What difference does it make when families actually talk about depression instead of hiding it?

In this episode, Jesse reflects on growing up in a family where mental illness was openly discussed at home, long before society embraced those conversations. She shares what it was like to watch her mother struggle with depression, how honesty helped reduce shame, and how those early conversations shaped her own lifelong journey with depression and anxiety.

Joined by guest co-host John, who also carries a deep family history of depression and addiction, the discussion explores the healing power of openness, the damage of silence, and how breaking cycles of secrecy can change lives — including the next generation’s.

This is a powerful reminder that talking about depression is not just brave — it’s transformative.

Primary Topics Covered:

• Why “talking about depression” is essential for reducing stigma
• Jesse’s family history of depression and anxiety across generations
• How her parents’ honesty helped her as a child understand mental illness
• The experience of watching her mother live with chronic pain and depression
• How secrecy, silence, and gaslighting fueled shame and confusion in other families
• John’s contrasting story of growing up in a family that denied problems
• The impact of being told “it’s not your fault” as a child
• How honesty creates resilience and helps future generations
• Practical ways families can break cycles of silence about mental health

Timestamps:

00:00 – Introduction: Why talking about depression matters  
01:00 – Meet Jesse and guest co-host John  
01:27 – Jesse’s lifelong journey with chronic depression and anxiety  
02:05 – Family openness about depression in the 1960s  
03:14 – How honesty shaped Jesse’s understanding as a child  
04:42 – Her parents’ candid conversations about mental illness  
07:15 – Watching her mother’s struggle with depression and chronic pain  
09:10 – The power of being told “it’s not your fault” as a child  
11:38 – Jesse internalizes stress and develops physical symptoms  
12:38 – The complexity of hearing a parent say “I wish I could die”  
15:00 – Jesse’s lifelong daily depression and morning struggles  
15:58 – Her “tripod of support”: medication, diet, and exercise  
16:46 – Daily practices from 12-step recovery and writing letters  
18:18 – Metaphor of the snowball: unpacking depression one piece at a time  
19:32 – Finding functional, self-respectful ways to cope with depression  
20:46 – John’s contrasting family experience: silence, gaslighting, and addiction  
24:10 – How secrecy undermines children’s trust in themselves  
26:41 – Breaking the cycle: creating openness for the next generation  
27:16 – Closing reflections: the healing power of honest conversations  

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