Not For Everyone

Hot takes are back with a vengeance as the lover and hater tackle the problem with 69ing, their views on open relationships and keeping people on the backburner, and a number of topics that have them realizing just how basic they are - birthday month, Barbie movie, and pumpkin spice to name a few. Okay, mostly Jess, who balances it out with strong opinions on hot fruit and microwaved quesadillas. Meanwhile, Caroline insists she was popular with the boys as a child, though always on the lookout for fedoras and earlobes.

But first, a complaint about skincare instructions, an announcement about derma-planing, and examples of times Jess and Caroline have stood up for themselves recently - including updates on gym etiquette and the Mykonos club scene.

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This episode was edited by none other than our prince, Abi Newhouse. DM her for your audio editing needs!

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Intro Music: “Doja Dance” by PALA

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DISCLAIMER: All opinions are our own. We are not therapists or health professionals, or professional of any kind, really. Please see your own professional or counselor for professional support. Do your research and be safe!

The mood is malaise as Jess and Caroline mosey into a conversation about platonic male/female friendship that they certainly weren't prepared to tackle. Similarly, Jess wasn't prepared to start vlogging this week, though she definitely tried after feeling so inspired by Caroline's recent YouTube video. The compliments lead to an existential question: What do you wish you were appreciated for more often?

Caroline does NOT appreciate gym bros who don't put back their weights. At least she has a new NFE sweatshirt to comfort her. Do y'all want merch? Also have y'all heard of the moon? It apparently is full at the end of every month and also menstruation is hard.

Romantic body types don't make sense but lush yin somehow does. Hands can be hot and there are give or take eight different kinds of feet. Just because we know this doesn't mean we want our toes sucked, and oh also Caroline is still haunted but that doesn't mean you need to DM Jess.

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This episode was edited by none other than our prince, Abi Newhouse. DM her for your audio editing needs!

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Share with a friend!

Follow, rate, and review on your favorite podcasting app!

And SUBSCRIBE on ⁠YouTube⁠ for full episode video.

Plus FOLLOW US on Instagram for more:

@not4everyonepod

@thegoodsitter

@jzdebakey

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Intro Music: “Doja Dance” by PALA

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DISCLAIMER: All opinions are our own. We are not therapists or health professionals, or professional of any kind, really. Please see your own professional or counselor for professional support. Do your research and be safe!

It's Caroline's birthday and Jess endured a child who's never heard the word "no" to fly out and touch knees with her. It was worth it for all the announcements in this in-person episode.

The thing about intrusive thoughts is that if you imagine your sister thought about stabbing you too, you'd feel a lot better about the fact that neither of you has done it yet. You aren't your thoughts, and you also aren't your response time to that group text that's been blowing up your phone all day. If you think about it, so rarely does banter in a group chat correlate to depth of connection IRL. Context switching is hard.

That's why Caroline swears by time-boxing her texting, and Jess swears if she just had 4 or 5 hours or years she'd get everything on her to-do list done perfectly. Plus, debating your anniversary with your partner is actually a form of asking for words of affirmation, but isn't everything when you're two girls who talk for a living (almost)? It doesn't mean any one love language is superior to the other.

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This episode was edited by none other than our prince, Abi Newhouse. DM her for your audio editing needs!

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Share with a friend! Subscribe and rate us on your favorite podcasting app! Review us on Apple Podcasts!

SUBSCRIBE on ⁠YouTube⁠ for full episode video.

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@not4everyonepod

@thegoodsitter

@jzdebakey

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Intro Music: “Doja Dance” by PALA

DISCLAIMER: All opinions are our own. We are not therapists or health professionals, or professional of any kind, really. Please see your own professional or counselor for professional support. Do your research and be safe!

Slumber party!!! This week, the lights are off and the sleepover just got real intimate as Jess and Caroline talk without video. In other words, there's no YouTube video this week - also who knew regular phone calls were still a thing?!).

It gets existential fast with a conversation about how memories are formed, which leads into an exploration of the idea that we’re living in a simulation. What would that change? The possibility of an afterlife? Does that mean we don’t have to be good people anymore, because it feels like we probably still should.

A new hair hack and some tampon stories appropriately round out the sleepover vibes. Then, Caroline gets personal, sharing a concept she heard on the Do You F*cking Mind? podcast: “Who is getting the best of you?” The two talk about bringing your best self to your relationships, and how it’s sometimes at odds with bringing your truest self - not to mention giving yourself a damn break. Plus, Caroline’s been procrastinating filming and Jess gets weird post-recording.

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This episode was edited by none other than our prince, Abi Newhouse. DM her for your audio editing needs!

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Share with a friend! Subscribe and rate us on your favorite podcasting app! Review us on Apple Podcasts!

SUBSCRIBE on ⁠YouTube⁠ for full episode video.

And FOLLOW US on Instagram for more:

@not4everyonepod

@thegoodsitter

@jzdebakey

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Intro Music: “Doja Dance” by PALA

DISCLAIMER: All opinions are our own. We are not therapists or health professionals, or professional of any kind, really. Please see your own professional or counselor for professional support. Do your research and be safe!

It would be off brand to open with anything other than hair talk, so Caroline gets right to critiquing her new haircut, which is unfortunately more Brooklyn hipster than it is American Girl doll. This triggers memories of eyebrow and leg hair shame from middle and high school, setting the groundwork for the rest of the episode: everything is a lie.

Starting with the lies that people tell about romance in their long-term relationships! Jess can't stand it, so she insists on sharing how she and her boyfriend have recently found connection in the mundane, including a story about dumpster diving plus video game foreplay. Meanwhile, Caroline's done keeping her recent fantasies to herself. Being breastfed by a man is nourishing and gender-bending, her boyfriend gets very small and very far sometimes, and most importantly she cannot marry Jess even though it's all scheduled and everything. Marriage is a scam but we like it!

Dunkin cold cream is actually whipped cream which is actually cold foam. Claw clips are fertile (even earthen) ground for disagreement. And playing sports in high school is not a personality. Neither are Jess's college a cappella days, but the difference is she'll tell you she's cute - no questions asked.

Finally, a game of Super Theoreticals inspires a conversation about avoiding sadness at all costs, only to get horny thinking about Lion King moments later, and that's just what you get on NFE!

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This episode was edited by none other than our prince, Abi Newhouse. DM her for your audio editing needs!

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Share with a friend! Subscribe and rate us on your favorite podcasting app! Review us on Apple Podcasts!

SUBSCRIBE on ⁠YouTube⁠ for full episode video.

And FOLLOW US on Instagram for more:

@not4everyonepod

@thegoodsitter

@jzdebakey

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Intro Music: “Doja Dance” by PALA

DISCLAIMER: All opinions are our own. We are not therapists or health professionals, or professional of any kind, really. Please see your own professional or counselor for professional support. Do your research and be safe!

You sent in your dating struggles; we pulled our best advice out of our asses. In this strange new world of app dating, constant anxiety, and ever-changing standards, how do we stay true to ourselves when looking for connection? Not super well, but everything we've learned in hindsight, we're here to share with you.

Plus, some of YOUR best dating advice, and why this is all just one big animal style numbers game.

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This episode was edited by none other than our prince, Abi Newhouse. DM her for your audio editing needs!

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Share with a friend! Subscribe and rate us on your favorite podcasting app! Review us on Apple Podcasts!

SUBSCRIBE on ⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube⁠⁠⁠⁠ for full episode video.

And FOLLOW US on Instagram for more:

⁠⁠⁠@not4everyonepod⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠@thegoodsitter⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠@jzdebakey⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠@abinewhouse⁠⁠⁠

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Intro Music: “Doja Dance” by PALA

__

DISCLAIMER: All opinions are our own. We are not therapists or health professionals, or professional of any kind, really. Please see your own professional or counselor for professional support. Do your research and be safe!

As usual, a compliment turns into a larger conversation about coveting hotness and beauty standards, as Jess and Caroline agree that the only thing they (or any of us) really care about is sex and attraction. But is beauty work a lie, or is it simply a way to masquerade in an identity they haven't historically aligned with?

This breakdown of identity turns into a reflection on how people talk about themselves - basically, what all of our dating profiles would say if they were actually true. We chat about our best and worst qualities when it comes to romantic relationships, Jess describes why ice has become her love language, and Caroline finds herself relating to monkeys, bison, and...yep we're on cats again.

Urgent news announcement! Lizzo posted about UFOs and we're wondering what it means for us. Plus, foot stuff, and the tenuous process of reconciling with your mom. Just be chill; it's not an apology.

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Share with a friend! Subscribe and rate us on your favorite podcasting app! Review us on Apple Podcasts!

SUBSCRIBE on ⁠YouTube⁠ for full episode video.

And FOLLOW US on Instagram for more:

@not4everyonepod

@thegoodsitter

@jzdebakey

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Intro Music: “Doja Dance” by PALA

DISCLAIMER: All opinions are our own. We are not therapists or health professionals, or professional of any kind, really. Please see your own professional or counselor for professional support. Do your research and be safe!

WHATADOS are back, and though Jess and Caroline are physically falling apart and can't agree about hair removal strategies, their non-advice to the kooks is ready to rage.

First up, keeping the fire alive in a long-term relationship - including asking for what you want (both directly and indirectly) and evaluating your sex life for signs of disconnection. Speaking of sex life, "whatado: eye contact giving head" is one of the best questions (if it can be considered a question) that we've ever received. Plus, why texting your ex happy birthday is always self-serving, and how to deal with unsolicited advice from friends in relationships when you're single and they're projecting. Make sure to check out the Instagram reel we referenced as an example in that last one.

We wrap it up with a revelation from Caroline about the vulnerability that is needed for a new relationship to work, and a complaint from Jess that has thrown off her vision for some time now. We all have those smudges we just can't get out.

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Share with a friend! Subscribe and rate us on your favorite podcasting app! Review us on Apple Podcasts!

SUBSCRIBE on ⁠YouTube⁠ for full episode video.

And FOLLOW US on Instagram for more:

@not4everyonepod

@thegoodsitter

@jzdebakey

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Intro Music: “Doja Dance” by PALA

DISCLAIMER: All opinions are our own. We are not therapists or health professionals, or professional of any kind, really. Please see your own professional or counselor for professional support. Do your research and be safe!

Caroline and Jess are back together at last and have very little to show for their time apart. No insights or reflections, no hot takes; just more contributions to the hot cat/cartoon crush directory.

We also have plenty to say about our recent air travel experiences and the misery that is interacting with other people in flight. Airports everywhere are chaos, but there's something in our east coastal elitism that makes it especially unbearable to wait in a disorganized Italian queue.

Plus, some stories from Caroline's acting career, including her big break in spoken word and a web series Jess fan-girled.

Why does it seem like your friend wants you to lust after her new guy? Why doesn't he keep salt in his home? We don't have the answers, but we do have the giggles. Leave us a five star review.

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This episode was edited by none other than our prince, Abi Newhouse. DM her for your audio editing needs!

__

Share with a friend! Subscribe and rate us on your favorite podcasting app! Review us on Apple Podcasts!

SUBSCRIBE on ⁠YouTube⁠ for full episode video.

And FOLLOW US on Instagram for more:

@not4everyonepod

@thegoodsitter

@jzdebakey

__

Intro Music: “Doja Dance” by PALA

DISCLAIMER: All opinions are our own. We are not therapists or health professionals, or professional of any kind, really. Please see your own professional or counselor for professional support. Do your research and be safe!

In her final days before turning 32, Jess reflects on what it means to be fun, especially having been a late bloomer in a lot of aspects of traditional American life. Somehow it's been both a help and a hindrance to her self confidence - who else wants their mommy whenever they enter a sketchy club or party? Children of immigrants please stand up!

This leads into an exploration of two age-old questions: first, how to conceptualize regret, and next, how to tell the difference between anxiety and intuition. Jess has touched on these topics before and promised to provide links, so here they are:

No boring dudes meet 🤝 more boring relationships! Plus, a nod to Love Island and an update on her creative projects - including a recent behavioral health industry podcast Mind Your Business. The content never ends; follow Jess on threads!

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Share with a friend! Subscribe and rate us on your favorite podcasting app! Review us on Apple Podcasts!

SUBSCRIBE on ⁠YouTube⁠ for full episode video.

And FOLLOW US on Instagram for more:

@not4everyonepod

@thegoodsitter

@jzdebakey

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Intro Music: “Doja Dance” by PALA

DISCLAIMER: All opinions are our own. We are not therapists or health professionals, or professional of any kind, really. Please see your own professional or counselor for professional support. Do your research and be safe!