The Couples Therapist Couch

Click here to learn more about The Couples Therapist Inner Circle

Sometimes as Couples Therapists we forget that our job is not to "save" relationships. Sometimes that is just not possible. Our job is to help people grow, challenge their limiting beliefs, and live happily ever after whether they stay in their relationship or not.

Katherine Woodward Thomas has been a guide for helping people uncouple when they decide that staying in the relationship isn't the right choice for them. She is the author of Conscious Uncoupling: 5 Steps to Living Happily Even After and Calling in the One: 7 Weeks to Attracting the Love of Your Life.

Find out more about Katherine at www.consciousuncoupling.com

She has a free Workshop coming up called the Art of Conscious Completion: How to Avoid the 3 Most Common Breakup Mistakes that Cause Suffering, Steal Joy, and Prevent Future Love. Click for more details.

The Couples Therapist Couch is the podcast for Couples Therapists about the practice of couples therapy. I'm Shane Birkel and my goal is to bring you interviews with experts in the field of couples therapy each week.

Please subscribe to the podcast for more great episodes.

Learn more about joining the Couples Therapist Inner Circle

Click here to learn more about The Couples Therapist Inner Circle

Akilah Riley-Richardson is a published researcher, couples therapist, educator and presenter. I would highly recommend attending her training. I have copied and pasted part of the information page below which is also what we talked about in the podcast.

Find out more about the training here: Systemic Trauma in Couples Therapy

You have a precious opportunity with the couples you see:

You can help them grow their relational imagination — their ability to conceive of the intimacy they are worthy of.

Unfortunately, in many relationships, especially those where one or more partners has a marginalized identity, systemic trauma has made this very difficult.

From homophobia to racism to xenophobia, your clients may be impacted by marginalization… And even they might not be aware of how it is affecting their relationship.

But it does show up in intimate relationships. As hyper-aroused nervous systems, as disagreements about how to handle discrimination, as one partner feeling deeply, traumatically misunderstood.

Any of these responses to systemic trauma can deteriorate the couples' relational imagination to the point that they feel totally stuck.

For marginalized couples and partners, intimacy is often experienced as an elusive relational privilege.

I have developed a model for assessing and repairing the impacts of systemic trauma that I call the P.R.I.D.E. method. You can use this approach with couples who are reckoning with any kind of systemic trauma or marginalization to lead them to Liberatory Connections, greater intimacy, and increased relational privilege.

The Couples Therapist Couch is the podcast for Couples Therapists about the practice of couples therapy. The host, Shane Birkel, interviews an expert in the field of couples therapy each week.

Click here to learn more about The Couples Therapist Inner Circle

Please subscribe to the podcast for more great episodes.

Click here to learn more about The Couples Therapist Inner Circle

There is an emerging trend in our society right now of adults in their 20s and 30s continuing to live at home with their parents. There are a lot of reasons for this reality that I talk about on this episode with Dr. Lawrence Steinberg.

Dr. Larry is a professor of psychology and neuroscience at Temple University and author of several books on parenting. His new book, You and Your Adult Child: How to Grow Together in Challenging Times, was just published and is now available.

Get a copy of the book

Find out more about Dr. Steinberg at laurencesteinberg.com

The Couples Therapist Couch is the podcast for Couples Therapists about the practice of couples therapy. The host, Shane Birkel, interviews an expert in the field of couples therapy each week.

Please subscribe to the podcast for more great episodes.

Click here to learn more about The Couples Therapist Inner Circle

If you work with couples you know that a large percentage of the people seeking help have experienced some sort of infidelity in their relationship. Sometimes, people wonder if it's even worth trying to repair the relationship.

Even if you use the best possible interventions in therapy, some cases seem to not get any better. Dr. Talal Alsaleem and I discuss his new book called Unfaithful and Unrepentant: Affairs Beyond the Hope of Repair where he discusses this topic.

Dr. Talal Alsaleem is an expert at helping couples to do this. He also does training and supervision for other therapists to learn how to more effectively help couples who have been affected by infidelity.

Learn more about Dr. Talal Alsaleem here.

And here for training on working with affairs

The Couples Therapist Couch is the podcast for Couples Therapists about the practice of couples therapy. The host, Shane Birkel, interviews an expert in the field of couples therapy each week.

Please subscribe to the podcast for more great episodes.

Click here to learn more about the Couples Therapist Inner Circle

Back in episode number 176, Lousia Krause talked about using the Enneagram in Couples Therapy. In this episode, Kristy Gaisford and I continue that conversation and talk about what different personality types look like in a relationship. The enneagram is a system of personality types that helps people understand themselves and others. There are nine different personality types.

Find out more about Kristy Gaisford at loveworkrelationships.com

Find out more about the Enneagram 2.0 podcast

The Couples Therapist Couch is the podcast for Couples Therapists about the practice of couples therapy. The host, Shane Birkel, interviews an expert in the field of couples therapy each week.

Please subscribe to the podcast for more great episodes.

Find out more about the Couples Therapist Inner Circle

Please subscribe to the podcast for more great episodes.

Find out more about the Couples Therapist Inner Circle

If you've been working with couples for long, you know that betrayal is a theme that comes up a lot. Whether it is a full on sexual affair or just the small betrayals of everyday life. Many couples are going to need help healing in their relationships or possibly even grieving in a divorce situation.

LaDonna Carey has been a therapist for over 30 years, helping couples through the trauma of betrayal, both in their relationships and as individuals going through divorce.

You can find out more about her at ladonnacarey.com

The Couples Therapist Couch is the podcast for Couples Therapists about the practice of couples therapy. The host, Shane Birkel, interviews an expert in the field of couples therapy each week.

This episode is sponsored by Clearly Clinical Continuing Ed. Clearly Clinical is the nation's premier podcast Continuing Ed provider, and features industry experts from across the world. Clearly Clinical is an approved CE provider with the APA, ASWB, NBCC, NAADAC, CCAPP, and CAMFT, and is women-owned, founded by Elizabeth Irias, LMFT. Clearly Clinical supports minority and women presenters, and donates to Feeding America. And the best part? Clearly Clinical is literally the most affordable continuing ed provider in the country, bringing you unlimited CE courses for just $60 a year. As a promo for my listeners, you can use the code COUCH to get an additional 10% off. They have a number of free podcast CE courses, too, including a CE interview with Dr. Julie Gottman. Check those out at their website, ClearlyClinical.com.

Please subscribe to the podcast for more great episodes.

Find out more about the Couples Therapist Inner Circle

More than ever it is clear from the research that trauma has a huge impact on all of our relationships. It is important for therapists to have some background knowledge or training to help them maintain a sense of safety when people get triggered.

Irina Wen, PhD talks about how the attachment system works and how important self care is for therapists. She is a professor at NYU, an Emotionally Focused Supervisor and has a private practice.

You can find out more about her at touchtonepsychologynewyork.com

and irina_wen_psychologist on instagram

The Couples Therapist Couch is the podcast for Couples Therapists about the practice of couples therapy. The host, Shane Birkel, interviews an expert in the field of couples therapy each week.

This episode is sponsored by Clearly Clinical Continuing Ed. Clearly Clinical is the nation's premier podcast Continuing Ed provider, and features industry experts from across the world. Clearly Clinical is an approved CE provider with the APA, ASWB, NBCC, NAADAC, CCAPP, and CAMFT, and is women-owned, founded by Elizabeth Irias, LMFT. Clearly Clinical supports minority and women presenters, and donates to Feeding America. And the best part? Clearly Clinical is literally the most affordable continuing ed provider in the country, bringing you unlimited CE courses for just $60 a year. As a promo for my listeners, you can use the code COUCH to get an additional 10% off. They have a number of free podcast CE courses, too, including a CE interview with Dr. Julie Gottman. Check those out at their website, ClearlyClinical.com.

In this episode, Natalie Lue talks about her new book called, The Joy of Saying No: How to Stop People Pleasing, Reclaiming Boundaries, and Saying Yes to the Life You Want. We talked about how in order to say no to your partner it requires authenticity and vulnerability which are going to be helpful to the relationship overall.

Find out more about Natalie Lue at https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/

The Couples Therapist Couch is the podcast for Couples Therapists about the practice of couples therapy. The host, Shane Birkel, interviews an expert in the field of couples therapy each week.

Please subscribe to the podcast for more great episodes.

Find out more about the Couples Therapist Inner Circle

This episode is sponsored by Clearly Clinical Continuing Ed. Clearly Clinical is the nation's premier podcast Continuing Ed provider, and features industry experts from across the world. Clearly Clinical is an approved CE provider with the APA, ASWB, NBCC, NAADAC, CCAPP, and CAMFT, and is women-owned, founded by Elizabeth Irias, LMFT. Clearly Clinical supports minority and women presenters, and donates to Feeding America. And the best part? Clearly Clinical is literally the most affordable continuing ed provider in the country, bringing you unlimited CE courses for just $60 a year. As a promo for my listeners, you can use the code COUCH to get an additional 10% off. They have a number of free podcast CE courses, too, including a CE interview with Dr. Julie Gottman. Check those out at their website, ClearlyClinical.com.

In this episode, Louisa Krause talks about using the Enneagram in Couples Therapy. The Enneagram is a system of personality types that helps people understand themselves and others. It is principally understood and taught as a typology of nine interconnected personality types.

Find out more about Louisa Krause at relationalsolutions.net

Find more enneagram stuff for therapists through The Narrative Enneagram

The Couples Therapist Couch is the podcast for Couples Therapists about the practice of couples therapy. The host, Shane Birkel, interviews an expert in the field of couples therapy each week.

Please subscribe to the podcast for more great episodes.

Find out more about the Couples Therapist Inner Circle

This episode is sponsored by Clearly Clinical Continuing Ed. Clearly Clinical is the nation's premier podcast Continuing Ed provider, and features industry experts from across the world. Clearly Clinical is an approved CE provider with the APA, ASWB, NBCC, NAADAC, CCAPP, and CAMFT, and is women-owned, founded by Elizabeth Irias, LMFT. Clearly Clinical supports minority and women presenters, and donates to Feeding America. And the best part? Clearly Clinical is literally the most affordable continuing ed provider in the country, bringing you unlimited CE courses for just $60 a year. As a promo for my listeners, you can use the code COUCH to get an additional 10% off. They have a number of free podcast CE courses, too, including a CE interview with Dr. Julie Gottman. Check those out at their website, ClearlyClinical.com.

Find out more about the Couples Therapist Inner Circle

This episode is a miniworkshop on how to work with people who are emotionally avoidant. There are two primary ways that emotional avoidance gets formed based on the environment in which the person grew up.

The Couples Therapist Couch is the podcast for Couples Therapists about the practice of couples therapy. The host, Shane Birkel, interviews an expert in the field of couples therapy each week.

Please subscribe to the podcast for more great episodes.

Find out more about the Couples Therapist Inner Circle

This episode is sponsored by Clearly Clinical Continuing Ed. Clearly Clinical is the nation's premier podcast Continuing Ed provider, and features industry experts from across the world. Clearly Clinical is an approved CE provider with the APA, ASWB, NBCC, NAADAC, CCAPP, and CAMFT, and is women-owned, founded by Elizabeth Irias, LMFT. Clearly Clinical supports minority and women presenters, and donates to Feeding America. And the best part? Clearly Clinical is literally the most affordable continuing ed provider in the country, bringing you unlimited CE courses for just $60 a year. As a promo for my listeners, you can use the code COUCH to get an additional 10% off. They have a number of free podcast CE courses, too, including a CE interview with Dr. Julie Gottman. Check those out at their website, ClearlyClinical.com.