Social and emotional learning (SEL)includes relationship-based skills like conflict resolution, empathy and the ability to assertively set limits and boundaries. Because social norms and practices differ across cultures, experts emphasize the importance of culturally responsive SEL, rather than a one-size-fits-all approach. Students may feel excluded or even criticized if the social practices of their culture are far different from the social practices recommended by an SEL curriculum. In addition, those who do not find SEL instruction relevant to their realities are unlikely to apply these skills to their lives outside the classroom.

Culturally responsive SEL celebrates all cultures and situates learning within the cultural contexts of students. This is one reason that Conscious Discipline does not impose a one-size-fits-all curriculum. Instead, adults are the curriculum. They internalize the Powers and Skills, then share them with children through relationships, modeling and daily interactions. Adults have the flexibility to customize and adapt Conscious Discipline to fit their unique environment and the cultures represented in their learning community. In Conscious Discipline schools, teachers and students co-create the school climate, and teachers gain tools to examine implicit bias and foster unity and belonging.

In this episode, mother-daughter duo Aida Adnan and Tania Al Jaroudy talk with Dr. Bailey about implementing Conscious Discipline at My Little School, a multicultural school in Saudi Arabia. They also share their experience with paying it forward to two refugee schools in Lebanon after the tragic explosion in August 2020. Listen in to hear Aida and Tania’s story of culturally responsive SEL and being of service.

Essential Takeaways

•Conscious Discipline helps children learn that there is much more that unites us than sets us apart.

•Being of service is powerful for both the giver and receiver. What we offer to others, we strengthen in ourselves.

•Conscious Discipline isn’t something you can simply hand over to others; it starts with you. It’s an ongoing practice, and you always continue learning. It impacts all relationships and trickles into every aspect of life.

•The adult-first approach makes Conscious Discipline customizable and adaptable to any environment or culture. It is practiced in over 100 countries around the world.Important

Links

• Conscious Discipline Events (https://consciousdiscipline.com/professional-development/events/)

• Podcast: Will Conscious Discipline Work in My Country? (https://consciousdiscipline.com/e-learning/podcasts/podcast-episode039/)

• Seven Powers: Power of Unity (https://consciousdiscipline.com/seven-powers-power-of-unity/)

Product Mentions

•Conflict Resolution Time Machine(https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/conflict-resolution-time-machine/)

• Wish Well Board(https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/wish-well-board/)

• Understanding Trauma Webinar Series (https://consciousdiscipline.com/webinar-series-understanding-trauma/)

Show Outline

0:40 What is Conscious Discipline?

1:02 Introduction of topic and guest

1:51 Join Dr. Bailey in conversation with guests Aida Adnan & Tania Al Jaroudy

2:10 My Little School’s introduction to Conscious Discipline

3:48 Is Conscious Discipline culturally responsive SEL?

9:00 Being of service to educators and schools in Lebanon

13:01 What you offer to others you strengthen in yourself

14:16 Using Conscious Discipline during global pandemic

17:38 Conscious Discipline’s impact in all areas of life

20:07 Recap

21:56 What’s Becky up to?

22:09 What’s Becky celebrating?

THANK YOU FOR LISTENING There are many ways you could have spent this time today, but you chose to spend it with me and I am grateful. If you enjoyed today’s show, please share it with others via your favorite social media platforms.

Many classrooms and schools rely on systems of punishments and rewards, and these systems can be especially common for children with special needs. Punishment and reward systems provide external motivation to behave appropriately. They don’t teach social and emotional skills or problem solving, and they rely on judgment rather than personal responsibility. They foster separation instead of inspiring unity and connection. With Conscious Discipline, the focus is on blending effective SEL, school culture and classroom management to educate the whole child and teach new skills. This approach leads to increased connection, collaboration and compassion—and to lasting behavioral changes.

Of course, making this shift often feels scary or overwhelming at first. In this episode, Melissa McComb, the Director of Special Education in the Litchfield Elementary School District, talks about her district’s experience with moving from a points system to skills tracking. Despite initial doubt, Melissa and her district stayed the course and experienced phenomenal results. Listen in to learn more about Melissa’s journey and hear her top tips for other school districts.

Essential Takeaways

• One strategy to increase both teacher understanding and teacher buy-in of new systems is to involve teachers in their creation and development. In Melissa’s district, a group of teachers helped build the new skill tracking system.

• It’s important to check in with teachers throughout the process: How did that feel? How’s it going for you? What’s holding you back from doing it this way?

• Since shifting to teaching skills, Melissa’s district has experienced an 87% decrease in CPI holds and restraints. Students and staff feel calmer, secondary trauma is down, and a compassionate family culture is emerging.

• As the district’s understanding of Conscious Discipline expanded, they revisited and revised their new processes again and again. This is why we often call Conscious Discipline a journey: It is an ongoing cycle of personal growth, reflection, adjustment and action.

Important Links

• ConsciousDiscipline.com (https://consciousdiscipline.com/)

• Conscious Discipline Events ( https://consciousdiscipline.com/professional-development/events/)

• Webinar: Proven Success Strategies for Children with Special Needs (https://consciousdiscipline.com/e-learning/webinars/proven-success-strategies-for-children-with-special-needs/)

Product Mentions

• Understanding Trauma Webinar Series (https://consciousdiscipline.com/webinar-series-understanding-trauma/)

• Powers of Resilience: SEL for Adults Online Course (https://consciousdiscipline.com/e-learning/powers-of-resilience-sel-for-adults/)

• Conscious Discipline: Building Resilient Classrooms (Expanded & Updated) (https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/the-new-conscious-discipline-book-expanded-updated/)

Show Outline

0:40 What is Conscious Discipline?

0:57 Introduction of topic and guest

1:51 Join Dr. Bailey in conversation with guest Melissa McComb

2:40 Litchfield Elementary School District’s journey with Conscious Discipline

5:38 Teacher skepticism and buy-in

7:15 Results and success stories

9:54 Melissa’s tips for implementing Conscious Discipline

15:29 What’s Becky up to?

THANK YOU FOR LISTENING

There are many ways you could have spent this time today, but you chose to spend it with me and I am grateful. If you enjoyed today’s show, please share it with others via your favorite social media platforms.

Research shows that positive student-teacher relationships result in a more productive learning environment, improved peer relationships and increased academic achievement. However, the children most in need of connection are often the most relationship-resistant. Conscious Discipline gives educators the tools to see these children in a positive light, be present with them, find common ground and ultimately build a relationship that jumpstarts learning both academic and social-emotional skills.

Listen in on a conversation between Dr. Becky Bailey and educational consultant Brooke Haberle to learn how Brooke has successfully put these concepts into practice. Brooke shares inspiration, success

stories and key tips for connecting with challenging and relationship-resistant children.

Essential Takeaways

• Children with challenging behaviors need someone to see them differently. They want to feel seen, heard and understood. Making the conscious choice to see every child as capable and precious is an essential first step.

• At first, Brooke doubted that Conscious Discipline would work with challenging children. Still, she began celebrating small successes, providing encouragement and affirmation, and finding common ground to build connections. She was amazed and overjoyed with the relationships she built and the transformation she saw.

• Brooke recommends starting by noticing relationship-resistant children. Notice the child themselves, and notice all successes.

• Next, find their interests and meet them there. As the child begins to open up, you can gradually build a relationship and open the door to learning.

• When learning Conscious Discipline, approach new concepts with curiosity and playfulness.

• Study the concepts, internalize them, and play with them in ways suited to particular children and situations.

Important Links

• ConsciousDiscipline.com (https://consciousdiscipline.com/)

• Conscious Discipline Events (https://consciousdiscipline.com/professional-development/events/)

• Webinar: Guiding the Most Challenging Children with Master Instructor Jill Molli

(https://consciousdiscipline.com/e-learning/webinars/guiding-the-most-challenging-children/)

• Article: Creating the Habit of Noticing by Certified Instructor Jenny Spencer

(https://consciousdiscipline.com/creating-the-habit-of-noticing/)

Product Mentions

• Powers of Resilience: SEL for Adults Online Course (https://consciousdiscipline.com/e-learning/powers-of-resilience-sel-for-adults/)

• Conscious Discipline: Building Resilient Classrooms (Expanded & Updated)

(https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/the-new-conscious-discipline-book-expanded-updated/)



• I Love You Rituals Value Pack (https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/i-love-you-rituals-digital-

value-pack/)



• Rituales Amorosos (https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/rituales-amorosos/)

Show Outline

0:52 What is Conscious Discipline?

1:12 Introduction of topic and guest

1:53 Importance of student-teacher relationships

2:25 Join Dr. Bailey in conversation with guest Brooke Haberle

2:42 Brooke explains her role

3:12 Brooke’s introduction to Conscious Discipline

4:41 Example of using Conscious Discipline with relationship-resistant child (middle school)

8:47 Keys to building connection

9:18 Example of using Conscious Discipline with relationship-resistant child (younger)

12:28 Key Tip #1: Noticing

13:43 Key Tip #2: Find their interests

15:09 Approaching Conscious Discipline with curiosity and playfulness

16:57 What’s Becky up to?

17:34 What’s Becky celebrating?

THANK YOU FOR LISTENING

There are many ways you could have spent this time today, but you chose to spend it with me and I am grateful. If you enjoyed today’s show, please share it with others via your favorite social media platforms.

10.2 million children in the United States participate in after school programs. The best after school programs are comprehensive, fostering the self-worth of each child, developing social skills, and promoting respect for cultural diversity. They also provide learning activities, quiet time, recreation, and

developmentally appropriate activities that inspire problem-solving. These qualities closely align with Conscious Discipline, which can be implemented both during and after school.

Listen in as Dr. Becky Bailey discusses Conscious Discipline in after school programs with guest Cassie Gerst, who oversees after school programming in the Burlington Community School District. After implementing Conscious Discipline, Cassie’s after school programs saw an 89.5% reduction in office

referrals, a dramatic decrease in suspensions and removals, and an increase in staff retention. Cassie explains her implementation process and offers tips for others who want to embed Conscious Discipline in their after school programs.

Essential Takeaways

• The best after school programs are comprehensive and foster self-worth, develop social skills, promote respect for cultural diversity, and provide a combination of homework help/tutoring, quiet time, and physical activity. They also offer developmentally appropriate activities that inspire problem-solving.

• Conscious Discipline states that all behavior is communication. Children are communicating to us that they are missing a skill.

• Since Cassie oversees programs in several different buildings, she picked staff members from each building to attend the Conscious Discipline Summer Institute and form her Conscious Discipline Action Team (CDAT). In addition to developing training and professional development, the CDAT planned which rituals and structures they would implement in Year 1.

• The after school programs that implemented Conscious Discipline saw an 89.5% reduction in office referrals. Suspensions and dismissals from the program decreased, while staff retention increased.

• Cassie encourages other after school programs hoping to implement Conscious Discipline to create a plan for training and onboarding new staff, including shadowing and mentoring.

• Cassie also recommends that you look at staff strengths and weaknesses and create professional development to meet their needs. How are they feeling? Where are they in their journey? What is needed in order for staff to be successful?

Important Links

• ConsciousDiscipline.com (https://consciousdiscipline.com/)

• Conscious Discipline Professional Development (https://consciousdiscipline.com/professional-

development/virtual-professional-development-solutions/)

• Progress Assessment Rubrics (https://consciousdiscipline.com/free-resources/type/progress-assessment-rubrics/)

Product Mentions

• Conscious Discipline: Building Resilient Classrooms

(https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/the-new-conscious-discipline-book-expanded-updated/)

• Conscious Discipline E-Course (https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/conscious-discipline-e-

course-individual-registration-1-year/)

• Conflict Resolution Time Machine (https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/conflict-resolution-

time-machine/)

Show Outline

0:20 What is Conscious Discipline?

1:09 Introduction of topic: After school programs

1:30 Qualities of the best after school programs

2:55 Introduction of guest Cassie Gerst and her role

6:01 Cassie’s introduction to Conscious Discipline

7:55 Embedding Conscious Discipline into after school programs

9:52 Data and outcomes

13:05 Tips for other after school programs hoping to implement Conscious Discipline

16:36 What’s Becky up to?

17:02 What’s Becky celebrating?

THANK YOU FOR LISTENING

There are many ways you could have spent this time today, but you chose to spend it with me and I am grateful. If you enjoyed today’s show, please share it with others via your favorite social media platforms.

Punishment is defined as the infliction of pain or loss upon a person for a misdeed. Research shows that when children are physically or verbally punished, effects include increased child aggression, increased antisocial behavior, reduced academic achievement, decreased quality of relationships, and mental health problems. Punishment also fails to teach internal control of one’s own behavior (also known as self-regulation). A child who is punished may learn to control or hide a behavior when they are being watched, but they will not learn to regulate their own behavior when no one is watching (and the threat of punishment is removed).

For nearly 25 years, Conscious Discipline has offered alternatives to punishing children for misbehavior. Conscious Discipline is rooted in the belief that connection is the key to cooperation and that children need discipline, not punishment. Effective discipline requires us to recognize behavior as communication and to see misbehavior as a skill deficit rather than a sign of disrespect. In response, we teach the skills and strategies children need to regulate their own behavior for a lifetime—not just when someone is watching.

In this podcast, you’ll hear from Christiaan Baarsma, who has facilitated the implementation of Conscious Discipline at a high school for children with special needs in the Netherlands. When Christiaan arrived, the school lacked safety and had a culture of fear and violence. Christiaan transformed the school’s “punishment room” into a “connection room.” He replaced the system of punishment and rewards with a Conscious Discipline-inspired system based on connection, safety and empathy. Listen in to learn more about how Christiaan led this shift—and how school culture was transformed.

Essential Takeaways

• The American Academy of Pediatrics encourages parents to use discipline strategies (to teach skills) instead of punishment. Research shows that punishment has a negative impact on mental health, academic achievement, and relationships.

• Punishment does not teach internal control of one’s own behavior (self-regulation), and our most vulnerable children are punished at disproportionately high rates.

• The goal is to help children be successful as opposed to punishing them for the skills they lack.

• When Christiaan first implemented Conscious Discipline, most children arrived in the survival state. Today, after making connections and learning self-regulatory strategies, most come to the room in the emotional state. The school feels safer, and children are more willing to ask for help.

Important Links

• ConsciousDiscipline.com (https://consciousdiscipline.com/)

• The Basics of the Conscious Discipline Brain State Model (https://consciousdiscipline.com/the-basics-of-the-conscious-discipline-brain-state-model/)

• Conscious Discipline and Consequences (https://consciousdiscipline.com/e-learning/podcasts/podcast-episode027/)

• Building Safety and Connection with High School Students (https://consciousdiscipline.com/e-learning/podcasts/podcast-episode036/)

Show Outline

0:21 What is Conscious Discipline?

0:56 Introduction of topic

1:18 Definition of punishment and downsides to punishment

3:32 Introduction of guest Christiaan Baarsma

4:15 Christiaan’s role at the school and introduction to Conscious Discipline

5:56 How Christiaan began the process of shifting from punishment to discipline

7:19 From “punishment room” to “connection room”

10:05 Responding to initial resistance from colleagues

12:00 How Christiaan’s school has changed

16:42 What’s Becky up to?

16:56 What’s Becky celebrating?

THANK YOU FOR LISTENING

There are many ways you could have spent this time today, but you chose to spend it with me and I am grateful. If you enjoyed today’s show, please share it with others via your favorite social media platforms.

At its core, Conscious Discipline is a relationship program. Our brain is a social brain that develops

through relationships. To change the brain for optimal learning, we must create optimal relationships.

No matter how you choose to weave Conscious Discipline into your classroom, school or district,

remember: As we improve relationships, we improve learning.

In this podcast, you’ll hear from J.C. Commander, a dean of students for South Euclid-Lyndhurst City

School District in Ohio. As the dean of students in a small district, J.C. wears many hats. Whether he’s working with students who are truant and their families, coaching basketball, or teaching breathing strategies to young children, J.C. puts relationships at the forefront. Listen in to learn how Conscious Discipline has helped J.C. and his district prioritize relationships in order to optimize learning.

Essential Takeaways

• Often, the reason children miss school is relationship-based. They may have social issues or lack

relationships with their teachers. In other cases, it’s helpful to work with parents to establish a

routine that helps children successfully get up and get to school in the morning.

• Athletics are a great way to build relationships with students through common interests.

• With older children, a Friends and Family Board can serve as motivation. Students revisit photos

of their parents or other family members as a reminder of their “why.”

• In your first year implementing Conscious Discipline, it’s OK to choose a few key areas of focus

and a few structures you’d like to implement. J.C. initially focused on routines and relationships,

and he implemented the Wish Well, Greetings and Friends and Family Board. He also helped

students learn Conscious Discipline deep breathing techniques, with great results.

Important Links

• ConsciousDiscipline.com (https://consciousdiscipline.com/)

• Wish Well Ritual (https://consciousdiscipline.com/free-resources/shubert/shuberts-

classroom/wish-well-ritual/)

• S.T.A.R. (https://consciousdiscipline.com/free-resources/shubert/shuberts-classroom/s-t-a-r/)

• Friends and Family Board (https://consciousdiscipline.com/free-resources/shubert/shuberts-

classroom/friends-and-family-board/)

Product Mentions

• Conscious Discipline: Building Resilient Classrooms

(https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/the-new-conscious-discipline-book-expanded-

updated/)

• Creating the School Family (https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/creating-the-school-

family/)

• Wish Well Board (https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/wish-well-board/)

• Greeting Apron (https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/greeting-apron/)

• S.T.A.R. Breathing Tool (https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/s-t-a-r-breathing-tool/)

Show Outline

0:22 What is Conscious Discipline?

0:54 Introduction of guest J.C. Commander

1:54 Responding to truancy with relationship-building and Conscious Discipline

5:18 Building relationships through athletics

7:05 J.C.’s introduction to Conscious Discipline

8:25 Favorite success story

10:43 Success story with younger children

12:57 What’s Becky up to?

13:18 What’s Becky celebrating?

THANK YOU FOR LISTENING

There are many ways you could have spent this time today, but you chose to spend it with me and I am grateful. If you enjoyed today’s show, please share it with others via your favorite social media

platforms.

As a child, DJ Batiste didn’t have the skills he needed to behave or succeed in school. He was expelled from preschool and often kicked out of classrooms before becoming involved with gangs and increasingly serious trouble. During his senior year of high school, DJ’s life changed when he walked into

the classroom of Donna Porter, a teacher implementing Conscious Discipline. For the first time, DJ had a teacher who didn’t tell him, “Get out.” Instead, she connected with him. That connection paved the way for DJ to learn valuable skills that he continues to use today.

Listen in as DJ discusses the powerful impact of teachers, the vital skill of composure, and how teachers like you can connect with other “DJ’s” and change their life trajectory for the better. As DJ says, “Never

question the power you have as a teacher… You can choose to create more success stories and less statistics.”

Essential Takeaways

• If a child is told he’s bad often enough, he begins to believe that is who he is. The way we see children matters.

• Meet your students where they are, accept them where they are, and build. Your first encounter with a student may be a disrespectful one. It is how you respond that sets the tone for the relationship.

• Composure is the first skill of Conscious Discipline. Without it, accessing the other skills is impossible. Before attempting other skills, learn to quit taking student behavior personally and to compose yourself before responding.

• A great teacher’s true intent is to teach and not to punish.

 Teach discipline skills more than once, the same way we continue to teach academic skills until they are mastered. Give children a fresh start every day.

Important Links

• ConsciousDiscipline.com (https://consciousdiscipline.com/)

• Video: From Gang Leader to Graduate: A Conscious Discipline Transformation

(https://consciousdiscipline.com/videos/gang-leader-to-graduate-a-conscious-discipline-transformation/)

• Video: DJ Batiste Teaches “Words Have Power” (https://consciousdiscipline.com/videos/dj-

batiste-former-gang-leader-teaches-words-have-power/)

• Podcast: The Transformational Power of Connection with DJ Batiste

(https://consciousdiscipline.com/e-learning/podcasts/podcast-episode037/)

• Video: DJ Batiste Explains “Preschool Expulsions Lead to Destruction”

(https://consciousdiscipline.com/videos/dj-batiste-former-gang-leader-explains-preschool-

expulsions-lead-to-destruction/)

Product Mentions

• Conscious Discipline: Building Resilient Classrooms

(https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/the-new-conscious-discipline-book-expanded-updated/)

• Creating the School Family (https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/creating-the-school-family/)

• School Family Job Set (https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/school-family-job-set/)

• Brain State Poster Set (https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/brain-state-poster-set/)

 Seven Skills Poster Set (https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/seven-skills-poster-set/)

Show Outline

0:22 What is Conscious Discipline?

1:18 The power of teachers

2:14 Introduction of guest DJ Batiste and DJ’s story

4:15 It’s never too late to change the brain

4:53 Self-fulfilling prophecy

9:30 Learning new tools for managing student behavior

16:58 The skill of composure

20:18 Be persistent with teaching discipline skills

23:30 Give children a fresh start every day

25:23 What’s Becky up to?

25:58 What’s Becky celebrating?

THANK YOU FOR LISTENING

There are many ways you could have spent this time today, but you chose to spend it with me and I am grateful. If you enjoyed today’s show, please share it with others via your favorite social media platforms.

Episode Summary

I Love You Rituals are playful, one-on-one interactions that build loving connections while increasing attention span, decreasing power struggles and promoting language and literacy at school or at home.

These brain-building interactions facilitate optimal development for young children and create lifelong bonds between children and adults. If you’re interested in incorporating I Love You Rituals into your current classroom practices, you may wonder: Where should I start? How do I introduce I Love You

Rituals? When in the world do I have time to teach them?

Join Master Instructor Kim Hughes, a 30-plus year veteran of the education field, as she leads a session on making I Love You Rituals part of your day. Kim answers frequently asked questions about I Love You Rituals and shares valuable strategies and insight. As Kim says, “Conscious Discipline is not a second job. We weave all of this throughout the curriculum so you have a beautiful tapestry.”

Essential Takeaways

• The best exercise for the brain is exercise.

• The powers of Conscious Discipline allow us to see conflict differently, while the skills allow us to respond to conflict differently. The structures help adults and children practice the skills.

Without the powers and skills, putting up structures is merely “decorating your classroom with Conscious Discipline.”

• Everyone needs “joy juice.” Every child needs at least one adult to love and support them.

• Learn the I Love You Rituals yourself first, then practice them with children. Once children have practiced with an adult, they can do I Love You Rituals together.

• Teach ILYR on the playground, at centers, by having older children teach younger children, whilea child is on the changing table, etc. You can also incorporate them into your daily greetings.

• Start where you are comfortable, and celebrate your successes. Remember that you can’t implement everything right away. Breathe, take it slowly, and tell yourself, “I’ve got this.”

Important Links

• ConsciousDiscipline.com (https://consciousdiscipline.com/)

• Master Instructor Kim Hughes (https://consciousdiscipline.com/professional-

development/instructors/kim-hughes/)

• Free Resource: I Love You Rituals Teddy Bear Activity Board

(https://consciousdiscipline.com/resources/i-love-you-rituals-teddy-bear-activity-board/)

• Premium Resource: I Love You Rituals Choices Spinner

(https://consciousdiscipline.com/resources/i-love-you-rituals-choices-spinner/)

• Premium Resource: Choice Board-I Love You Rituals

(https://consciousdiscipline.com/resources/choice-board-i-love-you-rituals/)

Product Mentions

• I Love You Rituals (book) (https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/i-love-you-rituals/)

• I Love You Rituals Changing Table Set (https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/i-love-you-

rituals-changing-table-poster-set/)

• I Love You Rituals on a String (https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/i-love-you-rituals-on-a-

string/)

• Rituales Amorosos (book) (https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/rituales-amorosos/)

• Greeting Apron (https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/greeting-apron/)

Show Outline

0:20 What is Conscious Discipline?

1:28 Brain Smart Start

9:06 Relationship between powers, skills and structures

11:18 Introduction to I Love You Rituals

15:22 How to introduce I Love You Rituals in your classroom

16:58 When to teach I Love You Rituals

19:25 I Love You Rituals book (Family Night)

21:44 Where to start with I Love You Rituals

23:59 What’s Becky up to?

24:31 What’s Becky celebrating?

THANK YOU FOR LISTENING

There are many ways you could have spent this time today, but you chose to spend it with me and I am grateful. If you enjoyed today’s show, please share it with others via your favorite social media

platforms.

In any classroom, conflict happens. And that’s an understatement—conflict occurs every day, all day long. Research shows that in Pre-K classrooms, 60 acts of intrusion occur per hour. If you want to save time for learning and connection, teaching conflict resolution to young children is essential. With Conscious Discipline, we foster a willingness to resolve conflicts by building a School Family. Then, we teach healthy conflict resolution skills like composure, assertiveness, and recognizing and managing triggers.

Join Master Instructor Vicky Hepler as she leads a session on teaching conflict resolution in early childhood on this special episode of Real Talk for Real Teachers. With 37 years in education, Vicky draws on a wealth of experience as she shares actionable strategies, activities and coaching tips for transforming conflict and chaos to connection and cooperation.

Essential Takeaways

• For conflict resolution to be effective, we must foster the seeds of willingness by establishing a School Family. From there, we can teach even the most challenging children to resolve conflicts in a healthy manner.

• Conflict is an opportunity to teach children a better way to communicate, resolve problems and meet their needs.

• Children are developmentally programmed to seek help from adults. When a child tattles, he or she is telling us, “I need help. I don’t know what to do.” This is an opportunity to teach children how to use their assertive Big Voice.

• With their Big Voices, children teach others how they want to be treated, a vital lifelong skill.

• We teach children to use their Big Voice in the moment that conflict occurs. We also help them identify triggers and find strategies to use when they are triggered. Don’t forget to celebrate when your students use their Big Voice!

Important Links

• ConsciousDiscipline.com (https://consciousdiscipline.com/)

• Master Instructor Vicky Hepler (https://consciousdiscipline.com/professional-development/instructors/vicky-hepler/)

• Webinars from the Field: Conflict Resolution and Assertiveness with Older Children with Kristin Abel (https://consciousdiscipline.com/e-learning/webinars/conflict-resolution-and-assertiveness/)

• Article- Getting Over the Finish Line: Teaching Children to Use Their Big Voices (https://consciousdiscipline.com/getting-over-the-finish-line-with-big-voice/)

Product Mentions

• Creating the School Family (https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/creating-the-school-family/)

• Shubert’s BIG Voice (https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/shuberts-big-voice/)

• Sophie’s BIG Voice (https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/sophies-big-voice/)

• Shubert Visor (https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/shubert-visor/)

• Conflict Resolution Time Machine (https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/conflict-resolution-time-machine/)

Show Outline

0:20 What is Conscious Discipline?

1:15 Introduction of guest Vicky Hepler

2:20 Planting seeds of willingness for conflict resolution

3:12 Conflict happens all the time and is a teachable moment

5:30 Responding to tattling by teaching assertiveness (Big Voice)

9:30 Ideas for introducing conflict resolution to young children

11:12 Helping young children identify their triggers and how to respond

13:02 “Make your voice match mine”

14:59 Coaching in the moment

18:17 Celebrating when children use their Big Voice

19:44 What’s Becky up to?

20:33 What’s Becky celebrating?

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Conscious Discipline is both trauma-based and trauma-informed. It emphasizes optimal brain development for all children and adults, regardless of life experiences like chronic stress and trauma. There are three types of trauma: acute, chronic and complex. Acute trauma results from a singular instance, like a natural disaster.

Alabama Pre-K teachers April Carr and Hillary Spratlin were faced with restoring safety after acute trauma when a major tornado struck the small community of Beauregard. Both teachers leaned on the powers and skills they had learned from Conscious Discipline to be of service, help children identify and regulate their emotions, and focus on empathy and helpfulness. In this podcast, April and Hillary share the steps they took to help young students and their families heal after a natural disaster.

Read more about April’s experience with Conscious Discipline and restoring safety after a tornado in her article “My Conscious Discipline Journey: Taming Anxiety and Healing After a Natural Disaster” (https://consciousdiscipline.com/my-conscious-discipline-journey-taming-anxiety-and-healing-after-a-natural-disaster/). In the “Important Links” section below, access free resources mentioned in the podcast, including a social story and ritual plans for Safekeeping and Wish Well.

Essential Takeaways

• The goals of Conscious Discipline include helping children experience a felt sense of safety and authentic connection, teaching and modeling the executive skills needed to achieve goals despite obstacles and distractions, and empowering everyone to give and receive empathy.

• Acute trauma results from a singular instance. Chronic trauma is repeated and prolonged, and complex trauma is exposure to varied and multiple traumatic events.

• In times of stress or turmoil, being of service to others can help balance and regulate our internal state.

• After experiencing a major tornado, April and Hillary utilized strategies like home visits, Feeling Buddies, heart cream, Wish Well, an expanded Safekeeper Ritual, and a focus on helpfulness and safety.

Important Links

• ConsciousDiscipline.com (https://consciousdiscipline.com/)

• Teaching Missing Skills: The Power of Social Stories by Dr. Becky Bailey (https://consciousdiscipline.com/teaching-missing-skills-social-stories/)

• Free Resource: I Can Handle Scared Social Story (https://consciousdiscipline.com/resources/i-can-handle-scared-english/)

• Free Resource: Safekeeping Ritual Plan (https://consciousdiscipline.com/resources/safekeeping-ritual-plan/)

• Free Resource: Wish Well Ritual Plan (https://consciousdiscipline.com/resources/wish-well-ritual-plan/)

Product Mentions

• CLASSROOM EDITION: Feeling Buddies Self-Regulation Toolkit (https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/classroom-edition-feeling-buddies-self-regulation-toolkit-english-only/)

• I Love You Rituals Value Pack (https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/i-love-you-rituals-value-pack/)

• S.T.A.R. Breathing Tool (https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/s-t-a-r-breathing-tool/)

• School Family Job Set (https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/school-family-job-set/)

Show Outline

0:21 What is Conscious Discipline?

0:50 Goals of Conscious Discipline

2:13 Three types of trauma

4:01 Introduction of guests April Carr and Hillary Spratlin

5:04 Conscious Discipline implementation in Alabama

6:40 How Conscious Discipline helped during and after a major tornado

11:03 “How can I be of service?”

12:25 April’s home visits after the tornado

17:13 Extended Safekeeper Ritual upon returning to school

22:26 How Hillary addressed the tornado with her students

26:36 Making “safety bags”

28:22 Focusing on helpfulness and being of service

32:23 What’s Becky up to?

34:13 What’s Becky celebrating?