This Is Woman's Work with Nicole Kalil

Resilience has become a buzzword in today’s culture, thrown around by influencers, coaches, and even bootcamp instructors, all insisting we need to “push through” no matter the cost. But is resilience always the healthiest path forward? Does mental toughness, positivity, and grit serve us in the ways we think—or is there more nuance to uncover?

In this episode, Nicole connects with Soraya Chemaly, activist and author of The Resilience Myth: New Thinking on Grit, Strength, and Growth after Trauma. Together, they challenge conventional ideas about resilience and explore a new way of thinking—one that shifts from individual grit to collective care and community connection. Soraya’s previous book, Rage Becomes Her: The Power of Women’s Anger, was widely acclaimed and named one of the Best Books of 2018 by the Washington Post, NPR, and Psychology Today.

This conversation offers insight into what really matters: kindness, compassion, belonging, and care—for ourselves and each other. It’s time to rethink resilience as more than just strength in isolation and embrace what it looks like to thrive, together.

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Connect With Our Guest: Soraya Chemaly

Website: https://www.sorayachemaly.com/ 

Book: https://www.sorayachemaly.com/books 

Simon & Schuster: https://www.simonandschuster.com/ 

Related Podcast Episodes:

How to Ask for Help with Dr. Cynthia Bentzen-Mercer

Stress Less and Fear(Less) with Rebecca Heiss

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We’ve been taught that success means pushing harder, doing more, and staying productive at all costs. But what if the real secret to sustainable success isn’t grinding harder — it’s learning how to pace yourself?

In this episode, Nicole sits down with award-winning journalist and author Elizabeth Svoboda to unpack the science, psychology, and strategy behind pacing. From elite athletes to ambitious women juggling careers, relationships, and impossible expectations, this conversation explores why burnout isn’t proof of dedication — it’s often proof that something needs to change.

Elizabeth shares how elite performers actually use rest, recovery, flexibility, and energy management to stay at the top of their game for the long haul. Together, Nicole and Elizabeth challenge hustle culture, perfectionism, and the toxic belief that women should operate at 110% all the time.

They discuss:

Why ambitious women tend to swing between overworking and complete exhaustion

The surprising pacing lessons we can learn from Olympic athletes

How burnout impacts confidence, relationships, health, and creativity

The concept of “rigid flexibility” and why structure alone doesn’t work

Why rest should match effort — not just be treated as a reward

How to recognize your personal energy rhythms and work with them instead of against them

The connection between pacing, longevity, and sustainable success

Why slowing down can actually make you more effective, focused, and fulfilled

Because constantly running yourself into the ground isn’t strength — it’s just a socially rewarded form of self-destruction.

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Connect with Elizabeth:

Book: https://www.simonandschuster.com/books/The-Art-of-Pacing/Elizabeth-Svoboda/9781668022412 

Website: https://www.elizabethsvoboda.com 

IG: https://www.instagram.com/svobodster/ 

LI: https://www.linkedin.com/in/elizabethsvoboda/ 

Newsletter: https://elizabeth-svoboda.beehiiv.com 

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Easing the mental load, minimizing the to-do list, letting go of the things that don’t really matter is a constant work in progress for me – but when I’m in the throes of it all, I often think “there’s got to be a better way”.

I’ve invited Sam Bennett, creativity/productivity specialist, to join us to share her 15-minute method with all of us. Sam is the author of the bestselling book Get It Done as well as Start Right Where You Are: How Little Changes Can Make a Big Difference for Overwhelmed Procrastinators, Frustrated Overachievers, and Recovering Perfectionists. Her latest book is called The 15-Minute Method: The Surprisingly Simple Art of Getting It Done. Having spent most of her life working as a professional actor and improvisor, Sam brings a quick wit to her writing and her work as a top instructor on LinkedIn Learning with over a million “learners” worldwide. 

It will all get narrowed down to those very few things that matter most at the end, so what are we waiting for? Someone else to decide what truly matters for us? A point in time where things all of a sudden get easy and simple?

No, we get to decide. And like so many things worth doing, we start small, one step at a time, 15 minutes devoted to what matters most to you. 

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Connect with Sam:

Website:  www.TheRealSamBennett.com  

Book: https://www.amazon.com/15-Minute-Method-Surprisingly-Simple-Getting/dp/1608689069 

FB: https://www.facebook.com/TheRealSamBennett  

IG: https://www.instagram.com/therealsambennett  

X: https://twitter.com/realsambennett  

LI: https://www.linkedin.com/in/therealsambennett   

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@SamanthaBennettCreative  

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Why do so many women immediately question themselves the moment they set a boundary, speak directly, or stop over-explaining? In this unfiltered and unhinged episode, Nicole Kalil digs into the exhausting mental spiral behind asking “Am I being a bitch?” — and why that question might actually be proof that women have been conditioned to prioritize likability over self-respect.

Nicole unpacks the difference between being cruel and simply refusing to shrink yourself to make other people comfortable. From boundary-setting and ambition to people-pleasing and over-functioning, this episode challenges the outdated expectation that women must always be agreeable, accommodating, and “nice.”

Why women disproportionately question whether they’re “too much”

The difference between being powerful and being unkind

How guilt shows up when women stop over-giving

Why boundaries trigger discomfort — and why that’s not your problem

The danger of outsourcing self-worth to other people’s opinions

How to stop confusing honesty with cruelty

Better questions to ask instead of “Am I being a bitch?”

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Connect with Nicole:

Subscribe to Nicole’s Substack: https://nicolekalil.substack.com/ 

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Women are constantly told to trust their bodies… right up until their bodies start telling them something medicine can’t immediately explain.

In this powerful and deeply validating conversation, Nicole sits down with Amy Kurtz — certified health coach, patient advocate, speaker, and author of But You Look Fine: Trapped in the Hell Between Sick and Well and How to Break Free — to unpack the emotional aftermath of chronic illness, medical gaslighting, invisible symptoms, and the complicated grief that comes from losing trust in your own body.

Amy shares her experience navigating late-stage Lyme disease, seeing 36 doctors before getting answers, and what she calls “medical trauma brain” — the hypervigilance, anxiety, and identity loss that can remain long after physical symptoms improve. Together, Nicole and Amy explore why so many women feel dismissed in healthcare settings, how chronic illness reshapes relationships and self-trust, and why healing is about far more than just getting a diagnosis.

This episode is for every woman who has ever walked out of a doctor’s office feeling unheard, minimized, or crazy — and for every person who’s ever been told, “But you look fine.”

How chronic illness and invisible symptoms impact identity and self-trust

The concept of “medical trauma brain” and illness after the illness

Why healing isn’t linear — physically or emotionally

Practical nervous system regulation tools for anxiety and hypervigilance

How to support loved ones dealing with chronic illness or perimenopause

The connection between women’s health, appearance, and societal expectations

Why rebuilding agency over your body is essential to healing

This conversation is equal parts rage, relief, validation, and empowerment — the kind that makes you feel less alone and more equipped to trust yourself again.

Thank you to our sponsors!

Become a Fora Advisor today at Foratravel.com/WOMAN - and make sure to tell them we sent you!

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Connect with Amy:

Book: https://www.amazon.com/But-You-Look-Fine-Trapped-ebook/dp/B0FPC9TV2P    

Website: https://amykurtz.com/ 

IG: https://www.instagram.com/_amykurtz/ 

Publisher: https://www.hachettebookgroup.com/titles/amy-kurtz/but-you-look-fine/9781538775301/

Related Podcast Episodes

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We call grocery workers “essential” — right up until it’s time to pay them. In this episode, Nicole sits down with journalist, activist, and author Ann Larson to unpack the hidden realities of low-wage labor, economic inequality, and the corporate systems keeping millions of workers struggling to survive.

Drawing from her experience working as a grocery store cashier during the pandemic, Ann shares what most consumers never see: workers skipping meals, elderly employees unable to retire, women wearing diapers behind registers because breaks are denied, and employees lacking basic healthcare while generating billions for major corporations.

Ann Larson is a journalist and activist whose work on education debt and low-wage labor has appeared in The New Republic, The Nation, Fast Company, and The Chronicle of Higher Education. She’s the co-author of Can’t Pay Won’t Pay: The Case for Economic Disobedience and Debt Abolition and author of Clean Up on Aisle Five, a powerful look inside the realities of supermarket labor in America.

In this episode, Nicole and Ann discuss:

Why there’s no such thing as “unskilled labor”

The hidden emotional and technical skills required in grocery work

How corporate consolidation impacts wages, communities, and poverty rates

The connection between consumer spending and worker treatment

Why unionization and antitrust laws matter more than most people realize

How economic inequality affects all of us — not just low-wage workers

What shoppers can do to support ethical labor practices

Why voting with your dollars matters

Because if people working full-time jobs still can’t afford food, healthcare, or retirement, the system isn’t broken — it’s working exactly as designed. The question is whether we’re willing to keep funding it.

Thank you to our sponsors!

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Connect with Ann:

Book: https://www.simonandschuster.com/books/Cleanup-on-Aisle-Five/Ann-Larson/9781668094501   

Website: https://annlarsonwrites.com/ 

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Pregnancy and childbirth have somehow become competitive sports — complete with judgment, unsolicited opinions, internet “experts,” and enough mom guilt to last a lifetime before the baby even arrives.

In this episode, Nicole sits down with labor and delivery nurse, viral creator, and bestselling author Jen Hamilton to unpack the unrealistic expectations women face around birth, pain management, advocacy, and motherhood itself. Jen shares why rigid birth plans often set women up for disappointment, how “birth vibes” create space for empowerment and adaptability, and what every woman deserves to feel during labor: heard, respected, informed, and safe.

From epidurals and medical interventions to maternal mortality and grief after birth trauma, this conversation is equal parts practical, emotional, hilarious, and deeply validating.

In This Episode, We Explore:

The difference between “birth plans” and “birth vibes”

How flexibility and adaptability change the birth experience

Why the “perfect birth story” is mostly a myth

The truth about epidurals, pain medication, and mom guilt

How to advocate for yourself when you feel unheard or dismissed

Why women of color face higher risks in maternal healthcare

How support people can actually be supportive during labor

The importance of feeling respected and emotionally safe during birth

What closure and healing can look like after a traumatic birth experience

Why giving yourself grace matters more than getting everything “right”

A reminder that birth, motherhood, and life rarely go according to plan. Empowerment isn’t about perfection or control — it’s about trusting yourself, adapting when things change, and giving yourself grace when things get messy. 

Thank you to our sponsors!

Become a Fora Advisor today at Foratravel.com/WOMAN - and make sure to tell them we sent you!

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Connect with Jen:

Book: https://www.jenhamilton.co/birthvibes 

Website: www.jenhamilton.co 

IG: https://www.instagram.com/_jen_hamilton_/?hl=en 

FB: https://www.facebook.com/jenhamiltonfacebook/ 

Substack: https://jenhamiltonsub.substack.com/ 

Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/c/jenhamilton 

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One of the most loaded, misunderstood, fear-filled topics women face is fertility. Because apparently we’ve all been sold two completely conflicting messages at the exact same time:

“You have plenty of time.” AND “Your eggs are basically turning to dust after 35.”

Super helpful.

In this episode, Nicole sits down with Dr. Lucky Sekhon — double board-certified reproductive endocrinologist, fertility specialist, and author of The Lucky Egg — to separate actual science from internet nonsense, fearmongering, and wellness-industry garbage.

This conversation is honest, nuanced, and deeply needed. Because fertility is not a morality test, a personal failure, or something you can hack with enough supplements and a promo code.

In This Episode, We Explore:

The biggest fertility myths women are still being told

Why fertility is not a “cliff” — and what actually happens with age

The truth about egg quality, IVF, and “advanced maternal age”

Why so many women feel blindsided when trying to get pregnant

The dangerous rise of fertility misinformation on social media

What actually matters for fertility health (and what absolutely doesn’t)

The role of insulin resistance, sleep, exercise, and nutrition in fertility

Which supplements may help — and which are mostly expensive hope

Why infertility is NOT just a woman’s issue

The male fertility conversation we should’ve been having all along

How to advocate for yourself without spiraling into fear

Because you deserve facts, options, and support — not shame, blame, or another influencer trying to sell you something.

Thank you to our sponsors!

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Connect with Dr. Lucky:

Book: The Lucky Egg: https://static.macmillan.com/static/smp/lucky-egg-9781250408716/   

Website: https://theluckyegg.com/about-me/ 

IG: https://www.instagram.com/lucky.sekhon/ 

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@drluckyegg 

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Let’s cut the crap: this isn’t just about screen time. It’s about attention—yours, your kids’, and who (or what) is stealing it.

In this brutally honest (and slightly uncomfortable) conversation, Nicole sits down with Catherine Price—award-winning journalist, author of How to Break Up with Your Phone, and co-author of The Amazing Generation—to unpack what screens are actually doing to our brains, our kids, and our relationships.

We’re talking about:

Why “screen time” is the wrong conversation—and what you should be focusing on instead

How constant scrolling is literally rewiring attention spans (for you and your kids)

The real cost of distraction: missed memories, weaker relationships, and a life half-lived

Why your kids don’t need another app—they need your actual presence

The difference between useful tech and attention-sucking garbage

How to delay smartphones and social media without turning your house into a war zone

What kids really notice about your phone habits (hint: everything)

Practical ways to reset boundaries—even if you feel like you’ve already screwed it up

This episode isn’t about perfection. It’s about awareness, intention, and making better choices—starting now.

Because every time you pick up your phone, you’re choosing what (and who) gets your attention.

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Families are better when they’re working together… go to myskylight.com/WOMANSWORK for $30 off your Skylight Calendar.

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Connect with Catherine:

Substack: https://substack.com/@catherineprice 

Website: https://catherineprice.com/ 

Book: The Amazing Generation, co-authored with Jonathan Haidt. https://www.amazon.com/Amazing-Generation-Guide-Freedom-Screen-Filled/dp/B0F87C5F9G  

Book: How to Break Up With Your Phone https://www.amazon.com/How-Break-Up-Your-Phone/dp/039958112X  

IG: https://www.instagram.com/catherinepriceofficial/ 

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@catherinepriceofficial 

LI: http://linkedin.com/in/catherinepriceofficial 

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Let’s get one thing straight: this isn’t another “just drink less” conversation. Because if it were that simple, you would’ve solved it already.

In this raw, honest, and slightly uncomfortable episode, Nicole sits down with intuitive drinking coach Colleen Freeland—host of the It’s Not About the Alcohol podcast and a former high-functioning overdrinker herself—to unpack what’s really behind overdrinking, especially for high-achieving women who “have it all together”… on paper. 

It’s not about willpower. It’s not about discipline. And it’s definitely not just about alcohol.

It’s about what you’re trying to escape.

Colleen breaks down why alcohol is often just the symptom—not the problem—and how coping mechanisms like perfectionism, overworking, and even “healthy habits” can be just as numbing if we don’t address the root cause.

Why alcohol isn’t the problem—it’s the signal

The real reason high-achieving women overdrink (hint: it’s not lack of discipline)

Why removing alcohol doesn’t fix the issue—it just replaces it

Nervous system regulation: the skill no one taught you (but you desperately need)

How to rebuild self-trust after patterns you’re not proud of

Why feeling better starts with admitting you don’t feel okay

This conversation flips the script on everything we’ve been taught about drinking, self-control, and “fixing” ourselves.

Because the goal may not be to eliminate the coping mechanism… maybe the goal is to build a life you don’t constantly need to escape from.

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Families are better when they’re working together… go to myskylight.com/WOMANSWORK for $30 off your Skylight Calendar.

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Connect with Colleen:

Website: https://www.emotionalsobrietycoaching.com/ 

IG: https://www.instagram.com/thehangoverwhisperer/

Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@hangoverwhisperer 

Podcast: https://www.emotionalsobrietycoaching.com/podcast 

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This episode breaks down why overdrinking isn’t about alcohol—it’s about emotional regulation, stress, and self-connection, giving high-achieving women a smarter, deeper way to change their habits for good. 

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