When Doctors Dont Have Answers: Self Advocacy with Jamie Lee

What do you do when your body knows something is wrong but every test says you're "fine"?

In this episode of Rebel Mama Pod, host Sarah Castañeda sits down with career coach Jamie Lee for a deeply personal conversation about neurodivergence, women's health, burnout, and learning to trust yourself when conventional systems fail you.

Jamie shares her experience navigating unexplained symptoms, brain fog, anxiety, hormonal shifts, mast cell activation syndrome (MCAS), and the frustrating reality of being dismissed by traditional healthcare providers. Together, they unpack the connection between ADHD, chronic stress, inflammation, and self advocacy and why so many women are forced to become their own researchers just to get answers.

This episode is a powerful reminder that self advocacy starts with trusting your own experience.

🎯 What You'll Learn: Why so many women feel dismissed in healthcare settings The overlap between ADHD, burnout, hormones, and chronic illness What mast cell activation syndrome (MCAS) is and why it's often overlooked How stress and inflammation can impact focus, energy, and mood Why self advocacy matters in both health and career How AI, Reddit, and online communities are helping people connect the dots

🧠 Topics Discussed: Brain fog, PMDD, perimenopause, and histamine intolerance Women's health gaps in conventional medicine Functional medicine and alternative testing options Long COVID, autoimmune conditions, and chronic fatigue Neurodivergence, creativity, and entrepreneurship Learning to trust your instincts when no one else understands your experience

🚨 Jamie Lee is hosting a free webinar on May 20th. During "The Exit Negotiation: How to Get Better Paid So You Can Be Your Own Boss", she'll walk you through the exact framework she uses to help clients leave their 9-to-5s financially, mentally and emotionally set up for success. To learn more, visit jamieleecoach.com.

📚 Resources Mentioned: Jamie Lee Coach https://jamieleecoach.com

LDN Direct https://ldndirect.com

23andMe https://www.23andme.com

🔔 Don't forget: 👍 Like this episode 💬 Comment: Have you ever had to advocate for yourself to get answers? 🔔 Subscribe for more conversations about ADHD, burnout, women's health, and self advocacy

Most productivity advice doesn't work for ADHD—but this does.

In this episode of Rebel Mama Pod, host Sarah Castañeda sits down with Dani Donovan to break down what actually works when it comes to ADHD productivity.

Instead of forcing yourself into rigid systems, Dani shares her toolbox approach—a flexible, realistic way to get things done without burnout, shame, or relying on last-minute panic.

If you've struggled with consistency, procrastination, or overwhelm, this episode will give you tools you can actually use.

• Why most productivity advice fails for ADHD

• The toolbox method that adapts to your brain

• How to identify your real resistance (not just procrastination)

• The emotional side of ADHD: overwhelm, burnout, perfectionism

• How to replace shame-based motivation with something that works

• Post-it note Kanban system on your monitor

• The D20 dice method to make tasks more engaging

• A simple framework to identify what's blocking you

• The Anti-Planner

• https://antiplanner.com

• https://adhddd.com

Hello! Enjoy this throwback episode of The Adulting With ADHD Podcast while we continue to work on fresh interviews for Rebel Momma Pod!

The Adulting with ADHD is now Rebel Momma Pod 🔥. We're exploring what's not in the brochure about neurodivergence, midlife and burnout.

New episodes dropping soon 👊

Productivity advice rarely works for ADHD brains, not because you're lazy or undisciplined, but because most systems are built for neurotypical consistency.

In this episode of Adulting with ADHD, Sarah talks with Robert Simms, founder of Embodied Resilience Wellness Clinic, registered social worker, Indigenous practitioner, and neurodivergent adult, about designing home and money systems that actually work with your brain, not against it.

Robert shares how discovering his own neurodivergence later in life reshaped how he approaches routines, finances, and daily structure. Instead of relying on motivation, discipline, or "just try harder," he explains how neuro affirming systems focus on variability, interest, energy fluctuations, and external supports.

They explore why traditional productivity advice often fails ADHD adults, and how small environmental tweaks, not willpower, create sustainable change.

In this episode, we talk about:

• What "neuro affirming" actually means in daily life

• Why consistency doesn't work the way we think it should

• Externalizing executive function with reminders, automation, and visual cues

• Removing shame and guilt from missed tasks and imperfect follow through

• Designing systems around strengths like hyperfocus and pattern recognition

• Why "inconsistently consistent" is a realistic goal

Robert also shares practical home and money hacks, including:

• Set it and forget it bill automation when financially safe to do so

• Simplifying bank accounts and credit cards to reduce overwhelm

• Creating small financial buffers for predictable emergencies

• Using visible, contained systems for everyday items like keys, wallets, and kids' clutter

• The five minute rule for task initiation

• Rotating routines instead of abandoning them when interest drops

One of the most powerful reframes in this conversation: your home should function like an accommodation. If the outside world isn't built for your brain, your personal systems can be.

Neuro affirming systems are not about doing more. They are about building support structures that match how your brain actually works, with flexibility, compassion, and less shame.

Resources mentioned:

Embodied Resilience Wellness Clinic – www.embodiedresilience.ca

Robert's weekly YouTube live series, "All Things Neurodivergence"

Follow Embodied Resilience on Instagram, TikTok, Facebook, and YouTube

People pleasing and rejection sensitivity are common struggles for adults with ADHD, especially in work and relationship settings where power dynamics and fear of disapproval are present.

In this episode of Adulting with ADHD, Sarah talks with licensed therapist Billy Roberts, owner of Focused Mind ADHD Counseling, about why people pleasing develops and how it connects to rejection sensitive dysphoria (RSD), trauma responses, and self worth.

Billy explains how many ADHD adults learn to manage fear of rejection by prioritizing others' needs, avoiding conflict, and taking on too much responsibility. While this can feel protective in the moment, it often leads to burnout, shame, and feeling disconnected from your own goals and identity.

Together, they explore how people pleasing shows up in daily life, from over apologizing and over explaining to avoiding honesty and self advocacy. Billy also shares small, practical ways to begin shifting these patterns with more awareness and self trust.

In this episode, we talk about: – Why people pleasing is common in adults with ADHD – How rejection sensitive dysphoria influences behavior – The "fawn response" and its role in relationships and work – Overcommitment, over responsibility, and over accommodation – Conflict avoidance and ADHD masking – How shame can make honesty feel unsafe

Billy also shares practical strategies, including: – How to recognize when you are people pleasing – Ways to practice being more honest in low risk situations – Why self awareness is the first step toward change – How telling the truth builds confidence and agency – Why learning to trust yourself supports healthier communication

If you often feel responsible for other people's emotions or afraid to speak up at work or in relationships, this episode offers a compassionate and realistic starting point for understanding why — and how to begin changing it.

Resources mentioned: Focused Mind ADHD Counseling Billy Roberts' upcoming book on people pleasing and ADHD Adult ADHD therapy and coaching services

Rejection sensitivity and communication challenges at work are often misunderstood, especially for adults with ADHD.

In this episode of Adulting with ADHD, Sarah talks with leadership coach and CEO of Collaborate Consulting, Trystan Reese, about how rejection sensitivity can affect workplace interactions and self advocacy. Trystan shares how understanding brain based differences can help people approach work challenges with greater clarity and confidence.

Together, they explore why asking for support can feel difficult, how fear of negative feedback can influence behavior, and how small shifts in communication can improve workplace experiences for neurodivergent employees.

This conversation offers a practical reframe: instead of focusing on what feels hard, we can focus on what helps communication feel clearer and more effective.

In this episode, we talk about:

• What rejection sensitivity is and how it relates to ADHD

• Why feedback can feel challenging in professional settings

• How to think through possible outcomes before making requests

• The difference between emotional discomfort and real risk

• Why preparation and practice support better communication

• How to align requests with shared workplace goals

• Why body awareness and regulation can help before difficult conversations

• How self understanding supports self advocacy

Trystan also shares practical tools and examples, including:

• A step by step approach for evaluating concerns

• Ways to request clearer expectations or meeting information

• Simple communication scripts for everyday situations

• Why practicing conversations can increase confidence

• How reframing internal narratives supports growth

If workplace communication feels stressful or uncertain, this episode offers a supportive and realistic approach focused on clarity, preparation, and self trust rather than fear or perfection.

Resources mentioned: Collaborate Consulting Trystan Reese coaching and training services Neurodivergent leadership and workplace inclusion programs

Clutter is often treated like a motivation problem but what if it's really a systems problem?

🎙️ In this episode of Adulting with ADHD, Sarah sits down with ADHD and autistic decluttering specialist and podcast host Heather Tingle, founder of Untangled by Tingle, to explore how home organization, dopamine, and executive function are deeply connected for adults with ADHD. Heather shares how her own experience living in chaos led her to create decluttering methods that work with neurodivergent brains instead of against them.

Together, they unpack why consistency can feel so hard with ADHD, how perfection based organizing systems create burnout, and how decluttering can become a source of safety rather than another area of pressure or shame.

💬 This conversation offers a compassionate reframe: instead of asking "Why can't I stay organized?" we can start asking "What makes my space easier to live in?"

🧩 In this episode, we talk about: ✨ Why traditional decluttering systems don't work for ADHD and autistic brains 👀 How dopamine and visibility affect motivation and follow through 🏁 Why finishing matters more than starting 🧠 How executive dysfunction impacts home organization 🎶 How competition, music, and time limits can increase momentum ❤️ Why emotional attachment matters more than logical rules 🪜 How small, bite sized tasks make decluttering more achievable

🛠️ Heather also shares practical strategies, including: ⏱️ How to "beat the kettle" or a song with a tiny decluttering task 📦 Why gathering similar items into one visible place helps ADHD brains 🤝 How body doubling and shared accountability reduce overwhelm 🎮 How turning decluttering into a game builds motivation 🌱 Why starting with the smallest possible step creates success 🗺️ How treating decluttering as a "side quest" lowers resistance

🌈 If clutter feels overwhelming, emotionally loaded, or impossible to maintain, this episode offers a gentler way forward one that centers dopamine, ease, and self compassion instead of perfection.

📚 Resources mentioned: 🎧 Decluttering Untangled podcast by Heather Tingle 🏡 Untangled by Tingle (professional decluttering services) 👥 Untangled by Tingle Declutter Community (Facebook group)

Stress, trauma, and nutrition are often treated like separate issues but what if they're all part of the same conversation?

In this episode of Adulting with ADHD, Sarah sits down with licensed nutritionist and author Meg Bowman to explore how the nervous system and nutrition are deeply connected, especially for adults with ADHD. Meg shares how her own Crohn's diagnosis led her into the world of mental health nutrition, and why supporting the nervous system is just as important as choosing the "right" foods.

Together, they unpack how stress and trauma shape the body's relationship with food, why consistency can feel extra hard with ADHD, and how nutrition can become a source of safety rather than another area of pressure or shame.

This conversation offers a compassionate reframe: instead of asking "What should I be eating?", we can start asking "What helps my body feel safe enough to eat?"

• How the nervous system and digestion influence each other

• Why fear, stress, and trauma can shut down hunger cues

• What polyvagal theory has to do with food and regulation

• Why traditional nutrition advice often doesn't work for ADHD brains How visibility, simplicity, and support can make eating easier

• The idea of "taking care of future you" with low-effort planning

• How community and shared executive function can reduce decision fatigue

Meg also shares insights from her book, This Is Your Body on Trauma, including:

• How trauma shows up in the body as inflammation

• Why chronic stress is linked to long-term health conditions

• A framework for understanding food, gut health, stress, and mental health together

• How to build a personal nutrition toolkit that feels supportive instead of restrictive

If food feels complicated, overwhelming, or emotionally loaded, this episode offers a gentler way forward, one that centers safety, nervous system regulation, and self-compassion instead of perfection.

• This Is Your Body on Trauma by Meg Bowman

• Meg's Substack: Nutrition Needs Nuance

• Meg's website: megbowmannutrition.com

Getting started can feel harder than the work itself—especially when your brain insists on finding the perfect system before you begin. In this episode of Adulting with ADHD, Sarah sits down with Russ Jones, host of the ADHD Big Brother Podcast, to explore what happens when we stop waiting for certainty and start jumping in sloppy instead.

Russ shares his late-in-life ADHD diagnosis and how burnout, depression, and the isolation of the pandemic led him to rethink productivity from the inside out. Together, Sarah and Russ unpack why ADHD brains get stuck in planning mode, how perfectionism disguises itself as "research," and why starting imperfectly is often the most compassionate move we can make.

This conversation is a grounding reminder that progress doesn't come from flawless systems—it comes from momentum, connection, and designing effort that your nervous system can actually tolerate.

• Why ADHDers often over-plan instead of starting—and how to interrupt that cycle

• What "jumping in sloppy" really means (and what it doesn't)

• How finite effort and timers can reduce anxiety around overwhelming tasks

• Why quitting is sometimes part of getting started

• The concept of felt accountability and why other humans make follow-through more likely

• How community, body doubling, and shared effort reduce shame and isolation

• Reframing productivity as something we do together, not alone

Russ also shares the heart behind his ADHD Big Brother approach—why guidance works better when it feels like support instead of authority, and how small, human-scale systems can help us finally tackle the tasks we've been avoiding.

If you've ever told yourself, "I know me—this won't work," this episode gently challenges that belief and offers a more hopeful alternative: start where you are, start imperfectly, and don't do it alone.

• Website: www.adhdbigbrother.com