Growing up in a Catholic and Filipino family, Jo Portia Mayari didn’t talk about sex. Today Jo joins Dr. Emily in this Taboo Tuesday discussion to share how she went from feeling clueless and closeted to being named one of Arianna Huffington's top 20 health and wellness role models on a mission to help women build their sexual wealth. From struggling with her own sexual trauma at a young age to wanting to be a more body-positive role model for her kids, Jo doesn’t hold back in this episode. Tune in now to hear this deep dive into sexuality, self-pleasure, and how to talk about sex with your kids.

Staying emotionally fit takes work and repetition. That's why the Emotionally Fit podcast with psychologist Dr. Emily Anhalt delivers short, actionable Emotional Push-Ups every Tuesday and Thursday to help you build a better practice of mental health, and surprising, funny, and shocking conversations on Taboo Tuesdays - because the things we’re most hesitant to talk about are also the most normal. Join us to kickstart your emotional fitness. Let's flex those feels and do some reps together!

EPISODE RESOURCES:

Follow Jo on Twitter and Instagram

Find out more about Jo’s work at joportia.com

Read the LA Time’s story featuring Jo: Flirting, romance, love — and ghosting. L.A. daters share their stories

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The Emotionally Fit podcast is produced by Coa, your gym for mental health. Katie Sunku Wood is the show’s producer from StudioPod Media with additional editing and sound design by nodalab, and featuring music by Milano. Special thanks to the entire Coa crew!

JUMP STRAIGHT INTO:

(01:22) - The path that led Jo to seeking radical self-acceptance - “My oldest daughter and I were in her room getting ready, and she said, ‘Oh my god, Mom, you are so beautiful.’ And I said, ‘No, I'm not. I'm ugly and fat.’ And that look on her face was one I'll never forget, because it was the moment where I knew, as a woman, I could not ask my daughters to be the strong women that I wanted them to become if I wasn't one myself.” 

(8:46) - Becoming more comfortable with self-pleasure - “The only sex education I got from my parents was, ‘Don't get pregnant,’ and I'm like, ‘Okay, great. How do I get pregnant in the first place? Like, what is that act supposed to look like?’”

(14:57) - Permission to embrace our sexuality - “The way I'm having that conversation right now around self-pleasure is inviting moms and women to really understand, ‘You have the ability to step into your role as a sexual creature. And that was not something that needed to be taken away the moment that you became a mom.”

(22:07) - Where to start on the self-pleasure journey - “Touch is just so therapeutic and can be so soothing and so healing for people. And so oftentimes I say, ‘Just start from the neck down. It doesn't even need to mean anything. Just see what feels good, and that's it. And then if you're ready to explore lower, then get there. But no pressure.”

(25:14) - Talking to your kids about sex - “I think the most important part is just to leave the door open and have it open for them to walk through so that when they are ready, they know that you can be a trusted resource as a parent.”