Regulated & Relational

Is anxiety always something to eliminate? In this episode, Tracy Leonard and Ginger Healy explore a different perspective. Beginning with Ginger's memorable experience freezing during a live television interview, our hosts deconstruct what anxiety actually is, why our nervous systems respond so strongly to perceived threats, and how understanding anxiety through a trauma-informed lens can replace shame with curiosity.

Drawing on concepts from Dr. Wendy Suzuki's Good Anxiety, Tracy and Ginger challenge the idea that anxiety is always the enemy and invite listeners to consider what their nervous system may be trying to communicate. Included in the discussion, our hosts compare the differences between knowing you're safe and feeling safe, how anxiety functions as a protective brain-body response, the role of co-regulation in helping us navigate overwhelming moments, and why resilience isn't about avoiding anxiety but learning to move through it with support.

Quote:

“Validate the feeling without validating the feared outcome”  Tracy Leonard

Resources:Good Anxiety by Dr. Wendy Suzuki  Amazon https://a.co/d/07M7nTyB 

Bookshop.org https://tinyurl.com/4942d67m 

…or a local bookstore near you

Dr. Wendy Suzuki’s website: https://www.wendysuzuki.com/ 

In this episode of Regulated & Relational, Ginger and Julie explore key concepts from 7½ Lessons About the Brain by neuroscientist Dr. Lisa Feldman Barrett. 

Drawing from Barrett's research, they examine how many of her findings align with attachment-focused and trauma-informed principles, particularly in understanding how the brain manages energy, uses past experiences to predict future outcomes, develops through relationships, and continually adapts to its environment. While some of Barrett's conclusions challenge traditional views of brain development, emotion, and regulation, her work offers thought-provoking perspectives that invite listeners to reconsider how the brain truly functions.

“Nobel medicine prize goes to 3 scientists for shining light on brain activity” - AP Newshttps://tinyurl.com/54bayecc 

• 7½ Lessons About the Brain:

https://a.co/d/0541FTXE  (Amazon)

https://tinyurl.com/44fy56e6 (Bookshop.org)

• How Emotions Are Made:

https://a.co/d/01YlL2qm (Amazon)

https://tinyurl.com/7ejhrype (Bookshop.org)

…or your local bookstore

When you hear the word calm, what comes to mind? Sitting still? Being quiet? Not reacting?

In this episode of Regulated & Relational, Tracy Leonard and Ginger Healy challenge common misconceptions about calm and explore a deeper, trauma-informed understanding of what calm truly means. Rather than being about compliance or the absence of emotion, calm is revealed as a nervous system state that is rooted in safety, regulation, and connection.

Just as anxiety can spread, so can calm, grounded regulation. 

Listeners will learn why calm is often misunderstood, how trauma impacts our ability to access it, and why calm is less about controlling emotions and more about staying connected to ourselves while experiencing them.

"Calm isn't the absence of emotion. It's the ability to stay with yourself through emotion."  Tracy Leonard

In this episode of Regulated & Relational, Julie Beem and Ginger Healy explore anxiety through an attachment-focused and trauma-informed lens. Together, they discuss how worry, avoidance, emotional numbness, and perfectionism often develop as protective coping strategies, while also examining how these strategies can unintentionally keep us disconnected from ourselves and others.

Julie and Ginger help us understand anxiety is often less about eliminating fear and more about understanding what lies beneath it and share compassionate insight into the healing power of authentic connection, vulnerability, and relationship repair.

Resources Mentioned and Quotes

• The Dance of Fear by Harriet Lerner

• Relational-Cultural Theory (Judith Jordan)

• Attachment- and trauma-informed approaches to healing and connection

"It is not fear that stops you from doing the brave and true thing in your daily life. Rather, the problem is avoidance." — Harriet Lerner, The Dance of Fear

"You want to feel comfortable and so you avoid doing and saying the thing that will evoke fear and other difficult emotions. Avoidance will make you feel less vulnerable in the short run, but it will never make you less afraid." — Harriet Lerner, The Dance of Fear

"The need for connection in which growth is a priority is the core motivation in people's lives." — Judith Jordan

In this episode of Regulated & Relational, Ginger Healy and Tracy Leonard welcome nationally recognized special education advocate, speaker, author, and trainer Karen Mayer Cunningham, also known as The Special Education Boss®.

With over 30 years of experience supporting students with disabilities, families, educators, advocates, and school systems, Karen brings a unique blend of expertise, humor, and compassion to the conversation. As a USA Today National Bestselling Author of The Epic IEP™, Karen has become a leading voice in helping families and professionals navigate special education services and achieve meaningful outcomes for students.

Our hosts explore with Karen the importance of collaboration, advocacy, communication, and student-centered supports within the special education process along with practical insights for families and educators who sit at the IEP and 504 table for creating stronger relationships and better educational outcomes for children.

Karen's mission is simple but powerful: when we get it right for the child, we get it right for everyone.

Quotes:“All kids are RA - Ridiculously Amazing” KMC

“The hardest people to teach are adult learners” KMC

Official Website

Special Education Academy

Special Education Boss® with Karen Mayer Cunningham

• Apple Podcasts: Special Education Boss® Podcast on Apple Podcasts

• Spotify: Special Education Boss® Podcast on Spotify

• Buzzsprout (official podcast site): Special Education Boss® Podcast

Official Book Website

The Epic IEP™   

Official Academy

The Epic IEP™ Academy

• Facebook: Special Education Boss®

• Instagram: @specialeducationboss 

• TikTok: @specialeducationboss

• YouTube: Special Education Academy

• LinkedIn (Karen Mayer Cunningham): Karen Mayer Cunningham on LinkedIn

• LinkedIn (Company): Special Education Academy

In this episode of Regulated & Relational, hosts Tracy Leonard and Lorraine Schneider welcome Dr. Roberts Anda, co-founder and principal investigator of the groundbreaking Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE) Study.

For more than two decades, Dr. Anda's work has transformed our understanding of how early adversity impacts physical health, mental health, education, relationships, and lifespan outcomes. As one of the architects of the original ACE Study, he helped shine a light on the profound connection between childhood experiences and adult well-being, sparking a global movement toward trauma-informed practices.

Today, Dr. Anda reflects on the origins of the ACE Study, the unexpected reach of its findings, and the evolution of trauma-informed approaches across healthcare, education, social services, and communities. He also shares insights into where the field is headed next and his continued vision for creating a trauma-informed nation.

• ACE Interface: https://www.aceinterface.com

• Learn more about Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs): https://www.cdc.gov/aces

• Dr. Anda’s research publications: https://www.researchgate.net/scientific-contributions/Robert-F-Anda-39796848 

Quote from Dr. Anda, “The ACE Study didn't just change how we think about childhood adversity. It changed how we understand health, healing, and the importance of creating environments where children and families can thrive.”

In this episode of Regulated & Relational, hosts Tracy Leonard and Ginger Healy welcome Karen Buckwalter, a therapist, supervisor, trainer, and consultant with more than 30 years of experience supporting children, families, and professionals navigating complex mental health challenges.

Grounded in attachment theory and relationship-based healing, Karen has dedicated her career to helping people feel safer, more connected, and more supported. Her work emphasizes the importance of creating both a safe haven and a secure base for growth, whether working directly with children and families or mentoring the professionals who serve them.

Soon we have the opportunity to learn more from Karen as she will be a featured speaker at the Attachment & Trauma Network's virtual Building Resilient Communities for Children Conference September 17 and 18, where she will continue to share practical insights for creating stronger, more supportive communities for children and families.

Find Karen’s book and other resources mentioned in the podcast at the links below:

Karen’s website  - https://www.karendoylebuckwalter.com/

Karen’s resources www.karendoylebuckwalter.com/resources

Karen’s Book- Raising The Challenging Child -https://a.co/d/08H1bAbU

Karen’s Podcast The Attachment Panel:

https://youtu.be/w7AZoBFn774?si=q22UAteMxc5RLz7N

Trust‑Based Relational Intervention® (TBRI®)  - https://child.tcu.edu/tbri/

social media handles for tagging:

https://www.facebook.com/karendoylebuckwalter

https://www.instagram.com/karendoylebuckwalter/

https://www.linkedin.com/in/karen-doyle-buckwalter-2757593b/

Suggested attachment book- The Power of Discord: Why the Ups and Downs of Relationships Are the Secret to Building Intimacy, Resilience, and Trust by Ed Tronick

 https://a.co/d/0cvkAOCQ

Link to the Building Resilient Children virtual Conference: https://attachmenttraumanetwork.org/brcc/ 

Amusement makes us feel good, but sometimes something that is funny to one person may not be funny to the next person. Ginger Healy and Tracy Leonard explore the nuances of humor, the benefits of a good laugh, and the awareness one needs to avoid creating unintentional discomfort. 

True to the nature of being human, we each register humor a little differently as it filters through our personal histories and experiences. Tracy and Ginger reflect on our neurodivergent friends and how humor and sarcasm may not register as different concepts depending on tone of voice used and a sensitivity to unpredictability and emotional safety. In this discussion, Ginger recounts a conversation with her son that made her aware of the root meaning of the word sarcasm and its emotional impact. Her reflection visibly resonates with both hosts, serving as a reminder to pause and consider the effect of our words before speaking.

Amusement fosters connection, safety, and belonging, while sarcasm can sometimes function as protective armor that creates distance and emotional harm. By becoming more aware of how we use humor, we can choose forms of laughter that help people feel seen, safe, and connected rather than criticized or excluded.

“Humor is not the enemy. The invitation is simply - awareness.” Tracy Leonard

• Brené Brown’s Atlas of the Heart is available at Bookshop.org or a local bookstore near you.

Join Tracy and Julie for this week’s podcast episode focusing on the influential role comparison plays in our lives! Why do we compare? How does it impact our emotional well-being? How can we shift comparison into something healthier and more constructive? 

Drawing from research, personal experiences, and referencing Atlas of the Heart by one of their favorite authors Brené Brown, Tracy and Julie unpack how comparison shapes our inner and relational well-being.

• Brené Brown’s Atlas of the Heart is available at Bookshop.org or a local bookstore near you.

In this episode of Regulated & Relational Tracy, Ginger, and Julie come together to mark a significant transition for the Attachment & Trauma Network: the retirement of longtime Executive Director, Julie Beem.

Using this moment of change as a springboard, our hosts explore important elements of transition, both positive and negative, and the impact transition has on our bodies, our minds, and how we respond to and go about our daily lives.

Through both professional insight and vulnerable personal stories Tracy, Ginger, and Julie unpack what it means to navigate change in a trauma-informed, attachment-focused way—for ourselves and for the children in our lives.

Ginger Healy’s current children’s book, Stronger Together and other books authored by Ginger can be found:

Ginger Healy publications website https://gingerhealy.com/publications

Bookshop.org https://tinyurl.com/y8hcfscu