Starter Marriage

After a harrowing week without hot water, John emerges as an expert on tankless water heaters, while Allison shares her battle with pregnancy exhaustion. She also takes aim at the corruption behind John’s new cutthroat competition: “Sweetie of the Week.” Writer and disability rights activist Emily Ladau then joins the chat to discuss how the disabled community has been denied marriage equality and how adopting a “curb cut” philosophy could benefit us all. The conversation leads Allison to reveal one of her main reasons for only wanting one child. 

John has a new substack! : https://wrongmanforthejob.substack.com

If you would like to submit a “Marriage Moment’ or suggest a future episode topic, email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. 

Learn more about the possibilities of modern marriage with a copy of ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠I DO (I THINK): Conversations About Modern Marriage⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. 

Purchase Allison’s new romcom novel ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Save The Date.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 

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Gender roles can weigh especially heavy in a marriage. In this episode, John and Allison have a frank conversation about what it's like to be married to a member of the opposite gender, the pressures and expectations that come with it, and how those forces can drive a disconnection.

If you would like to submit a “Marriage Moment’ or suggest a future episode topic, email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. 

Learn more about the possibilities of modern marriage with a copy of ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠I DO (I THINK): Conversations About Modern Marriage⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. 

Purchase Allison’s new romcom novel ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Save The Date.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 

If you like the show, telling a friend about it would be helpful! You can text, email, Tweet, or send this link to a friend: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://bit.ly/StarterMarriage

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It may be 2025 but the hottest trend on the internet is women pretending like it’s 1950. Trad Wives, short for “Traditional Wives,” boast millions of followers as they pretend to live the pastoral life of a submissive homemaker. But that image couldn’t be further from the truth. Journalist and novelist Jo Piazza joins the podcast to discuss this phenomenon and why she thinks Harry Burns and Sally Albright from When Harry Met Sally should have never gotten together.  

If you would like to submit a “Marriage Moment’ or suggest a future episode topic, email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. 

Learn more about the possibilities of modern marriage with a copy of ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠I DO (I THINK): Conversations About Modern Marriage⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. 

Purchase Allison’s new romcom novel ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Save The Date.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 

If you like the show, telling a friend about it would be helpful! You can text, email, Tweet, or send this link to a friend: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://bit.ly/StarterMarriage

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Most couples assume attraction fades over time, but does it have to? In this episode, Allison shares a fear that’s been on her mind during pregnancy: what if her body changes and John stops desiring her? The two talk about how attraction isn’t automatic. It’s something both partners have to nurture. John also reveals his harrowing appendicitis story. And Allison admits there’s one thing she always finds herself drawn to, no matter the circumstance: corn.

If you would like to submit a “Marriage Moment’ or suggest a future episode topic, email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. 

Learn more about the possibilities of modern marriage with a copy of ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠I DO (I THINK): Conversations About Modern Marriage⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. 

Purchase Allison’s new romcom novel ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Save The Date.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 

If you like the show, telling a friend about it would be helpful! You can text, email, Tweet, or send this link to a friend: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://bit.ly/StarterMarriage

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John and Allison are thrilled to welcome author and historian Stephanie Coontz to the podcast for a deep dive into the complicated history of marriage. How did what started as a strategic partnership between families evolve into the over-idealized 1950s model of gender roles? Allison also unveils her nighttime alter-ego, “the Ali-Baba." John chooses a marriage moment that, curiously, doesn’t involve Allison at all; and Stephanie tells us what happened when she forced herself to read 50 Shades of Grey.

If you would like to submit a “Marriage Moment’ or suggest a future episode topic, email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. 

Learn more about the possibilities of modern marriage with a copy of ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠I DO (I THINK): Conversations About Modern Marriage⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. 

Purchase Allison’s new romcom novel ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Save The Date.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 

If you like the show, telling a friend about it would be helpful! You can text, email, Tweet, or send this link to a friend: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://bit.ly/StarterMarriage

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Conflict in relationships is inevitable, especially when you're making a podcast about your marriage. Allison and John dive into how they navigate conflicts in their relationship, including the surprising disagreement that arose while prepping for this very episode. John shares the exact moment he realized he wasn't afraid to have a child with Allison, and during "Stay or Leave," Allison presents John with the most triggering scenario imaginable.

If you would like to submit a “Marriage Moment’ or suggest a future episode topic, email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. 

Learn more about the possibilities of modern marriage with a copy of ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠I DO (I THINK): Conversations About Modern Marriage⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. 

Purchase Allison’s new romcom novel ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Save The Date.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 

If you like the show, telling a friend about it would be helpful! You can text, email, Tweet, or send this link to a friend: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://bit.ly/StarterMarriage

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This week’s episode is about sex, jealousy, and whether embellishing a story counts as a lie. Writer and content creator Hayley Folk joins Allison and John to talk about her experience with ethical non-monogamy and what it taught her about herself. Allison imagines what it would be like to have a guilt-free make out, and John wonders what it would be like to go on a sexy date… to the orchestra?

If you would like to submit a “Marriage Moment’ or suggest a future episode topic, email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. 

Learn more about the possibilities of modern marriage with a copy of ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠I DO (I THINK): Conversations About Modern Marriage⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. 

Purchase Allison’s new romcom novel ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Save The Date.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 

If you like the show, telling a friend about it would be helpful! You can text, email, Tweet, or send this link to a friend: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://bit.ly/StarterMarriage

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John and Allison dive into one of the most contentious topics for any couple: money. Joined by Megan Ford from the Love and Money Center, they explore how couples can navigate tough financial conversations without getting stuck in conflict. It's a challenging discussion for John, who wrestles with deeply rooted expectations about being a provider, and unexpectedly emotional for Allison, who comes to realize how her own approach to their finances has impacted John in ways she never anticipated.

If you would like to submit a “Marriage Moment’ or suggest a future episode topic, email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. 

Learn more about the possibilities of modern marriage with a copy of ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠I DO (I THINK): Conversations About Modern Marriage⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. 

Purchase Allison’s new romcom novel ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Save The Date.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 

If you like the show, telling a friend about it would be helpful! You can text, email, Tweet, or send this link to a friend: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://bit.ly/StarterMarriage

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Being single isn't failure. For some, it's freedom. Social psychologist and author of Single At Heart, Bella DePaulo joins the show to dismantle the myth that marriage is life's ultimate goal, making the case that for many, the single life can be the most authentic path. And yes, couples might have something to learn from that. Then, John faces a tough choice: if Allison runs off to Quebec to chase her dream, does he follow her... or file for divorce?

If you would like to submit a “Marriage Moment’ or suggest a future episode topic, email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠. 

Learn more about the possibilities of modern marriage with a copy of ⁠⁠⁠⁠I DO (I THINK): Conversations About Modern Marriage⁠⁠⁠⁠. 

Purchase Allison’s new romcom novel ⁠⁠⁠⁠Save The Date.⁠⁠⁠⁠ 

If you like the show, telling a friend about it would be helpful! You can text, email, Tweet, or send this link to a friend: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://bit.ly/StarterMarriage

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John is concerned that having a baby will totally disrupt their marriage. Thank goodness the co-authors of Baby Bomb: A Relationship Survival Guide For New Parents were available to help Allison and John navigate this new chapter. Therapists Kara Hoppe, MFT and Stan Tatkin, PsyD, MFT, discuss how Allison and John can continue to take good care of each other despite the major changes babies bring. Also, were the Ratliffs happily married before Timothy lost all their money on The White Lotus? A debate ensues. 

If you would like to submit a “Marriage Moment’ or suggest a future episode topic, email us at ⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠. 

Learn more about the possibilities of modern marriage with a copy of ⁠⁠⁠I DO (I THINK): Conversations About Modern Marriage⁠⁠⁠. 

Purchase Allison’s new romcom novel ⁠⁠⁠Save The Date.⁠⁠⁠ 

If you like the show, telling a friend about it would be helpful! You can text, email, Tweet, or send this link to a friend: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://bit.ly/StarterMarriage

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