Sober Edge

Is there a difference between how men break up with alcohol and how women break up with alcohol?

In my podcast this week I catch up with Duncan Bhaskaran Brown, author of 'Get Over Indulgence' and the soon to be published book "Real Men Quit".

Duncan has a delightful sense of humor and a powerful message to help us 'stop chasing' and start living. Duncan recounts his own lessons from 20 years of over indulging in smoking, drinking and eating fast food.

We cover topics ranging from the tactics he used to break free; how to think differently about problems and why men struggle with balancing a strong mind and body with their heart and emotions. And, Duncan answers the question, why do men struggle so much in getting help with alcohol use?

Follow Duncan on Instagram

And, for listeners of this podcast, Duncan is offering a free copy of his book 'Get Over Indulgence'. Simply follow him on IG, send him a DM and he will make sure you receive a copy of the book! (Tell him Teri sent you)

Full Show Notes

Ignite Your Sober Spark (free mini-series June 19-June22)

My guest for the podcast this week is Justin Morris, licensed therapist and This Naked Mind Coach.

Justin shares his personal story of growing up where alcohol was modeled as a 'normal' part of adult life and yet he also watched alcohol erode his parent's marriage and create health issues for his grandfather. Justin found himself struggling with drinking in his late teens when he came out as queer at 17.

Heading off to college, Justin used alcohol as a sober 'buffer' to blend in and remain 'unseen'. This drinking pattern continued into a high stress job as a social worker. Justin broke up with alcohol in September of 2020 and now helps others to break through to freedom.

Justin also invites us to explore a new coaching collective, 'Living Proud AF'. This collective is an offering from several This Naked Mind Coaches who identify as LGBTQIA++. Their motto is: Empowering LGBTQIA++ people to take control of alcohol and start . . . Living Proud AF !

Full Show Notes HERE

Calling all women in midlife! This episodes focuses on helping us understand what is happening to our bodies and how to embrace living life to the fullest no matter our age!

Jacqui Garrison is a certified health coach who helps women explore aging with grace. Jacqui lived her life believing she was healthy and creating good health by doing all the right things. It wasn't until she was diagnosed with severe osteoporosis and told 'this is just your lot in life' that she started to explore what healthy really meant.

Jacqui realized that she had been naive and under educated about how to create optimal health. She set out to explore how to heal her body and along the way decided to share this new found knowledge with others. Jacqui now believes that good health means living with the ability to move your body, the ability to recover quickly and to play hard at any age!

Jacqui really shines when it comes to helping women move through menopause feeling lighter and brighter. She believes that women in middle life can embrace this season with a new found excitement about what's next vs. now what?

Jacqui shares the 4 pillars of health and aging gracefully:

• Sleep
• Nutriton
• Mindfulness
• Movement

Full Show Notes HERE

Space: noun

1. a continuous area or expanse which is free, available, or unoccupied:

There are 3 kinds of space (to consider in this AF journey):

• Mental
• Physical
• Emotional

For me, when I was drinking I really struggled with my mental chatter. My brain was filled with thoughts of drinking, thoughts of not drinking and with beating myself up. There was no free space. When I put alcohol aside, I created so much mental space! Suddenly, there was space. Space that allowed me to ask my brain a different question: what's next?

For many clients, it is important to create more physical space. This can be boxing up all the wine paraphernalia in your house (who knew we had this much?) or giving away the martini and margarita glasses.

Emotional space is a biggie.We often have no space in our lives to process our emotions. We fill our days with responsibilities and deadlines and then wonder why we fill so flat and depleted… Creating emotional space allows us to pause and respond vs. react.

I use the word 'create' or 'creating' intentionally because it is an action word. This process involves your participation and your willingness to explore a new way of being.

Full Show Notes HERE

Making a change around alcohol (or sugar or exercise) takes motivation. We get inspired or fed up and we feel highly motivated to make a change. For some of us, our alcohol-free journey started from a place of desperation which equaled motivation. You may have heard the saying "sick and tired of being sick and tired", or "when the pain of remaining the same is greater than the pain of change, we change". But, while motivation gets us started, it isn't enough. Motivation comes and goes.. We can all think of examples, personal or with others, that illustrate this phenomenon: the empty gyms on January 15th; the diet we will start on Monday; the half-finished closet clean out. Motivation is key to getting started but the real change agent is momentum.

Momentum is what keeps us in action. And, the beautiful part about momentum is that energy creates energy. So, being in momentum = more momentum. Let's think about our AF journey: we start out motivated, either from a place of pain or a place of possibility. We take a step forward (read a quit-lit book, hire a coach, join a support program) and we are in momentum. We no longer have to rely on motivation because we are already moving forward. Motivation will come and go but momentum is always available. I never expect my clients to stay continually motivated as they go through this transformation, instead we work together to create routines, habits and thoughts that support momentum. This is key to creating lasting change.

If you have been frustrated by your inability to get started, stay motivated and create change, here's what you need to know about motivation and momentum:

• Motivation is a feeling; momentum is an action.
• Motivation answers the WHY; momentum is the HOW.
• Motivation is fleeting; momentum is always available.
• Motivation helps us get started - use it!
• Momentum helps us continue the thing we started - use it!

Full SHOW NOTES Here

Get your Recipe Book (scroll to the bottom of the show notes to grab your copy) HERE

If you have ever thought "wouldn't it be great if there was one place to find all things sober" look no further. Alysse Bryson is the creator of the online magazine The Sober Curator. She is also a woman in long-term recovery who recently celebrated 17 years of freedom from alcohol. Alysse shares her journey from the anonymous rooms of AA to 'recovering out loud' and becoming a spokesperson for all of us who are walking a similar path.

Alysse discovered that there was not 'one version' of recovery. She lived her alcohol-free life quietly but found that she was often a sought after resource for friends and family. Then, during the pandemic, she made a shift from protecting her own story to 'recovering out loud'. She credits her time and experience in sobriety to allowing her to identify 'when she could be helpful' and why moving front and center was the next right move.

With her background in media and print, Alysse launched The Sober Curator in August of 2020. The Sober Curator is an online magazine that features a variety of contributing writers and a content library that includes: Lifestyle, Entertainment, Happy Every Hour, Travel and The Spiritual Gangster. This pandemic baby recently placed in the top 15 recovery blogs and the top 10 recovery magazines in the world.

Full Show Notes Here

Zero Proof Experiences Portalnd, ME information

My Sober Girlfriends' Book Club

What do you want to know how becoming alcohol-free? It turns out, most of you have these top 5 questions in common:

1. Do I have to stop drinking 'forever'?
2. Is it possible to moderate?
3. How do I help my body heal?
4. Help - how do I socialize without alcohol?
5. Who am I if I don't drink?

On the podcast, I share why I think these questions pop up, how I answer them, and why it's so important to keep asking questions. Head over to the show notes for more about what's behind these 5 questions!

FULL SHOW NOTES HERE

This is a solo episode where I share a new take on an old thought.

For many of us, the end of something feels final. The very definition is "the final part of something". So, when we have this thought and we live with this definition, it can be challenging to decide to 'end' something.

Let's look at our relationship with alcohol. Many people are reluctant to say 'forever' and make a permanent decision about alcohol. The idea feels daunting and 'too' final. Instead, we hear phrases such as 'one day at a time', or 'never say never'. It's become popular to say 'you don't have to say forever, just say for right now'. And, while I understand the reasoning, I believe this can keep us stuck. So many people I coach express that they want to learn to moderate, to drink occasionally. The idea of 'making a clean break' feels impossible.

But, what if we changed our thought around endings? What if we saw it not as an ending but as a new beginning? The definition of begin is 'to start or initiate something'. I have realized on this journey of self-exploration, which started after I stopped drinking, that every ending is really a new beginning, and that what used to feel like an ending now feels like a transition. I have found that shifting my mind just slightly, to embrace the end of something as the beginning of something else has helped with any transition in my life.

This thought process works whether you are the one who chooses the transition or if it is forced upon you - a job loss, a relationship change, a death.

In this episode I share my personal ending and what it has meant to me to be at the new beginning.

I also share 5 steps to move through your own transition from ending to beginning.

Full Show Notes HERE

Today I am hanging out with an actual Iron Man!

Buck Robinson has laced up his shoes and will be participating in Iron Man Lake Placid and he will be sponsored by Athletic Brewing. None of this would have been possible just a few years ago when he found himself using alcohol instead of exercise as a way to blow off steam at the end of the day.

Buck shares his story on the podcast, including how becoming a parent led to his drinking more and putting fitness on the back burner. During his drinking years, Buck found himself 'romanticizing' alcohol and he even considered himself a beer connoisseur.

When Buck turned 49, the universe delivered a harsh message: he found out his birth father had suffered from heart disease and his biological grandfather had died at 49. At the same time, he received a warning from his doctor that his labs indicated he was 'pre' everything; pre-diabetic, pre-obese, prehypertension, pre-cirrhosis.

Since embracing an alcohol-free lifestyle, Buck has returned to fitness, including running, training for an Iron Man and doing some intense fitness challenges, such as running 52 miles for his 52nd birthday! A sober friend, who had been watching his journey, suggested he connect with Athletic Brewing about becoming an ambassador. Not only did they offer him the ambassadorship, but Athletic Brewing is sponsoring him in the Lake Placid Iron Man this summer!

Here are some of the highlights: Romanticizing Alcohol The self-sabotage of the 'detox to retox' cycle Not a fad but a revolution The physical changes are the smallest reward

Full Show Notes Here (including a 20% off link to Athletic Brewing!)

Sponsor: My Sober Girlfriends' Book Club HERE

The Power of Books. I think we have all been transformed by a book - transported to a make-believe world or moved by powerful history.

I believe in the power of books because books allow me to explore a life that might look wildly different than mine and also because they show me what is possible in my own life. And, books can be powerful connectors, showing us in big and small ways how we are humans having a human experience and not so different after all.

On this alcohol-free journey many books have been written about the science of addiction, and so many memoirs have been authored that a new genre, 'quit-lit' , has emerged. That is the power of books!

In this podcast episode, I share some thoughts about what books mean to me and I chat with my friend and partner, Sarah Showard about our new offer: My Sober Girlfriends' Book Club.

We are excited to create a book club that is focused on all of the things women love about book clubs with none of the booze. Fun, Friendship, Reading, Growth and Connection - join us for a new twist on your old book club!

Full Show Notes Here

My Sober Girlfriends' Book Club details