Pillow Talks

If you were raised in Purity Culture, you already know how challenging it can be to overcome now that you’re an adult. You spent years being taught that it’s important for you to be wholesome, that pleasure is sinful, and that there are very specific rules you need to follow.

In this episode, we’re sharing stories from people who were raised in Purity Culture, and giving you step-by-step tips for overcoming shame.

Links and Resources:

Reignite your love life in just 7 days? ➡︎ https://shop.vmtherapy.com/your-best-week-ever/?ref=podcast-191&utm_term=podcast-191

Treat Your Partner to the Best F0replay they've ever had: https://shop.vmtherapy.com/foreplay-guides-2022/?ref=podcast-191&utm_term=podcast-191

Check out our NYT best selling book Sex Talks: ➡︎ https://sextalksbook.com/?ref=podcast-191&utm_term=podcast-191

Connect with us! 👋

Instagram ➡︎ https://instagram.com/vanessaandxander

Our VIP Email list: ➡︎ https://vmtherapy.com/subscribe

If you enjoyed this episode, make sure to subscribe for your weekly double date full of totally doable sex tips, practical relationship advice, hilarious and honest stories of what really goes on behind closed bedroom doors and so much more. It's the sex education you wish you had!

This episode is brought to you by…

Thanks ZocDoc. Go to Zocdoc.com/pillow and download the Zocdoc app to sign-up for FREE and book a top-rated doctor.

Thanks Cozy Earth. Go to cozyearth.com/pillowtalks and use code PILLOWTALKS for an exclusive discount for up to 40% off.

Thanks Dipsea. Get a 30 day free trial when you go to DipseaStories.com/pillow

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Have you ever wanted something from your partner, but found yourself wondering, “Am I asking too much?” Or has your partner ever asked you for something that didn’t feel reasonable to you?

We asked our community to share some of their questionable relationship requests, and the responses were fascinating! Tune in as we break down the line between what’s reasonable, what’s ridiculous, and what’s simply part of being in a relationship.

Links & Resources:

Your Best Week Ever is designed to give the maximum impact for minimum effort. ****Ready to reignite your love life in just 7 days? ➡︎ https://shop.vmtherapy.com/your-best-week-ever/?ref=podcast-190&utm_term=podcast-190

Treat Your Partner to the Best F0replay they've ever had: https://shop.vmtherapy.com/foreplay-guides-2022/?ref=podcast-190&utm_term=podcast-190

Check out our NYT best selling book Sex Talks: ➡︎ https://sextalksbook.com/?ref=podcast-190&utm_term=podcast-190

Connect with us! 👋

Instagram ➡︎ https://instagram.com/vanessaandxander

Our VIP Email list: ➡︎ https://vmtherapy.com/subscribe

Thanks Remi. Head to shopremi.com/PILLOW and use code PILLOW to save up to 50%.

Thanks OneSkin. Get started today with 15% off using code PILLOW at oneskin.co.

Thanks Orgain. Head to Orgain.com/PILLOW and use code PILLOW for 30% off your order.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It’s officially 2025 and you might be feeling like your relationship could use a fresh start.

We asked our Instagram audience if they’ve ever wished for a fresh start in their relationship—and the responses came pouring in! We’re reading through your submissions, sharing our thoughts, and offering practical advice for anyone looking to refresh their connection with their partner.

Whether you’re dealing with intimacy, post-pregnancy, or even income issues, we’ve got you covered with tips to help you and your partner move forward and rekindle that spark.

Links & Resources:

Reignite your love life in just 7 days? ➡︎ https://shop.vmtherapy.com/your-best-week-ever/?ref=podcast-188&utm_term=podcast-188

Treat Your Partner to the Best F0replay they've ever had: https://shop.vmtherapy.com/foreplay-guides-2022/?ref=podcast-188&utm_term=podcast-188

Check out our NYT best selling book Sex Talks: ➡︎ https://sextalksbook.com/?ref=podcast-188&utm_term=podcast-188

Connect with us! 👋 Instagram ➡︎ https://instagram.com/vanessaandxander Our VIP Email list: ➡︎ https://vmtherapy.com/subscribe

Thanks Hungryroot. That’s Hungryroot.com/pillow, to get 40% off your first box and a free item of your choice for life.

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We were feeling inspired… The Ultimatum is back on Netflix, and it was wild. It left us wondering if our own audience has ever given (or been given) a relationship ultimatum, so we asked!

In this episode, we’re breaking down your ultimatums and sharing our opinions and advice. If you’ve ever considered giving an ultimatum - or if you’re just curious about the ones other people have issued - this is a must-listen!

Links & Resources:

Reignite your love life in just 7 days? ➡︎ https://shop.vmtherapy.com/your-best-week-ever/?ref=podcast-188&utm_term=podcast-188

Treat Your Partner to the Best F0replay they've ever had: https://shop.vmtherapy.com/foreplay-guides-2022/?ref=podcast-188&utm_term=podcast-188

Check out our NYT best selling book Sex Talks: ➡︎ https://sextalksbook.com/?ref=podcast-188&utm_term=podcast-188

Connect with us! 👋 Instagram ➡︎ https://instagram.com/vanessaandxander Our VIP Email list: ➡︎ https://vmtherapy.com/subscribe

Thanks OneSkin. Get started today with 15% off using code PILLOW at oneskin.co.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Tis the Season for DRAMA!

We’re so excited to bring you another hilarious “Am I The Asshole?” episode this week. In the theme of the season, we’re doing another holiday edition.

We’re talking about affairs, secret Santa mishaps, and a disastrous salmon situation. Get ready to grab your coziest blanket and cup of cocoa for this new episode of one of our favorite series!

Links & Resources:

Join our VIP email list

Follow us on Instagram

If you enjoyed this episode, make sure to subscribe for your weekly double date full of totally doable sex tips, practical relationship advice, hilarious and honest stories of what really goes on behind closed bedroom doors and so much more. It's the sex education you wish you had!

Thanks ZocDoc. Go to Zocdoc.com/pillow and download the Zocdoc app to sign-up for FREE and book a top-rated doctor.

Thanks StoryWorth. Get $10 off your first purchase at StoryWorth.com/pillow

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

There are a ton of topics we want to cover on this podcast, but sometimes we just don’t have enough material to make a full hour-long episode for each one. So we’re trying something new to give you our hottest takes and tips… a multi-topic episode!

Today we’re talking about being non-hetero in a male-female relationship, period sex, and internal versus external processors. Think of this episode like a podcast tossed salad and get ready to dive in.

Links & Resources:

Join our VIP email list

Follow us on Instagram

If you enjoyed this episode, make sure to subscribe for your weekly double date full of totally doable sex tips, practical relationship advice, hilarious and honest stories of what really goes on behind closed bedroom doors and so much more. It's the sex education you wish you had!

Thanks Dipsea. Get a 30 day free trial when you go to DipseaStories.com/pillow

Thanks Miracle. Go to trymiracle.com/PILLOW and use the code PILLOW to claim your FREE 3-PIECE TOWEL SET and SAVE over 40% OFF.

Thanks Unbound Merino. Head over to their website unboundmerino.com where new customers can use our code PILLOW for 15% off of their order!

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Today we’re tackling one of the trickiest and most controversial topics we get asked about - porn.

Is it OK to watch porn even if you’re in a relationship? Can it become addicting? Can you forbid your partner from watching it?

In this episode we cover how porn affects you personally, pros and cons to bringing porn into your relationship, and what to do if you and your partner disagree. This is a topic that every couple needs to talk about in their relationship, so use this episode to open up a conversation!

Links & Resources:

Join our email list!

Instagram: @vanessaandxander

If you enjoyed this episode, make sure to subscribe for your weekly double date full of totally doable sex tips, practical relationship advice, hilarious and honest stories of what really goes on behind closed bedroom doors and so much more. It's the sex education you wish you had!

Thanks Chewy. Take advantage of amazing holiday savings and shop your personal favorites at Chewy.com/pillows.

Thanks OneSkin. Get started today with 15% off using code PILLOW at oneskin.co

Thanks Unbound Merino. Head over to their website unboundmerino.com where new customers can use our code PILLOW for 15% off of their order!

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Do you want more physical intimacy in your relationship? In this episode, we’re talking about different kinds of physical intimacy, why it’s so important, how to ask your partner for more, and what to do if you’re worried they won’t understand.

Links & Resources:

Challenge: Sweet Or Spicy

If you enjoyed this episode, make sure to subscribe for your weekly double date full of totally doable sex tips, practical relationship advice, hilarious and honest stories of what really goes on behind closed bedroom doors and so much more. It's the sex education you wish you had!

Go to Zocdoc.com/pillow and download the Zocdoc app to sign-up for FREE and book a top-rated doctor.

Thanks Jack Black. Go to GetJackBlack.com/PILLOW and use code PILLOW for 10% off your order.

Thanks MarleySpoon. Experience the most personalized meal kit today with Marley Spoon. Head to MarleySpoon.com/OFFER/PILLOW and use code PILLOW for up to 25 FREE meals!

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Do you want more emotional intimacy in your relationship? In today’s episode, we’re covering what emotional intimacy actually is, how to get more of it in your relationship, and even what to do if your partner doesn’t understand what you want.

Links & Resources:

Challenge: Sweet Or Spicy

If you enjoyed this episode, make sure to subscribe for your weekly double date full of totally doable sex tips, practical relationship advice, hilarious and honest stories of what really goes on behind closed bedroom doors and so much more. It's the sex education you wish you had!

Thanks Dipsea. Get a 30 day free trial when you go to DipseaStories.com/pillow

Get started today with 15% off using code PILLOW at oneskin.co

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What happens when you have a fantasy that your partner is just not into?

When your “yum” is their “yuck” if you will.

We asked our IG community for stories about times when their partner wanted to try something they weren’t into, or vice versa. Now, we’re sharing our best advice on how to handle the differences.

Links & Resources:

Sign up for our email list: vmtherapy.com/subscribe

Thanks Cozy Earth. Go to cozyearth.com/pillowtalks and use code PILLOWTALKS for an exclusive discount for up to 40% off.

Thanks StoryWorth. Get $10 off your first purchase at StoryWorth.com/pillow

Thanks Jack Black. Go to GetJackBlack.com/PILLOW and use code PILLOW for 10% off your order.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices