This week on One Bad Mother, Biz and Theresa wonder if time-outs actually work and wonder how bad WE have to get for someone to send US to our rooms. Plus, Biz sets her kitchen on fire, Theresa takes a dive, and the creator of the 'Dirt and Boogers' blog helps us to stop yelling at our kids. 

Biz and Theresa tackle the tangled topic of hair! To cut or not to cut, that is the question. The answer is “no one cares.” Plus, Biz Leaves It To Beaver, Theresa totally eats it in this week’s fails, and we get outdoorsy with Peter Brown Hoffmeister, author of Let Them Be Eaten By Bears, a book about getting you and your kids into the great wide outside!

Biz and Theresa wonder why "letting go" feels so great but "giving up" makes us feel like losers? Clearly we're having trouble deciding whether our glass of wine is half-full or half-empty. Plus, Biz offers a refuge for tired moms and Theresa comforts her child with sugar. And we explore being married to the military with Lisa Smith Molinari of the blog The Meat and Potatoes of Life.

We call bullshit on the "to do list" when none of the ten thousand things we do as a parent everyday counts as a thing we can cross off. Plus, Biz comes to the realization that any problems her kids have may not actually be her fault, Theresa plays mind games with Simon, a listener fails when she realizes the cock her son wants to know about isn’t a rooster, and we talk to Sally Hepworth about her debut novel, The Secrets of Midwives.

This week, Biz and Theresa forgot to put the kids back in the fridge and they’ve gone SPOILED ROTTEN! Can a young child really be spoiled? Or is it just one of those descriptions we found so easy to toss around before we had kids and discovered that our expectations may be out of whack? DO YOU MEAN TO TELL ME THAT THIS 4-YEAR-OLD ISN'T ABLE TO BE POLITE AND GRATEFUL AT ALL TIMES? SPOILED! (IT MUST BE THE PARENTS' FAULT!) Plus, Biz decides to let her 5-year-old off the hook this week, and Theresa would love it if we could all get together and stop this Measles outbreak! Wooooooooo!

Biz and Theresa make predictions about what life will be like when our kids become teens (...our conversation quickly turns to porn). Plus, Biz poses the question, "Which is worse: when your partner has a hard time with the kids, or when he says they had a blast?" Theresa finds a way to make early mornings marginally better, and we hear an amazing listener-call-in fail involving a small child with a fake moustache. Dr. Jennifer Wider returns to give us advice on dealing with teens and talks about her latest book, Got Teens?: The Doctor Moms’ Guide to Sexuality, Social Media, and Other Adolescent Realities.

Biz and Theresa tackle the deepest of parenting topics…strollers. Have strollers become the symbol of all things evil about moms? Plus, the universe does not want Biz to enjoy a hamburger, Theresa is her own chiropractor, and we talk to super-edgy renaissance woman Michelle Tea about going through IVF as a lesbian, her new memoir How To Grow Up, and her kick-ass online publication Mutha Magazine. 

Biz and Theresa accidentally gain new insight into ourselves this week! OOPS! We talk about our self-confidence and what happens to it after we become parents. (Hint: It may get shit on.) Plus, Biz discovers there's even MORE she didn't know about her kids' teeth, Theresa blows Biz’s mind with a trip to the spa, and we enjoy a much-needed laugh at parenting with Johanna Stein and her funny new book, How Not To Calm A Child On A Plane.

Biz and Theresa get a visit from the Tooth Fairy and discover we're totally unprepared for both the high emotional cost and high monetary cost of a baby tooth these days! Also, Theresa learns all you need is a box and an imagination to lose your mind, Biz has a bright idea that's a failure, and a listener’s rant reminds us that 90 percent of parenting is having to do something you don't want to do. Plus, our guest, Dr. Gloria Walther, is an Early Childhood Development expert and she drops crazy knowledge bombs on us! She helps us with a range of common issues we confront with 3- to 5-year-olds, like sharing, listening, telling the truth, and more. Seriously, you do not want to miss her!

Biz and Theresa discover that change is hard, especially when that change is your precious child starts lying to you...without the courtesy of being any good at it! Sadly, this isn’t one of those phases you can ignore in hopes they will grow out of it, much to Theresa’s dismay. Clearly, the only answer is putting the fear of God into them. No chance of future issues with that solution. Plus, a genius listener leans ON instead of leaning IN and we talk with Jennifer Oxley, co-creator of the PBS Kids show Peg + Cat, who puts a new spin on night wakings with a newborn!