This is a first for The Scarlet Edit. Hope was a married woman who cheated on her husband and has been bravely sharing that experience on social media.

In this episode, she sits down with me for her very first podcast and walks through the full story of how her affair started, from the moment at a stoplight where she questioned whether her marriage was all her life would ever be, to the slow unraveling of communication with her husband, to meeting the man she'd eventually cheat with.

Hope vulnerably shares about why she didn't just leave, even though she tried more than once. She talks about the unique trap of being married to a "good guy" when your unhappiness doesn't feel like a valid enough reason to walk away. She even admits she used to fantasize about her husband cheating on her so she'd finally have a reason to leave.

She shares how the affair began through a shared work project, how the emotional connection formed before anything physical happened, and the exact moment it officially crossed the line.

We get into the guilt, the shame, the compartmentalization, and her powerful description of what it actually feels like to live inside an affair while you're still married.

Hope calls it the worst best time of her life. There's no peace when you're living in deception, and no amount of highs can outrun that darkness.

This is part one of a two-part conversation. Come back next week for part 2!

Connect with Hope on Instagram

New episodes every Thursday.

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I responded to every YouTube comment I got about my affair. Of the comments I share in this episode, only one person wrote me back. So, let's talk about it!

This week I'm reading eight comments out loud and giving my unfiltered responses. One person told me 90% of men will cheat no matter what. Another called me a toy who was manipulated. Someone told me I need God. And the longest comment asked what I'd do if it happened to me.

I talk about why I don't perform regret for strangers, why I still believe infidelity is a symptom and not the problem, and why none of us actually know what we'd do in a situation until we're living it. I also push back on the idea that being kept a secret means you weren't loved, because I disagree completely.

If you left one of these comments, come back. Let's keep the conversation going.

New episodes every Thursday.

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Why do smart, successful people end up in affairs — and then can't leave? What's actually driving the pattern? And how do you know if you're settling or self-sabotaging?

In this episode, I sit down with Katarina Polonska — behavioral scientist, executive relationship strategist, and someone whose own family was torn apart by infidelity. Katarina watched her father's affair destroy her parents' marriage, then found herself repeating the exact same pattern in her own engagement. That wake-up call led her to build a methodology that's now helped hundreds of high performers break the cycle.

We get into the subconscious fear that keeps high performers trapped in double lives, why traditional therapy kept Katarina going in circles for 15 years, what it actually takes to know whether you should stay or go, and why only about 4% of affair relationships survive the transition — and what the ones that make it have in common.

Whether you're the one being betrayed, the one doing the betraying, or the other woman wondering where you fit in all of this — this conversation will challenge how you think about every relationship you're in.

Guest: Katarina Polonska — Behavioral Scientist, Executive Relationship Strategist, Founder of Successfully in Love®

LinkedIn: Katarina Polonska

New episodes every Thursday.

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Kristin Cabot — the woman from the Coldplay Kiss Cam — finally told her side of the story on Oprah's podcast. She was already separated. He told her he was too. But only one of them got death threats, drive-bys, and 500 calls a day.

90% of the hate came from other women. Every single in-person confrontation — a woman.

I talk about what Kristin revealed, the double standard between how she and Andy Byron were treated, why we judge affairs so harshly, and why women tearing down other women is the part of this story that should bother all of us.

This one's a call for collective grace — and a promise to do better.

New episodes every Thursday.

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There's a stat that gets cited everywhere in the infidelity space — that 56% of men and 34% of women who cheat rate their marriages as happy.

It shows up in therapy blogs, Reddit threads, podcasts, and articles, and it's used to push the narrative that cheating is random and unpredictable.

I'm calling BS. Not on the data itself, but on what people are doing with it.

In this episode, I break down why self-reporting is flawed, why "happy" has become a dangerously low bar, and why I firmly believe that nobody wakes up and decides to have an affair.

I also tie in data from my Ashley Madison episode, challenge myself on my own belief that happiness is a choice, and share why I think the people who actually do the work in their relationships are the ones who don't end up with cracks. If you've ever heard "it could happen to anyone" and thought that sounded like a cop-out — this one's for you.

Related episode: The Truth About Affairs: Sexless Marriages, Emotional Validation, and Modern Love

New episodes every Thursday.

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I actively choose happiness and joy every single day — and the more I share that, the more it seems to confuse people.

In this episode, I'm getting into the mindset behind everything I do on The Scarlet Edit. Why positivity is my baseline, how my upbringing shaped me in ways that defy the stereotypes people project onto women like me, and the specific moments in my life — from my divorce at 38 to ending a five-year affair to a situationship that wrecked me — that brought me to the decision to stop letting anyone else dictate my emotions.

I also talk about the moment in a hotel bathroom in Greece where I said "I value myself" out loud, why controlling only what I can control has been the single biggest contributor to my happiness, and the origin story of how The Scarlet Edit came to be — from a rough talk at a retreat in Austin to the lightbulb moment that changed everything.

Plus, I address shame head-on, share a wild YouTube comment exchange, and explain why the expectation that I should feel ashamed says more about society than it does about me.

If you've been wondering how to get to the other side of shame, grief, or starting over — this is the episode.

Related episode: The Role of Shame in Divorce, Affairs & Betrayal | Dr. Zoe Shaw

New episodes every Thursday.

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Ashley Madison just rebranded — and 57% of their new users are single. I break down what that means and why dating app fatigue is pushing people toward discretion.

Then I go somewhere I haven’t gone before: the waiting.

What it actually feels like to wait for a married man to leave his wife. The holidays alone, the phone that doesn’t ring, the stories you tell yourself to make it feel normal, and the moment I finally said I’m done.

If you’ve ever Googled “waiting for a married man to leave” and found nothing but shame and judgment, this episode is for you.

I’m sharing my experience — the real version, not the Reddit version. Because you deserve to hear from someone who’s actually been there.

Key Takeaways

• Waiting for a married man to leave is one of the most Googled phrases in the affair space — and every top result is shame, judgment, or a sales pitch. This episode exists to change that.
• The loneliness of being the other woman isn’t just about being alone on holidays. It’s about having the biggest thing in your life and not being able to share it with anyone.
• “Just leave” is the worst advice you can give someone in this situation. Emotional bonds don’t have an off switch. Instead, leave the door open for her to talk without judgment.
• The stories we tell ourselves — “he’ll choose me eventually,” “it’s only a matter of time” — feel real because the love feels real. That doesn’t make the situation right for you.
• You deserve to be chosen from the start. Not eventually. Not after the kids are older. Not after the holidays. From the start.

Related episode: My conversation with Ashley Madison’s Chief Strategy Officer, Paul Keable

New episodes every Thursday.

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A year ago I was struggling with how to share my story with the world — I was the other woman in a five-year relationship with a married man, while I felt no shame, it was the secret I carried for years. And now, a year into The Scarlet Edit, I realized I've unintentionally put myself in a new kind of box.

This episode is me getting honest about that. I talk about what happened after I shared my biggest secret, why I've been struggling with what to post and how to show up, and how a conversation with my business coach helped some things click into place.

I also read the brand new description I wrote for The Scarlet Edit — and honestly, I got emotional reading it. It finally captures who I am, what this show is, and who it's for.

If you've ever felt like you're more than the one chapter of your life people want to define you by — this one's for you.

New episodes every Thursday.

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Henry VIII had six wives. One wife for 24 years, then five more in the next 11. He was pursuing the next woman while still married to the current one every single time — and he was running an entire country while doing it. So much for "I'm too busy."

In this episode of Affairs Through the Ages, I'm walking through every wife, every affair, and the pattern that never changed. From the annulment that broke England away from the Catholic Church to the teenager who was beheaded at 18, this story is wild. But what really got me is the women — in a world where they had no legal rights, no property, and no ability to say no to a king, they still found a way to play the game. And some of them played it brilliantly.

I also dig into what was actually going on with Henry — the jousting accident that may have caused a traumatic brain injury, the 32-inch waist that became a 52-inch waist, and how unchecked power turned a golden prince into a tyrant.

In This Episode:

• Who Henry was before the monster and what changed
• His mistresses before the six wives (and why they matter)
• All six wives: the affairs, the strategies, and what each one reveals about Henry
• The annulment that created the Church of England
• Why "if he wanted to, he would" has been true for 500 years

Research for this episode draws on biographical and historical sources including Britannica, Historic Royal Palaces, History.com, Royal Museums Greenwich, and published works by Tracy Borman, Elizabeth Norton, Suzannah Lipscomb, Lucy Worsley, David Starkey, and Alison Weir. All commentary and analysis is my own.

New episodes every Thursday.

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Is Love is Blind actually proving that love IS blind — or is it proving the exact opposite?

After nine completed seasons, the data tells a pretty damning story: 55 engagements, only 14 marriages, and a 43% divorce rate.

In this episode, I break down the surprising parallels between what happens in the pods and how emotional affairs actually work — the deep connections with multiple people, comparing partners, fantasy access, keeping the door cracked open, and what happens when reality finally sets in.

I also unpack why physical attraction matters more than the show wants to admit, call out the double standard between how we judge reality TV behavior vs. real life, and share a raw, unplanned personal revelation about exclusivity in my own past relationship.

Whether you're a Love is Blind fan or not, this episode will make you think differently about emotional connection, fantasy, and what it actually takes for love to survive reality.

New episodes every Thursday.

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