Many of the people finding success in the alcoholism recovery community embrace some form of assigning the blame to the alcohol. And yet, so many people who are trying to recover, both the alcoholics and the loved ones, struggle with this concept. On this episode, Sheri and Matt break it down and try to identify the obstacles that keep people stuck: accountability, envy, fear and anger.

Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected].

If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

If you are the spouse of an alcoholic, you deserve sobriety. But even once your relationship enters sobriety, you deserve more. You deserve a partner who carries his own weight, and is tough enough to hear the hard stuff. It is not enough to expect what you deserve. You have to be strong enough to demand it.

Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected].

If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Sheri and Matt break trust down into three components: safety, intimacy and honesty. Trust is the last thing to come back in a marriage that has suffered through alcoholism, and understanding how to work on this tripod of relationship recovery is critical. Don’t underestimate how much harder repair is versus starting over fresh. Also, Matt shows how old he is by sharing lots of stupid sayings that need generational translation (while Sheri rolls her eyes).

Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected].

If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

The threat of relapse after an inpatient rehab is real, but the threat is coming from more directions than we might understand. Sheri and Matt talk about threats posed by loss of identity, a lack of emotional expression, and the trading of self-care for stress. Be cautious when those 30 days are up. No matter what the calendar or the insurance company says, growth and discovery are never over. Unless, of course, you aren’t opposed to relapse.

Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected].

If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

As a drinker, alcohol was an major component of Matt’s identity. And alcohol also influenced how he had fun. Phrases like, “Work hard, play hard,” and, “You’ll get all the sleep you need when you’re dead,” were Matt’s mantras. So when alcohol is foundational to your identity, and play-hard partying is an emotional motivator, how the hell do you know who you are or how to have fun in sobriety? Sheri and Matt have some laughs, and a few tears, tackling this question.

Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected].

If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Did the definitive statement of this episode title get your attention? We know there are strong emotions when it comes to sex and intimacy in relationships impacted by alcoholism, and Sheri and Matt continue to try to navigate their own experiences, stirred together with what they are learning both formally and informally. Matt reveals the identity of his intimacy hero, and Sheri starts the episode with a bold statement about why healthy intimacy is important to her. If you are waiting to tackle sex and intimacy when things get better in your relationship, you might want to give this one a listen. Hint: You might be stuck waiting forever.

Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected].

If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Get ready to get your nutrition, exercise and healthy habits on with Graham Hawley – certified health and wellness coach, Matt’s soccer buddy and the inspiration behind Sheri’s and Matt’s plan for resentment processing (if you are sick if hearing the couple talk about weekly meetings, this is the guy you can blame). Follow Graham’s excellent videos and other resources @simplyhealthconscious on Instagram or on the web. Now let’s get rolling with some healthy habits and some accountability, and let’s avoid those lifestyle diseases (like alcoholism).

Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected].

What happens when the person you trust and most rely on for mutual protection becomes the most dangerous person in your life? Does this sound like a setup for Matt to exaggerate? Hear Sheri’s emotion, and decide for yourself. See if you can listen, and still downplay the impact.

Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected].

If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Warning – Discussion includes talk of self harm.

Living with alcoholism means trying to keep the truth a secret. But as alcoholism progresses, the truth seeps out. Sheri and Matt are joined by Mindy and Deb who have both lived with and loved alcoholics, and share traumatic stories of truth.

Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question. Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected].

If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Sheri and Matt react to Amber Hollingsworth’s advice from Ep181 about how the spouse of an alcoholic can respond to the behavior of the person suffering from addiction. Their discussion about their real-life experience demonstrates how challenging these relationships are to navigate, and how unprepared we all are for the impact of alcohol on our lives.

Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question. Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected].

If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.