Nell Stevens

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The last time David visited his ailing grandmother, he hid his wedding ring in his pocket. He’d never told her about his identity as a gay, married man. Fearful David’s grandmother would disown him, his family never told her about David’s loving marriage with his husband, Constantino. It was an untruth David lived with until the day she died.

Today, David shares how that untruth left a gaping hole in his relationship with his grandmother — and the power of telling the truth in his eulogy.

Today’s story

• “The House Where My Husband Doesn’t Exist,” By David Khalaf

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Imagine you are on vacation. Your favorite shirt is waiting for you in your suitcase. You go to put it on, only to realize it’s not there. You forgot it, and there’s nothing you can do now.

That’s an experience that played out time and again for Natalie Muñoz, who split her childhood and adolescence between her parents’ houses after their divorce. Now that she’s turning 18, she tells us how she’s finding a balance that works better for her.

Then, Modern Love listeners share stories about the moment they knew their parents were really divorcing and how that feeling has lingered throughout their lives.

Today's Story:

• "My Two-House, Duffel-Bag Life," by Natalie Muñoz

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Kema Christian-Coates’s childhood was filled with “holiday men,” absentee fathers — including her own — who returned each year around Christmas only to disappear again. Her father’s absence left a hole in her life and the fear that she, like her mother and grandmother, would never find a man she could rely on.

Today, we hear Kema’s story on realizing the power of her mother and grandmother’s presence in her life and on finding a lasting partnership.

Today’s story:

• “The Gift of Missing Men,” by Kema Christian-Coates

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