Rebel Buddhist

In this episode, I talk about the idea that clarity is some passive “aha” moment that just falls into our lap, when in reality, clarity is an active decision that we must all make. Listen to find out why we all need clarity, and what you can do when you think you’ve found clarity, but suddenly, good ol’ doubt starts to creep back in.

P.S. Be sure to grab the Rebel Buddhist Toolkit I created at RebelBuddhist.com. It has all you need to start creating a life of more freedom, adventure, and purpose. You’ll also get access to the Rebel Buddhist FB group, and tune in weekly when I go live on new topics.

I was thinking how maybe like 5 years ago, I would have done the damn episode, thinking I had more of an obligation to crank one out that spend time with my kid, or to try and sleep, because it was “work” and I was the primary breadwinner, so no excuses in order to provide.

I’m really grateful that now I have so much more clarity about how to prioritize my life, but whew…being raised by an immigrant Filipinx mama who sacrificed so much for me makes choosing self care and small precious moments hard to choose over work sometimes

// How to stop avoiding thinking about death – and how to instead acknowledge what facing it can teach you about living now

// A few ways to shift your mindset about impermanence + use it to mentally reframe your own narrative 

// About one of my biggest regrets in life and some life-altering decisions I made along the way – how they pushed me to create the life I wanted and live in integrity

// Why your fear of death is actually your deeper fear that you have not lived your truest life (Steve Chandler)

// How to stop putting off the things that make us happy for ‘another time’ and start living fully now

// Why we must recognize the preciousness of human life in order to take real action toward making the most of the time we have

// Join the waitlist for the Adventure Mastermind at AdventureMastermind.com and save the dates for the first retreat of the next round, sometime the week of March 25th in Baja, Mexico. Get clear about your unique Soul purpose and how to create a life that supports it during this one precious life we have.

// If you’re new to the squad, grab the Rebel Buddhist Toolkit I created at RebelBuddhist.com. It has all you need to start creating a life of more freedom, adventure, and purpose. You’ll also get access to the Rebel Buddhist FB group, and tune in weekly when I go live on new topics.

// Want to dive into this work on a deeper level on your own time? To study it and practice it together with a group of people with the same goals of freedom, adventure and purpose?

Check out Freedom School

 – the community for ALL things related to freedom, inside and out

Today we talk about how to write your personal manifesto and why it’s worth doing.

// Why you should bother writing a manifesto

// How to use a manifesto when you’re not motivated to do what you need to do

// Three questions that make writing one easy

// Something you can do today, right now, to get started

// Grab a copy fof the Rebel Buddhist Manifesto here

// Ep. 7: Know Your Values - The Rebel Buddhist Manifesto

// We recommend you use Canva for templates to use to make yours beautiful!

I’ve noticed that when I am aligned and mindful, I show up more often as the person I want to be. So that’s why I meditate when I don't feel like it, or when it feels like the last thing I have time for is to sit on my ass on my cushion.

What is devotion and where does it come from? And how can we use it when we aren’t religious?

Devotion can be a really loaded word for a lot of people and isn’t used a lot in the West. For me, devotion used to have a very heavy weight to it for me. Like it was a forced thing. A required thing. A burden.

We can look at it like a deep commitment, but even deeper than that, it’s a commitment to what we really love.

// Join the waitlist for the Adventure Mastermind at AdventureMastermind.com and save the dates for the first retreat of the next round, sometime the week of March 25th in Baja, Mexico. Get clear about your unique Soul purpose and how to create a life that supports it during this one precious life we have.

// If you’re new to the squad, grab the Rebel Buddhist Toolkit I created at RebelBuddhist.com. It has all you need to start creating a life of more freedom, adventure, and purpose. You’ll also get access to the Rebel Buddhist FB group, and tune in weekly when I go live on new topics. 

// Want to dive into this work on a deeper level on your own time? To study it and practice it together with a group of people with the same goals of freedom, adventure and purpose? Check out Freedom School – the community for ALL things related to freedom, inside and out

This week, I’m revisiting one of my favorite topics: Psychedelics & Spiritual Practice. I’ve used psychedelics in clinical settings and have found them to have a unique place in the treatment of mental health disorders. But I’m personally very interested in their use for spiritual purposes. Especially because, in my own clinical experience, many mental health issues have a strong root in spiritual and existential challenges.
 

When we really look at the intention for spiritual practice or use of psychedelics, Buddhism and psychedelics share something in common: finding that which frees the mind. And there are endless studies that prove that this may just be possible!
 

Listen to the full episode to learn how psychedelics can be used to benefit spiritual practice without relying on them for an escape or a temporary high. Plus learn the key to locking in those positive effects long-term.
 

* Be sure to grab the Rebel Buddhist Toolkit I created at RebelBuddhist.com. It has all you need to start creating a life of more freedom, adventure, and purpose. You’ll also get access to the Rebel Buddhist FB group, and tune in weekly when I go live on new topics.

In this episode, we talk about rites of passage: not just how we can celebrate external and internal moments of growth and maturation, but also how to overcome society’s biggest challenges we face as we grow towards our Soul Purpose.
 

Contrary to popular belief, psychological adolescence isn’t just confined to our teen years, and soul development isn‘t about age, or even external accomplishments. True psychological adulthood can’t be meaningfully defined as what happens in our 20s or what degrees we have or our jobs or our pay. 

It's about ziji, authenticity - knowing who we really are — to know where we stand, what we value, what we desire, what we tolerate and what we don’t — and to be able and willing to act accordingly, most of the time, despite the social risks. This takes a minute. 

Listen to learn: The 3 phases in a rite of passage; how to overcome society’s challenges to discovering our Soul Purpose; how to step into true adulthood, and more.

* Be sure to grab the Rebel Buddhist Toolkit I created at RebelBuddhist.com. It has all you need to start creating a life of more freedom, adventure, and purpose. You’ll also get access to the Rebel Buddhist FB group, and tune in weekly when I go live on new topics.

If you’re like me, after you finished college, you found moments in your life when your friendships with others changed. Maybe you wanted to grow and evolve spiritually, and they did too. But you’ve also probably walked away from friendships that, for one reason or another, no longer served you.

Some could see moments like this as a positive change, but for many of us, it can be really lonely… even before the isolation of the pandemic. And we’re like, “How the heck do we do that, again?”

I hate to break it to those of you who want shiz to happen spontaneously, but the key is to take some initiative. And maybe even (gasp) plan!
 

Another reason why people have a hard time making friends later in life is because of the stigma attached to putting yourself out there after a certain age. It’s also key to get over our initial shyness and actually ask for new people’s contact info.

Making new friends requires the same thing that most worthwhile things in life do - taking risks, being uncomfortable, letting go of what other people think of us, and cultivating the belief that we’re 100% worthy and lovable as we are - perfectly imperfect.

The assumption that accumulating things (homes, land, power, cars, the “right” body) leads to more happiness causes a lot of resistance to living simply in Western culture.

Ajahn Succito said, “wise renunciation goes against the current of gain.” So, if we really want freedom from the suffering that the mind creates, we have to be prepared to challenge the assumptions of gain and loss. We do that in this episode.

Renunciation about cultivating the intention to loosen our attachment and grasping, not just to material things and sensory pleasures, but also to self-obsession and unhelpful emotions, too. It’s about realizing that holding onto anything that’s impermanent only brings us suffering.

There’s nothing wrong with wealth itself. It’s the grasping at it that causes suffering - and the feeling that there is something missing when we don’t have it that creates suffering.

To genuinely develop renunciation, we need to go into the mind and heart. Meditation is a key tool for this because it is where an authentic, sustainable happiness can be found. To have a resource like this within us already is an important inner source of wealth and abundance.

Another part of renunciation is being able to discern our wants from our needs. If we investigate this, we’ll often find that our needs are actually quite simple. On the other hand, our list of wants is never ending.

The deep question we can ask ourselves is, “Does this possess me?” Letting go of that - of feeling we are lacking - IS central to our liberation.

What’s one thing you can commit to renouncing today? A grudge? A partner or colleague’s annoying habit? What possesses you? No judgment… just awareness, and a gentle invitation to let go.

P.S. If you’re new to the squad, grab the Rebel Buddhist Toolkit I created at RebelBuddhist.com. It has all you need to start creating a life of more freedom, adventure, and purpose. You’ll also get access to the Rebel Buddhist FB group, and tune in weekly when I go live on new topics.

One of the common themes I see with my coaching clients is a need/want to get so much done, but not knowing where to start. 

The to-do list and project ideas are endless and it all seems really important. And the really annoying part is that when we look at the lists and get overwhelmed, we end up doing nothing instead. The secret is that it’s NOT all as important as it might seem. 

So how do we narrow down that list and figure out what ACTUALLY needs to get done?

First, identify your big goals. Next, take a look at your to-do list and ask yourself, “What’s the ONE thing I have to do today to keep moving me toward my goals?” The same can be applied for any part of your life. What’s the ONE thing that really matters to you today?

P.S. If you’re new to the squad, grab the Rebel Buddhist Toolkit I created at RebelBuddhist.com. It has all you need to start creating a life of more freedom, adventure, and purpose. You’ll also get access to the Rebel Buddhist FB group, and tune in weekly when I go live on new topics.

This week, I’m hard at work studying for my post-doctorate certification from my amazing condo in Hawaii. But trust me… even though I feel like I’m livin’ the life on a tiny piece of paradise, the current events in the world and here in the U.S. are fresh in my mind. Especially since the beginning of the week was July 4th… a day that is supposed to represent freedom and equality.

Anyway, all of this has inspired me to bring back one of my Greatest Hits about massive action vs passive action and how that all relates to commitment… because if you’re like me, you’re definitely wondering how the heck you can take rebellious action to help those who are being oppressed and yourself.

First, a few brief definitions – massive action is keeping on taking action until you achieve your goal. No matter what. And massive action also produces a result – it’s not just thinking about something, for example. 

With passive action, you’re doing something but not creating a result. So, you might be reading or learning or studying – which feels really good. It’s like you’re doing something, but not in a massive action sense because you haven’t created a result.

So another way to compare the two is massive action is creating and passive action is consuming…taking IN information, or consuming your own thoughts about something (aka “thinking” about it).

As some of you know, I used to be an international climbing guide, taking people up mountains in the Himalayas and all over the world – actually climbing not just hiking.

When you’re going up a mountain, massive action is relatively easy to take, because the circumstances sort of force you to do it. For example, you have to get to the top, because the descent starts there and to retreat from where you are would be totally unsafe or take four times as long. So even though you’re scared, or your knees are bleeding and bruised, or you can’t feel your hands, feet, or your face because it’s so cold, you keep going.

But even in that scenario, our mindset plays a huge role.

You know what my climbing partners would say about me? I love climbing with you because you know how to suffer. Translation: when it comes to climbing, I know how to do hard things. Without whining or wondering why it’s happening the whole time. With climbing, I don’t get lost in how hard things are. I know these things are a PART of climbing, a part of achieving the goal. I just see what has to happen and I do it. I know the suffering is usually worth it (well, those are the thoughts I have about it).

On a climb, I’m committed, and the end being in sight – or the consequences of not making it being clear – make committing and taking massive action easier for me.

Many of you have likely had this experience too. Like having a baby (I used to be a midwife, so I know the courage it takes no matter how that baby comes out). You’re committed to the end result

Or on a more day-to-day level you can see it when you work for someone and you show up for work even if you don’t want to. You are committed to the work.

But in our lives, especially as we create more freedom and do things like become our own boss or start making our OWN plans and not just let others decide our lives for us, we are the ones who have to create that sense of commitment to the goal. It’s not as in-your-face as a mountain, and the end is not always in sight.

If we don’t show up for ourselves, often it’s not as consequential as…getting fired,

But notice: isn’t it interesting that we are willing to work so hard for other people’s dreams and be committed to working every day for them…but for our own dreams we can be so…wishy washy?

How many of you want to have more freedom in your life – financial freedom, freedom from our emotions that hook us, to be location independent, to create your own schedule?

That would be awesome, right? 

Here’s an important thing to remember: Wanting is a form of passive action. 

The definition of wanting is: “to desire something, to wish for something” NO ACTION REQUIRED.

This makes it easier, familiar, comfortable – and more preferred by our reptilian brain motivated by that motivational triad of seeking pleasure, avoiding pain and doing what’s easier.

But all wanting does is create more DESIRE to create what you want – not the actual result of what you want. So just wanting creates a bigger and bigger gap between what you want and what you have. 

More DESIRE for something that you’re not willing to GO GET.

Conversely, the definition of commitment is, “to follow through on a course of ACTION.” This is very different from wanting and other passive actions. With commitment, “action” is in the definition.

COMMITMENT is where you go from WANTING it (passive) to GETTING it via ACTIONS that produce RESULTS (massive action).

Let’s say you want to earn $100K this year, or to go on a round the world trip, or do a 3-month meditation retreat or a yoga teacher training – no matter how much we lament about how hard we’re already working or how desperately we want it, if we’re not taking ACTION that produces RESULTS, it’s passive action.

So I want to ask you again, a bit differently: When it comes to creating freedom, are you just wanting it? Or are you taking action, every day, to get it?

And are you committed to the end? For the long haul?

We often do so much to get towards something and then give up…right before the chips are going to fall and it's like watching it you’re thinking OMG all you have to do is ONE more step and then the chips are yours!

But we give up because often we expect it to be easier or faster.

I don’t want you to worry about feeling excited or happy or joyful. Or a big one I hear a lot from my clients is they want to feel motivated before doing something. Like the reason they’re not taking action is “I’m not motivated to do it.”

“Motivated” is NOT what you wait for to get shit done.

I want you to think about how you can feel COMMITTED, because while taking massive action can feel tiring, not achieving your goal is its own kind of exhaustion 

And remember that this doesn’t just apply to more “tangible” goals like a house or a job, to be more fit, or an income level or stamps in your passport – but it can also be applied  to spiritual goals – like more patience, more compassion, more kindness, to finally FORGIVE. Because there are things we can DO – actions we can TAKE to move towards those goals too, like a regular meditation practice. Retreats. Tong Len practice. Self-coaching (one of the many things I teach in Freedom School). It’s not just thinking about growing spiritually and wishing for it. We need to practice. THAT’s how we create results.

This episode will teach you how to not wait to feel motivated or wait until it feels “good.”

We walk about feeling COMMITTED.

// The subtle differences between massive and passive action

// Sneaky ways you’re likely engaging in passive action

// The importance of commitment in being able to take repeated action – and how to feel it

// Long-haul vs short-term commitment

// 4 things you can do to avoid passive action

// One question you can ask yourself to keep yourself out of confusion and into taking action every day towards your goals

// For ways you can take action to protect women’s reproductive rights, check out ReproductiveRights.org or PlannedParenthoodAction.org

// Did you know I lead silent mindfulness adventure retreats? Our next one is in Baja, Mexico in the week of March 26th, 2023. Save the dates. You will want to be on the early notification list!

// If you want to start integrating all of you into this one precious life we have, apply for the Adventure Mastermind. It’s Soul Work. Deep work. Important, necessary, and essential to what the world needs right now. Be a part of it.

If you’re remotely curious, apply. It will help you get clear, and then we can chat to see if it’s actually a good fit. Trust me – it’s an intense 6 months so I am just as invested as you are in making sure it’s an amazing match. Head over to AdventureMastermind.com and apply for the next cohort. We have 2 altered states retreats, weekly coaching, virtual retreats, and more. I’ve got you!

// If you’re new to the squad, grab the Rebel Buddhist Toolkit I created at RebelBuddhist.com. It has all you need to start creating a life of more freedom, adventure, and purpose. You’ll also get access to the Rebel Buddhist FB group, and tune in weekly when I go live on new topics.

// Want to dive into this work on a deeper level on your own time? To study it and practice it together with a group of people with the same goals of freedom, adventure and purpose? Check out Freedom School – the community for ALL things related to freedom, inside and out.