Jack Donovan is an author known for his writing on masculinity and tribalism. He is the author of The Way of Men which answers the question, “what is masculinity?”

Favorite Success Quote

“There is a difference between being good at being a man and being a good man.” – Jack Donovan

Key Points

1. Build Your Strength

If you want to be seen as a real man and have the self-confidence and respect that comes with it, then you must become a master of the four tactical virtues: Strength, courage, mastery and honor.

Strength is just what it sounds like.

If you want to be a truly masculine man, you need to have a high level of physical and mental strength.

You must be able to lift heavy objects, endure pain, and handle yourself in conflict.

Subconsciously, women and other men will judge you based on your perceived strength.

If you are constantly displaying signs of weakness in your body, your mentality, or your conviction, you will lose trust from the people who matter most and lack the confidence you need to thrive in life.

2. Be Courageous

Courage, the second virtue, is typically a by-product of strength.

Whenever you have high levels of self-confidence and real strength that you have tested in battle (the gym or the octagon), you will be able to charge into unknown situations with courage and fearlessness.

This is imperative for success in all areas of life.

How can a woman trust you if you don’t have the courage to speak your mind and be honest with her?

How can you business partners trust you if you don’t have the courage to make difficult decisions?

How can you trust yourself if you are constantly cowering away from challenges and never pushing yourself to be more?

The more courage you display, the greater trust you will have in yourself and the more trust others will place in you.

3. Practice Mastery

The third tactical virtue and the topic of much discussion in recent years, mastery is what truly separates the boys from the men.

Regardless of the craft, all men respect a master.

They respect a master marksman, a master programmer, a master weight lifter, master seducer, and a master entrepreneur.

If you want to truly be held in the highest level of esteem by your peers and by society, then you must commit yourself to mastery.

Whatever craft you decide to master, you must be willing to endure the brutal hours and sustained periods of practice.

But at the end of the day, when you are one of the greatest in the world, all of the pain and hardship will be worth it, and you can consider yourself an even better man.

4. Embrace the Importance of Honor

Honor, the final of the four tactical virtues is where the rubber truly meets the road.

If you are strong, courageous, and masterful, but you do not have honor, if other men cannot trust you, if you do not keep your word, and you do not manage your reputation, then you are not a real man.

Honor is not about dying for a noble cause or serving in battle, it’s simply about guarding your reputation.

It’s about doing what you said you would do and showing up in all situations with integrity and conviction.

Without honor, the other four virtues are for naught.

5. Build Your Tribe and Complete Your Rite 

To embrace masculinity and become the best man that you can be, you must build your tribe of men and go through a rite of passage.

Men need time with other men away from the influence of women.

We need time to fight and be wild, time to embrace our wildness, and time to let it all out.

Once you have found that group, it’s important that you undergo some sort of rite of passage signaling your passage from boyhood to manhood.

It might seem simple, but creating an intentional rite and seeing it through is one of the most powerful things that you can do both for your psyche and your confidence.