Same Team with The Freemans

Everyone should have the appropriate expectation that things in life won't always be easy or go your way. This is the same in marriage. Having harder seasons of marriage is a part of the journey a couple needs to accept. Now these harder seasons can come from two places: external circumstances and from poor interactions of your own making!

In this episode you will hear about the 3 changes that need to be made to better handle these hard seasons. The situation will be different based on whether it is an external circumstance out of your control or whether it is from a series of poor patterns that have formed between you. In both cases, making these 3 changes will allow you to handle the season with more togetherness and come out of it stronger.

Relationship Resources:

➡️ Level 1: "Prioritizing Us" is focused on strengthening your connection, communication, and fun "Love Deposit" ideas. LINKED HERE

➡️ Level 2: "Rebuilding Us" is focused on repairing and rebuilding after a harder season of marriage. LINKED HERE

🥇 Also if you have not watched the Couple Things interview with Shawn Johnson & Andrew East, make sure tune into this great interview about Navigating Happy and Hard Seasons of Marriage on YouTube.

Set aside all the things you DO in your marriage and answer this question. Is your heart more open or closed to your partner? It is easy to get stuck in all of the tasks and responsibilities within a marriage and even think that getting these done is the main goal. But what is your experience like most of the time? You can get all your tasks done, but have a heart that is closed off to your partner and you experience disconnection, distance, unappreciation, or even resentment.

The true goal in a marriage is to have an open heart because this is when you experience love, connection, joy, understanding, happiness, and fulfillment. In this episode you will explore this idea of living more with an open heart and get 5 steps to take to keep from closing your heart off to your partner. In the end, we are here to "adult" and get done what we need to, but it will really only add to your marriage satisfaction if you complete these tasks while staying open to each other.

Relationship Resources:

Join the 30 Day Couples Challenge that is the best fit for keeping your heart open:

➡️ Level 1: "Prioritizing Us" is focused on strengthening your connection, communication, and fun "Love Deposit" ideas. LINKED HERE

➡️ Level 2: "Rebuilding Us" is focused on repairing and rebuilding after a harder season of marriage. LINKED HERE

🌟 For all the other resources, including the guides and webclasses: https://www.meetthefreemans.com/links

Last week was our LIVE Marriage Webclass on effective communication, de-escalating conflicts, and repairing after an argument. If you missed registering for that FREE event, you can still access the replay link here. There was so much that we covered that we did not have time to answer any of the questions pertaining to the Before, During, and After skills that we taught.

So on today's episode we will cover the 3 most common questions we received at the end of the class, so that everyone that was on can get those answers. If you did not watch, you can use the link to still watch, even if you did not, these are very common questions that will be very meaningful for you to hear. These answers will be very practical so that you can use them in your own life immediately. These are the questions you will hear answers to:

✅ What can I do? How do I handle when my partner is defensive/not receptive despite the timing of the conversation.

✅ How do you communicate when expressed needs go unmet? What to do if/when agreements are broken?

✅ What do we do when our partner usually doesn't allow us to take a timeout from a conflict?

Relationship Resources:

➡️ As you listen, make sure you watch the REPLAY of our Live + Free Marriage WebClass. We only host this ONCE a year, and this link will only be available for one more week.

➡️ Find the links to all the guides and 30-day challenges with our resources page here. https://www.meetthefreemans.com/links

When you are not having the same type of conversation it is very easy to misunderstand each other. When there is misunderstanding it is easier to get frustrated and have the conversation escalate into a conflict. It is important to know which type of conversation you are having, a logical or emotional one, so that this doesn't happen.

As much as any one of us thinks we are logically minded people, there is still an underlying emotional need such as respect, understanding, love, partnership ect. This is definitely the case whenever there is some tension or upset. In those moments you have to realize that to be effective in your communication with each other, emotions come before logic. This statement can bring up a few questions so dive into this episode to undercover how to better identify when an emotional conversation is needed versus when you can stick to the logical details of a conversation.

Relationship Resources:

➡️ As you listen, make sure you register for our Live + Free Marriage WebClass coming up February 19th, 2025. We only host this ONCE a year, so don't miss it!

➡️ Find the links to all the guides and 30-day challenges with our resources page here. https://www.meetthefreemans.com/links

Raising one's emotional intelligence (EQ) is a critical factor in the long term satisfaction and maturity within a marriage. Without this, the depth of a couple's connection will be limited and small emotional disruptions will turn into bigger conflicts (and likely never address the root cause). This is a term you have likely heard of before in terms of marriage and other important relationships in your life. But it can often be too abstract and conceptual to be put into practice.

In today's episode you will hear 5 skills that build EQ. You will get a clear definition of each of these skills as well as the practical action to take to strengthen that muscle. These 5 skills do build on themselves and can be seen as sequential. So as you work on each of these, be sure you are completing each step before moving to the next. By listening to this episode you will have a clear understanding of how to raise your EQ and the benefit it will be for your relationship.

Relationship Resources:

➡️ As you listen, make sure you register for our Live + Free Marriage WebClass coming up February 19th, 2025. We only host this ONCE a year, so don't miss it!

➡️ Find the links to all the guides and 30-day challenges with our resources page here. https://www.meetthefreemans.com/links

As fellow parents, we share in that deep responsibility you feel to equip your kids with healthy relationship skills—and conflict is a huge part of that!

How you and your partner handle disagreements doesn't just impact your marriage; it actively shapes how your kids will navigate conflict in their own future relationships.

In this episode, we'll break down four key aspects of conflict that your kids need to witness—and how small shifts can make a lasting impact.

➡️ As you listen, make sure you register for our Live + Free Marriage WebClass coming up in February. We only host this ONCE a year, so don't miss it 🌟

For video content follow on IG: @meet_the freemans

You are likely aware that conflicts are going to happen, they shouldn't be avoided, but accepted that they will happen. But how you handle the conflict determines whether it can be connecting and clarifying or it escalates and causes hurt. What really causes it to escalate is when you each are triggered and you let that trigger cause you to just react.

In this episode today you will hear how you can better recognize emotional triggers, which has to be the first step, and then how you can de-escalate before a bigger conflict arises. A key takeaway is that you need to recognize your own triggered events and reaction patterns, but as a partner, how to recognize these in your partner as well.

You will then hear the 2 responsibilities you each have, followed by practical steps to de-escalate as you practice these things. This is the true work to be done in marriage, your marital satisfaction depends on your ability to recognize triggers and keep yourself from reacting in more hurtful ways.

Relationship Resources:

DO NOT MISS the once per year LIVE Marriage Webclass with The Freemans. The date is set for Feb 19th, 2025. This will be a virtual, 1 hour weblcass to communicate more effectively, de-escalate conflicts, and repair from conflicts fully. The class is FREE, but will be limited to 1000 attendees live. There will be a recoding as well, but you will need to register to have it sent to you. We will see you there! Register here: https://onlinecouplesworkshops.com/

After the date passes, you will be able to find the recording and all the other guides and challenges with this link: https://www.meetthefreemans.com/links

Follow us on Instagram @meet_thefreemans

When you have a marriage conflict there are a few options you have as a partner. You can react or you can suppress it. Neither of these are good options. Your two good options are to repair or have a more simple debrief conversation.

In this episode you will hear the simple steps to take to have a debrief conversation. You will hear the difference between when a repair conversation is needed and when you just need this type of debrief conversation. By implementing these steps you can avoid lengthy conversations and get back on the same page faster with the productive steps to be on the same team to move forward.

Relationship Resources From Epsiode:

DE-ESCALATE CONFLICTS GUIDE: A realistic guide to managing your emotions and keeping simple conversations from escalating into overblown fights. It's the De-escalating Conflicts & Regulating Emotions Guide and it's only $19.

REPAIR CONFLICTS GUIDE: A step-by-step guide to repairing after an argument; to ensure it's resolved for good and get back to being truly connected as a couple. It's the Making Up & Moving Forward Guide and it's only $19.

Most everyone gets into a marriage for the positive feelings of love, compatibility, passion, and creating a future together. It's these great feelings and potential outcomes that can happen that make marriage a desirable thing. What most people miss is what it requires to be married and maintain the feelings of togetherness and high satisfaction through all the unforeseen challenges and obstacles. It is funny how we all think our relationship will be different from all those who went before us… but the fact is you need to be ready to evolve in ways you can't see right now.

In this solo episode you will hear from Aaron as he walks through 3 areas of evolution that you need to accept and be ready for if you want to be successful in marriage. Continuing a thread from the previous episode about the acronym COMMITTED, you will dive further into the area of Evolution and Adaptation and these three areas you need to be willing to adapt in, first as an individual, and then as a couple, to have your marriage stand the test of time!

Relationship Resources:

1) This is the last week to participate in the Best of Us 30-Day Couples Challenge. Over 3000 couples have started the challenge to start this new year, many of which felt a real shift even after the first 5 days. This challenge is for JANUARY ONLY, but you can register now and start on Day #1 immediately while getting the 30 consecutive challenge activities right to your inbox.

2) After this challenge window closes, take a look at the next available challenges of Prioritize Us or Rebuilding Us.

Marriage is about bringing out the best in each other. Are you in a season of marriage where you can say that you are bringing out the best in each other? This doesn't always happen as it does take more intention the longer you are together. Sometimes your conflict patterns of reactions can make it seem as if you are bringing out the worst in each other. Other times you feel constrained and limited in your self expression and individual pursuits because your partner doesn't accept those parts of you.

In this episode you will hear 6 different actions you can take to actually bring out the best in each other for this year ahead. These actions will be steps to take each day that demonstrate your acceptance, understanding, and support of each other and the person you are each becoming in the marriage. Marriage is itself an evolution and taking these 6 steps will allow for the required individual evolution to happen to become the best versions of yourselves.

Relationship Resources:

To go along with this epiosde, you can be securly on the path to brining out the best in each other by sign-up for the SPECIAL EDITION 30-day couples challenge "The Best of Us" which is now open (but for January ONLY!) This challenge is designed to reignite the spark in your marriage with Intimacy Activities, Connection Prompts, and Appreciation Gestures.