Taboo to Truth: Life & Sex After 50

Midlife women aren’t avoiding sex—they’re avoiding pain, boredom, and frustration. In this episode, I unpack the real reasons intimacy fades during midlife and what couples can do to reconnect. From hormone shifts and low libido to communication struggles and painful sex, Karen provides practical solutions and compassionate insights to help couples reignite intimacy.

If you’ve ever wondered why your partner seems to avoid the bedroom, this episode gives you the tools to start the right conversation and explore solutions—from medical options like hormone therapy to introducing new ways of creating pleasure.

Timestamps:

00:00 – Why midlife women avoid sex

00:35 – Hormones, menopause & low libido

01:25 – Emotional struggles & stress

02:05 – Boring or painful sex: the silent killers

03:15 – The power of communication

04:10 – Possible solutions: hormones, therapy & vibrators

05:05 – Final advice: reconnecting with love

Watch the full episode on YouTube for a more visual experience of today’s discussion. This episode is best enjoyed on video—don’t miss out!

Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases.

This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider.

Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here:

Email: [email protected]

Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast

Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases.

This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider.

Follow Karen Bigman:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@taboototruth

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61551130276567

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/karenbigman

Website: http://taboototruth.com

Subscribe to Taboo To Truth on YouTube:

https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast?sub_confirmation=1

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Listen to The Taboo To Truth Podcast 🎧 New episodes drop every Tuesday & Saturday!

Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/2OHcG2UAb2l7FJp48jc0f9

Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/taboo-to-truth-life-sex-after-50/id1769391023

Take control of your pleasure with my Pleasure Playbook, filled with tips to help you connect with your body and enhance intimacy. Download it now at www.taboototruth.com/pleasureplaybook.

Take control of your pleasure with my Pleasure Playbook, filled with tips to help you connect with your body and enhance intimacy. Download it now at www.taboototruth.com/pleasureplaybook.

Menopause is no longer a silent struggle. From “millennipause” to cutting-edge treatments like GLP-1s, today’s conversation with Jackie Giannelli, a board-certified family nurse practitioner specializing in women's health with extensive expertise in hormonal health, menopause, women's sexual health, and urogynecology, dives into the evolving landscape of perimenopause and menopause care.

We explore the shifting attitudes around hormone replacement therapy, the rise of millennials entering perimenopause, and why lifestyle, supplements, and community matter just as much as medical interventions. Jackie also breaks down how GLP-1 medications may become a new arm of menopause treatment — while highlighting their potential impact on sexual health.

Whether you’re curious about natural options, considering hormone therapy, or just beginning your perimenopause journey, this episode offers clarity, science-backed insights, and compassion for women navigating this complex phase of life.

Timestamps:

0:00 – Welcome & Introduction to Jackie Giannelli

1:15 – What is “Millennipause”?

4:12 – How millennials are approaching perimenopause differently

6:45 – Hormone hesitancy is fading: why women want bioidenticals now

9:50 – Non-hormonal treatments: supplements that actually work

13:30 – Lifestyle shifts that make a difference in perimenopause

16:45 – GLP-1 medications and their surprising potential in menopause care

21:05 – The hidden side effects of GLP-1s on sexual health

23:18 – The power of community and women supporting women

25:10 – Jackie’s definition of sex & closing thoughts

Want a deeper look? Watch the full episode on YouTube for a more visual experience of today’s discussion. This episode is best enjoyed on video—don’t miss out!

Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases.

This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider.

Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here:

Email: [email protected]

Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast

Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases.

This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider.

Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here:

Email: [email protected]

Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast

About the Guest:

Jackie Giannelli is a board-certified family nurse practitioner specializing in women's health with extensive expertise in hormonal health, menopause, women's sexual health, and urogynecology. Jackie is a Menopause Society-certified practitioner, and an active member of the International Society for the Study of Women's Sexual Health.   She trained and honed her expertise in this niche field at the largest freestanding women’s sexual health clinic in the country, Maze Women’s Health. 

Previously, Jackie has served as the founding nurse practitioner and Director of Clinical Practice at Elektra Health, a digital women’s health company on a mission to smash the menopause taboo.  She also spent time as an Operator-in-Residence at 25m Health, a health-tech venture platform incubating new companies and investing in breakout startups. She advises and consults regularly in the digital health and startup space, and often mentors clinicians who are looking to pivot from the bedside into a non-traditional clinical role.  She also continues to practice bedside medicine and is taking new patients as the Director of Women’s Sexual Health at Anna Barbieri, MD in NYC.  

Jackie is passionate about women’s health literacy and using technology to expand access to care, as well innovation in clinical strategy and private practice enablement.  Jackie aims to democratize access to evidence-based midlife wellness education using her social media platform, through her newsletter In the Saddle, her digital clinical frameworks and as the co-host of the WellKept podcast.

Jackie earned her nursing degrees at New York University and San Francisco State University and a B.A. in Health Studies from Georgetown University. Her work has been featured in Well+Good, PopSugar, and Everyday Health. She is a sought-after national speaker and educator in the field of women’s health.  She lives in CT with her husband and two tween children but will never tire of trips to NYC for theater, culture, shopping and endless inspiration.

Connect with Jackie Giannelli:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jackie_giannellifnp/ 

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jacqueline-giannelli-rn-msn-fnp-bc-ncmp/ 

Podcast: https://open.spotify.com/show/6eQRSsPNEE9R39Ah5182Yk?si=dfc033ca2bd6488d

Take control of your pleasure with my Pleasure Playbook, filled with tips to help you connect with your body and enhance intimacy. Download it now at www.taboototruth.com/pleasureplaybook.

Take control of your pleasure with my Pleasure Playbook, filled with tips to help you connect with your body and enhance intimacy. Download it now at www.taboototruth.com/pleasureplaybook.

In this episode, I share what I’ve learned after coaching women through menopause and living it myself. Through my own journey and countless conversations, I’ve identified what I call the five emotional stages of menopause: What the F**, Confusion, I Need Help, Acceptance,* and Empowerment. I walk you through each stage, the struggles and frustrations, and the hope that comes when you realize you’re not alone. Menopause isn’t a disease—it’s a natural phase of life that can actually lead you to strength, freedom, and empowerment.

Timestamps:

00:00 – Introduction: My Menopause Journey

00:35 – Stage 1: WTF?! The Strange Symptoms I Didn’t Recognize

01:50 – Stage 2: Confusion – When I Thought Something Was Seriously Wrong

02:50 – Stage 3: I Need Help – Admitting I Couldn’t Do It Alone

03:50 – Stage 4: Acceptance – Finally Understanding Menopause

04:40 – Stage 5: Empowerment – How I Found Strength and Freedom

05:50 – Final Thoughts: Why Menopause Wasn’t the End for Me

06:20 – Outro

Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases.

This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider.

Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here:

Email: [email protected]

Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast

Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases.

This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider.

Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here:

Email: [email protected]

Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast

Want a deeper look? Watch the full episode on YouTube for a more visual experience of today’s discussion. This episode is best enjoyed on video—don’t miss out!

Take control of your pleasure with my Pleasure Playbook, filled with tips to help you connect with your body and enhance intimacy. Download it now at www.taboototruth.com/pleasureplaybook.

Take control of your pleasure with my Pleasure Playbook, filled with tips to help you connect with your body and enhance intimacy. Download it now at www.taboototruth.com/pleasureplaybook.

In this episode of Taboo to Truth, I sit down with Keeley Shoup — co-owner of CuddleList, director of CuddleXPro, and a certified Wheel of Consent facilitator — to explore the groundbreaking world of professional cuddle therapy. Keeley explains how platonic touch, rooted in boundaries and consent, can promote healing, reduce anxiety, ease grief, and improve relationships. Together, we break down the science behind oxytocin, discuss how intimacy isn’t always sexual, and share powerful stories of transformation through touch. Whether you’ve never heard of cuddle therapy or are curious about its impact, this conversation will shift how you think about connection, healing, and intimacy.

Timestamps:

0:00 – Introduction

Introducing Keeley Shoup and sets the stage for today’s taboo topic.

1:15 – What Is Cuddle Therapy?

Keeley explains the origins, purpose, and misconceptions about cuddle therapy.

3:40 – The Science of Touch

How oxytocin, nervous system regulation, and platonic connection improve mental health.

6:05 – Virtual Cuddle Therapy

How sessions adapted during COVID and what “online cuddling” really looks like.

7:40 – Intimacy Beyond Sex

Redefining intimacy: emotional, romantic, platonic 

10:00 – Cuddle Therapy in Practice

Keeley shares stories of healing, from grief support to boundary setting.

12:50 – Couples, Polyamory & Touch

How cuddle therapy applies to couples, throuples, and polyamorous groups.

14:20 – A Powerful Client Breakthrough

The story of emotional release leading to unexpected physical healing.

16:00 – Closing & Extended Cut Info

Final thoughts

Want a deeper look? Watch the full episode on YouTube for a more visual experience of today’s discussion. This episode is best enjoyed on video—don’t miss out!

Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases.

This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider.

Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here:

Email: [email protected]

Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast

Keeley has practiced as a full time Cuddle Therapist since 2015, supporting clients in both individual and group settings. She is a certified Cuddle Party facilitator and has taken every training program that exists for professional cuddlers. She continues her education in IFS, EFT, somatic experiencing, embodiment practices, the wheel of consent, and racial equity. In 2017, she became the Director of CuddleXpo, the first ever professional cuddlers convention. The 3 day educational event hosted over 100 professionals and participants from all across the world. Keeley has been a fierce advocate; reaching international audiences as she works to destigmatize mental health, promote education on boundaries and consent, and increase access to the groundbreaking therapeutic modality of cuddle therapy.

Keeley is fostering an interdisciplinary community within the field of mental health professionals. She is the founder of Talk & Touch Pros; a networking resource group for collaboration between talk and somatic therapies. As co-owner and CEO of Cuddlist, Keeley works to increase the company’s visibility, further the high standard of quality within Cuddlists’ community of practitioners, increase practitioner’s accessibility to supportive resources, and champion the Cuddlist mission across the globe.

Connect with Keeley:

Website: https://www.keeleyshoup.com

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/yourcuddletherapist

Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases.

This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider.

Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here:

Email: [email protected]

Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast

Take control of your pleasure with my Pleasure Playbook, filled with tips to help you connect with your body and enhance intimacy. Download it now at www.taboototruth.com/pleasureplaybook.

Take control of your pleasure with my Pleasure Playbook, filled with tips to help you connect with your body and enhance intimacy. Download it now at www.taboototruth.com/pleasureplaybook.

What if everything you thought about porn was wrong?

In this episode let’s dive into the world of ethical porn—porn made with consent, transparency, fair pay, and respect for all performers. Unlike mainstream porn, ethical porn focuses on real people, real pleasure, and real connection.

👉 What you’ll learn in this episode:

• What ethical porn is and how it’s made
• Why mainstream porn sets dangerous, unrealistic expectations
• The importance of consent, safety, and fair pay in adult content
• How to find ethical platforms you can feel good supporting
• Why ethical porn can help reframe intimacy in healthy, realistic ways

💡 If you’ve ever searched for “real porn” or “ethical porn” and weren’t sure where to start, this episode is for you.

Links

https://makelovenotporn.tv/videos

https://watch.erikalust.com

https://www.bellesa.co

Timestamps:

00:00 – Introduction: What if everything you knew about porn was wrong?

00:25 – What is ethical porn? Consent, communication & fair pay

01:25 – How mainstream porn exploits performers and misleads viewers

02:15 – Why ethical porn shows real connection, real pleasure

03:10 – How to find ethical platforms & support creators

03:45 – Final thoughts: Pleasure, consent, and respect matter

Want a deeper look? Watch the full episode on YouTube for a more visual experience of today’s discussion. This episode is best enjoyed on video—don’t miss out!

Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases.

This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider.

Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here:

Email: [email protected]

Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast

Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases.

This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider.

Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here:

Email: [email protected]

Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast

Take control of your pleasure with my Pleasure Playbook, filled with tips to help you connect with your body and enhance intimacy. Download it now at www.taboototruth.com/pleasureplaybook.

Take control of your pleasure with my Pleasure Playbook, filled with tips to help you connect with your body and enhance intimacy. Download it now at www.taboototruth.com/pleasureplaybook.

In this episode, I sit down with Niki Davis-Fainbloom (aka Miss Bloom), a non-monogamy pleasure and fetish coach, to explore the world of fetishes, kinks, and how our culture shapes desire. Nikki shares her research from hundreds of interviews with people who hold “uncommon” desires, and breaks down the difference between kinks and fetishes, the origins of certain turn-ons, and how to talk about these vulnerable topics with a partner. From the neuroscience of foot fetishes to the playful roleplay of vor (the desire to be “swallowed”), this conversation is packed with insights, humor, and permission to embrace who you truly are in the bedroom.

Whether you’re curious about your own desires, wanting to spark intimacy with a long-term partner, or simply fascinated by human sexuality, this episode will leave you with tools to open conversations and normalize what society often stigmatizes.

Timestamps:

00:00 – Welcome & Introduction to Miss Bloom

01:05 – What is a fetish? Defining desires beyond the norm

03:10 – Fetish vs. kink: How they differ and overlap

05:05 – How culture shapes our desires (the quicksand example)

07:00 – Shame, secrecy, and impact on relationships

09:05 – Coaching example: Roleplay for vor fetish

11:10 – The neuroscience of foot fetishes

13:00 – Tips for sharing fetishes with a partner

14:20 – Consent, communication & closing thoughts

✨ If you’ve ever felt “different” in your desires, this episode is here to remind you: You are not alone.

👀Want a visual experience? Watch all episodes on YouTube—search Taboo To Truth.

Use code TRUTH15 for 15% off at https://www.arya.fyi

About the Guest:

Niki Davis-Fainbloom is a Canadian-born, New York-based sex educator, writer, researcher, and coach. Since receiving her Master’s degree studying the psychology of sexual dysfunction from NYU, she has facilitated hundreds of sexual education workshops at locations including Planned Parenthood, New York University, and The United Nations. After studying Sex Therapy at Guelph University, she has also built up her coaching practice, specializing in working with kinks & fetishes, ethical non-monogamy, and most importantly, pleasure. Her work uses up-to-date research, humor, and practical advice to help people develop the skills to have healthier and more satisfying romantic and sexual relationships.

Connect with Niki Davis-Fainbloom (aka Miss Bloom):

Website: https://www.nikidavisf.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/missbloomsexeducator

Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases.

This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider.

Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here:

Email: [email protected]

Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast

Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases.

This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider.

Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here:

Email: [email protected]

Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast

Take control of your pleasure with my Pleasure Playbook, filled with tips to help you connect with your body and enhance intimacy. Download it now at www.taboototruth.com/pleasureplaybook.

Take control of your pleasure with my Pleasure Playbook, filled with tips to help you connect with your body and enhance intimacy. Download it now at www.taboototruth.com/pleasureplaybook.

Cheating isn’t the biggest relationship killer—money is. I reveal the hidden financial red flags that can quietly destroy trust and security, and how to protect yourself before it’s too late.

I share my own experience of ignoring the warning signs and what it cost me, plus the subtle clues you might be missing: lavish spending on a modest income, secretive money habits, repeated requests for “loans,” inconsistent stories about debt, and more.

You’ll learn:

• How to spot financial instability early
• Why joint expenses should never mean giving up control
• How to protect yourself with solid planning and prenups
• Why honest money talks are as vital as conversations about intimacy

Whether you’re dating, remarried, or in a long-term relationship—especially in midlife—this conversation will help you protect both your heart and your wallet.

Because healthy money habits aren’t just smart… They're sexy.

Timestamps:

00:00 – Why financial red flags matter more than you think

00:25 – Money & sex: the two hardest conversations

00:55 – My personal story of ignoring the signs

01:35 – Lavish spending vs. real income

02:05 – Secretive behavior & repeated requests for money

02:40 – Why you should talk about credit scores

03:05 – Inconsistent debt stories & hidden bankruptcies

03:35 – The danger of “my money, your money” control

04:00 – Protect yourself with planning & prenups

04:40 – The importance of professional financial advice

05:05 – “Open books, open hearts”: building transparency

05:40 – Keep money talks going for a healthier relationship

06:10 – Final takeaway: healthy money habits are sexy

Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases.

This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider.

Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here:

Email: [email protected]

Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast

Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases.

This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider.

Want a deeper look? Watch the full episode on YouTube for a more visual experience of today’s discussion. This episode is best enjoyed on video—don’t miss out!

Follow Karen Bigman:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@taboototruth

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61551130276567

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/karenbigman

Website: http://taboototruth.com

Take control of your pleasure with my Pleasure Playbook, filled with tips to help you connect with your body and enhance intimacy. Download it now at www.taboototruth.com/pleasureplaybook.

Take control of your pleasure with my Pleasure Playbook, filled with tips to help you connect with your body and enhance intimacy. Download it now at www.taboototruth.com/pleasureplaybook.

In this episode, I had the absolute pleasure of speaking with Ariela Salinas Fiora. She’s an actor, writer, director, sex educator, and fierce advocate for fat, queer, and Latinx representation. But what really struck me was her deeply personal journey into ethical non-monogamy—especially within a decades-long marriage, while raising kids, and embracing her full identity as a woman over 50.

We talked about everything: how she and her husband first explored the “seven-year itch,” how their kids found out about their open marriage, what it means to be oriented toward multiple partners, and how she’s dealt with jealousy (hint: it’s not what you’d expect).

Ariela shares what it’s like to be affectionate, honest, and deeply committed in more than one relationship—and why she had to “come out” about it dramatically… onstage.

This episode is about expanding our definitions of love, sex, parenting, and what it means to live authentically in our relationships—at any size, at any age, and on our own terms.

Timestamps:

00:00 – Welcome + Meet Ariela Salinas Fiora

01:12 – How we met: SAR and sexual attitude reassessment

02:00 – Marrying young & the start of non-monogamy

03:28 – The “Seven-Year Itch” conversation in the car

05:05 – When kissing isn’t just kissing

06:32 – Realizing she’s always been non-monogamous

07:55 – Fat, queer, and rewriting representation

09:20 – Telling the kids about their open marriage

10:47 – Bringing partners home: How it works in real life

12:10 – Polycules, partners, and blended connections

13:40 – Boundaries, intimacy, and making it work

15:00 – Jealousy, priorities, and staying grounded

16:25 – Final thoughts on love, honesty, and self-trust

17:55 – Outro + Where to listen for more

Want a deeper look? Watch the full episode on YouTube for a more visual experience of today’s discussion. This episode is best enjoyed on video—don’t miss out!

Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases.

This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider.

Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here:

Email: [email protected]

Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast

About the Guest:

Ariella Salinas Fiore is an actress, creator, director, death doula, and intimacy professional from Los Angeles. She was lucky enough to be born into a family of fierce and talented female artists who supported her by putting her on stage at every opportunity.  A first generation Nicaraguan/Panamanian American , she is passionate about increasing inclusivity for both Latinx and plus sized folks in entertainment.  Her first solo show, The Fat Girl's Guide To Life, Sex, and Everything In Between, premiered in 2024 at the Hollywood Fringe Festival and has since been welcomed in multiple venues around Los Angeles.

Connect with Ariella:

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/AriellasFanPage 

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ariellasalinasfiore

Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases.

This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider.

Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here:

Email: [email protected]

Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast

Take control of your pleasure with my Pleasure Playbook, filled with tips to help you connect with your body and enhance intimacy. Download it now at www.taboototruth.com/pleasureplaybook.

Take control of your pleasure with my Pleasure Playbook, filled with tips to help you connect with your body and enhance intimacy. Download it now at www.taboototruth.com/pleasureplaybook.

Porn: educational tool or relationship wrecker? This week, I’m  breaking down the truth behind adult content—how it impacts solo and partnered intimacy, when it becomes problematic, and how it can actually support a healthier relationship and better sex. We will also explore the world of ethical porn, real-life arousal, and how fantasy on-screen isn't always what it seems in real life.

If you’ve ever wondered whether porn is hurting or helping your connection, this episode is a must-listen.

Timestamps:

00:00 – Intro: Is Porn Really Bad for You?

01:42 – When Porn Becomes a Problem

03:20 – Solo vs. Partnered Play: The Role of Porn

04:55 – Fantasy vs. Reality in Adult Content

06:40 – What is Ethical Porn? (+ Sites to Know)

09:35 – Real People, Real Pleasure: Homemade Porn Explained

11:20 – Porn and ED: A Surprising Use Case

13:10 – Relationship Conflict Over Porn

15:05 – When to Seek a Sex Therapist

17:00 – Using Porn to Reignite Intimacy

18:25 – Porn as Entertainment, Not Education

Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases.

This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider.

Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here:

Email: [email protected]

Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast

Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases.

This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider.

Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here:

Email: [email protected]

Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast

Take control of your pleasure with my Pleasure Playbook, filled with tips to help you connect with your body and enhance intimacy. Download it now at www.taboototruth.com/pleasureplaybook.

Take control of your pleasure with my Pleasure Playbook, filled with tips to help you connect with your body and enhance intimacy. Download it now at www.taboototruth.com/pleasureplaybook.

In this unfiltered conversation, I sit down with renowned sex and relationship coach Caitlin V. to explore the truths about male performance anxiety, orgasms, slowing down intimacy, and why men might be misunderstanding their own desires — and women’s. We discuss how societal pressures create performance myths, the importance of pacing and communication in the bedroom, why curiosity beats confidence, and the misconceptions around anal play, identity, and masculinity. Plus, Caitlin shares her wildest orgasm story and the fantasy she hasn’t tried… yet.

👉 This episode is a masterclass in rewriting the rules of connection, pleasure, and redefining masculinity — with humor, honesty, and heart.

Timestamps:

00:00 – Introduction

02:20 – Meet Caitlin V.: Sex Coach & Performance Expert

04:10 – Why Men Burn Out in Bed (And How to Fix It)

07:45 – The Art of Titration & Variation in Intimacy

11:30 – Slowing Down & Setting Playful Boundaries

16:00 – How to Regulate Your Nervous System Together

19:45 – The Biggest Mistakes Men Make with Women

25:30 – Delayed Ejaculation & Overstimulation Explained

33:50 – Porn, Edging & Why It Can Backfire

38:40 – Anal Play, Masculinity & The Butt Taboo

47:00 – Caitlin’s Definition of Sex

49:20 – The Best Orgasm Story (Yes, It’s That Good)

54:00 – The Fantasy She Still Wants to Try

Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases.

This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider.

Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here:

Email: [email protected]

Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast

Caitlin V is a renowned sex and relationship coach specializing in helping men overcome erectile dysfunction, performance anxiety, and premature ejaculation. A former sexual health researcher and policy analyst, she skyrocketed to internet fame after a viral video on female pleasure. Today, she works with clients worldwide to resolve mismatched libidos, enhance sexual confidence, and create more satisfying intimate experiences. Blending personal experience with evidence-based science, Caitlin is on a mission to foster a sex-positive world where pleasure is prioritized. With millions of views on YouTube and nearly a million subscribers, she has become a leading voice in the field. Her expertise is now reaching an even wider audience with her upcoming TV show, Good Sex, premiering on Discovery+ and Max.

​​Come As You Want online course:

https://caitlinvneal.com/come-when-you-want-2/

Connect with Caitlin V:

Website: https://caitlinvneal.com

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/caitlinvictoriousx

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@CaitlinV

Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases.

This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider.

Ready to feel Hotter, Wiser, and Wilder?

Join my brand-new Hotter, Wiser, Wilder Masterclass — real talk, real tools, and real strategies to help you feel empowered in midlife intimacy.

Special offer: Get 30% off with code BIRTHDAY30 until July 31 at taboototruth.com/registration

💖 Don’t wait — your pleasure and confidence are worth it.

Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here:

Email: [email protected]

Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast

Take control of your pleasure with my Pleasure Playbook, filled with tips to help you connect with your body and enhance intimacy. Download it now at www.taboototruth.com/pleasureplaybook.

Take control of your pleasure with my Pleasure Playbook, filled with tips to help you connect with your body and enhance intimacy. Download it now at www.taboototruth.com/pleasureplaybook.