The Aware Parenting Podcast

Long gone are the days where parents who wanted to leave the park were told to just walk away and say "bye!" to their child.

However, it can be so common for us as parents to feel really powerless when we want to leave the park and our child doesn't want to. This can often correspond with times when we're hungry or tired, and our own feelings can easily bubble up and out into responses we later regret.

Putting ourselves in our child's shoes at these times can help us be less likely to respond in harsh ways.

Free play, explorative play, these are such innate needs for children, and they're ways that they make sense of the world, explore new abilities, making connections, and release stress. For our hunter-gatherer ancestors, children would have been playing freely in these ways a lot.

Valuing both our needs and theirs helps us be more likely to feel compassionately connected when we go into the situation of eliciting their cooperation to leave the park.

Attachment play, a core part of Aware Parenting, is a beautiful way to create connection, help your child feel deeply valued and cared about, while also eliciting cooperation.

In this podcast episode, I read out the child's story of leaving the park from the my new best-selling book, 'I'm Here and I'm Listening'. After the "Go away!" story that I shared in the last episode, this is one of the ones I love next.

In the book, I talk a lot about eliciting cooperation.

I am so willing for 'I'm Here and I'm Listening' to continue to be a best seller, and to reach the hands, hearts and minds of many many thousands of parents.

If you'd like to support me with that, are you willing to share about the book, such as on social media?

If you have been thinking of buying it, are you willing to buy it now or really soon, to support it to continue being a best seller?

You can buy the paperback on Amazon by searching for 'I'm Here and I'm Listening' on the Amazon store in your country!

Or send me a DM for the direct link!

Big love xoxox

www.marionrose.net

There is an episode called 'Go away" from early on in The Aware Parenting Podcast, AND I felt called to record another one. That's partly because one of my favourite parts in my new best-selling book 'I'm Here and I'm Listening' is where we see this from a child's perspective.

In fact, when parents ask about helpful responses to their crying child saying "Go away!" I often ask them to reflect back on a time in their own childhood when they had a lot of big feelings bubbling and they shouted "Go away!" Did they really want their parent to go away? Or would they have loved them to have stayed lovingly present with their big feelings?

I invite you to reflect on that, too!

When children are moving out of the fight, flight or freeze response, they need to know that they are physically and emotionally safe, so that they no longer need to try to protect themselves and can let go into the resolution of that response and the release of those feelings.

Children need the safety of an adult's presence to really know that they are safe.

If we leave them alone when they're raging, they may stop, but when we look closer, it's likely because they have dissociated from those feelings.

Of course this is a really nuanced process, where we play with the balance of attention, which is providing physical and emotional safety in the present so that they can revisit stressful or traumatic experiences from the past.

This requires our attunement and listening to exactly the amount of closeness which will help them feel safe so they can move into resolution, without overriding their need to feel powerful, which is also an essential part of the healing process.

In the podcast, I read out the child's story from the book.

I am so willing for 'I'm Here and I'm Listening' to continue to be a best seller, and to reach the hands, hearts and minds of many many thousands of parents.

If you'd like to support me with that, are you willing to share about the book, such as on social media?

If you have been thinking of buying it, are you willing to buy it now or really soon, to support it to continue being a best seller?

You can buy the paperback on Amazon by searching for 'I'm Here and I'm Listening' on the Amazon store in your country!

Or send me a DM for the direct link!

Big love xoxox

www.marionrose.net

My new book is out!

It's called 'I'm Here and I'm Listening' and is for parents of 1-8 year olds.

In this episode, I read the first couple of chapters of the book.

The audiobook won't be available for a few months, so I thought I would give you an audio taster!

The paperback of 'I'm Here and I'm Listening' became an immediate best seller – reaching number 1 in the Child Development and the Emotions and Feelings categories (both Best Sellers and Hot New Releases) and number 66 in all books in Australia!

I am so willing for 'I'm Here and I'm Listening' to continue to be a best seller, and to reach the hands, hearts and minds of many many thousands of parents.

If you'd like to support me with that, are you willing to share about the book, such as on social media?

If you have been thinking of buying it, are you willing to buy it now or really soon, to support it to continue being a best seller?

You can buy the paperback on Amazon by searching for 'I'm Here and I'm Listening' on the Amazon store in your country!

Or the direct links are here:

AU: https://www.amazon.com.au/dp/0645998524

US: https://www.amazon.com/dp/0645998524

UK: https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/0645998524

CA: https://www.amazon.ca/dp/0645998524

DE: https://www.amazon.de/dp/0645998524

FR: https://www.amazon.fr/dp/0645998524

ES: https://www.amazon.es/dp/0645998524

IT: https://www.amazon.it/dp/0645998524

NL: https://www.amazon.nl/dp/0645998524

PL: https://www.amazon.pl/dp/0645998524

SE: https://www.amazon.se/dp/0645998524

JP: https://www.amazon.co.jp/dp/0645998524

Lots of love,

Marion

xoxox

Welcome back after the festive season!

This episode is informed by Aware Parenting, but includes a lot of The Marion Method in terms of our reparenting and reculturing journey.

I talk about what may be getting in the way of our deep connection with our innate body wisdom in relation to food:

Our thoughts and beliefs and understanding about food and eating;

Needs we may be meeting with food;

Ways we might be suppressing or dissociating with food.

I share about why judging ourselves and coercing ourselves to 'give up' certain foods often backfires, and what we can do instead, for example when we notice ourselves eating or drinking to suppress feelings.

I offer some practical suggestions, and how replacing self-judgment with compassion and coercion with willingness can make a profound difference in our relationship with food.

My new book, 'I'm Here and I'm Listening' is coming out very soon and includes a big chapter on food and eating in parenting and reparenting!

I still have a couple of mentoring sessions left. Message me for details!

I invite you to sign up for earlybird information about my offerings and my new book here: http://eepurl.com/8ifhn

You can learn out more about my work at www.marionrose.net

You can also find me here:

https://www.instagram.com/_marion_rose_/

https://www.instagram.com/awareparenting/

www.facebook.com/MarionRosePhD

Hello again! This is a pause in the food, feelings and trust series for a festive season special, all about the opposite of overwhelm.

I share about:

The importance of connection with yourself and your values;

How to prevent overwhelm in the first place (saying no is a big factor here);

How you can recognise overwhelm in yourself and your baby/child/teen;

How to release overwhelm.

I'm sending you so much love this festive season and I'm so willing for you to have plenty of connection, ease, community and rest.

I've opened up the doors for 6 and 12 months mentoring in 2024. You can find out more on my social media.

Doors for the Aware Parenting Virtual Village are also opening soon. Keep an eye out on my socials or sign up for information about the early bird and my new book – 'I'm Here and I'm Listening' here: http://eepurl.com/8ifhn

You can also find me here:

https://www.instagram.com/_marion_rose_/

https://www.instagram.com/awareparenting/

www.facebook.com/MarionRosePhD

In this episode, I talk about how to help children who have learnt to eat to suppress their feelings. This follows on from the last episode about helping babies who have learnt to suppress their feelings, and the one before that, about how babies and children learn to feed and eat to suppress their feelings in the first place.

If you haven't already listened to episode 160, I recommend listening to that one first.

And as always, I want to remind you that it's so understandable if your child/ren have learnt to suppress their feelings with food, for all the reasons I shared in episode 160. I invite you to drop any guilt or self-judgment sticks and be deeply compassionate with yourself.

I talked about:

Why our own inner work is vital, so we can be more present with our child/ren;

How presence and connection are the antidotes to suppression and dissociation;

How to help children know they're unconditionally loved when they're eating to suppress feelings;

Why it's important not to use attachment play to get children to eat what we think is healthy;

What types of attachment play can be helpful if food is used to suppress feelings;

Why it's important not to use loving limits with food, apart from in two scenarios;

Which other aspects of Aware Parenting are important to help children express their feelings more and suppress them with food less.

I'm opening up the doors for 6 and 12 months mentoring in 2024 very soon.

Doors for the Aware Parenting Virtual Village are also opening soon.

Keep an eye out on my socials or sign up for information about the early bird and my new books here: http://eepurl.com/8ifhn

You can also find me here:

https://www.instagram.com/_marion_rose_/

https://www.instagram.com/awareparenting/

www.facebook.com/MarionRosePhD

In this episode, I share about what you can do if your baby has learnt to suppress their feelings with feeding.

If you haven't already, I invite you to listen to the previous episode, where I talked about how babies and children learn to suppress their feelings with food.

I said I was going to talk about babies and children in this episode, but I'm separating them into two episodes - so the next episode will be about helping children who have learnt to suppress their feelings with food.

I talk about breastfeeding because that's what I'm familiar with, but most of this is also transferrable to a baby having a bottle to suppress feelings. And you're so welcome here if you bottle feed.

As with that last episode, I invite you to drop any guilt sticks (a Marion Method term)

if you have often fed your baby when they had healing-feelings to express to you.

I talk about:

Why it's so understandable that we would feed our baby when they have healing-feelings to express;

A recap on how we can tell if a baby has learnt to suppress their feelings with feeding;

What can happen if a baby continues to suppress their feelings with feeding and food;

Why having information is so important;

Why having our own feelings heard it so vital too!;

How we can observe what's going on for our baby;

How to notice patterns and make sense of their cues;

How we can offer loving limits; and

The power of attachment play.

I highly recommend The Aware Baby by Aletha Solter, and reading and re-reading chapter 3 on feeding, where she clearly explains how to differentiate between hunger and healing-feelings, and The Emotional Life of Babies, where I talk a lot about feeding, control patterns and observation.

I'm opening up the doors for 6 and 12 months mentoring in 2024 very soon.

Doors for the Aware Parenting Virtual Village are also opening soon.

Keep an eye out on my socials or sign up for information about the early bird and my new books here: http://eepurl.com/8ifhn

You can also find me here:

https://www.instagram.com/_marion_rose_/

https://www.instagram.com/awareparenting/

www.facebook.com/MarionRosePhD

In this episode, I talk about how babies and children learn to suppress their feelings with food and how we can prevent that or lessen those effects.

I share about:

The importance of self-compassion;

Reassurance that this is one of the most common ways that babies and children suppress feelings;

Whatever age your baby or child is, it's possible to help them relearn how to distinguish between hunger and upset feelings;

Inviting you to connect in with yourself to see if this resonates;

How eating to suppress feelings is often passed down in families;

Understanding the two types of feelings - needs-feelings and healing-feelings;

Why being able to differentiate true relaxation from dissociation is vital here;

The spectrum of stress and trauma for babies;

How common it is to feed a baby when we think they're hungry when they actually have healing-feelings;

How they learn to interpret that the sensation of upset is hunger;

Seeing things from the perspective of the baby;

How and why control patterns develop early on;

How babies learn to interpret healing-feelings as hunger;

How we can tell if a baby is suppressing feelings through feeding;

How to differentiate between hunger and healing-feelings;

How we might distract children with food when they are toddlers or children;

How can we tell that a child may be eating to suppress feelings;

How we can prevent or lessen the likelihood a baby learns to suppress their feelings with food.

In the next episode, I'll talk about what we can do to help a child who has already learnt to suppress their feelings with food.

If you want to learn more, I recommend 'The Aware Baby' by Aletha Solter and 'The Emotional Life of Babies' by me!

In my upcoming book,' I'm Here and I'm Listening', which is for parents of 1-8 year olds, I also talk a lot about this!

You can find out about my work here: www.marionrose.net

The Aware Parenting Virtual Village 2.0 is opening soon too! Keep an eye out on my socials or sign up for information about the early bird and my new books here: http://eepurl.com/8ifhn

You can also find me here:

https://www.instagram.com/_marion_rose_/

https://www.instagram.com/awareparenting/

www.facebook.com/MarionRosePhD

I'm so delighted that Carly Facius is back again! Carly is a Registered Midwife, International Board Certified Lactation Consultant, and holds a Master of Primary Maternity Care and is an Aware Parenting instructor.

Carly has already been on two episodes of The Aware Parenting Podcast: Episode 149 on Communicating with babies and Episode 154 on Reclaiming our power through birth.

I absolutely loved this conversation!

We are sending so much love to any woman who gave up breastfeeding before they were ready.

We discussed:

How birth affects breastfeeding;

What we can do in the hours after birth to support breastfeeding;

The centrality of observing our baby;

The research triangle of observation, information and listening to ourselves as parents;

Why the parent is the expert;

The importance of listening in to ourselves when we are given information about breastfeeding;

Learning to trust yourself and trust your baby;

How Aware Parenting is based on trusting a baby's innate wisdom;

The de-conditioning process in Aware Parenting to unlearn all the ways we learnt to not trust ourselves and our innate wisdom and the wisdom of babies and children;

How women often stop breastfeeding sooner than they want to because there is a lack of information or support;

Doing what feels right for you in terms of breastfeeding;

How any amount of continued breastfeeding benefits both baby and mother;

The incredible intelligence of the human body and how breastmilk adapts to protect babies' health;

Why mothers might worry that they don't have enough milk;

The size of babies' stomachs as they get older;

How I helped my son heal from the effects of his fast posterior birth as a newborn so that I could breastfeed him comfortably;

How a lot of confusion about why babies come on and off the breast can be clarified when a mother understands Aware Parenting;

What's really going on if a parent thinks that their baby is hungry but doesn't want to feed;

How understanding Aware Parenting can prevent people from offering solids earlier than recommended;

How the goal of introducing solids is building a healthy relationship with food;

What parents can do in terms of Aware Parenting it they're thinking of introducing solids early to help their baby sleep more at night;

How our culture likes to see babies as faulty or immature and Aware Parenting seens their innate wisdom that they are trying to help us understand;

How instead, we can focus on observing our baby to see what they're really communicating;

How important it is for us to have our feelings heard so we can actually see our baby's behaviour more clearly;

How natural it is for our own feelings related to food from when we were babies will come up when our babies are feeding;

How Aware Parenting can support mothers to continue breastfeeding for longer;

How Aware Parenting can create more ease and enjoyment in every stage of the breastfeeding journey;

Using limits and loving limits with breastfeeding;

What happens if a mother is saying yes when she has a no to breastfeeding;

How we do offer loving limits with breastfeeding but not solid foods;

Supporting mothers to say yes to continuing breastfeeding if they want to, when they might be coerced to stop or not ready to stop;

And to say no to a breastfeed their toddler if they have a no, either because of their own needs, or the toddler's;

How the journey of breastfeeding invites mothers to connect with our yeses and noes and our innate wisdom and to support our babies to be deeply connected with their innate wisdom with food;

Carly normally offers 1:1 sessions on breastfeeding and birth preparation and Aware Parenting but is 35 weeks pregnant and not working until next year.

However, you can find Carly and her work at www.seedpodfamilies.com or at https://www.instagram.com/seed_pod_/

If you want to find out more about breastfeeding and Aware Parenting, I recommend The Aware Baby by Aletha Solter and The Emotional Life of Babies by me!

After the last episode, I felt called to share more details about how things get in the way of children's innate body wisdom.

If our aim is wanting our child to make the most optimal food choices based on their bodily sensations as well as information from us and from their own prior experience about whether they enjoyed the food and how they felt afterwards, then knowing what can get in the way of that can be helpful, whilst also being compassionate with ourselves that we live in a culture that is set against us being deeply connected with our bodies and that it's hard not to be part of that.

I talk about a number of different things, such as shaming, food as rewards, advertising, family stress around meals, shoulding, using food to suppress feelings, past trauma, powerlessness and lots more, and each case, I include suggestions for how we can ameliorate these effects. I also offer parents to practice lots of self-compassion, attachment play and presence.

My next book, 'I'm Here and I'm Listening' is coming out soon, and The Aware Parenting Virtual Village 2.0 is opening soon too! Keep an eye out on my socials or sign up for information about the early bird here: http://eepurl.com/8ifhn