She Wasn't Born Yesterday

About the Guest:

Margaret Hodgkinson is a dedicated mum, grandma, and teacher currently balancing her life while caring for her ageing mother. She has recently navigated the intricate and often frustrating system of aged care in New South Wales, Australia. Her journey through dealing with health, legal, and financial challenges of elder care provides her with unique perspectives and wisdom invaluable to those facing similar situations.

Key Takeaways:

• Initiate Early Conversations: Start discussing aged care plans with your parents well before it becomes a critical need for easier transitions.
• Understand Legalities: Learn about NCAT, enduring power of attorney, and other legal instruments crucial for managing elderly care.
• Leverage Support Networks: Utilize available services like social workers, community seminars, and a trusted solicitor to navigate the system smoothly.
• Maintain Mental Health: Caregivers need to ensure they look after their well-being through emotional support and time management.
• Proactive Financial Planning: Organize finances early on, including understanding pensions, assets assessments, and planning for aged care costs.

Notable Quotes:

1. "It's only a natural reaction. Yes, they were managing on a day-to-day basis, but I was becoming more concerned..."
2. "You've either die young or get old. So what's your option? They're your options, basically." 
3. "I enjoy seeing my kids and grandkids going for a walk, especially in the bush." 
4. "It is really hurtful because you're wanting the best for them and yet they're treating every decision you make with intense suspicion."

 

Resources:

NSW Civil and Administrative Tribunal

Anglicare Sydney - Retirement Living, Home Care and Residential Aged Care | Anglicare

 

Click here to contact Janet & Amelia or ask them a question or click here to contact the She Wasn't Born Yesterday team!

She Wasn’t Born Yesterday, hosted by Janet Evans, a former M&C Saatchi advertising creative and Dr Amelia Haines, a sexual and relationship therapist, who have written Australia’s first book on empty nest syndrome called Empty Next.

Visit Empty Nest Chicks for more resources, click here for their book, or join the discussion on Facebook.

Listen to more from our Hope Podcasts collection at hopepodcasts.com.au. And send the team a message via Hope 103.2’s app, Facebook or Instagram.

 

Support the show, a product of Hope Media: https://hope1032.com.au/donate/2211A-pod/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

HEADSUP!!! Episode Release this Thursday: Caring for Aging Parents with Margaret Hodgkinson

In this pre-episode chat of SWBY, hosts Dr. Amelia Haines and Janet Evans delve into the intricate challenges faced by the "sandwich generation"—those balancing the demanding roles of caring for both their growing children and aging parents. The discussion brings light to the unique stresses and emotional toll this dual caregiving responsibility can impose, all while navigating complicated healthcare systems and family dynamics.

Navigating Dual Caregiving Challenges
Adults in their 40s and beyond often find themselves juggling the responsibilities of guiding their young or teenage children and caring for their elderly parents. Hosts Janet Evans and Dr. Amelia Haines introduce the concept of the "sandwich generation," discussing the emotional complexities and societal pressures tied to this situation. They recount personal stories and examine broader societal implications, making this episode a must-listen for anyone in this caregiving sandwich. Listeners will gain insights into how aging parents' vulnerabilities reveal new facets of family relationships and dynamics.

Healthcare and Family Dynamics
The maze of navigating healthcare systems for the elderly can be daunting, even for professionals like Dr. Haines. She shares her experiences and frustrations with the convoluted processes. Janet and Amelia also discuss the differing opinions within families on how best to care for aging parents, which can sometimes lead to conflict. They explore how retirement villages, nursing homes, and the often resistant attitudes of elderly parents add more layers to the already challenging scenarios faced by families today.

 

Click here to contact Janet & Amelia or ask them a question or click here to contact the She Wasn't Born Yesterday team!

She Wasn’t Born Yesterday, hosted by Janet Evans, a former M&C Saatchi advertising creative and Dr Amelia Haines, a sexual and relationship therapist, who have written Australia’s first book on empty nest syndrome called Empty Next.

Visit Empty Nest Chicks for more resources, click here for their book, or join the discussion on Facebook.

Listen to more from our Hope Podcasts collection at hopepodcasts.com.au. And send the team a message via Hope 103.2’s app, Facebook or Instagram.

Support the show, a product of Hope Media: https://hope1032.com.au/donate/2211A-pod/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Janet Evans and Dr. Amelia Haines delve into the world of dating over 40, discussing the pros and cons of popular dating apps like Tinder, Bumble, and CougarD. They explore issues of safety, the time-consuming nature of app-based dating, and red flags to watch out for, such as punctuality and financial requests. The episode also touches on STIs, compatibility factors, and the importance of yielding in relationships. With plenty of anecdotes, Janet and Amelia provide a candid look at navigating the dating scene as an older woman.

Key Takeaways:

• Evolution of Dating Apps: From match.com to niche applications like Sizzl and TinDog, the world of online dating has significantly diversified, offering both opportunities and challenges for mature women.

• Time Consumption: Dating apps, while useful, are often time-consuming and demand a lot of effort, emphasizing the importance of balancing online and offline dating methods.

• Safety in Dating: Always prioritize your safety, meet in public places, and consider a background check if necessary. Be aware of red flags such as suspicious financial requests.

• Yielding in Relationships: Successful relationships often require a degree of yielding from both parties, allowing for flexibility and compromise without sacrificing personal boundaries.

• The Role of Compatibility: Ensuring compatibility, whether regarding energy levels or shared interests, is vital for lasting connections.

Notable Quotes:

1. “Meeting people who know friends of yours, that's a very good way of meeting people.” – Dr. Amelia Haines

2. “Dating apps are very time-consuming and very slow.” – Dr. Amelia Haines

3. “You need to yield a little bit. I'm not saying have no boundaries, but just yield that little bit.” – Dr. Amelia Haines

4. “People need to be aware that people aren't always 100% what they present themselves as being.” – Dr. Amelia Haines

5. “It's a numbers game. It's a case of meeting as many people as possible.” – Dr. Amelia Haines

 

Click here to contact Janet & Amelia or ask them a question or click here to contact the She Wasn't Born Yesterday team!

She Wasn’t Born Yesterday, hosted by Janet Evans, a former M&C Saatchi advertising creative and Dr Amelia Haines, a sexual and relationship therapist, who have written Australia’s first book on empty nest syndrome called Empty Next.

Visit Empty Nest Chicks for more resources, click here for their book, or join the discussion on Facebook.

Listen to more from our Hope Podcasts collection at hopepodcasts.com.au. And send the team a message via Hope 103.2’s app, Facebook or Instagram.

Support the show, a product of Hope Media: https://hope1032.com.au/donate/2211A-pod/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

HEADSUP!!! Episode Release this Thursday: Online Dating When You're 40+ With The Empty Nest Chicks!

In this pre-episode chat of SWBY, hosts Dr. Amelia Haines and Janet Evans tackle the intricacies of online dating for the 40+ fabulous crowd. Whether you’re a veteran swiper or new to the dating app scene, this episode provides an engaging and thought-provoking exploration of modern matchmaking.

In this episode, Janet and Amelia delve into the world of dating apps, offering nuanced discussions about the pros and cons of such platforms. They ponder the efficacy of swiping left or right and share mixed reviews from various dating app users. Janet brings her advertising creativity to the table, while Dr. Amelia provides medical and psychological perspectives. Together, they navigate the complexities of online dating, from humorous anecdotes about niche dating apps to real-life implications for those over 40 seeking love or companionship.

Click here to contact Janet & Amelia or ask them a question or click here to contact the She Wasn't Born Yesterday team!

She Wasn’t Born Yesterday, hosted by Janet Evans, a former M&C Saatchi advertising creative and Dr Amelia Haines, a sexual and relationship therapist, who have written Australia’s first book on empty nest syndrome called Empty Next.

Visit Empty Nest Chicks for more resources, click here for their book, or join the discussion on Facebook.

Listen to more from our Hope Podcasts collection at hopepodcasts.com.au. And send the team a message via Hope 103.2’s app, Facebook or Instagram.

Support the show, a product of Hope Media: https://hope1032.com.au/donate/2211A-pod/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

About the Guests:

Jenny Woodhouse is a Pastoral Care Coordinator with the Church Missionary Society of New South Wales and ACT. She was formerly a chaplain of the Sydney Anglican Churches Professional Standards Unit. Jenny brings a wealth of experience in dealing with sensitive and complex issues, offering invaluable support to individuals experiencing challenging situations in their personal lives.

Justine O'Malley is a social worker and counsellor with over 30 years of experience working with children and young people, specializing in supporting their social and emotional development. Her expertise particularly focuses on children aged three to 13 years. Justine has dedicated her career to helping vulnerable children navigate and heal from domestic violence and related traumas.

Key Takeaways:

• Prevalence and Forms of Domestic Violence: Domestic violence isn't just physical; it includes emotional, psychological abuse, and coercive control.

• Impact on Children: Almost 40% of Australian children experience domestic violence, leading to long-term emotional and psychological consequences.

• Support Mechanisms: Victims often need multiple attempts to leave their abusers due to psychological manipulation and financial control.

• Societal Responsibility: Education on healthy relationships and gender equality is crucial for both prevention and intervention.

• Resources and Community Support: Friends, family, and community support systems play a pivotal role in aiding victims and encouraging them to seek help.

Notable Quotes:

1. "Violence, I think, conjures up for us the sense of physical violence, whereas domestic abuse is more largely emotional, psychological abuse." — Jenny Woodhouse

2. "Almost 40% of children in Australia are exposed to family and domestic violence before they're 18." — Justine O'Malley

3. "The gaslighting is really significant... because it's so subtle and because you do start to second-guess yourself." — Jenni Woodhouse

4. "It's not just one point. I think it's actually several points... on average, women leave about five, six times and keep going back." — Jenni Woodhouse

5. "If you see some of these red flags, they're things that you can start to have a discussion with. They're things that you can open the doors to discussion and say, I'm here. I'm here to listen." — Justine O'Malley

Resources:

• Call 1800Respect or their website

• Our Watch – for primary intervention resources

 

Click here to contact Janet & Amelia or ask them a question or click here to contact the She Wasn't Born Yesterday team!

She Wasn’t Born Yesterday, hosted by Janet Evans, a former M&C Saatchi advertising creative and Dr Amelia Haines, a sexual and relationship therapist, who have written Australia’s first book on empty nest syndrome called Empty Next.

Visit Empty Nest Chicks for more resources, click here for their book, or join the discussion on Facebook.

Listen to more from our Hope Podcasts collection at hopepodcasts.com.au. And send the team a message via Hope 103.2’s app, Facebook or Instagram.

Support the show, a product of Hope Media: https://hope1032.com.au/donate/2211A-pod/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

HEADSUP!!! Episode Release this Thursday: Escaping DV with Jenny Woodhouse and Justine O'Malley. 

If this episode raises some concerns for you, please contact 1800RESPECT or their website

In this pre-episode chat of SWBY, hosts Dr. Amelia Haines and Janet Evans dive deep into the harrowing subject of escaping domestic violence. This episode sheds light on not just the primary victims but also the often-overlooked secondary victims—the children. Amelia and Janet engage in a powerful discussion exploring the intricacies and pervasive effects of domestic violence, emphasizing the critical need to protect and support all affected parties.

Amelia and Janet underline the alarming statistics around domestic violence, particularly highlighting men's violence against women while acknowledging other dynamics in abusive relationships. With insights from Justine, a dedicated psychologist, the discussion broadens to the psychological damage inflicted on children who witness or are victims of domestic violence. This episode aims to bring awareness and prompt societal change towards a safer future for those trapped in abusive environments.

Click here to contact Janet & Amelia or ask them a question or click here to contact the She Wasn't Born Yesterday team!

She Wasn’t Born Yesterday, hosted by Janet Evans, a former M&C Saatchi advertising creative and Dr Amelia Haines, a sexual and relationship therapist, who have written Australia’s first book on empty nest syndrome called Empty Next.

Visit Empty Nest Chicks for more resources, click here for their book, or join the discussion on Facebook.

Listen to more from our Hope Podcasts collection at hopepodcasts.com.au. And send the team a message via Hope 103.2’s app, Facebook or Instagram.

Support the show, a product of Hope Media: https://hope1032.com.au/donate/2211A-pod/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

About the Guest:

Dr. Patricia Weerakoon is a renowned sexologist, author, and speaker known for her expertise in human sexuality, relationships, and sexual health. She has an extensive background in clinical practice and academic teaching, delivering lectures and seminars worldwide. Dr. Weerakoon has authored numerous books and articles on sexual health and is known for integrating scientific knowledge with relational and ethical insights.

Key Takeaways:

• Fluidity in Sexual Orientations: Women's sexual orientations can often be more fluid, leading to shifts in preferences over time.

• Mixed Orientation Marriages: In these heterosexual marriages, where one spouse is same-sex attracted, can still thrive with open communication and mutual respect.

• Social and Emotional Impact: Discovering a spouse's changed sexual orientation or gender identity affects not just the couple but the entire family unit.

• Importance of Community Support: Churches and social groups can offer crucial support in dealing with these complex changes.

• Communication is Key: Open dialogue and possibly counseling can help navigate the emotional landscape of shifting sexual orientations and gender identities.

Notable Quotes:

1. "You get up in the morning and you find a pansexual next to you. It’s almost like you get up in the morning and you find a turkey next to you or something." - Dr. Patricia Weerakoon

2. "Women are more fluid in their sexual orientation, and therefore, it could actually be looking at, I'm bored with my husband, and here’s my best friend." - Dr. Patricia Weerakoon

3. "Men from about their teenage years are actually turned on by the feeling, the fantasy of themselves as a woman." - Dr. Patricia Weerakoon

4. "We worship a good God. There are couples who are mixed orientation marriages doing really well." - Dr. Patricia Weerakoon

5. "Human beings are kind of fabulously amazing that we care more about the human being, especially women." - Dr. Amelia Haines

 

Resources:

• Dr. Patricia Weerakoon's Website: Patricia Weerakoon | Christian Sexologist & Author

 

Click here to contact Janet & Amelia or ask them a question or click here to contact the She Wasn't Born Yesterday team!

She Wasn’t Born Yesterday, hosted by Janet Evans, a former M&C Saatchi advertising creative and Dr Amelia Haines, a sexual and relationship therapist, who have written Australia’s first book on empty nest syndrome called Empty Next.

Visit Empty Nest Chicks for more resources, click here for their book, or join the discussion on Facebook.

Listen to more from our Hope Podcasts collection at hopepodcasts.com.au. And send the team a message via Hope 103.2’s app, Facebook or Instagram.

Support the show, a product of Hope Media: https://hope1032.com.au/donate/2211A-pod/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

HEADSUP!!! Episode Release this Thursday: Who Is This Person in My Bed with Dr. Patricia Weerakoon. 

This pre-episode chat dives into the complex and often emotionally charged topic of changing sexual orientations within a relationship.

Janet shares a story about a friend's surprising marital revelation. After a glitter-filled party, her friend's husband discloses that he is transgender, dressed in her clothing and accessories. This revelation shocks both partners, leading to a rollercoaster of emotions and eventually a divorce. Dr. Amelia Haines provides her professional perspective on such life-altering moments, emphasizing the enormous psychological impact it has on both individuals involved. They discuss whether relationships can survive such a profound shift, shedding light on real-life examples and expert opinions.

Click here to contact Janet & Amelia or ask them a question or click here to contact the She Wasn't Born Yesterday team!

She Wasn’t Born Yesterday, hosted by Janet Evans, a former M&C Saatchi advertising creative and Dr Amelia Haines, a sexual and relationship therapist, who have written Australia’s first book on empty nest syndrome called Empty Next.

Visit Empty Nest Chicks for more resources, click here for their book, or join the discussion on Facebook.

Listen to more from our Hope Podcasts collection at hopepodcasts.com.au. And send the team a message via Hope 103.2’s app, Facebook or Instagram.

Support the show, a product of Hope Media: https://hope1032.com.au/donate/2211A-pod/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

About the Hosts: 

Janet Evans is an ex-M&C Saatchi advertising creative with a successful history in the industry, having won numerous radio and TV awards. Her expertise and creativity have been recognized in media beyond advertising.

Dr. Amelia Haines is an experienced medical doctor with 30 years of experience, specializing in sexual health, mental health, and relationship counseling. She brings her extensive medical knowledge to a wider audience through her public speaking and written work. 

Episode Summary:  

In this final episode in Season 1 of “She Wasn’t Born Yesterday,” Janet Evans and Dr. Amelia Haines explore the universally challenging transition known as the 'Empty Nest Syndrome'. This podcast promises to be a sanctuary for women over 40 who are navigating the complexities of life after their children have flown the coop. With a blend of humor, medical insights, and real-life experiences, the hosts delve into the emotional turbulence that often accompanies this significant life stage. 

Janet and Amelia offer personal anecdotes and professional advice, discussing how sudden changes, such as children leaving home, can impact parents. They touch on the varying degrees of adjustment disorders, the importance of maintaining a strong relationship with one’s partner throughout parenting, and the need for personal fulfillment beyond child-rearing. With their book “Empty Next” as a backdrop, they provide honest reflections on coping with change, managing relationships post-parenting, and redefining oneself in the face of an empty home. 

Key Takeaways: 

• Empty nest syndrome, while not an official medical syndrome, is widely recognized as an adjustment disorder with a varying impact on parents when children leave home. 
• The syndrome can last for a relatively short duration but has the potential to lead to depression if not addressed. 
• Maintaining and nurturing the spousal relationship during child-rearing years is critical for the transition to post-parenting life. 
• Engaging in personal interests and community connection is vital for newly emptied nesters to find fulfillment and establish a new sense of identity. 
• Cultural perspectives on empty nest syndrome provide a diverse understanding of this global phenomenon. 

Notable Quotes: 

• Dr. Amelia Haines on the inevitability of children leaving home: “I think I’ve always just been aware that that’s what life does.” 
• Janet Evans on the unanticipated nature of her son leaving: “I just sailed along, not really… It never crossed my mind.” 
• Janet Evans on maintaining a connection with grown-up children: “I think one thing that I missed the most was the shift from being his somewhat of a confidant.” 
• Dr. Amelia Haines on in-law relationships: “It’s hard to get on with, […] You need to be super generous.” 

Resources: 

• The hosts discuss their collaborative book titled “Empty Next,” available for purchase on Amazon. 

For more episodes and insightful conversations, follow our podcast and join us on our journey to explore life’s adventures and complexities for women 40+ fabulous! 

Support the show, a product of Hope Media: https://hope1032.com.au/donate/2211A-pod/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

About the Guest: 

Collett Smart is a respected psychologist, educator, public speaker, and author with over two decades of experience working in both private and public school settings, as well as in private practice. Known for her expertise in child development, Collette has garnered recognition for her contributions to the field of psychology and education. She has authored the book “They’ll Be Okay: 15 Conversations to Help Your Child Through Troubled Times,” which addresses parenting challenges and provides guidance for raising teenagers. With a passion for discussing mental health, relationships, and the complexities of teenage development, Collette brings a wealth of knowledge and practical advice to parents and educators alike. 

Episode Summary: 

In this insightful episode of “She Wasn’t Born Yesterday for women who are 40 plus fabulous,” hosts Janet Evans and Dr. Amelia Haines invite psychologist Collett Smart to delve into the intricacies of parenting teens. The conversation begins with a reminder of the whimsical days when children thought their parents were the epitome of cool and ventures into the challenges that come with the shifting dynamic as children grow into teenagers. 

The episode offers a candid look into the seismic shifts that occur as children transition into their teenage years, exploring the physical exhaustion of early parenthood versus the emotional toll of guiding adolescents through life’s complex scenarios. Collette Smart shares her personal experiences with her own children and reiterates the importance of conversations around body image, mental health, and the pressures teenagers face in an increasingly digital landscape. 

Key Takeaways: 

• Recognising that teenagers communicate in different ways, and being open to non-traditional formats, such as texts or notes, can be crucial in maintaining open lines of communication. 
• Setting boundaries and normalising body image insecurities are essential conversations parents should have with their teens amidst the bombardment of social media influences. 
• Mental health in adolescents is more openly discussed now than ever before, yet parents still need strategies to identify and address potential signs of depression or anxiety. 
• Encouraging resilience and connection to safe adults outside of the parental unit can provide teens with additional support systems. 
• It’s never too late to start or repair relationships with your children, emphasising that consistent effort and an open heart can lead to positive outcomes. 

Notable Quotes: 

• Teenagers are always communicating with you, even if it’s not with words. Look for communication in their behaviors.
• Technology is the biggest difference in this generation to our generation, having the smartphone in their pockets all the time.
• You can be paying all the money for tutors, schools in the world. You are flushing it down the toilet if your child is not having good enough sleep.

• Children crave boundaries. They don’t need a 40-year-old BFF; they need you to be their parent.
• Our young people often clam up with us because they think we’re either going to freak out or it’s going to be a lecture.

Resources: 

• Collette Smart’s book: “They’ll Be Okay: 15 Conversations to Help Your Child Through Troubled Times” 
• Collette Smart’s podcast Raising Teens with Collett Smart

 

For more episodes and insightful conversations, follow our podcast and join us on our journey to explore life’s adventures and complexities for women 40+ fabulous! 

Support the show, a product of Hope Media: https://hope1032.com.au/donate/2211A-pod/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.