Stop Talking About Narcissists - Why Celebrating YOUR Wins Is The Path To Healing

 

After 10 years of podcasting about narcissistic abuse, I've realized something critical: we've been giving narcissists exactly what they want - attention. It's time for a movement where we stop obsessing over abusers and start celebrating ourselves!   In this powerful episode, I explain why focusing on "red flags" and manipulation tactics can actually keep us stuck in hypervigilance and fear. Instead, I'm inviting you to share your wins - big or small - as we shift the spotlight onto YOUR healing journey.   Whether you've just taken a peaceful bubble bath despite the text bombing, established a boundary, or won a court case, your story matters and can inspire others. Join me in creating a community where survivors lift each other up instead of staying trapped in negativity.   📱 Share your win (anonymously if you prefer): https://theaudaciouslife.com 🎙️ Leave a voice message through SpeakPipe on our website 📧 Or email your story for me to share from the website https://theaudaciouslife.com   Your experience is valid, and you are not alone. Together, we can change the conversation from fear to empowerment. I'm looking forward to hearing some examples you're proud of. 🏆 What choice did you make that... ➡️ protected your boundary ➡️ set a boundary ➡️ helped you move yourself forward in life vs. allowing the abuser to make you feel small and paralyzed. 🛀🏻 allowed you to feel good 💃🏽 ❣️👩‍👧‍👧 supported the stability of your children I'm looking forward to reading or listening to your shares and most importantly, sharing them with our community so we can be inspired and celebrate with you! 🥳❤️❤️❤️  Until the next one. Lots of Love!! Steph

How I broke Free From Fear and Overwhelm with Prayer 🙏 Breaking free from overwhelming fear through the power of prayer transformed my life. Hear my journey of finding peace and spiritual strength. In this heartfelt video and audio, I share my transformative journey over the past few months, recounting a powerful spiritual awakening that reconnected me with God ✝️.  I discuss how this 'come to Jesus' moment amid personal struggles, including my daughters' health, financial instability, and career changes, gave me the strength to push through tough times. I also reflect on childhood experiences, the importance of a supportive community, and overcoming mental barriers to achieve personal and professional goals. Whether you are facing similar challenges or just seeking encouragement, join me as I share insights on growth, spirituality, and finding purpose 🌱. ⏰ [Timestamps] 00:00 Introduction and Gratitude 00:14 Spiritual Awakening 04:06 Challenges and Overwhelm 05:08 Support and Strength 11:16 Career Journey and Skills 13:36 Overcoming Mental Barriers 15:44 Encouragement and Accountability 22:39 Conclusion and Call to Action 📺 Check out the video I mentioned about Skool: https://youtu.be/8ixXwllGaSg?si=abhPnZuuQ3VN9i73 👩🏽‍💻 Interested in checking out Skool? 👉🏼 Use my referral link: https://bit.ly/Steph-Skool and I'll recieve a portion of your membership if you decide it's for you. ➡️ Try Capcut for EASY video edits on mobile or laptop https://www.capcut.com/capcut_pc_web/fission_receive?code=1reEq481432383&lng=en ➡️ Try Descript for Youtube and Podcast editing via text--easy breezy! https://www.descript.com/?lmref=t41IuQ

  ------------------------------- Check out The Audacious Life Podcast website and blog 🎧 https://theaudaciouslife.com Check out The Audacious Mamas Show Podcast website and blog 🎧 https://audaciousmamas.com ------------------------------- Let’s connect on social media! Facebook ➡︎ http://bit.ly/AL-fans Instagram ➡︎ http://bit.ly/AL-instagram Twitter ➡︎ http://bit.ly/AL-twitter

Massachusetts Passes Coercive Control Bill! What this Means for Survivors

In this episode, I discuss the recent passing of the Coercive Control Bill in Massachusetts, the celebration I attended with many incredible survivors and advocates. And what the passing of the bill means for survivors of domestic abuse. 

Key Points:

• Massachusetts unanimously passed the Coercive Control Bill, becoming the 7th state to classify coercive control as a form of domestic violence.
• The bill (H4744) expands protections against abuse and exploitation, including laws against revenge porn.
• Coercive control is defined as a pattern of behavior intended to threaten, intimidate, harass, isolate, control, or compel compliance of a family or household member.
• The law doesn't criminalize coercive control but allows it to be considered a criminal violation of a protective order.

Highlights:

• Meeting with advocates and survivors at the celebration event
• Discussion on the need for further legislation and support for survivors
• Importance of addressing post-separation abuse and ongoing support for survivors

Resources Mentioned:

• Perfect Prey podcast
• Dr. Lisa Fontes' website
• Article on Massachusetts Coercive Control Law
• Coercive Control Consulting - Legislation Information

Books Mentioned:

• "Invisible Chains" by Dr. Lisa Fontes
• "Framed" by Dr. Christine Cociola (upcoming release)

Call to Action:

• Educate yourself about coercive control
• Contact your local domestic violence agency if you suspect coercive control
• Reach out to state legislators to support coercive control legislation
• Share ideas for supporting survivors, especially in post-separation scenarios

Get Involved:

• Check out TRAC (Together Rising Above Coercion) in Massachusetts
• Look for similar initiatives in your state

Join the conversation! Share your thoughts, experiences, and ideas for supporting survivors in the comments below.

Don't forget to like, share, and subscribe to the podcast for more content on domestic abuse awareness and support.

I'm excited to share this interview because this is a service that I wish I had years ago.

Legal help without breaking the bank? Yes, it's possible! 

Ever wished you had a lawyer on speed dial, but thought it was way out of your budget? Think again! In this eye-opening combo episode of 'The Audacious Life and The Audacious Mama Show,' I sit down with Kamerane Gatlin to chat about a game-changing legal service that's shaking things up.

Imagine having 24/7 access to top-notch law firms for less than your monthly coffee budget - just $29.95! Sounds too good to be true. But, Kamerane's here to spill the tea on how this service is transforming lives, especially for single parents and budding entrepreneurs.

From sticky divorces to unexpected traffic tickets and even navigating the maze of business contracts, this affordable legal plan has you covered. Kamerane shares her journey and how this service became her secret weapon in both personal and professional battles.

We dive into how this legal lifeline can also be your springboard to building generational wealth. You may be curious about turning this into your next business venture. Kamerane dishes out the details on the support, mentorship, and flexible opportunities available.

So, whether you're a parent juggling it all, an entrepreneur with big dreams, or just someone who wants to sleep better at night knowing legal help is a phone call away, this episode is for you. Tune in and discover how you can lawyer up without emptying your wallet!

00:00 Breaking Down the Legal Cost Barrier 02:16 Meet Kemerane: From Skeptic to Believer 05:31 Legal Support for Every Life Scenario 15:55 Entrepreneurs, This One's for You! 23:55 Navigating the Legal App: It's Easier Than You Think 28:09 The Fine Print: Understanding Extra Costs 31:56 From Client to Business Owner: Your New Career? 39:25 Building Your Legacy: Wealth That Lasts 48:37 Final Pep Talk: You've Got This! Need to get this going NOW? Go for it! You can grab the membership for $29.95 here

If you're intrigued by what you've heard today about this game-changing legal service, I've got two ways for you to take action right now:

1. First, I want to hear from you directly. Shoot me an email at stephanir at gmail.com with the subject line 'Legal'. I'd love to chat more about how this could work for you and answer any questions you might have.
2. Second, if you're ready to dive deeper, I've got a special link just for my podcast listeners. But here's the deal - I want to make sure you get the personalized attention you deserve. So instead of just throwing the link out there, reach out to me first. When you email me, I'll send you the link along with some insider tips on how to make the most of this opportunity. It's stephanir at gmail.com. Remember, taking control of your legal needs doesn't have to be scary or expensive. Whether you're a parent, an entrepreneur, or just someone who wants to sleep better at night knowing you've got legal backup, this could be a game-changer for you. Thanks for listening!  Lots of Love, Steph

Healing is in the air! Ready to break free from narcissistic abuse? Discover these 5 essential books to help you heal, release the fear, and rebuild your life. Learn how to break free from toxic patterns, regain your self-esteem, and find inner peace.  

 

Steph discusses the need to focus on healing from narcissistic abuse through recommended resources, emphasizing the importance of moving beyond seeking validation through shared traumatic experiences.

 

Book Recommendations:

 

It's Not You: Indentifying and Healing from Narcissistic People by Dr. Ramani Durvasula, PhD - https://amzn.to/4d7RJn9

Focuses on healing from narcissistic abuse rather than discussing the abuser, providing insights into recovery.

 

Why Does He Do That: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men by Lundy Bancroft - https://amzn.to/3SzJrfg

Explores the mindset of abusive men, offering understanding and validation for those recovering from such relationships.

 

Invisible Chains: Overcoming Coercive Control in Your Intimate Relationship by: Lisa Aronson Fontes, PhD - https://amzn.to/3WRjMla

Offers comprehensive guidance for those still in abusive relationships, covering practical aspects like finances and children.

 

Boundary Boss, Terri Cole: the Essential Guide to Talk True, Be Seen, and (Finally) Live Free - https://amzn.to/4cgCKWt

Provides concrete tips and scripts for setting and maintaining boundaries, especially with toxic individuals.

 

Writing to Heal: A Guided Journal for Recovering from Trauma and Emotional Upheaval by James Pennebaker, PhD - https://amzn.to/3WNaTst

Encourages journaling as a therapeutic tool to process and release trauma, with proven psychological and physiological benefits.

What's on the Horizon

Shifting Focus to Healing and Thriving: Steph emphasizes the need to focus on healing and thriving rather than dwelling on the trauma and identity tied to narcissistic abuse. Seeking ways to find our voice and create meaning through interests that light us up and help give us something to build and look forward to each day, whether a blog, a product, a hobby to share publicly to gain confidence being seen and standing in your power.

 

Personal Experience and Self-Care: She shares her personal journey and the importance of self-care to get through the worst of times and deeper emotional work. Steph intends to develop resources like an eBook and mini-course to help others in similar situations. Watch for announcements about these and a curated newsletter focused on healing and thriving.

 

Engagement and Community Support: She encourages listeners to engage with her content, share their own recommendations, and leave feedback to foster a supportive community for healing from narcissistic abuse.

 

Thank you for listening! Sending lots of Love, light, and prayers to you!!

 

Love you!

Steph

xoxo *This may contain affiliate links, which means I may receive a small commission at no cost to you if you purchase through a link here. I would never recommend a product I don't use or love myself!

 

When we seek validation about narcissistic abuse, we think it's helping us heal. But be warned: The Truth About Narcissistic Abuse Validation is not what we think. We're drawn to memes and videos that validate our experience, comfort us, and maybe even help us feel seen...and sane. But is this the best thing for us to heal and grow beyond the abusive programming? In this episode, I'm sharing some thoughts about how we use content to validate our feelings and what can happen as as result. Here's the video with Lundy Bancroft that I mentioned at the beginning of this episode. Narists vs Abusers: https://youtu.be/0iYfG8x80Yw?si=dkiHPw8BcE7Ae-3f - check the comments and add to the conversation.

QUESTION Who are the people, and what are the channels, books, and podcasts you're following to focus on healing and breaking free from narcissistic programming? I'd love to know so I can utilize them and feature them for others--share in the comments. Thank you!! RESOURCES - Feeling hopeless? Dial the 988 Crisis line for compassionate support. - CNN article on the research: https://www.cnn.com/2023/12/12/health... - The National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) or text LOVEIS to 1-866-331-9474 - The National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-HOPE (4673) or online.rainn.org FOLLOW ME ON SOCIAL   / stephaniroberts      / audaciouslife      / audaciousmamas      / audaciousmamas   THE AUDACIOUS LIFE PODCAST https://www.theaudaciouslife.com/ THE AUDACIOUS MAMAS SHOW https://www.audaciousmamas.com/ WANT TO BE A GUEST ON PODCASTS? Check out my free lesson to learn about the power of podcast guest appearances to build an audience, amplify your authority, and build your brand while growing your email list with warm leads. Thank you for listening! Lots of Love! xoxo!!

Bethenny's Mom Passed - what happened to the divorce videos?

Bethenny Frankel was on a role sharing about her messy 10-year divorce and my last podcast was all about this. But what happened to Bethenny's divorce videos?"  When she decided to share about her divorce, I was ecstatic and shared why I think she'll be a solid, outspoken catalyst for awareness around emotional abuse, coercive control, and more. Then I saw that her mom died just a few days after I posted the podcast. Heartbreaking and awful timing given the roll she was on and how great she reports she was feeling. Stating that she felt, "Good" and "free."

I figured she would pause her episodes to grieve the loss of her mother.

However, a listener shared that the videos have been pulled down. ") This is  about why she pulled them down, her plan IS to share more information moving forward and an alternate place to get information regarding the details of her divorce (BRAVO Docket, link below) if you can't wait or are now so curious about her specific situation. 

 

Please subscribe to her channel and remember to click the bell to be notified when she goes live or shares. It seems like she's on a roll, so we can expect more.

 

And SHARE with other women!

 

BETHENNY ON THE LOSS OF HER MOTHER: https://youtu.be/yaHvmtGr5hE?si=RTKWtSW4EPOregD4

 

THE BRAVO DOCKET ON BETHENNY'S DIVORCE

PART 1: https://podcasts.apple.com/lv/podcast/bethennys-divorce-it-just-goes-on-and-on-my-friend-pt-i/id1549568903?i=1000579166591

PART 2: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/bethennys-divorce-it-just-goes-on-and-on-my-friend-pt-ii/id1549568903?i=1000580622246

 

You may *eventually* be able to see her previous videos below.

 

MY TEN YEAR DIVORCE ON A 2 YEAR MARRIAGE

https://youtu.be/zvGwNyQ5mgA?si=4Agfq-jhMTI-lTeE

 

PART ONE  CHARMING IS A RED FLAG

https://youtu.be/2FxZ52LB9MM?si=d9aEIR6ZUBgkOMT1

 

RESOURCES

- CNN article on the research: https://www.cnn.com/2023/12/12/health/early-signs-of-intimate-partner-violence-wellness/index.html

- The National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) or text LOVEIS to 1-866-331-9474

- The National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-HOPE (4673) or online.rainn.org

 

FOLLOW ME ON SOCIAL

https://www.linkedin.com/in/stephaniroberts/

https://www.instagram.com/audaciouslife

https://www.pinterest.com/Audaciousmamas/

https://www.instagram.com/audaciousmamas

 

THE AUDACIOUS LIFE PODCAST

https://www.theaudaciouslife.com/

 

THE AUDACIOUS MAMAS SHOW

https://www.audaciousmamas.com/

 

WANT TO BE A GUEST ON PODCASTS?

Check out my free lesson to learn about the power of podcast guest appearances to build an audience, amplify your authority, and build your brand while growing your email list with warm leads.

 

Bethenny Frankel's Messy 10-Year Divorce - She's Sharing So We Can Learn

As a longtime fan of Bethenny Frankel, I've been waiting for her to share more about her relationship with her former husband and father of their daughter, Bryn.   As outspoken as she is, she clearly had a gag order in place for many years. And she now considers herself an "expert on Divorce" as she  researched and dug deep to help her case.  I caught a YouTube Live with Bethenny sharing that she's decided to share the details of her divorce. And she aims to help other women! Imagine what Bethenny Frankel can do to spread awareness around narcissism and post-separation abuse, including family court corruption.  She's a black belt in verbal jujitsu and can sling memorable one-liners effortlessly. Her impact WILL BE FELT. I immediately recorded this after watching, and she went live again today before I could get this out.  You can catch her previous videos below. Please do go and subscribe, and remember to click the bell so you'll be notified when she goes live or shares. It seems like she's on a roll, so we can expect more. And SHARE with other women!!

 

MY TEN YEAR DIVORCE ON A 2 YEAR MARRIAGE https://youtu.be/zvGwNyQ5mgA?si=4Agfq-jhMTI-lTeE

 

PART ONE  CHARMING IS A RED FLAG https://youtu.be/2FxZ52LB9MM?si=d9aEIR6ZUBgkOMT1   Thanks for listening! I can't wait to hear your thoughts on this. I will have the YouTube video up on my channel ASAP, along with questions in the community tab. Lots of Love! Steph       Image attribution for promotional graphic "bethenny-frankel-book-a-place-of-yes-330kk" by ekelly89 is licensed under CC BY 2.0.

Fueling Healthy Thoughts: Overcoming Darkness and Transformative Resilience

In this episode I have some raw and vulnerable moments about this year and reflect on what I believe I need to work on with my own stinkin' thinkin'. Being more intentional with what we feed our minds is essential in turning things around, creating hope in our lives, and being a light in the darkness.  It was recorded on MLK Day and I was inspired by his memory and his ability to be the man outside the box pushing through oppressive norms and spurring on all people of color to dare to dream bigger, and believe that more is possible. Here's a run down of this episode

• Reflecting on the challenges of the past year and the struggle to maintain balance in life.
• Drawing inspiration from Martin Luther King Jr. and the power of intention.

Connecting with the Audience:

• Acknowledging the shared difficulties many face, emphasizing the feeling of being overwhelmed.
• Encouraging listeners not to feel alone in their struggles.

The Four Nutriments:

• Exploring Thich Nhat Hanh's concept of the four nutrients (Edible food, Sense impressions, Volition, and Consciousness).
• Emphasizing the importance of identifying sources of suffering and finding peace and joy.

Navigating Personal Struggles:

• Sharing personal struggles with podcasting, career decisions, and the challenges of parenting.
• Expressing empathy for those facing overwhelming situations and the difficulty of finding options.

MLK Day Reflection:

• Reflecting on personal connection to Martin Luther King Jr. and the power of intention in creating positive change.
• Mentioning the influence of spoken words, particularly MLK's "I Have a Dream" speech.

Coping Strategies and Tools:

• Introducing coping strategies, including mindful eating and being aware of sense impressions.
• Discussing the impact of volition on happiness and the importance of cultivating healthy desires.
• Addressing the role of consciousness in transforming painful events and finding enlightenment.

Focusing on Healing and Positivity:

• Highlighting the challenge of podcasting about abuse without inadvertently perpetuating negativity.
• Exploring the power of focus and intention in creating positive change.
• Expressing a desire to shift the podcast's focus towards healing, love, peace, and thriving.

Inviting Positive Stories:

• Sharing the intention to invite guests who have overcome darkness and transformed their lives.
• Expressing the need for positive role models and stories of turning life around.
• Acknowledging personal challenges and the importance of collective healing.

Closing Thoughts:

• Offering tools for managing anxiety and promoting well-being, including heart math techniques and grounding practices.
• Sending love, hope, and thoughts for a brighter future to the listeners.
• Encouraging subscriptions, reviews, and engagement to build a community focused on healing. Mentioned in this episode: Thich Nhat Hahn's "How to Focus" beautiful book. Inner Balance Heart Math App for heart brain coherence and learning to ground and become less anxious. And help the collective energy of your family, home, town, the World. Earthing, grounding mat for grounding while indoors. Just plug it into a grounded outlet. I use mine near my desk for my feet while working and under my sheets so I can ground while sleeping. Amazing!! DISCLAIMER: This post contains affiliate links, which means I may receive a small commission at no cost to you if you purchase through a link here. I would never recommend a product I don't use or love myself!     Thanks for tuning in! Sending lots of Love and wishes for a healthy 2024!  

New Study Uncovers the 16 Early Warnings Signs of Emotionally Abusive Partners In this episode, I dive into brand new research that pinpoints behaviors you should look out for early on in a romantic relationship that could indicate your partner has the potential for emotional abuse, physical violence, and controlling tactics down the road.

The study comes from the University of Western Ontario in Canada, with the goal of uncovering what factors accurately predict if intimate partner violence is likely.

I share the 16 predictors the researchers identified - ranging from pressuring you into sex to creating uncomfortable public situations. A few stand out as being particularly concerning if they happen early in dating.

Some of the key signs to pay attention to:

• Your partner blames their ex for everything
• You feel you can't say no because your partner reacts negatively
• Your partner refuses to admit fault or take responsibility
• You have trouble focusing at work because your relationship consumes your thoughts

The more of these that you notice, the higher likelihood of future abuse in the relationship. While a few issues here and there can potentially be worked on, a pattern of multiple signs is a red flag.

I also discuss talking to your teenagers about healthy and unhealthy behaviors in both friendships and dating relationships. Getting this information early helps them identify poor treatment before it becomes normalized in their relationships.

Resources:

• The National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) or text LOVEIS to 1-866-331-9474
• The National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-HOPE (4673) or online.rainn.org
• CNN article on the research: https://www.cnn.com/2023/12/12/health/early-signs-of-intimate-partner-violence-wellness/index.html

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