Neurodiverse Love with Mona Kay

The ND Lovers Club-How ND Women Lust, Like and Love-Bontle Senne & Sara-Louise Ackrill


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During this episode, with authors Bontle Senne and Sara-Louise Ackrill we talk about their new book "The ND Lovers Club-How Women Lust, Like and Love" and I hope all of you will buy this book today!


Bontle is an AuDHD speaker, sex and ADHD coach and global transformation leader. Sara-Louise is a renowned neurodiversity specialist therapist and coach, professional speaker, and social entrepreneur. Together, they share so much valuable information that we all need to understand if we are ND women, or want to build a relationship with an ND woman. Some of the topics we address in this very candid conversation include:

  • Why do you want to be in a relationship and how do you want to show-up?
  • Unmasking before or during a relationship.
  • Learning to relax and do things alongside someone.
  • Parallel play or being “alone together”.
  • The challenge of taking things personally when you don’t understand each others needs.
  • What to do during unstructured time.
  • Debunking damaging myths.
  • We need more visibility on all the issues that people across  the spectrum experience.
  • What does it mean to be clitmatized, dickmatized or to have “emotional support dick”.
  • Using sex as a substitute to get something else.
  • Sex may be used to avoid eye contact, conflict, the effort of getting to know someone, and small talk.
  • Understand what you each define as sexual and explore whether sex is “responsive or spontaneous” for each of you.
  • You don’t have to minimize your discomfort and assume that you’re not the problem.
  • Yes, No, Maybe Checklist available through “Sex with Emily” podcast.
  • Understand your sexual story and the messages you got as a kid and share this information with your partner so you can understand each other better.
  • May want to write down or share your fantasies with your partner, even if you may never explore them.
  • Understand more about what it means to be asexual, aromantic, demisexual, bisexual, and what sexiness means to you and your partner.
  • Trauma may impact your sexual interests or preferences.
  • Embrace your imagination about what is possible in your relationship.
  • You can learn more about the book, Bontle and Sarah here or check them out on LinkedIn


To learn more about the Neurodiverse Love Documentary or to see the trailer for the film click here. If you would like to learn more about the other resources Mona offers check out the links below: 

Buy the Neurodiverse Love Conversation Cards or Workbook

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Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayBy Neurodiverse Love with Mona Kay

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