In today's episode of the Play Therapy Parenting Podcast, we're exploring choice giving. Choice giving empowers children by offering them opportunities to make decisions and exercise control in their lives. By providing choices within established boundaries, parents can help children develop decision-making skills, reduce power struggles, and foster a sense of ownership over outcomes. I emphasize the importance of setting mutually agreeable parameters for choices and I explain practical examples, such as allowing children to choose their lunch fruit or the timing of their bath. Through consistent implementation of choice giving, parents can create a healthy dynamic with their children, build their decision-making abilities, and minimize conflicts. Ask Me Questions: Call ‪(813) 812-5525‬, or email: [email protected] Podcast HQ: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/ My Newsletter Signup: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/newsletter/ My Podcast Partner, Gabb Wireless: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/gabb/ References: Cochran, N., Nordling, W., & Cochran, J. (2010). Child-Centered Play Therapy (1st ed.). Wiley. VanFleet, R., Sywulak, A. E., & Sniscak, C. C. (2010). Child-centered play therapy. Guilford Press. Landreth, G. L. (2002). Play therapy: The art of the relationship (2nd ed.). Brunner-Routledge. Bratton, S. C., Landreth, G. L., Kellam, T., & Blackard, S. R. (2006). Child parent relationship therapy (CPRT) treatment manual: A 10-session filial therapy model for training parents. Routledge/Taylor & Francis Group. Benedict, Helen. Themes in Play Therapy. Used with permission to Heartland Play Therapy Institute.

In this episode of the Play Therapy Parenting Podcast, I discuss a common parenting challenge: how to handle big emotions in kids, especially when they're directed at siblings. I relate a scenario shared by Heather from Florida, who struggles with regulating her own emotions while helping her three boys navigate theirs. I discuss the importance of reflecting feelings and understanding the underlying causes of behavior, such as feelings of powerlessness. Also, I give some strategies, such as choice-giving and limit-setting to address these situations. Ask Me Questions: Call ‪(813) 812-5525‬, or email: [email protected] Podcast HQ: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/ My Newsletter Signup: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/newsletter/ My Podcast Partner, Gabb Wireless: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/gabb/ References: Cochran, N., Nordling, W., & Cochran, J. (2010). Child-Centered Play Therapy (1st ed.). Wiley. VanFleet, R., Sywulak, A. E., & Sniscak, C. C. (2010). Child-centered play therapy. Guilford Press. Landreth, G. L. (2002). Play therapy: The art of the relationship (2nd ed.). Brunner-Routledge. Bratton, S. C., Landreth, G. L., Kellam, T., & Blackard, S. R. (2006). Child parent relationship therapy (CPRT) treatment manual: A 10-session filial therapy model for training parents. Routledge/Taylor & Francis Group. Benedict, Helen. Themes in Play Therapy. Used with permission to Heartland Play Therapy Institute.

In today's episode of the Play Therapy Parenting Podcast, we're diving into the first pillar of child-centered play therapy, which is reflecting feelings. This foundational skill is all about acknowledging and validating our children's emotions. Remembering that kids aren't rational beings, we have to meet them in their emotional world rather than expecting them to understand ours. By reflecting their feelings, we help them build an emotional vocabulary and effectively communicate their needs, instead of acting out their needs via unacceptable behavior. Through simple steps like starting with "you" and accurately identifying their emotions, we can make a big difference in our children's emotional development. I challenge you to try reflecting your child's feelings at least once a day this week and see the impact it has on your relationship. Don't worry if it doesn't go perfectly at first, just keep practicing. Feel free to reach out to me with any questions or scenarios you'd like advice on, and don't forget to sign up for my newsletter at www.playtherapyparenting.com for more helpful content. Ask Me Questions: Call ‪(813) 812-5525‬, or email: [email protected] Podcast HQ: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/ My Newsletter Signup: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/newsletter/ My Podcast Partner, Gabb Wireless: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/gabb/ References: Cochran, N., Nordling, W., & Cochran, J. (2010). Child-Centered Play Therapy (1st ed.). Wiley. VanFleet, R., Sywulak, A. E., & Sniscak, C. C. (2010). Child-centered play therapy. Guilford Press. Landreth, G. L. (2002). Play therapy: The art of the relationship (2nd ed.). Brunner-Routledge. Bratton, S. C., Landreth, G. L., Kellam, T., & Blackard, S. R. (2006). Child parent relationship therapy (CPRT) treatment manual: A 10-session filial therapy model for training parents. Routledge/Taylor & Francis Group. Benedict, Helen. Themes in Play Therapy. Used with permission to Heartland Play Therapy Institute.

I'm thrilled to be back on the Play Therapy Parenting Podcast after taking a little break. So, welcome to Season Two! During my hiatus, I've been busy launching training programs for clinicians and welcoming a new therapist at my center. Now, I'm excited to share some changes with you. In this episode, I announce a new direction for the podcast: it will be more curriculum-driven, offering you a "master class" in parenting based in child-centered play therapy. Today, I want to talk about the most fundamental concept in parenting: the understanding that kids aren't rational. It's crucial for us, as parents, to meet our children where they are emotionally and recognize that their feelings, not their brains often drive their behavior! By embracing this perspective, we can transform our interactions with our kids and build stronger, more empathetic relationships. I'm also considering adding a new Q&A segment based on your questions and scenarios, so feel free to reach out with any parenting dilemmas you'd like me to address. [email protected] or call (813) 812-5525 to leave a voicemail. Ask Me Questions: Call ‪(813) 812-5525‬, or email: [email protected] Podcast HQ: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/ My Newsletter Signup: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/newsletter/ My Podcast Partner, Gabb Wireless: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/gabb/ References: Cochran, N., Nordling, W., & Cochran, J. (2010). Child-Centered Play Therapy (1st ed.). Wiley. VanFleet, R., Sywulak, A. E., & Sniscak, C. C. (2010). Child-centered play therapy. Guilford Press. Landreth, G. L. (2002). Play therapy: The art of the relationship (2nd ed.). Brunner-Routledge. Bratton, S. C., Landreth, G. L., Kellam, T., & Blackard, S. R. (2006). Child parent relationship therapy (CPRT) treatment manual: A 10-session filial therapy model for training parents. Routledge/Taylor & Francis Group. Benedict, Helen. Themes in Play Therapy. Used with permission to Heartland Play Therapy Institute.

In this episode of the Play Therapy Parenting Podcast, I explore the analogy of a compass and how it relates to parenting. I delve into the fact that a compass doesn't actually point to True North, contrary to popular belief. This realization led me to reflect on the parenting journey, highlighting the freedom found in acknowledging that, just like a compass, we may not always be heading in the "perfect" direction. I emphasize the importance of understanding that parenting isn't about attaining perfection but about navigating with intention and the right tools. I encourage listeners to embrace mistakes, take responsibility, and apologize when needed, as it not only sets an example for children but also frees us from the unrealistic pressure of being flawless parents. By framing parenting through the lens of intentional direction rather than the pursuit of perfection, it's okay not to have a fixed, unwavering path. Follow me on Twitter: @thekidcounselor Podcast HQ: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/ My Newsletter Signup: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/newsletter/ My Podcast Partner, Gabb Wireless: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/gabb/ References: Cochran, N., Nordling, W., & Cochran, J. (2010). Child-Centered Play Therapy (1st ed.). Wiley. VanFleet, R., Sywulak, A. E., & Sniscak, C. C. (2010). Child-centered play therapy. Guilford Press. Landreth, G. L. (2002). Play therapy: The art of the relationship (2nd ed.). Brunner-Routledge. Bratton, S. C., Landreth, G. L., Kellam, T., & Blackard, S. R. (2006). Child parent relationship therapy (CPRT) treatment manual: A 10-session filial therapy model for training parents. Routledge/Taylor & Francis Group. Benedict, Helen. Themes in Play Therapy. Used with permission to Heartland Play Therapy Institute.

In this episode of the Play Therapy Parenting Podcast, I explore the profound meaning behind a Winston Churchill quote and its application to parenting. I delve into the concept of absolute truth, drawing parallels between the quote and the truths we encounter in parenting. I highlight three incontrovertible truths: Parenthood is a conscious choice and responsibility. When we decide to have children, we inherently accept the duty to parent them well. It's vital to shift the mindset from viewing children as burdens to understanding that parenting is a fulfilling obligation. Children require specific elements from parents—kindness, patience, consistency, and modeling behavior. I stress the significance of parents demonstrating the behaviors and traits they wish to instill in their children, establishing mutual trust as the foundation of a healthy relationship. Acknowledging personal faults and aiming to surpass generational patterns is crucial. I encourage listeners to evolve, improve, and be intentional about becoming better parents than previous generations, highlighting the importance of continual learning and growth. Even amid challenges, parenting remains a gift. I urge you to embrace gratitude for the opportunity to nurture and guide your children. The commitment to evolving as parents ultimately shapes not just our children's lives but generations to come. Follow me on Twitter: @thekidcounselor Podcast HQ: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/ My Newsletter Signup: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/newsletter/ My Podcast Partner, Gabb Wireless: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/gabb/ References: Cochran, N., Nordling, W., & Cochran, J. (2010). Child-Centered Play Therapy (1st ed.). Wiley. VanFleet, R., Sywulak, A. E., & Sniscak, C. C. (2010). Child-centered play therapy. Guilford Press. Landreth, G. L. (2002). Play therapy: The art of the relationship (2nd ed.). Brunner-Routledge. Bratton, S. C., Landreth, G. L., Kellam, T., & Blackard, S. R. (2006). Child parent relationship therapy (CPRT) treatment manual: A 10-session filial therapy model for training parents. Routledge/Taylor & Francis Group. Benedict, Helen. Themes in Play Therapy. Used with permission to Heartland Play Therapy Institute.

In this episode of the Play Therapy Parenting Podcast, I take a deep dive into praise vs encouragement from a child-centered play therapy standpoint. Building upon the previous episode's overview, I recount a conversation with a house parent at the Hope Children's Home who raised a question about a parenting approach he overheard. The person avoids telling his kids he's proud of them, opting for "what you did just brought me great joy" instead. While the intention is to encourage emotional maturity and other orientation, I explore why this statement falls into the category of "pseudo praise". I explain the importance of fostering an internal locus of control in children, emphasizing the dangers of external validation dependence. Drawing on research, including a longitudinal study, I underscore the long-term positive effects of encouragement over praise. I challenge listeners to break away from the pervasive praise model and become the antidote to the praise epidemic. Throughout the episode, I stress the significance of using encouragement consistently and provide practical insights for implementing child-centered play therapy parenting. Tune in for a deep dive into the power of encouragement and its role in raising resilient, internally motivated children. Follow me on Twitter: @thekidcounselor Podcast HQ: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/ My Newsletter Signup: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/newsletter/ My Podcast Partner, Gabb Wireless: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/gabb/

In this episode of the Play Therapy Parenting Podcast, we get "back to basics" of the Play Therapy Parenting model. I've shared an extensive range of insights over the last 124 episodes and as more listeners join the podcast family, I thought it was time to reflect on the basics. Recently, I had the privilege of conducting a 7-hour training of the house parents and staff at Hope Children's Home (https://hopechildrenshome.org/), a remarkable foster care agency. The experience inspired me to reflect on the foundations of my approach and the child-centered play therapy model. This episode takes a deep dive into critical concepts. Kids aren't rational—they're driven by emotions, not cognitive reasoning. Understanding this shapes the approach to interactions. It's about reflecting feelings, offering choices, setting limits, and providing encouragement. The goal is always preserving a healthy relationship with our kids. If you're catching this for the first time or need a refresher, these principles are pivotal. They create a framework to interact with our children effectively. Remember, the relationship with our kids stands above all else. In case you'd like to get in touch, feel free to reach out at [email protected]. I'm here to support you. Mentioned in this episode:

• Hope Children's Home - https://hopechildrenshome.org/
• Rules of Thumb all come from Child parent relationship therapy (CPRT) treatment manual: A 10-session filial therapy model for training parents by Bratton, S. C., Landreth, G. L., Kellam, T., & Blackard, S. R. (2006)

Follow me on Twitter: @thekidcounselor Podcast HQ: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/ My Newsletter Signup: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/newsletter/ My Podcast Partner, Gabb Wireless: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/gabb/ References: Cochran, N., Nordling, W., & Cochran, J. (2010). Child-Centered Play Therapy (1st ed.). Wiley. VanFleet, R., Sywulak, A. E., & Sniscak, C. C. (2010). Child-centered play therapy. Guilford Press. Landreth, G. L. (2002). Play therapy: The art of the relationship (2nd ed.). Brunner-Routledge. Bratton, S. C., Landreth, G. L., Kellam, T., & Blackard, S. R. (2006). Child parent relationship therapy (CPRT) treatment manual: A 10-session filial therapy model for training parents. Routledge/Taylor & Francis Group. Benedict, Helen. Themes in Play Therapy. Used with permission to Heartland Play Therapy Institute.

I frequently hear from parents something along the line of "My kid is so manipulative!" I'd like to challenge the notion that kids are manipulating parents and others around them and give you a new perspective and re-frame for you what exactly kids are doing that parents interpret as being manipulative. In this episode of the podcast, I discuss the following topics:

• The concept of abstract reasoning
• Organic, natural cause of "manipulation"
• Kids don't have alternatives when they are stuck in a pattern of behavior

Follow me on Twitter: @thekidcounselor Podcast HQ: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/ My Newsletter Signup: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/newsletter/ My Podcast Partner, Gabb Wireless: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/gabb/

Listener Stephanie emailed me with a follow-up question to my episode titled: "'I Hate My Life!' – What To Do When Your Child Says This, Or Other Shocking Things" and described a few situations where her 7-year-old son reacts with shocking responses, but the reflecting feelings process didn't work as expected. In this episode, I give Stephanie some follow-up advice on using the reflecting feelings skill with some advanced tips to help when it feels like reflecting feelings isn't working.

• The depth of the feeling impacts the recovery. The larger the emotion, the more time it may take for feeling reflection to take effect. It's not an instant fix.
• Enlarge the meaning
• You always reflect on the new feeling that was most recently expressed
• Bonus tip: Provide alternatives (later)

Follow me on Twitter: @thekidcounselor Podcast HQ: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/ My Newsletter Signup: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/newsletter/ My Podcast Partner, Gabb Wireless: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/gabb/