One of the hardest moments for parents is when the child who used to tell you everything, who they sat with at lunch, who their friends were, what made them laugh suddenly starts saying less. The silence can feel alarming. Many parents immediately wonder: Are they hiding something? Did I do something wrong? Are they okay?

But what if the quiet isn’t rejection? What if it’s part of growing up and becoming themselves?

In this episode, we explore the difference between privacy and secrecy, how to recognize each, and why understanding this distinction can completely transform your relationship with your tween or teen. You’ll learn how to stay connected without crowding them, support their independence without losing emotional closeness, and navigate the shift from childlike openness to adolescent boundaries with more confidence and less fear.

Jennifer's Takeaways:

• Understanding the Difference Between Privacy and Secrecy (00:00)
• The Role of Privacy in Teen Development (02:51)
• Balancing Parental Reactions and Teen Privacy (03:15)
• Handling Secrets and Alignment in Teens (05:28)
• Practical Tips for Parents on Managing Privacy (07:22)
• The Importance of Connection in Parenting (09:33)

Meet Jennifer Kolari

Jennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.

Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.

Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.

Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.

One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).