Language of Love with Dr. Laura Berman

The Real Reason You’re Stuck in the Same Fight (Again and Again)


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Do you ever feel like your relationship is stuck in a loop? The same fights, the same frustrations, the same silent distance—even though you both want things to be better.

Here’s the truth: Your partner’s baggage fits yours perfectly. The work isn’t to change them—it’s to unpack your own while holding space for theirs.

In this raw and revealing Language of Love session, Brian and Stacey lay bare their struggle—blame, withdrawal, and the aching fear of not being enough. Stacey is fighting to reclaim her voice after trauma, wondering if her needs even matter.Brian admits he’s been avoiding effort, hiding behind the excuse of being “too busy.”

Their story is your story. The tiny misunderstandings that explode into disconnection. The love that’s there but buried under frustration. The desperate hope that things could be different—if only they knew how.

If you've ever felt invisible in your relationship, used "busyness" as an excuse to avoid hard conversations, wondered why affection feels like a battleground, or found yourself trapped in the blame-defend-withdraw cycle, this episode will leave you breathless—and give you the tools to break free.

Here’s what you’ll learn in this episode:

  •  Why “I don’t have time” is often code for avoidance—and how to fix it

  •  The silent killer of relationships: unspoken expectations around affection

  •  How just 10 minutes of intentional time can rebuild connection

  •  The Drama Triangle (Victim, Villain, Hero)—and how to step off it

  •  How to ask for love without triggering defensiveness

  •  Why childhood wounds keep replaying in your relationship—and how to stop them

  •  Non-sexual touch: The secret to rebuilding emotional safety

  •  How to hold space for both love and frustration (yes, it’s possible!)

    Ready to Heal?

    Take my free quiz and start 7 Days to Better Sex to transform intimacy today. For deeper trauma work, explore EMDR and the Drama Triangle—because love shouldn’t hurt this much.

    Your story isn’t over yet. Let’s rewrite it together.

    Got questions? Email me at [email protected]

    Share this episode—love grows when we heal together.


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