The Single Mom Podcast - Single Parent Advice, Support & a Little Bit of Humor

Everyone wants to talk about the Slap Heard 'Round the World, but instead of addressing that I want to talk about a recent article about Viola Davis and what happened when Will Smith asked her this question. Will Smith told her "I will always be that boy who's girlfriend broke up with him"... and she thought no matter her accomplishments, deep down she was a little black third grade girl who got chased home by a group of white boys. This made me stop and think... 'who am I' ... what in my past was that defining moment that influence me so profoundly that it would stick with me years and years later?

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None of us like to think about anything bad happening to us BUT we all know that at some point it will. Too often we aren't ready for that. We don't have things in place to help our loved ones manage all the details of our lives after we pass away OR if we are medically not capable of making decisions.

I know it isn't a sexy topic and I know that it seems a bit morbid to think about now but it is so very important. What happens to your kids? How will they be cared for? How will people access funds to take care of your children and their needs? Where are all your important documents? All of these things and more are so very important and we need to have a plan in place, especially as single moms.

Today we talk with David Edey who wrote the book on helping executors know all the things they will need to know as well as what YOU need to know to help them.

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Let's face it, the men have been running things all this time and still haven't seemed to make things much better. In fact there are a lot of things that are getting worse. So I think it is WAY past time for women to hold more seats in power. In fact, I think single moms should run the world. There are so many reasons why I think single moms could run things a whole lot better than the stodgy old men have been. This weeks episode is all about why single moms should run the world.

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This weeks episode is all about that feeling of complete exhaustion. I am not talking about your regular tired from working and taking care of the kids ... but that down to your bones, feel it in your soul mental, physical and emotional exhaustion. I used to feel that every day until I realize some of the things that were causing it and how I could eliminate them from my life. Now, I rarely feel that way anymore.

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Many people will struggle with codependency in their relationships. Some deal with it in romantic relationships, some with their relationships with their parents and sometimes even with their kids. Codependency can be very toxic and too often women struggle with it more than men do. Let's face it, we've all likely been in a relationship where we experienced it. This episode is all about identifying the signs of codependency, because once you recognize it you can hopefully break the pattern.

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We've talked about how important boundaries are for ourselves as parents but what about for our kids? Not the rules and boundaries that we as parents set for our kids but the boundaries that they set for themselves. Are their boundaries any LESS important than ours? What message are we sending them if we don't respect their boundaries?

Do you read your daughter's journal? Have you forced your 5 year old to give grandma a kiss, even though they didn't want to?

As important as it is for us as parents to model what healthy boundaries can look like, it is JUST as important for them to feel that we respect the boundaries that they set.

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TRIGGER WARNING - This episode talks about very sensitive topics

I typically try to stay away from REALLY controversial topics but after Texas passed the Heartbeat Bill last week I found I couldn't do that this time. This weeks episode is about why I am so angry about this bill, bodily autonomy and why I believe it is so important that every person be allowed to make a choice. We are not incubators...we are people and we should be allowed to make our own choices.

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We all know that too often we as moms lose ourselves in our kids and being "mom". Sometimes so much so that once the kids have grown up and moved away we don't know what to do with ourselves. We don't even really know who we are. This weeks podcast is an interview with Jen McGuire, a single mom of 4 adult sons who decided to take a trip to Europe to finally figure out who she was outside of mom.

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Quite often when my birthday rolls around I start to think about where I am and who I am. It has started to get worse the last few years though because the kids are getting older too and soon they will all be adults and out of the house. So now I am thinking about who I am outside of being their mom... and I realize that somewhere along the way I lost a lot of myself in being a mom. So when they are gone who will I be then?

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We just returned from a 2 week vacation back easy (which is why there weren't any episodes the past 2 weeks) - and during our trip my teenage daughter had some ups and downs. The downs put me in a position where I had to remember not to take things that I couldn't control or do anything about personally. As moms we tend to feel guilty or internalize when our kids are unhappy or angry or sad. Sometimes we feel like its our fault - sometimes it is. However, more often than not it likely doesn't even have anything to do with us and we need to remember not to take those moments personally.

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