In this episode, hosts Zack, Josie, and Brad sit down with Ferdinand the bull, to explore the real, often-unspoken complexities of being a single male navigating ENM spaces. Ferdinand shares how he first entered the lifestyle at the encouragement of his then-wife, who never chose to participate herself. Now eight years, a divorce, and countless connections later, he finds himself at a crossroads: dating in the vanilla world while weighing whether he can—or should—remain in the lifestyle community he’s grown so deeply attached to.

The hosts dig into the nuanced decisions single men face, including when to disclose lifestyle involvement to vanilla partners, and the unique blend of freedom, connection, and emotional intelligence that strong bulls cultivate. Ferdinand opens up about both the highs and the lows: the excitement of partnered experiences, the intimacy he builds with couples, and the loneliness being a bull can create.

Together, they unpack the dynamics between bulls and couples, the financial realities of being a single male in lifestyle spaces, and the stereotypes that make forming genuine connections harder than most people realize. Ferdinand also offers grounded, experience-based advice for single men curious about entering the lifestyle—highlighting why assertiveness paired with respect is essential, and why aggression never works.

This episode offers an honest look at what single men gain from the lifestyle that traditional dating can’t provide, and what it truly costs, emotionally and financially, to walk this path.

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(00:00:00) Good luck Chuck

(00:02:00) How I found the lifestyle

(00:04:46) Friends with benefits

(00:06:09) Being a bull in the lifestyle can be lonely

(00:07:45) Evolving in the lifestyle over the last 8 years

(00:08:50) Navigating the LS can be difficult and rejection is common

(00:09:36) I shared my sexual experiences with my wife

(00:10:17) Dating vanillas while you’re in the lifestyle

(00:13:03) Benefits and drawbacks of being a bull

(00:14:24) Bringing a new partner into the lifestyle

(00:16:25) Favorite lifestyle events or activities

(00:19:01) Advice for single males entering the lifestyle

(00:22:33) The bull / couple dynamics

(00:24:41) Lifestyle scenarios

(00:29:39) Assumptions people make about bulls

(00:33:07) What singles get out of the lifestyle

(00:34:18) Addressing sexual orientation

(00:36:05) I’m a good first experience for couples

(00:37:02) Catching feelings

(00:38:10) Being a bull is expensive

(00:39:01) How they begin and how I conduct myself in play sessions

(00:40:01) Communication and emotional intelligence

(00:43:59) A good learning experience

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In this week’s episode, hosts Zack, Josie, Brad, and Brittany dive into one of the most universally frustrating parts of the lifestyle: communication… or the lack of it. From last-minute confirmations that never come to couples who keep others dangling “just in case,” the crew unpacks the subtle (and not-so-subtle) ways poor communication can waste time, strain friendships, and complicate connections.

They explore why it feels so disrespectful when couples make plans but go silent when it’s time to confirm, and how annoying it is when someone breaks a commitment and then disappears—only to ask you to suggest a new time and never respond. The hosts also share their collective experience with a notoriously flaky couple whose repeated excuses have become a running theme in their local community.

The conversation moves into whether people owe each other explanations when interest fades, or whether being honest only invites unnecessary drama. They also examine the sting of being ghosted by close friends, and the gray area where “ghosting” isn’t so clear—especially in a dynamic with multiple people, mismatched levels of interest, or partners who aren’t on the same page.

Ultimately, the group acknowledges what everyone secretly knows: the lifestyle is awkward, interest is complicated, and communication between couples is hard. But understanding how these behaviors affect others—and recognizing the subjectivity of what counts as ghosting—can make navigating it all just a little easier.

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(00:00:00) The sizzle fizzle

(00:02:23) The times when we’ve flaked or ghosted

(00:04:02) Communication is great….then crickets!

(00:05:55) Ranting about coordinating with people who are traveling

(00:14:00) Speculating on why people may flake or ghost

(00:16:34) Letting people know you’re not interested so they don’t wonder

(00:17:42) A local couple with a reputation for expressing interest and not following through

(00:22:24) The local lifestyle scene

(00:26:38) Another rant about a gh  osting scenario

(00:29:12) Being honest about your true interest

(00:31:00) Texting etiquette

(00:34:26) When too much time passes between responses

(00:38:00) Challenges in identifying and connecting with couples online

(00:40:25) How honest should you be when breaking plans?

(00:43:18) When friends ghost you

(00:48:28) Ghosting is subjective and may not always be a bad thing

(00:51:58) Be kind, honest, direct, respectful and don’t string people along

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This week, Zack, Josie, and Brad sit down with Callie — a Physician Assistant who works in the ER and has seen it all — to talk about one of the most important topics in the swinger lifestyle: sexual health.

Callie breaks down what everyone in the lifestyle should know about STI prevention, testing, and risk management. She explains how your risk isn’t just about your behavior, but also the behavior of your partners — and why trust, responsibility, and regular testing are essential for keeping everyone safe.

From women’s vaginal health and condom sensitivity to UTI prevention and the realities of unprotected oral sex, the conversation covers the practical side of pleasure. Callie also sheds light on HPV, how the vaccine has evolved, and how to approach testing — whether you test with your partner or alternate schedules.

Throughout the episode, the Crew explores how understanding your own risk tolerance, staying informed, and choosing responsible play partners can make all the difference. Because in the lifestyle, good sexual health isn’t just about protection — it’s about connection, communication, and confidence.

JOIN US in 2026 on the Bliss Cruise in February or at Naughty Nawlins and support our podcast by booking your ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠travel⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or purchasing your lifestyle products using our affiliate links. Please do us a favor and visit

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(00:00:00) Callie is a PA and has 10 years of ER experience

(00:02:51) Fantasies - the gateway drug

(00:04:00) Condom use is a personal choice but there are risks

(00:06:49) This information is only an opinion and is not medical advice

(00:07:30) Anal tissue is more easily broken down so risk of STI is higher with anal sex

(00:08:29) Condoms and vaginal health

(00:10:00) More facts about vaginas

(00:11:11) Post menopausal vaginal decline, treatment and UTI prevention

(00:13:40) Condom use can be frustrating for men

(00:15:11) Oral sex and STI risks

(00:16:35) Deep dive on HPV

(00:19:39) The risks associated with oral vs vaginal sex are less severe

(00:20:26) Difference between STI ‘ and STD’s

(00:21:06) STI testing frequency and most common STI’s

(00:23:05) Throat and anal swabs by request only

(00:23:54) Most STI’s are asymptomatic so you have to test regularly

(00:25:11) STI testing funnies

(00:27:42) Testing frequency and alternating testing with your partner

(00:30:00) The partners you choose may influence testing frequency

(00:30:43) Sharing or asking for most recent test results

(00:34:50) You should be testing for these STI’s

(00:37:37) PREP

(00:39:30) Doxy PEP

(00:41:35) Prevention - condoms, regular testing, partners and substances

(00:43:00) Drugs, alcohol and high risk activities

(00:45:00) Gauging risk has a lot to do with the people and your intuition

(00:46:48) Trimix

(00:48:00) Stranger things…ER edition

(00:50:46) Preventative vaccines and screenings Callie recommends

(00:51:32) STI treatment app from CDC very helpful

(00:52:02) USPSTF - United States Preventative Services Task Force

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RESOURCES

STI Treatment App from CDC

USPSTF
Health care considerations for sex workers

Chlamydia and gonorrhea (Basics)

Genital herpes (Basics)

Sexually transmitted infections (Basics)
Sexually transmitted infection screening recommendations by sex assigned at birth and population

The five Ps: Partners, prevention of pregnancy, protection from STIs, practices, and past history of STIs
Why men who have sex with men have an increased risk of STIs

This week, the Two Plus Two Crew tackles a playful term with some serious depth — premature evacuation. No, not that kind — we’re talking about those moments when play ends earlier than planned and all the emotions that can come with it.

Zack, Josie, Brad, and Brittany open up about the messy, human side of swinging — from people-pleasing and communication breakdowns to triggers and shame. Josie shares a few personal experiences that highlight how past trauma can resurface in unexpected ways, and the group talks candidly about how to give ourselves and our partners grace when those moments happen.

They dig into the importance of being honest with ourselves, clear with our partners, and compassionate with our playmates — because no one can read our minds, no matter how in sync we think we are. The Crew also shares tips for better communication and staying connected even when things don’t go as planned.

Of course, there are still plenty of laughs — at each other’s expense and their own — as they explore how the lifestyle continues to challenge, teach, and strengthen their relationships.

JOIN US in 2026 on the Bliss Cruise in February or at Naughty Nawlins and support our podcast by booking your ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠travel⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or purchasing your lifestyle products using our affiliate links. Please do us a favor and visit

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(00:00:00) What is premature evacuation?

(00:02:09) A traumatic play experience

(00:08:09) Nobody was doing anything wrong

(00:10:24) Feeling shame for not self-advocating

(00:19:24) Brad learns he has the perfect cock for anal

(00:21:07) Other people aren’t aware of our triggers

(00:23:26) There was no malicious intent

(00:26:11) Listeners who become play partners

(00:26:48) We don’t know what we don’t know

(00:28:56) Evolving in the lifestyle

(00:29:49) Some people will try to push your boundaries

(00:34:39) Are we being instinctual or over critical?

(00:37:39) Assessing potential play partners to ensure a positive experience

(00:39:45) Positive or negative bias will impact your choices and decisions

(00:43:44) Considering changing our approach to serve us better

(00:46:37) Looking at your results and deciding whether you want to make changes

(00:48:55) Comparing your own results with others you see in the lifestyle

(00:50:22) Assessing our own risk tolerance

(00:53:13) Making comparisons in the lifestyle

(00:55:13) Getting out of your head and letting go

(00:56:30) Holding one another back

(01:00:16) Parting advice

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This week, Zack, Josie, and Brad welcome Mary — a licensed professional counselor with 13 years in the lifestyle alongside her husband. With a rare mix of professional insight and personal experience, Mary opens up about emotional awareness, connection, and the importance of taking care of yourself — and your relationship — while living the lifestyle.

Mary shares her perspective on knowing when it might be time to step back and refocus on your partnership, and how the lifestyle can magnify both the challenges and the strengths within a relationship. Drawing from her trauma specialization, she discusses the four types of trauma, how they can quietly shape our lifestyle experiences, and why vulnerability and shame often show up where we least expect them.

The conversation shines a light on the feelings many swingers experience but struggle to name — and offers a fresh, compassionate perspective on what it really means to grow together through honesty, self-awareness, and trust.

As Mary put it best: there are many different kinds of therapy… and sometimes, the lifestyle can be one of them.

JOIN US in 2026 on the Bliss Cruise in February or at Naughty Nawlins and support our podcast by booking your ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠travel⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or purchasing your lifestyle products using our affiliate links. Please do us a favor and visit

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(00:00:00) Mary has a different perspective as a trauma therapist who’s also in the lifestyle

(00:02:44) Coming from a place of love or fear

(00:04:21) Everyone is in the lifestyle they just don’t know it

(00:05:28) Stumbling upon the lifestyle

(00:07:25) Choosing to explore and grow instead of running in fear

(00:10:37) My husband and I have 13 years of lifestyle experience

(00:13:03) The impact trauma has on our lives and lifestyle journeys

(00:15:35) Four types of trauma: betrayal, abandonment, rejection, and shame

(00:17:00) Information overload and the direction society is moving in

(00:21:05) Men and women think differently

(00:24:11) Personality differences impact experiences, too

(00:27:22) Is energy the same as attunement

(00:30:30) The lifestyle will magnify any problems you have in your relationship

(00:33:24) The biggest trauma trigger in the lifestyle is shame

(00:35:49) Daily walks, communication and thought experiments

(00:38:43) Tips to help couples better communicate

(00:40:15) Self-advocacy and learning to speak up for yourself

(00:41:47) How to know if you’re having ‘too much’ lifestyle

(00:44:23) What to do when you feel triggered in a play session

(00:48:34) Tips on taking care of yourselves and your relationship

(00:49:43) When to seek counseling and how to find a good therapist

(00:53:35) Nuggets of wisdom from Mary

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⁠

Resources

Lewis Howes’ Interview with Esther Perel

Brene Brown’s Ted Talk on Shame - YouTube 2012

Dr. Brian Pennie’s interview with Dr. Gabor Mate, an expert on Trauma and Addiction

BARS Acronym

• 
  
• Betrayal
• 
  
• Abandonment
• 
  
• Rejection
• 
  
• Shame

This week, the Two Plus Two Crew gets real about one of the lifestyle’s biggest questions — can swinging actually make your relationship stronger?

Zack and Josie open up about what it was like being in the lifestyle during their previous marriages — how they got into it, where things went wrong, and what they’ve learned since. They share how, through their evolution in the lifestyle together, their marriage has grown through honesty, vulnerability, and countless deep conversations about what truly matters.

Brad and Brittany bring their own experiences to the table, sharing insecurities and insights that couples everywhere can relate to. Together, the crew explores how men and women often see the lifestyle through different lenses — and how those differences can either pull you apart or bring you closer.

From trust and transparency to authenticity and acceptance, they reveal how the lifestyle can strengthen your bond — if you’re willing to put in the work (and maybe bare a little more than just your bodies).

Because when you can show up fully as yourself — love yourself — and be loved for it, that’s when your relationship truly comes alive.

JOIN US in 2026 on the Bliss Cruise in February or at Naughty Nawlins and support our podcast by booking your ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠travel⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or purchasing your lifestyle products using our affiliate links. Please do us a favor and visit

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(00:00:00) Lifestyle 1.0 didn’t go so well

(00:03:08) Josie was pressured into getting into the lifestyle

(00:05:33) Zack and his wife at the time were both in agreement to try it

(00:09:39) Brad’s first brush with the lifestyle

(00:11:02) We found other swingers on Craigslist

(00:12:41) We weren’t in supportive marriages

(00:14:26) The intimacy wasn’t like it is for us now

(00:15:48) I feel more drawn to Josie than I am to you

(00:18:23) Keeping things from going down a wrong path

(00:20:14) We feared the lifestyle for a long time

(00:22:32) Lifestyle 2.0 is much better

(00:25:50) We know what it feels like to catch feelings

(00:27:41) Trust and open communication helps your relationship grow

(00:28:27) Friends with benefits vs one and done

(00:30:14) Strong couples make playing more comfortable for the girls

(00:33:56) How the lifestyle benefits your relationship

(00:36:04) Men’s brains and women’s brains are very different

(00:40:50) Revealing all of yourself to your partner

(00:42:57) Lifestyle related arguments help you dig deep

(00:45:11) Your partner helps give you confidence to be yourself

(00:47:17) Supporting your partner

(00:49:18) Trust is small promises kept repeatedly over time

(00:54:02) We’re able to work through things faster now

(00:55:39) If you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re right

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Reddit Post worth reading

This week, the Two Plus Two Crew is back together, and things are getting deliciously crowded. Brad and Brittany are fully in their element, fresh from a steamy mountain takeover weekend with 16 lifestyle friends and plenty of spicy stories to share. Meanwhile, Zack and Josie open up about a night they didn’t see coming: their first threesome and a group play twist that left their hearts racing and pulses quickening.

From Brittany’s shibari fantasy coming to life to the electric thrill of meeting new play partners and feeling that spark catch fire, this episode dives deep into the sexy, messy, and unforgettable moments that make group play so intoxicating.

Consider this your invitation to the after-dark gathering where communication, connection, and curiosity collide. One taste… and you may not want to leave. 

JOIN US in 2026 on the Bliss Cruise in February or at Naughty Nawlins and support our podcast by booking your ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠travel⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or purchasing your lifestyle products using our affiliate links. Please do us a favor and visit

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(00:00:00) Welcome back to the studio, Brad & Brittany!

(00:02:24) Group play is our jam

(00:03:06) Group play challenges and nerves

(00:06:31) 18 people in one house for three days

(00:09:16) Conveying interest when and how

(00:11:50) It was my turn to be tied up

(00:15:05) Envy and communicating interest to your partner

(00:18:52) Initiating group play

(00:22:31) We turned into exhibitionists

(00:24:19) Our first ‘threesome’ 

(00:27:24) It was unexpected, new and exciting

(00:30:07) And now there were five

(00:33:47) Getting consent during play…verbal vs visual

(00:37:15) Group play in place of a four way connection

(00:38:08) Communication with your partner is key

(00:40:52) ‘Same’ party, different outcome…we were intentional

(00:43:29) Challenges with communicating interest to your partner

(00:44:39) Putting the right group of people together for play

(00:48:04) Taking time to reflect on play experiences and recuperate

(00:51:08) Some group play experiences get your motor running

(00:52:00) Parties coming up

(00:53:34) Taking care of your relationship is most important

(00:54:31) Looking forward to our next group play experience

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This week, the vampires turn down the lights and turn up the honesty. Zack and Josie welcome Stone and Selene, a couple who first stepped into the lifestyle so Selene could explore her attraction to women. What began as a soft spark of curiosity evolved into a full swap journey—complete with steamy firsts, emotional growth, and plenty of delicious self-discovery.

Stone opens up about his own inner work—navigating the envy and insecurity that came with watching Selene experience pleasure with another man. Their story isn’t about drama or broken trust; it’s about personal reflection, emotional courage, and a deeply supportive partnership. With Selene by his side, Stone learned how shifting beliefs can unlock new levels of connection and play.

From FF encounters to unforgettable threesomes (and that oh-so-important “who’s in the middle?” moment), this episode is a reminder that real growth can be just as sexy as the play itself.

JOIN US in 2026 on the Bliss Cruise in February or at Naughty Nawlins and support our podcast by booking your ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠travel⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or purchasing your lifestyle products using our affiliate links. Please do us a favor and visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://twoplustwopodcast.com/resources/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

(00:00:00) Selene finally shared with Stone that she wanted to explore women

(00:04:11) Stone supported Selene in FF but didn’t think it included him

(00:05:57) Selene’s first FF experience

(00:09:02) Their first threesome

(00:12:17) With threesomes the question is who’s in the middle?

(00:14:08) Their favorite threesome position…it’ll make you hot!

(00:17:27) Bliss was their first lifestyle experience

(00:20:18) Selene’s mindset shift changed her experience

(00:23:14) Being a little naughty was her favorite thing

(00:25:20) The first time she had sex with a man other than Stone

(00:28:24) Selene had to work through her feelings

(00:31:18) A supportive spouse makes a huge difference

(00:34:02) He was handsome and he fucked her brains out

(00:36:28) It was fun but it was difficult to work through the feelings

(00:39:06) Stone had to stop the play session and that can be hard

(00:40:54) He had to go to work on himself

(00:42:50) He felt insecure and had a lot of feelings to work through

(00:44:19) Reframing experiences and changing core beliefs

(00:46:08) Selene was heartbroken watching Stone struggle

(00:48:28) Brad and Brittany helped them turn a corner in couples play

(00:50:44) Judgment around number of play partners

(00:53:14) Reconnection sex is the hottest sex

(00:54:39) These are normal feelings

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This week, Zack, Josie, Brad, and Brittany dive into the little turn-offs that can make a big difference in the lifestyle. From endless talkers who don’t know when to zip it, to naughty pics that miss the mark, to distracted dates and space-invading flirts, the hosts share their own pet peeves while weighing in on those shared by listeners. Playful, cheeky, and just a touch wicked, this episode proves that sometimes the sexiest sparks come from knowing what not to do.

JOIN US in 2026 on the Bliss Cruise in February or at Naughty Nawlins and support our podcast by booking your ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠travel⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or purchasing your lifestyle products using our affiliate links. Please do us a favor and visit

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(00:00:00) We asked our listeners

(00:01:53) People who dominate the conversation

(00:07:10) Good listeners may be more responsive in play sessions

(00:08:21) Dick pics

(00:11:50 ) It’s a numbers game

(00:12:48) Naked Man - flashback to Episode 9 at 00:32:00

(00:15:47) Pussy pics

(00:16:15) Pics the ladies find sexy

(00:18:04) Ignoring DM’s, ghosting and communication etiquette

(00:23:39) Distracted dates

(00:25:54) Cock shock collars and pocket pussies

(00:26:19) Halitosis and smoking

(00:31:38) Interrupting closed conversations

(00:36:06) Lifestyle culture

(00:38:36) Posers

(00:39:30) Personal space

(00:40:43) Being too handsy or overly friendly

(00:43:12) Women may view interactions differently than men

(00:48:50) Difficulty talking about having sex with potential partners 

(00:52:14) Talking yourself out of a play session when you know too much

(00:55:02) Future podcast topic…join the conversation on Peaches’nCream

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This week, the vampires sink their teeth into something a little different. Zack and Josie cozy up with their irresistible friends Luke and Rickie—an erotica author with a wicked imagination and her equally adventurous partner—whom they first met under the sultry moonlight of Desire Riviera Maya. Together, they peel back the velvet curtain on their journey into the lifestyle, from sizzling first encounters to the thrills (and giggles) of bi-comfortable play.

No topic is off-limits as the conversation winds through pegging, prostate pleasure, DVP, and the deliciously complicated dance of desire when all four partners are fully in sync. Along the way, Luke and Rickie bare the truth about bisexuality, breaking down the double standards that paint men and women so differently, and revealing just how freeing it can be to embrace the unexpected.

Whether you’re curious about crossing boundaries or just love eavesdropping on sexy, candid stories, this episode offers both a bite of wisdom and a taste of naughtiness. Even if you’re not looking to go bi, you’ll find yourself enthralled—and maybe just a little tempted.

JOIN US in 2026 on the Bliss Cruise in February or at Naughty Nawlins and support our podcast by booking your ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠travel⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or purchasing your lifestyle products using our affiliate links. Please do us a favor and visit

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(00:00:00) Introducing our guests, Luke and Rickie

(00:02:32) Erotica…a gateway to the lifestyle

(00:05:28) It all started with Vegas

(00:07:59) We were like scared children experiencing our first house party

(00:09:18) We went all in

(00:10:48) I’m a heterosexual man but enjoy the pleasure of another man

(00:14:07) The complexity and hypocrisy of bi men vs women

(00:17:56) How the bisexual conversation started

(00:20:07) I don’t want you to see me as less of a man

(00:22:47) The evolution of lifestyle desires

(00:26:32) Changing our beliefs is an evolution

(00:28:42) The MM fantasy is on women’s minds

(00:30:04) It’s only enjoyable for me if you also find it enjoyable

(00:32:57) Strap-ons, prostate orgasms and stigmas

(00:36:09) She has the hormones of a teenaged boy

(00:37:31) Helping inexperienced couples explore bisexuality

(00:40:05) Removing barriers to foursome play

(00:44:03) DVP took my orgasm to a level 10

(00:48:43) Fun foursomes; condoms and bisexual play

(00:52:41) Orgasms and controlling squirting 

(00:56:18) Putting less significance on the orgasm can make it easier to orgasm

We'd love to connect with you!

Create your own FREE account on Peaches'nCream, the new social media app for your lifestyle!

Available on the App Store and on Google Play.

INVITE CODE: 2plus2

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://peachesncream.app/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Join the Two Plus Two Podcast Group on Peaches'nCream to see our exclusive photos, post your comments, ask questions and connect with your Two Plus Two Crew: Zack, Josie, Brad & Brittany.

Email us your thoughts, comments and ideas at:

⁠⁠[email protected]

Want to read Rickie's steamy books?

About the author

She referred to two books specifically in this episode. They are:

Perfect for Me and Stay for Me