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Life changing? Really? YES! There is something that I realized years ago that changed my life for the better. Something that every woman, especially single moms, should discover for themselves if they haven't already.
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In this episode I chat with Melissa Salmeron, Certified Master Life coach and mother of three. We dive into setting boundaries and why they are so important for not only you but for your children as well. You will learn the power of an "I" statement and how to effectively set boundaries for yourself.
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Recently I saw a video from America's Got Talent where a beautiful girl who is fighting cancer sang a song she wrote herself. The song was beautiful, her performance was beautiful and she got a golden buzzer from Simon. During her interview she revealed that she had only a 2% chance of survival but she was an absolute vision of light and positivity. When asked about it she said something that inspired me and this podcast episode... she said " You can't with until your life isn't hard anymore before you decide to be happy." Happiness can be a choice but often we choose to dwell in the negative. I learned years ago that my life was so much better when I chose to be happy.
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I remember spending years feeling just blah! Always being irate or on the verge of tears. I let everything get to me - especially my ex. There were days that the stress and unhappiness was so overwhelming that I literally felt it like a weight on me. It took me a while to figure out what was keeping me from my personal zen, my inner peace. But once I figured it out and ways to work through it...things were so much better. I FELT so much better.
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The school year has ended for us here in Colorado and it was a doozy! We all had to struggle through how to help our kids through a year of school during a pandemic. As far as I'm concerned if you made it out alive and mostly unscathed you are a winner lady! There are some things that this school year taught me though, and this episode is about a few of those things!
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Have you ever gotten to the point where you are down to the bone, feel it in your core, to you soul tired? Because you are the one who is doing it all. The one who can't drop the ball. Maybe you feel like you don't have any help or you can't ask for help. I feel like we have all been there at some point. But what happens when that is how you feel ALL THE TIME? When you have reached a breaking point.
You have to recognize that isn't how it is supposed to be. Your default setting shouldn't be stressed and unhappy. This weeks episode is all about that feeling and how you can help yourself release some of that burden.
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One of my listeners recently reached out to me and asked for some advice. Listening to her story I was struck by how similar it was to mine. How I felt at the very beginning of my journey as a single mom and it made me realize how far I had come over these past years. I remember the worry and the emotions that I went through in the beginning. Some of the expectations I had and a LOT of the animosity that I felt. I thought about how many years I spent, wasted really, feeling so angry and upset. I wish I had known then all of the things that I know now. So I thought that maybe some of you other moms out there might be able to benefit from the advice I gave as well.
I know that I don't know your story and my advice may not fit your individual scenario BUT some of it might help. I wish I had not wasted so much time being so upset and if I can help even one of you get to a better place faster than I did then it is worth it.
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Let's face it, we all have baggage. The crap that we carry around with us from one experience to the next. Old wounds, hurts, emotional trauma, pain, loss, resentment, fears... it all follows us. Most of us. Unfortunately, whether we like it or not we are probably putting some of that on our children.
I recently interviewed Kerri Hummingbird best selling author, Soul Guide and host of the Soul Nectar Show. Her recent book "Love Is Fierce: Healing the Mother Wound" talks about how for thousands of years, mothers have been disempowered, shamed, belittled, and abused. As a result, many mothers have developed victim mentalities which result in their being unable to love fully, neglecting their loved ones, and even competing with their children for control and attention. A woman with the Mother Wound will experience an intense struggle not to pass it on to her children.
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I have a confession to make. I kinda suck at co-parenting. At least I did for a really long time. There are many reasons for that:
There were many reasons that I struggled with co-parenting with my daughters father and it took a lot of time and work to get better at it. This episode is all about my initial (and some continuing) struggles with co-parenting, how I worked through some of them AND tips to help if you too are struggling with co-parenting.
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Recently there was a buzz around a certain celebrity's untouched photo being shared on the internet. She had a very big problem with that image because it was untouched, un-filtered and (in my opinion) real! Now she had her reasons for not liking it and I get that BUT what is that telling the girls out there? That if you don't look perfect you don't look good? And WHO gets to decide what perfect looks like?
Why do we as women beat ourselves up because we don't look like models? Or because we don't look like we used to in our 20s? Or BEFORE we had kids?
And when we beat ourselves up and say mean things about ourselves what does that teach our daughters (and sons) to do?
Developing a healthy body image is so very important especially if you have daughters!
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