We Can Do Hard Things

In this unplanned conversation, Amanda speaks up for everyone who’s been labeled a “Control Freak” – anyone who feels like they have to hold up the entire sky for their families or businesses – when what they really want is to feel supported and safe. Amanda shares vulnerably about: how she became an overfunctioner, the blessings and curses of being one, and the practical strategies she’s using to let go – and what her partner is doing to make her feel like she can finally try to relax.  

If this episode resonates, go back and listen to OVERWHELM: Is our exhaustion a sign that we’re CareTicking time bombs? 

354. How to Make Loving Corrections with adrienne maree brown

adrienne marie brown returns to discuss how to make loving corrections with the people in your life. 

Discover: 

-The three essential human needs—and what happens when we don’t get them

-How to break free from the need to be “good” and find something better

-What defines a loving correction (and what doesn’t)

-Why acting as a protector for others reveals deep truths about your own healing journey

On the guest: adrienne maree brown grows healing ideas in public through writing, music, and podcasts, nurturing Emergent Strategy, Pleasure Activism, Radical Imagination and Transformative Justice. adrienne’s work is informed by 25 years of social and environmental justice facilitation primarily supporting Black liberation. adrienne is the author/editor of Emergent Strategy: Shaping Change, Changing Worlds; Pleasure Activism: The Politics of Feeling Good; Grievers; and Maroons.

adrienne’s latest book Loving Corrections is available now.

353. How We’ll Save Abortion: A Must-Listen with Jessica Valenti

Amanda, Glennon and Abby sit down with award-winning writer and activist Jessica Valenti to discuss the state of abortion rights in the United States. 

Discover: 

-The staggering statistic revealing overwhelming public support for abortion in America

-Why the anti-choice movement is desperate to keep abortion off the ballot

-Why abortion is a litmus test for the future of democracy in America

-The exodus of doctors from anti-choice states and the rise in maternal mortality rates. 

More on Jessica:  Jessica Valenti is an award-winning author and activist. She’s the author of seven books, including the New York Times bestseller Sex Object: A Memoir. Her groundbreaking anthology, Yes Means Yes: Visions of Female Sexual Power and a World Without Rape, paved the way for legislation of the same name, setting what’s now considered the gold standard for sexual consent. Jessica has also been credited with sparking feminism’s online wave by founding the trailblazing blog Feministing. She’s been a columnist for The Guardian and The Nation, and her writing has been published everywhere from The New York Times and The Atlantic to Bitch magazine and The Toast. After the demise of Roe, Jessica founded Abortion, Every Day, an urgent synthesis of anything and everything happening with abortion rights in the United States. She lives in Brooklyn with her husband and daughter.

More about Jessica’s Work: 

-https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/772254/abortion-by-jessica-valenti/

-https://jessica.substack.com/

1. Jen describes the shock of losing her 26-year marriage overnight. 

2. How, looking back, Jen sees that she knew something was wrong in her relationship well before she “knew” something was wrong – and the moment she reached out to Glennon to share it for the first time.  

3. Why Jen’s friends told her she was a “human spotlight” and “cleanup crew” in her marriage – and the pain of realizing she was powerful in every role other than wife.  

4. How Jen convinced herself that her marriage was enough when in reality she felt like a pot of water slowly building to a boil. 

5. The common hell of being lonely inside of marriage – and why we won’t be fully honest with ourselves, our partners, or our friends about what we are most afraid of.  

About Jen: 

Jen Hatmaker is the New York Times bestselling author of For the Love and Fierce, Free, and Full of Fire, along with twelve other books. She hosts the award-winning For the Love podcast, is the delighted curator of the Jen Hatmaker Book Club, and leader of a tightly knit online community where she reaches millions of people each week. Jen is a co-founder of Legacy Collective, a giving organization that grants millions of dollars toward sustainable projects around the world. She is a mom to five kids and lives happily just outside Austin, Texas.

To learn more about Jen, visit www.jenhatmaker.com.

TW: @JenHatmaker

IG: @jenhatmaker

352. Which Day of the Week Are You?

Abby, Glennon and Amanda discuss what day of the week they each are, why we do things we don’t want to do, and how to stop giving unsolicited advice.

Discover:

-Why we should celebrate divorce and endings more;

-Unsolicited advice and what to do if you find yourself giving it;

-Why you might be engaging in trauma reenactment; and 

-What’s happening when you feel the Sunday Scaries.

351. How to Have *Healthy* Conflict with Amanda Ripley 

Conflict expert and investigative journalist, Amanda Ripley, is back to give us a conflict resolution 101 guide and delve into some real-life examples from Abby and Glennon’s relationship. 

Discover: 

-The best way to diffuse a high-conflict person from going further;

-The binary thinking that makes fighting with a spouse feel so painful–plus, the antidote;

-How to disagree while still holding someone else’s perspective; and

-Why it’s important to know your shame responses in order to have better conflicts.

For the first part of our conversation, check out Episode 330 Handling Conflict Right with Amanda Ripley.

About Amanda: 

Amanda Ripley is an investigative journalist and author. Her most recent book is High Conflict, which chronicles how people get trapped by conflicts of all kinds—and how they get out. Her previous books include The Unthinkable, and The Smartest Kids in the World, a New York Times bestseller which was also turned into a documentary film.

IG: @ripleywriter @thegoodconflict

Today, we’re sharing our first conversation with one of our favorite teachers – Martha Beck. We talk about letting go of control, cultivating joy, strategies for making hard decisions when we’re scared, and learning to recognize and pursue what feels like freedom. 

Discover:

-How do we tap back into living by our inner compass after living by consensus and following outer voices for so long?

-What Martha said to Glennon and Abby when they told her they were in love but scared to move forward—and how that advice changed their lives.

-How to make a plan to cultivate joy when it feels like you are army-crawling through life. 

About Martha:

Dr. Martha Beck is a New York Times bestselling author, life coach, and speaker. She holds three Harvard degrees in social science, and Oprah Winfrey has called her “one of the smartest women I know.” Martha is a passionate and engaging teacher, known for her unique combination of science, humor, and spirituality. Her most recent book, The Way of Integrity: Finding the Path to Your True Self, was an instant New York Times Best Seller.

IG: @themarthabeck

350. Secrets to a Joyful Life with Ina Garten

Ina Garten – the iconic Barefoot Contessa – shares her best life and business advice and her tips for how to host a successful dinner party. Plus, the details behind an unforgettable night with Abby, Ina, Taylor Swift, and beer pong; 

Discover:

-Ina’s surefire way to silence the inner-critic; 

-Why satisfaction has everything to do with not settling; and 

-What the key to having a fun dinner party can teach us about life. 

About Ina: Ina Garten has hosted her Emmy and James Beard Award winning show, Barefoot Contessa, on the Food Network since 2002 and recently launched a new interview focused series, Be My Guest, with Food Network and discovery+. She has published thirteen cookbooks, including eleven #1 New York Times bestsellers. In 2015 Ina Garten was named one of Time Magazine’s 100 Most Influential People.

She lives in East Hampton, New York with her husband, Jeffrey.

Her new memoir Be Ready When the Luck Happens is available now.

Part systems expert, part permission giver, Kendra Adachi, The Lazy Genius, is here to help you be a genius about the things that matter and lazy about the things that don't.

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349. How to Stop Pleasing and Start Living

Amanda and Glennon answer your questions about friendship, mental health, people pleasing and the difference between boundaries and control. 

Discover: 

-Why if you’re a person who “goes with the flow” you might want to reconsider;

-What to do when you feel the loss of a friend getting into a new relationship;

-The truth about married men who refuse to socialize with women who are not their wife; and 

-The healing power of getting a mental health diagnosis later in life.