Flying Free

Three False Beliefs My Abusive Relationship Gave to Me [143]


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Imagine carrying around a backpack full of books from high school.

You aren’t taking those classes anymore, but you always carry the weight anyway.

It digs into your shoulders. It makes you tired. Slows you down. Doesn’t let you truly rest. It keeps others from getting close. 

Abuse is like that. It teaches us a lot—lessons no one should ever learn. And lessons we don’t even realize we’re still living out. 

So we may escape abusive relationships, but we’re stuck in limbo, carrying the textbooks we think hold the truth about life, love, and ourselves. 

Rebecca realized this. She was living out sneaky, destructive beliefs even after her divorce—in her career, her parenting, and in her new marriage. 

If you want to be truly free from your past, you’ll love the new lessons this episode has to offer:

  • FALSE: Boundaries only matter in unhealthy relationships
  • TRUE: Setting boundaries is a critical part of every healthy relationship (and why she avoided doing this in her new marriage for years)
  • FALSE: Everything in a new relationship with a safe, good person will be like a Hallmark movie
  • TRUE: There will still be difficulty, discomfort, and disagreements (but they won’t become atomic bombs)
  • FALSE: Your career and parenting and mental health will be magically perfect and easy after you escape from your abusive marriage
  • TRUE: Recovery is an 18-course banquet, not a drive-thru snack, and you’ll still live on Earth (but these don’t have to be major downers)

Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here

If you are a Christian woman who thinks you may be in an emotionally destructive marriage, learn more at https://flyingfreenow.com

I'll send you (free!) the first chapter of my book, Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage, which has an assessment to help you figure out if your relationship is abusive or not. All you have to do is hop on my mailing list. 

You can also find out about our online education and support program for women of faith at https://joinflyingfree.com

And finally, if you are a divorced Christian woman who wants to take back her life and get healthy, lose weight, have amazing relationships, get things done, build a business or career, and even find a good man (if you want one) - check out Flying Higher.

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Flying FreeBy Natalie Hoffman

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